The Art____Chapter 6:
by GreggSharp
Ranma 1/2 created by Rumiko Takahashi, AMG created by Kosuke Fujishima, Gold Digger owned/created by Fred Perry, Megumi Hayashibara is a goddess of cute.
i don't have money so don't sue me, hire me and we can BOTH make money. does anyone actually read these things.
---------
THE ART 6: TALE OF MOUSSE AND SQUIRREL
The "Lynch Genma" party came back to the Tendo-ke disheartened. The only trace they'd found of the panda was a note stating something about going on a training journey. All things considered, that probably meant he wasn't on the same dimensional plane at this point. Probably spying on the Kachina spirits or trying to pick up tantric magic from the Hindus, at least that was the consensus.
"So, Ukyou," Akane said with a thoughtful expression, "you've been following Ranma for eight years or so?"
"Yes, sugar. I made the mistake of listening to that Ryouga, and without any way for me to cross universes without him..." Ukyou shrugged.
"So you visited the Faerie Realms?"
"Yeah, me and Ryouga got into those Mists Of Change, too. Really odd place where what you take as the normal laws of physics just don't seem to work more often than not. Once I threw one of my spatulas, and it turned into a cheese grater before it got halfway to
the target." Ukyou shook her head at the memory.
*SPLASH!*
"What ya do THAT for?!" Ranma-chan looked over at Nabiki with a glare.
"So did Ranma and his father. The Faerie Realms cause one's inner nature to come forward. In this and similar realities, water is the trigger to transform from cursed to uncursed form. Hot to restore, cold to trigger," Nabiki explained.
"So Ranchan's got a feminine side?" Ukyou shrugged. "It could be worse."
*SPLASH!*
"Akane!" Ranma looked over at where Akane was smirking at the pile of clothing that had been Ukyou a moment ago.
"True natures are revealed, right, Ranma? In your case, it's the heritage from your mother the Valkyrie. Your father is a fat lazy panda. Before we go making all nice and friendly with ANOTHER fiancee,
shouldn't we know what she's like?"
"Geez, Akane, Why are you being so..." Nabiki started trying to think of why Akane would be more annoying than usual.
"We're out of Midol."
Shampoo and Nabiki both looked momentarily frightened.
Akane was a berserker. Akane usually had really bad PMS. Berserkers with PMS were something to be feared.
Ranma missed this, his attention on something small moving
in Ukyou's clothing. "Ucchan, I'm sorry about this."
A small fuzzy head peeked out from one of Ukyou's sleeves. Large expressive ears twitched as equally large soulful blue eyes blinked at Ranma. With great hesitation, the small striped body began moving forward.
"Oh, she's sooo cute." Kasumi had woken up in time to see Ukyou get splashed. She'd missed hearing Akane's statement though.
Nabiki frowned as the little creature quickly scrambled free of the sleeve and hid behind Ranma. "I'm not sure what that is. It looks a little bit like a squirrel or a fox, but it also has some feline features."
"I recognize it," Ranma said, holding a hand down for Ukyou. When she didn't move, he slowly brought the hand to her and began stroking the fur. Ukyou very slowly began to relax. "They call them fox-squirrels or squirrelfoxes, or foxcats depending on which world
you find 'em in and they're in several different worlds. They're omnivores, mainly eat fruit and nuts but also small rodents. They fill the same basic niche as cats do on other worlds."
Akane ignored the way Shampoo and Nabiki had both backed away from her. She was fine. Just fine. No problems. "So what's this mean? Can we trust her?"
"Trust her to do what?" Ranma felt the little body tense. "Trust her not to splash YOU with cold water? Yes. If you corner one, their claws and teeth are very very sharp, but they're also very affectionate and loyal creatures." Ranma smiled as she felt the body
relax a little bit. "They make fair watchdogs, are quite territorial, and like a hummingbird, will take on opponents many times their size. They're fast, fairly clever, and easily trained."
Ukyou sniffed, jumped into Ranma's lap and made a slight buzzing noise. She waited until Akane was staring at her before Ukyou stuck her tongue out at Akane.
"AKANE, NO!"
Ukyou-f looked startled and jumped as a large hammer slammed into the space she'd just occupied. The idea that this could happen was apparently a surprise to the little foxcat. She passed Ranma's head, trying to pick up speed.
Even through the haze of pain, Ranma thanked kami that she had been in female form when Mjolnir had slammed into her crossed legs. It wasn't much of a consolation. The blow to her head a moment later at
least removed the awareness of the pain for a time.
Seeing Ranma slam into a wall and then drop like a ragdoll, everyone's shocked gaze switched back to Akane who was chasing the foxcat around, swinging her hammer and making large holes in the surrounding environment.
"COME BACK HERE, YOU!" *SMASH, tinkle.* "YOU LITTLE RODENT! COME BACK HERE!" *CRASH, shatter* "UKYOU, STOP RIGHT THERE!" *THUD, CRUNCH, Smash.*
Shampoo leapt forward between the two. Akane never hit her adopted sister except in sparring matches. They were good friends under it all.
*SLAM!* Shampoo realized in mid-air that Akane had entered her berserker state. At that point she also realized what she was flying towards.
"Akane, no!" Nabiki watched as the television became a piece of abstract art.
Ukyou saw Ranma lying still and raced towards him. She didn't realize how close Akane was, or that both Nabiki and Kasumi were moving to intercept their sister.
"GOT YOU!" Akane slammed the little critter with her hammer as it leapt onto Ranma's chest. "I guess I showed you!"
"Akane," Nabiki said pleasantly. "Actions have consequences."
Kasumi sniffled. Ranma wasn't breathing too well and Ukyou wasn't breathing at all. She felt so helpless. "Don't die. Please don't die."
"I-I didn't mean to..."
"DON'T DIE!" Kasumi screamed. Her third eye opened.
------
Wings fluttered over Nerima, passing the dimly glowing wards of the Three Fates Shrine, a moment later passing a wereboar wandering the streets. He was close, he knew he was close.
---------
Cologne narrowed her eyes. The Tower had just crossed The Lovers. "A new factor enters the scene, disrupting my plans to matchmake my great-granddaughter with the mage Ranma, eh?"
She slapped another card into place. Past Influences was revealed as the Seven of Stars, which she knew from past drawings indicated Genma. No surprise there, disasters surrounded Ranma's father, but it was mainly Ranma who would pay the price for his father's lack of moral strength.
Present Influences was drawn and placed. This was an Amazon deck and had cards that weren't in more traditional decks. This was one of them, the Amazon showing a spear carrying woman standing on the back of a charging horse. Cologne mused as to whether it meant herself or her great-granddaughter, or merely the more common meaning of "a woman in charge" or "skill over force."
Future Influences was no surprise, The Mage. Ranma himself, possibly, as he gained more control over his Art and therefore his environment.
Cologne placed the next three cards in quick succession. Questioner: High Priestess. Environment: Wheel Of Fortune. Modifier: Nine Of Eyes. The questioner was obviously a reference to herself, an Elder of the Chinese Amazons. The Wheel Of Fortune, meant that things
were in flux, a period of chaos where all her carefully laid plans could be set awry. Nine Of Eyes, supernatural evil or black magic.
The final card, the outcome, was carefully laid down. Cologne looked at it in deep thought for several moments before gathering the cards up again. This would never do. Just the number of major arcana that appeared was evidence of something not right. The final card was
of the Six Of Wands. Taken with the others it meant an evil mage of some kind or a practitioner of the Dark Arts.
Her eyes widened. It couldn't be him... could it? Making a sound of disgust, she gathered her things. If THAT fool was involved, then it had become time to take a personal hand in the events.
"Bag, come here." As the old carpetbag scuttled over, Cologne began throwing the items she'd need into it. This was going to be a long trip.
---------
"I'm a what?" Ukyou looked around. "What are you all looking at, anyway?" Hot water had restored her to human form, and she had been glad that Ranma wasn't awake while she scrambled for her clothing.
"The sign of wu on your forehead, mainly," Nabiki explained in a gentle voice. "Ukyou, you're now linked to Kasumi in a rather intimate way."
"What, I..."
Kasumi apologized. She hadn't meant to do anything of the sort.
Nabiki gently explained the situation to Ukyou.
"You ATE MY SOUL!?" Ukyou looked at Kasumi with a horrified expression.
Kasumi apologized again. The Triclops briefly took over, gave Ukyou the redeye. "Biiii-dah!" Then Kasumi was back apologizing again.
Ranma, would have protested over his childhood friend being treated like this, except he was still unconscious.
The Triclops manifested again, staring straight into Ukyou's eyes. Ukyou's eyes went blank almost immediately.
Akane started forward, "Hey, what are you doing?"
The Triclops smiled as Akane was caught in her gaze. "You hit me, half-sister. That hammer of yours hurt, you know." The Triclops was much better at projective telepathy than Kasumi, while Kasumi did emotions and the like quite well, the Triclops had much more control over the ability. She also wasn't nearly as nice as Kasumi.
"Akane," continued the Triclops in a low voice. She then sketched out a series of posthypnotic suggestions for what would be thoroughly atypical behavior for Akane. "Now go over into the corner, wake up, but sit down and shut up until we're done."
Nabiki watched Akane walk over to the corner, sit down, and look very puzzled.
Shampoo watched the two and decided she did NOT want to get involved here. Besides, she was curious herself.
"Now, Ukyou, tell us about your family and your relation to Ranma." The Triclops didn't dislike Ukyou, just considered her a puzzle to be unraveled.
"My clan is Kuonji, and I am the last of my line," Ukyou said as if reciting from some report. "My family line had served the Emperor for one thousand years before falling in the Tokugawa era. We started
out as warriors, samurai. It became obvious during the days of the Shogun Of Darkness that the way of the samurai was not enough. Then came the marriage of one of our line with one of the Tsukitate clan of ninjas, and the subsequent merger. It was a loss of honor, in the pursuit of duty.
"We were slaughtered for political reasons during the Tokugawa era. We served the Imperial family and power was being further drawn from their control. My great-grandfather started working from yattai during this period. We adopted our martial arts to this end and lost much of our magic.
"There is no more we, merely I."
The Triclops pondered this. "Now the rest of my request, what is your relationship to Ranma?"
Ukyou explained how Genma had accepted a dowry from her father, a yattai and a secret scroll with the spells "Hide" and "Leap" for her betrothal to Ranma.
"Ungh," Ranma managed as he got into an upright position. "Ouch. I'll have to cast 'Healing Sleep' on myself later. Huh?"
Ranma's fingers flicked, tracing a pattern in midair. "Kasumi? No, it's not the Triclops..."
"What wrong, Ranma?" Then Shampoo felt it too, a cold sensation as if a chill breeze had come from somewhere.
Ukyou shook her head, clearing it. Something odd was going on, and she'd dispute this violation of her mind when she had a defense against the Triclops.
"Heh heh heh. Shampoo, at last I have found you."
"Oh no," Shampoo backed away. "Ranma, you have really good spells, yes?"
"Well, yeah. I've got enough chi left for some spells."
"Not what I mean. That Mousse's voice. He practitioner of Chinese Black Magic."
"Necromancy? No wonder we're getting the evil aura crap," Nabiki swore. She only had one spirit ward on her (mainly to use on Kasumi if the Triclops got too out-of-hand.)
Kasumi merely sneered. Her fangs made such an expression particularly effective as she was still in Triclops form. "A necromancer? Pfeh."
Shampoo glanced around nervously. Akane hefted her copy of Mjolnir. Nabiki readied her spirit ward. Kasumi held her hands a few inches apart and readied a pattern. Ranma fumbled around in the scrolls he still had for a good anti-undead spell.
"Now I have you, Shampoo!" The voice came again, followed by the sounds of bushes crashing and something slamming into a wall.
Ryouga's voice cut through the brief stillness. "WHO are you calling Shampoo!" *CRASH* "You moron!" *SMASH* "Getting back up, eh? Let's see how you handle a quarter-ton lycanthrope!" *pause* "Squueeaallll" *SNAP, CRACKLE, POP*
The silhouette of Ryouga's wereboar form, aka "Porkchop" walked by the window, briefly stopping to scrape something off of his tusks.
"Aiyaa, good thing Mousse is blind as bat."
The Triclops snorted, then shifted back to Kasumi who started apologizing to Ukyou for what had just occurred.
"Kasumi, I haven't got a problem with you. That three-eyed witch you transform into, on the other hand..." Ukyou glared. "My mind is a very precious possession and I do NOT like people mucking about with it."
"I think I've got some suggestions for dinner tomorrow," Nabiki said with a smile, eager to change the subject. Besides, they had to get some Midol. SOON.
--------
"Hah! Now I have you, Shampoo!" Mousse showed his fangs. "Now you shall be my bride for all eternity!"
Shampoo shook her head and breathed on him. This surprised Mousse who fell over and was writhing on the ground in agony a moment later.
"What? How?"
"Shampoo have many potstickers at dinner."
"And I," Ukyou smiled, "have prepared this! Garlic pizza attack!"
"Arrrgghhhh. I...prefer traditional okonomiyaki!" Mousse was backed into a corner. "Well, I can always be patient, knowing that one day you'll slip up and Shampoo will join me in undeath." Mousse shifted
into bat form.
"LIGHTNING FLARE!" Ranma's lightning bolt slapped the little bat out of the air.
Deciding that maybe the bat wasn't a good idea, Mousse shifted to human form then to a wolf.
"You're right, Shampoo, gullibility factor 7 at least." Nabiki nodded. "Akane?"
"And with the bases loaded," Akane muttering her own play-by-play, "Akane Tendo steps up to the plate. The crowd goes wild."
The wolf looked over at Akane using Mjolnir IV and getting ready to slam him into lunar orbit. He shifted again, back to human and then into a mist. He wondered though, why suddenly everyone except Akane was holding their ears, why Ranma was casting a spell on
Akane, and just what did Akane hope to accomplish by spinning that hammer faster and faster. After all, Mousse knew that he couldn't be hit by that hammer while in mist form.
Ranma's "Greased Lightning" spell accelerated Akane's speed, Akane grinned and threw her hammer as fast and hard as she possibly could.
*BOOM!* The hammer went through the mist, absolutely harmlessly, as Mousse knew it would. What really hurt was the vaccuum formed behind the hammer, the pressure wave around the hammer, and the ionized trail the hammer left behind.
Mousse hit the ground moaning, having had his mist form turned inside out and stretched out over a quarter mile long flight plan. He stood up in the street, shaking his head. "Damn, if I weren't undead that would have killed me."
"Ahem."
"Oh, you, Kasumi isn't it? Well you're not my target of choice, but I really need to drain something to get my strength back. Nothing personal." Mousse stepped forward, baring his fangs.
"Nothing personal," agreed the Triclops.
-------
"Look at this pretty bottle," said Kasumi. "I had it when the Triclops went back to sleep. Funny, I usually remember everything the Triclops does but I don't remember where she got this. It is pretty though, isn't it?"
"Yes, that's very nice. It'd make a great suncatcher don't you think, Ranma?"
"Of course, Nabiki."
"Shampoo know just where to put it, so it get first light of dawn. It look really good there."
The mists within the bottle briefly formed letters. "Could we possibly negotiate this?"
--------
Cologne stopped and watched from a distance. Mousse's intellect had dropped off even further since he'd become undead. Well, it was hardly unexpected. At least she'd put those damn pervert skeletons of his into stasis. She hadn't bothered to destroy them, as you never know when something like that could come in handy.
----------
The Dragon moved from the ice floe into the freezing waters, sliding in without making a single splash despite the great bulk and mass.
It was still going on as had been foreseen.
===================================
Marks end of ch 6 of The Art.
Next Chapter 7:The Choice
Admittedly this is a change of pace after the slapstick of the first few chapters, gomen ne. There will be completely serious chapters, as there was in TOS, but am trying to at least maintain some light heartedness in the series. (Ranma is MAINLY comedy after all.) may have to completely rewrite this later, still not nearly satisfied with it.
Mata ne, minaasan!
by GreggSharp
Ranma 1/2 created by Rumiko Takahashi, AMG created by Kosuke Fujishima, Gold Digger owned/created by Fred Perry, Megumi Hayashibara is a goddess of cute.
i don't have money so don't sue me, hire me and we can BOTH make money. does anyone actually read these things.
---------
THE ART 6: TALE OF MOUSSE AND SQUIRREL
The "Lynch Genma" party came back to the Tendo-ke disheartened. The only trace they'd found of the panda was a note stating something about going on a training journey. All things considered, that probably meant he wasn't on the same dimensional plane at this point. Probably spying on the Kachina spirits or trying to pick up tantric magic from the Hindus, at least that was the consensus.
"So, Ukyou," Akane said with a thoughtful expression, "you've been following Ranma for eight years or so?"
"Yes, sugar. I made the mistake of listening to that Ryouga, and without any way for me to cross universes without him..." Ukyou shrugged.
"So you visited the Faerie Realms?"
"Yeah, me and Ryouga got into those Mists Of Change, too. Really odd place where what you take as the normal laws of physics just don't seem to work more often than not. Once I threw one of my spatulas, and it turned into a cheese grater before it got halfway to
the target." Ukyou shook her head at the memory.
*SPLASH!*
"What ya do THAT for?!" Ranma-chan looked over at Nabiki with a glare.
"So did Ranma and his father. The Faerie Realms cause one's inner nature to come forward. In this and similar realities, water is the trigger to transform from cursed to uncursed form. Hot to restore, cold to trigger," Nabiki explained.
"So Ranchan's got a feminine side?" Ukyou shrugged. "It could be worse."
*SPLASH!*
"Akane!" Ranma looked over at where Akane was smirking at the pile of clothing that had been Ukyou a moment ago.
"True natures are revealed, right, Ranma? In your case, it's the heritage from your mother the Valkyrie. Your father is a fat lazy panda. Before we go making all nice and friendly with ANOTHER fiancee,
shouldn't we know what she's like?"
"Geez, Akane, Why are you being so..." Nabiki started trying to think of why Akane would be more annoying than usual.
"We're out of Midol."
Shampoo and Nabiki both looked momentarily frightened.
Akane was a berserker. Akane usually had really bad PMS. Berserkers with PMS were something to be feared.
Ranma missed this, his attention on something small moving
in Ukyou's clothing. "Ucchan, I'm sorry about this."
A small fuzzy head peeked out from one of Ukyou's sleeves. Large expressive ears twitched as equally large soulful blue eyes blinked at Ranma. With great hesitation, the small striped body began moving forward.
"Oh, she's sooo cute." Kasumi had woken up in time to see Ukyou get splashed. She'd missed hearing Akane's statement though.
Nabiki frowned as the little creature quickly scrambled free of the sleeve and hid behind Ranma. "I'm not sure what that is. It looks a little bit like a squirrel or a fox, but it also has some feline features."
"I recognize it," Ranma said, holding a hand down for Ukyou. When she didn't move, he slowly brought the hand to her and began stroking the fur. Ukyou very slowly began to relax. "They call them fox-squirrels or squirrelfoxes, or foxcats depending on which world
you find 'em in and they're in several different worlds. They're omnivores, mainly eat fruit and nuts but also small rodents. They fill the same basic niche as cats do on other worlds."
Akane ignored the way Shampoo and Nabiki had both backed away from her. She was fine. Just fine. No problems. "So what's this mean? Can we trust her?"
"Trust her to do what?" Ranma felt the little body tense. "Trust her not to splash YOU with cold water? Yes. If you corner one, their claws and teeth are very very sharp, but they're also very affectionate and loyal creatures." Ranma smiled as she felt the body
relax a little bit. "They make fair watchdogs, are quite territorial, and like a hummingbird, will take on opponents many times their size. They're fast, fairly clever, and easily trained."
Ukyou sniffed, jumped into Ranma's lap and made a slight buzzing noise. She waited until Akane was staring at her before Ukyou stuck her tongue out at Akane.
"AKANE, NO!"
Ukyou-f looked startled and jumped as a large hammer slammed into the space she'd just occupied. The idea that this could happen was apparently a surprise to the little foxcat. She passed Ranma's head, trying to pick up speed.
Even through the haze of pain, Ranma thanked kami that she had been in female form when Mjolnir had slammed into her crossed legs. It wasn't much of a consolation. The blow to her head a moment later at
least removed the awareness of the pain for a time.
Seeing Ranma slam into a wall and then drop like a ragdoll, everyone's shocked gaze switched back to Akane who was chasing the foxcat around, swinging her hammer and making large holes in the surrounding environment.
"COME BACK HERE, YOU!" *SMASH, tinkle.* "YOU LITTLE RODENT! COME BACK HERE!" *CRASH, shatter* "UKYOU, STOP RIGHT THERE!" *THUD, CRUNCH, Smash.*
Shampoo leapt forward between the two. Akane never hit her adopted sister except in sparring matches. They were good friends under it all.
*SLAM!* Shampoo realized in mid-air that Akane had entered her berserker state. At that point she also realized what she was flying towards.
"Akane, no!" Nabiki watched as the television became a piece of abstract art.
Ukyou saw Ranma lying still and raced towards him. She didn't realize how close Akane was, or that both Nabiki and Kasumi were moving to intercept their sister.
"GOT YOU!" Akane slammed the little critter with her hammer as it leapt onto Ranma's chest. "I guess I showed you!"
"Akane," Nabiki said pleasantly. "Actions have consequences."
Kasumi sniffled. Ranma wasn't breathing too well and Ukyou wasn't breathing at all. She felt so helpless. "Don't die. Please don't die."
"I-I didn't mean to..."
"DON'T DIE!" Kasumi screamed. Her third eye opened.
------
Wings fluttered over Nerima, passing the dimly glowing wards of the Three Fates Shrine, a moment later passing a wereboar wandering the streets. He was close, he knew he was close.
---------
Cologne narrowed her eyes. The Tower had just crossed The Lovers. "A new factor enters the scene, disrupting my plans to matchmake my great-granddaughter with the mage Ranma, eh?"
She slapped another card into place. Past Influences was revealed as the Seven of Stars, which she knew from past drawings indicated Genma. No surprise there, disasters surrounded Ranma's father, but it was mainly Ranma who would pay the price for his father's lack of moral strength.
Present Influences was drawn and placed. This was an Amazon deck and had cards that weren't in more traditional decks. This was one of them, the Amazon showing a spear carrying woman standing on the back of a charging horse. Cologne mused as to whether it meant herself or her great-granddaughter, or merely the more common meaning of "a woman in charge" or "skill over force."
Future Influences was no surprise, The Mage. Ranma himself, possibly, as he gained more control over his Art and therefore his environment.
Cologne placed the next three cards in quick succession. Questioner: High Priestess. Environment: Wheel Of Fortune. Modifier: Nine Of Eyes. The questioner was obviously a reference to herself, an Elder of the Chinese Amazons. The Wheel Of Fortune, meant that things
were in flux, a period of chaos where all her carefully laid plans could be set awry. Nine Of Eyes, supernatural evil or black magic.
The final card, the outcome, was carefully laid down. Cologne looked at it in deep thought for several moments before gathering the cards up again. This would never do. Just the number of major arcana that appeared was evidence of something not right. The final card was
of the Six Of Wands. Taken with the others it meant an evil mage of some kind or a practitioner of the Dark Arts.
Her eyes widened. It couldn't be him... could it? Making a sound of disgust, she gathered her things. If THAT fool was involved, then it had become time to take a personal hand in the events.
"Bag, come here." As the old carpetbag scuttled over, Cologne began throwing the items she'd need into it. This was going to be a long trip.
---------
"I'm a what?" Ukyou looked around. "What are you all looking at, anyway?" Hot water had restored her to human form, and she had been glad that Ranma wasn't awake while she scrambled for her clothing.
"The sign of wu on your forehead, mainly," Nabiki explained in a gentle voice. "Ukyou, you're now linked to Kasumi in a rather intimate way."
"What, I..."
Kasumi apologized. She hadn't meant to do anything of the sort.
Nabiki gently explained the situation to Ukyou.
"You ATE MY SOUL!?" Ukyou looked at Kasumi with a horrified expression.
Kasumi apologized again. The Triclops briefly took over, gave Ukyou the redeye. "Biiii-dah!" Then Kasumi was back apologizing again.
Ranma, would have protested over his childhood friend being treated like this, except he was still unconscious.
The Triclops manifested again, staring straight into Ukyou's eyes. Ukyou's eyes went blank almost immediately.
Akane started forward, "Hey, what are you doing?"
The Triclops smiled as Akane was caught in her gaze. "You hit me, half-sister. That hammer of yours hurt, you know." The Triclops was much better at projective telepathy than Kasumi, while Kasumi did emotions and the like quite well, the Triclops had much more control over the ability. She also wasn't nearly as nice as Kasumi.
"Akane," continued the Triclops in a low voice. She then sketched out a series of posthypnotic suggestions for what would be thoroughly atypical behavior for Akane. "Now go over into the corner, wake up, but sit down and shut up until we're done."
Nabiki watched Akane walk over to the corner, sit down, and look very puzzled.
Shampoo watched the two and decided she did NOT want to get involved here. Besides, she was curious herself.
"Now, Ukyou, tell us about your family and your relation to Ranma." The Triclops didn't dislike Ukyou, just considered her a puzzle to be unraveled.
"My clan is Kuonji, and I am the last of my line," Ukyou said as if reciting from some report. "My family line had served the Emperor for one thousand years before falling in the Tokugawa era. We started
out as warriors, samurai. It became obvious during the days of the Shogun Of Darkness that the way of the samurai was not enough. Then came the marriage of one of our line with one of the Tsukitate clan of ninjas, and the subsequent merger. It was a loss of honor, in the pursuit of duty.
"We were slaughtered for political reasons during the Tokugawa era. We served the Imperial family and power was being further drawn from their control. My great-grandfather started working from yattai during this period. We adopted our martial arts to this end and lost much of our magic.
"There is no more we, merely I."
The Triclops pondered this. "Now the rest of my request, what is your relationship to Ranma?"
Ukyou explained how Genma had accepted a dowry from her father, a yattai and a secret scroll with the spells "Hide" and "Leap" for her betrothal to Ranma.
"Ungh," Ranma managed as he got into an upright position. "Ouch. I'll have to cast 'Healing Sleep' on myself later. Huh?"
Ranma's fingers flicked, tracing a pattern in midair. "Kasumi? No, it's not the Triclops..."
"What wrong, Ranma?" Then Shampoo felt it too, a cold sensation as if a chill breeze had come from somewhere.
Ukyou shook her head, clearing it. Something odd was going on, and she'd dispute this violation of her mind when she had a defense against the Triclops.
"Heh heh heh. Shampoo, at last I have found you."
"Oh no," Shampoo backed away. "Ranma, you have really good spells, yes?"
"Well, yeah. I've got enough chi left for some spells."
"Not what I mean. That Mousse's voice. He practitioner of Chinese Black Magic."
"Necromancy? No wonder we're getting the evil aura crap," Nabiki swore. She only had one spirit ward on her (mainly to use on Kasumi if the Triclops got too out-of-hand.)
Kasumi merely sneered. Her fangs made such an expression particularly effective as she was still in Triclops form. "A necromancer? Pfeh."
Shampoo glanced around nervously. Akane hefted her copy of Mjolnir. Nabiki readied her spirit ward. Kasumi held her hands a few inches apart and readied a pattern. Ranma fumbled around in the scrolls he still had for a good anti-undead spell.
"Now I have you, Shampoo!" The voice came again, followed by the sounds of bushes crashing and something slamming into a wall.
Ryouga's voice cut through the brief stillness. "WHO are you calling Shampoo!" *CRASH* "You moron!" *SMASH* "Getting back up, eh? Let's see how you handle a quarter-ton lycanthrope!" *pause* "Squueeaallll" *SNAP, CRACKLE, POP*
The silhouette of Ryouga's wereboar form, aka "Porkchop" walked by the window, briefly stopping to scrape something off of his tusks.
"Aiyaa, good thing Mousse is blind as bat."
The Triclops snorted, then shifted back to Kasumi who started apologizing to Ukyou for what had just occurred.
"Kasumi, I haven't got a problem with you. That three-eyed witch you transform into, on the other hand..." Ukyou glared. "My mind is a very precious possession and I do NOT like people mucking about with it."
"I think I've got some suggestions for dinner tomorrow," Nabiki said with a smile, eager to change the subject. Besides, they had to get some Midol. SOON.
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"Hah! Now I have you, Shampoo!" Mousse showed his fangs. "Now you shall be my bride for all eternity!"
Shampoo shook her head and breathed on him. This surprised Mousse who fell over and was writhing on the ground in agony a moment later.
"What? How?"
"Shampoo have many potstickers at dinner."
"And I," Ukyou smiled, "have prepared this! Garlic pizza attack!"
"Arrrgghhhh. I...prefer traditional okonomiyaki!" Mousse was backed into a corner. "Well, I can always be patient, knowing that one day you'll slip up and Shampoo will join me in undeath." Mousse shifted
into bat form.
"LIGHTNING FLARE!" Ranma's lightning bolt slapped the little bat out of the air.
Deciding that maybe the bat wasn't a good idea, Mousse shifted to human form then to a wolf.
"You're right, Shampoo, gullibility factor 7 at least." Nabiki nodded. "Akane?"
"And with the bases loaded," Akane muttering her own play-by-play, "Akane Tendo steps up to the plate. The crowd goes wild."
The wolf looked over at Akane using Mjolnir IV and getting ready to slam him into lunar orbit. He shifted again, back to human and then into a mist. He wondered though, why suddenly everyone except Akane was holding their ears, why Ranma was casting a spell on
Akane, and just what did Akane hope to accomplish by spinning that hammer faster and faster. After all, Mousse knew that he couldn't be hit by that hammer while in mist form.
Ranma's "Greased Lightning" spell accelerated Akane's speed, Akane grinned and threw her hammer as fast and hard as she possibly could.
*BOOM!* The hammer went through the mist, absolutely harmlessly, as Mousse knew it would. What really hurt was the vaccuum formed behind the hammer, the pressure wave around the hammer, and the ionized trail the hammer left behind.
Mousse hit the ground moaning, having had his mist form turned inside out and stretched out over a quarter mile long flight plan. He stood up in the street, shaking his head. "Damn, if I weren't undead that would have killed me."
"Ahem."
"Oh, you, Kasumi isn't it? Well you're not my target of choice, but I really need to drain something to get my strength back. Nothing personal." Mousse stepped forward, baring his fangs.
"Nothing personal," agreed the Triclops.
-------
"Look at this pretty bottle," said Kasumi. "I had it when the Triclops went back to sleep. Funny, I usually remember everything the Triclops does but I don't remember where she got this. It is pretty though, isn't it?"
"Yes, that's very nice. It'd make a great suncatcher don't you think, Ranma?"
"Of course, Nabiki."
"Shampoo know just where to put it, so it get first light of dawn. It look really good there."
The mists within the bottle briefly formed letters. "Could we possibly negotiate this?"
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Cologne stopped and watched from a distance. Mousse's intellect had dropped off even further since he'd become undead. Well, it was hardly unexpected. At least she'd put those damn pervert skeletons of his into stasis. She hadn't bothered to destroy them, as you never know when something like that could come in handy.
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The Dragon moved from the ice floe into the freezing waters, sliding in without making a single splash despite the great bulk and mass.
It was still going on as had been foreseen.
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Marks end of ch 6 of The Art.
Next Chapter 7:The Choice
Admittedly this is a change of pace after the slapstick of the first few chapters, gomen ne. There will be completely serious chapters, as there was in TOS, but am trying to at least maintain some light heartedness in the series. (Ranma is MAINLY comedy after all.) may have to completely rewrite this later, still not nearly satisfied with it.
Mata ne, minaasan!
