What Lies Behind the Secret's Wall Part 2: Don't Tell... Not!
A/N: All characters J. K.'s. Not mine. WHY DO I ALWAYS HAVE TO BE FUNNY IN DISCLAIMERS? FINE! YOU TRY IT, THEN! Ahem... anyway, please enjoy.

Harry looked around at the eager faces. He looked down at the page and felt his face burn with excitement. "Er... September 2nd... Dear Diary, Yesterday was the dullest feast Hogwarts has ever seen. And guess what else? Harry Potter is here. Can you believe it? Obviously the little brat was sorted into Gryffindor."
Harry paused to let everyone cheer.
"Today I taught Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw second years first. Really, those Hufflepuffs are dunderheads."
Everyone gave an indignant yell. There was nothing wrong with Hufflepuff. Leave it to the head of Slytherin to say something like that.
"Ravenclaw, I must say, allthough still hated, I mean, they're not Slytherin, is the easiest house to teach, I must confess. They grab a concept easily. There's never any explosions or any other such nonsense. Of course, I hate them all, not being Slytherin, but I confess, they are all brighter than any genius in my house."
The Gryffindors nodded, understandingly, and Harry continued.
"But, the worst house to teach is Gryffindor."
The Gryffindors grinned. Being disliked by Snape was an honor.
"And the worst year is first."
The fifth years grinned, knowing that this had been five years ago.
"You know why? Because..." Harry was grinning madly at this point. "Because Harry Potter and his stupid little bratty friend, Ron Weasley, (Ugh! Another Weasley!) are in it!"
Everyone cheered as Harry and Ron laughed happily. Hermione was at loss of words. She was too humored to even laugh. She was just grinning, trying to laugh.
Harry continued to read. "Ugh! Disgusting! Well, I'm going to sleep now. Tomorrow."
Harry stopped to allow everyone to discuss the entry. Hermione was the first to voice her opinion. "Well, I must say, there's nothing embarassing yet... nothing we can use to blackmail him, as was our original plan, but..." She stopped because she was laughing to hard. The whole room immediately started chattering away.
"Um, excuse me!" Harry said. "Excuse me!"
Hermione, noticing Harry's trouble yelled, "Everybody shut up and listen!!!"
Everyone did.
"Er... would you like to hear the next entry?" Harry asked.
Everone did.
"Okay. September 4... Dear Diary, Sorry I didn't write yesterday. A bit busy, I was. I have a secret."
The room was silent. Everyone was leaning as close as possible to Harry. Those who had been sitting in arm chairs left to sit on the ground so they could hear better.
Harry resumed reading. "This summer, I..." He trailed off, laughing too hard to speak. Ron snapped the book from Harry's hands. Hermione took it from Ron. Next it went the Fred, then to George, before Lee Jordan wrenched it away and began to read. He was quite funny, really. He did a perfect imitation of Snape's cold voice.
"This is hard to say. But, well, this summer, I went to buy new underwear for the school year. It's my favorite type of clothing."
Everyone gave more than an appreciative chuckle. The room really did sound full of lions, what with all the roaring inside.
Outside, Snape was trying to convince the fat lady to let him in while he tried to think of every password possible.
Lee grinned. "Wait 'till you hear what's coming next. Anyway, I always get white underwear, *always*. But, they didn't have it. The only thing they had was..."
Lee paused for air, and and a quick laugh, he couldn't hold it in much longer. "The only thing they had in my size was... Barbie underwear!!!"
The room made such a noise, that from the the Hufflepuff, to the Ravenclaw, to the Slytherin common rooms, every person in Hogwarts school had to cover their ears, and half still ended up with shattered eardrums. And you can only IMAGINE what happened to Snape, who was standing with his ear pressed against the wall, trying to hear when they would get to this exact spot.
But Lee wasn't finished. "And I LIKE WEARING IT!!!"
This, shattered everyone's eardrums, and nearly knocked Snape out. He groaned.
The rest of the evening went on somewhat like this. Snape listened to the pickle jar story, the curse story, the Gryffindor compared to Slytherin story. (Which wasn't exactly hilarious exept for the Quidditch part), and a lot more that he won't let me tell you.
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A/N: That was the end of this part, but I may write more. If I do, it will probably just be loose entries from his diary.

DA END