By Darqstar
I can't believe it; I lost.
I wanted to win so badly, I tried so hard, but my best wasn't good enough. He won. He's younger than me and he won.
He's my friend and I should be happy, but I'm not. I'm watching him. His family surrounds him; they're hugging him, congratulating him. It's not fair, because I know even if he lost, they'd be doing the same thing. Hugging him, telling him how great he was, how hard he tried and how it didn't matter if he won or lost, that they still love him.
I thought I had him, I really did. He came so close to touching the ground outside the arena on my last move. I cheated, I know. I used my left hand for an energy blast and I powered up to Super Saiyin, but I had to win.
It didn't work. Just before his foot touched, he powered up, flipped around and charged me. I wasn't expecting it. He hit me with such force that I was knocked clear out of the ring. He's won.
He has everything, Goten does. No, not money wise. My family is much better off than his. My bedroom is huge and crammed full of toys. His room is tiny, he shares it with his brother and all his toys are hand-me-downs from Gohan. But he has a brother who plays with him, who thinks he's great. He has a mother who loves him. And even though his father is dead, his father loves him. He may have said he came back from the dead for one day, just to go to this contest, but I think the real reason was to meet Goten and see his family.
I don't have any brothers or sisters. I do have a great mom, but my dad... Well, I love him, and I think he loves me, but he's so hard on me. He never tells me I'm doing good, he almost never plays with me and when he does, he acts like he's only doing it to shut me up. All my dad wants to do is train, train, train. I don't mind training, but I'm a kid, I want to play too. I want to have fun.
Why does my dad have to be The Prince Of All Saiyins? Why can't he be a regular person? Or at least a regular Saiyin like Goku - Oh, excuse me, I'm supposed to only call him Kakarot, cause my dad says so. Kakarot died before I was old enough to get to know him, but Gohan talks about him all the time and says how neat he is/was.
My dad says I have to be the best. I mean, I think every dad wants his son to be the best, but my father is so persistent about it and I don't always understand why. One time when we were training (which is about all we do together) I started getting silly. I just didn't feel like training, I wanted to have fun. So I was bouncing around, messing with the gravity controls, making the gravity go way down instead of way up so I could float. Dad kept getting madder and madder and finally he grabbed me and slammed me into the wall, hard.
He looked at me and screamed, "I will not watch you die again; do you understand me!"
I was scared. Not because he had hurt me, but because I didn't understand what he was saying. Watch me die? What the heck was he talking about? But I said I understood, just so he wouldn't keep yelling at me.
Did I die once and forget?
Goten never had these problems. Goten doesn't have The Prince Of All Saiyins for a dad. Goten gets to have fun. I train day and night.
And Goten wins the Jr. Division of the Worlds Martial Arts competition.
Even if he had lost, it would have been okay. He's younger than me, that would have made it okay. His family, they would have said, "Aw, Trunks is a year older than you. He had an advantage."
I was so hoping that if I won this...if I beat Goten, for once, my dad would be proud of me. I blew it.
I'm watching them, Goten and his family. They look so happy. Goku, I mean, Kakarot is swinging him in the air, saying, "That's my boy!" Chi-Chi is telling him how proud she is. Gohan is patting him on the head. Even my mom is over there, congratulating them.
No one is looking for me. You don't look for losers, only winners and I'm not a winner.
I know that once the excitement dies down a bit, my mom will find me and tell me everything is all right. But my father? He's going to be so mad at me. I don't know if he'll ever speak to me or exactly what's going to happen. I do know there will be hell to pay and I'm the one who's going to have to write the check.
I wander off; no one seems to notice. I need to be alone a bit. Just a little bit. I see a tree, off to the side. I go over and stand under it, my back to the arena, where Goten is king for now.
I will not cry. Crying is for babies and I'm not a baby.
These are not tears. No they aren't. It's the pollen in the air. I have a touch of allergies. Something else my dad can get upset about. I must have some "human" weaknesses I got from my mother.
At least they aren't tears.
I'm so busy trying to convince myself that the prickles behind my eyes aren't signs of crying that I don't even notice someone has come up behind me until they speak.
"Trunks!"
I flinch quickly, but I don't turn around. I know the voice and it's the last voice I want to hear right now. So I keep my back to the owner of the voice and stare at the ground. I wish I could just not answer, but I don't want to make him more upset. "Yes, father?"
Even though I can't see him, I can guess what he looks like now. His arms are folded over his chest, his eyes narrow and cold as he contemplates how he ended up having such a loser for a son. Go on, I think, say it! I know you want to.
For a moment, time stands still while I'm waiting for the anger. Finally, he speaks. "Saiyins always learn something in every battle they fight. When a Saiyin loses, it makes him even stronger for his next battle."
I want to take comfort in those words, but I know they aren't meant for my comfort. They are meant for his. He's trying to find some way not to be so disappointed in me. He must be regretting he ever had me. I don't speak; I have no idea what to say.
He finally breaks the silence. "Son, I have only one question for you."
I know better than to remain silent. "What?" I whisper, knowing he'll hear.
"Did you try your best?"
I feel like someone stuck a dagger into my soul. Why did he have to ask that? If I hadn't tried my best, I could say so, then he'd think I "threw" the fight, so Goten and his family could have the money. But I can't lie. He'd see right through me if I did. So, I swallow, noticing my allergies are starting to really come on strong. "Yes, father, " I whisper. "I tried my very best. I guess it wasn't good enough."
"Turn and face me, Trunks."
I know my dad well enough to know that is not a suggestion, it is a direct order. Slowly, painfully, I turn around, but keep my eyes on the ground.
"Look at me, Son."
Another order. He's never going to believe I have allergies. He's going to know these are tears in my eyes. But again, I cannot disobey. I look up at him. He's staring at me with an expression I've never seen before. I can't read it. He says nothing about my tears though. It's as if he doesn't even see them.
"As long as you did your best, you have nothing to be ashamed of."
"Father-" I begin and then stop. I shake my head. What did he just say? "But... but father, I-I lost!"
"And I have lost before as well," he says. "But, Son, I tell you this. A true warrior always does his best. And if you can walk away from a battle honestly knowing you did whatever you could to win, then you can stand just as tall and proud as the victor. "
I almost can't believe it. My father is saying this to me. My father! No, this can't be right. He's just trying to make me feel better. "But-but-"
"No buts," he says, holding up one hand in a stop gestures. His arms aren't crossed over his chest anymore. "As I said, as long as you did your best, you can be proud of yourself. And you should be. After all, it was a good battle. You and Goten fought well. And I am proud of you."
What? He's proud of me? I don't think he's ever told me that in his life. I lost and he's proud of me?
I suddenly feel like someone took a million pounds off my shoulders. My father is proud of me; my father loves me. My tears are dried up in an instant, as if they were never there. I can't help it.
I leap in the air and fling myself into my father's arms. He catches me, a little surprised at what I'm doing, but it doesn't matter. I wrap my arms around him, hugging him tightly. He hesitates, and then hugs me back.
I wonder; would this be happening if I had won the match? Probably not. My dad would have just said something like, "Good, your training paid off." Or maybe he wouldn't have said anything.
I look over his shoulder, where Goten and his family are still celebrating. Goten sees me and quickly waves. I wave back. I don't envy him for winning anymore.
Because as far as I'm concerned, I'm the winner of this battle.
The End
