True To Your Heart [4]
True To Your Heart
Part IV
by SwordSkill

Author's Notes: Geez, I really had to work on Rong Lei-lei and Kuan Ming's characterization so they could look beautiful and handsome respectively. (grin) They're adding to the complications of the plot. BTW, I want to clarify something. There is not much gender distinction in Chinese names, so don't confuse Xiao Ling (an original character) with Ling. Xiao Ling is a figment of my imagination, and she's Mulan's good friend in this fic (and oh yeah, she's a girl) and Ling is the male recruit in the original movie of Mulan (he doesn't appear in the fic at all). Please R/R!


Mulan felt miserable as she rode K'han into the city. She felt as if something priceless had been taken away from her, which was, of course, Shang's friendship. Why must she lose it in this way?

Well, it was Shang's fault, anyway. If he didn't bring the subject up, everything would have been fine. Now he's spoiled everything.

Just when she was about to take the bend in the road which led to her house, she stopped. She couldn't face her parents now, after all that's happened; they would be so disappointed, and they wouldn't understand! And what about Grandma? Her sharp tongue would be the death of her.

Instead, Mulan felt herself wandering aimlessly throughout the city, seeking solace, yet unable to find it. She finally set herself by a pond and jumped down from K'han, seating herself on the grass and watching the little fishes swim by.

"You're looking pale, Mulan. What happened?"

Mulan turned and saw her friend Xiao Ling approach her. She was about Mulan's age, and Mulan knew that she wasn't exactly a great comfort because of her unintentional bluntness, but she would and can listen.

"Just about the most terrible thing," said Mulan chokily. "Have you heard of the rumors about Shang and I?"

"Who hasn't?" snorted Xiao Ling, which made Mulan feel worse.

Mulan proceeded to tell her about the last ten months, Shang's new assignment, and finally, the horrible proposal. All the while Xiao Ling listened with great attention.

When Mulan finished, Xiao Ling burst out, "And you've gone and refused Shang. What a stupid thing to do!"

"Do you call refusing to marry a man I don't love stupid?" asked Mulan icily, trying hard not to cry. "I don't love him, Xiao Ling, and I probably never will after all that's happened.

"Love? You don't know love when you see it, Mulan," said Xiao Ling, spiritedly. "You think it's a...a more grandeur thing, and not coming humbly from a man like Shang."

"And I suppose you're an expert at making your mind to whom people should marry?" said Mulan, keeping her emotions in check.

Xiao Ling softened and said, "You should probably go home now. Home's the greatest comfort, and besides, your folks might be worried sick about you."

Mulan sighed and slowly mounted back on K'han's back. "I guess. I'm sorry if I bothered you. It's just that losing Shang's friendship is..."

"Such a big blow, I know." Xiao Ling patted K'han's nose. "I know how it feels, like when a very close friend of mine died."

Mulan cringed. It reminded her that Shang would be away after two weeks.

As if reading her mind, Xiao Ling said. "Think it over, Mulan, before it's too late. Try to patch things up with Shang. You know, persuade him to be a friend again."

"We are beyond patching," said Mulan. "But I'll give it some thought. Well, so long and thanks for listening!" Mulan spurred K'han and dashed home.

****************************************************

After Mulan settled K'han back at the stable, she quickly and quietly tried to get in the house without bumping into any of her family. She had to be alone to arrange the barrage of thoughts that attacked her. She crept in the door, past Fa Li who was busy cooking, past Grandmother who was snoring by the couch, past Papa who was absorbed in writing calligraphy by the living room table, and zip to her room.

She closed the door, sat down the bed, and sighed.

Now their comradeship was broken and Shang would regard her as a girl who played with him and amused herself. She buried her head on the pillow. She'll never live this down. It was all Shang's fault. She never showed any signs of affection, and if Shang ever did, he was a poor shower of signs. Why was he so arrogant that he couldn't accept the fact that they were only friends?

All day long she tried to believe what she thought, but her conscience was weighing her down. During meals, her family could see her poking around the bowl and not joining any of the conversations. That night, she couldn't get rid of the flashbacks of what had happened that day, and how awful she felt for turning him down.

Someone ya know is on your side can set you free.
I can do that for you if you believe in me.
Why second-guess
What feels so right?
Just trust your heart,
And you'll see the light!

Yes. That's it. Somehow she'll have to go to him and persuade him to accept her as only what she was offering: a friend and nothing more. If he refuses...well, she'll just have to live without him.

The next day, Mulan ate a hurried breakfast and put a modest robe. She didn't want to look any more fascinating, if that's what Shang had thought of her. Telling her family that she had left something in Shang's house, she quickly walked towards Shang's house.

Just on the bend that led to Shang's house, she happened to bump into Xiao Ling.

"Oh, hey Mulan," said Xiao Ling. "You going to Shang's to see if...

"Yes, I am."

Xiao Ling looked a bit uncomfortable before saying, "I just came from the market, and, well...this is just a rumor, Mulan, so don't get too excited, but there are a lot of people saying that Shang switches from one girl to another as normally as changing clothes."

"Oh." Mulan swallowed. Then as calmly as she could, she said, "And?"

"And they say that Shang's been seeing this girl called Rong Lei-lei since yesterday."

"So?" Mulan bit her lip when she said this.

Xiao Ling looked a little surprised as she said, "Well, I thought that I should warn you since you might get a little disturbed when you seem them...uh, together."

"Disturbed? For what? Who he's courting...er, seeing now isn't my business." There was a little edge in Mulan's voice.

Xiao Ling noticed the edge and said, "But don't worry, it's just a rumor."

"Who's worrying?" Mulan gave a little titter. "Why should it matter to me who he's with? I'm just going there to tell him to be friends again."

"Uh-huh." Xiao Ling sounded like she didn't believe her. Then she shrugged and said, "It probably would simmer down. You know how rumors are."

"Of course."

"Right. Well, I'll have to get going now. Mom's expecting these scallops." Xiao Ling quickly went to her way.

Mulan called, "See you soon, Xiao Ling," and faced Shang's house.

Very well, he's free to his own will, anyway. No one's stopping him.

Mulan tried to feel calm as her blood began to boil. Then she thought, Of course, it wouldn't hurt a bit to see this "Rong Lei-lei."

She quickly climbed over the vines growing on the wall of Shang's gate. Still not forgetting the techniques she learned at boot camp, she craftily climbed through the trees and slid down the wall without making a sound. Quietly, she made her way to the main house and settled herself at the hedge. She peeped into the window.

There was Shang, coming out of a room. He seemed to be talking with somebody from that certain room. Mulan inched her ear a bit toward the window.

"...looking very nice today, Lei-lei," she heard him say.

"Well, I'm very honored to be with the general of the troops," said a tinkling, female voice. Then she stepped out.

Mulan felt very raggedy just seeing her.

Rong Lei-lei was tall and ravishingly beautiful, with soft, creamy skin that contrasted her long, shining, raven hair. Her dark eyes gleamed and her face was blemishless. She wore an elegant dark-blue gown that accented the voluptuous curves in her arms and the arc of her delicate neck.

Suddenly, Mulan's alert instincts rang out. She hurriedly slipped to the other side of the wall just as Shang and Lei-lei opened the door and walked out. Mulan peeped.

Shang was looking exceptionally handsome, wearing a red, formal robe reserved only for special occasions. He smiled at Lei-lei as she chattered nonstop, and Mulan felt something twinge somewhere below her heart.

Mulan kept silent as she watched them go out of the gate, then she blew out the breath that she wasn't aware she was holding.

She couldn't blame Shang. Lei-lei was beautiful beyond imagination and she had a happy, cheerful disposition. And that hair...Mulan fingered her own hair. She had shorn it short before the war, but it was growing fast again. Maybe, just maybe, she could let it flow like Lei-lei's.

Mulan slowly scaled the gate, thinking. The way Shang smiled at Lei-lei was a sure sign that he was in love with her. What man wouldn't be? Just leave Lei-lei on the square and the boys will stick to her like bees on honey. And the way he complimented on Lei-lei...Shang's never done that to Mulan.

Well, I won't be discouraged, thought Mulan, trying to convince herself. So Shang got a beautiful girl; I should congratulate him. He certainly won a prize for himself. Then with vengeance she did not realize she harbored, She'll certainly be a pleasant change to Shang after hanging around with me.

Mulan sighed as she walked down the streets. Well, maybe having Lei-lei around would be a good thing. Maybe she and Shang could be friends again. Mulan wouldn't have to see Shang scowling at her, and it would be clearer on her conscience that Shang was very happy. It was just unfortunate that something was telling her she wouldn't be as happy as he was.

She heard drops of rain splatter on the sidewalk. She looked at the sky and to the dark clouds that hovered above the rooftops. And without her unbrella too. Her house was a good distance from Shang's, and now she'd have to run for cover.

"Oh no." The torrent of rain came with a swish and a rush. Soon, Mulan was shivering in her thoroughly wet robe. And then there was a voice behind her.

"Excuse me, maybe you could use this. A beautiful girl like you shouldn't be getting wet."

Mulan looked behind her. Tall, handsome, chiseled features, and that rich, golden voice--yes, the man that Mulan had once wished for before Shang entered the scene. His green robe dressed his well-built frame and his dark, melting eyes pierced straight into Mulan's heart. He held out an open silk umbrella for her.

"Why, thank you," said Mulan uncertainly, taking the umbrella. It could only house one. "Are you sure you won't need it?"

The handsome stranger smiled and shook his head. "There's a small shelter there. We could wait until the storm blows over."

The two hurried to an empty stall and thankfully sought its shelter.

"That caught me by surprise," said Mulan laughing, holding up her askewed hair and looking at the unknown. It was then she realized he was staring at her admiringly. Her heart thudded wildly.

Mulan coughed and said, "Are you from these parts? I've never seen you before."

He laughed and said, "How rude of me! I'm Kuan Ming, and my family just moved up here today. And I have the honor of addressing..."

"Fa Mulan," she said.

Kuan Ming's eyes suddenly brightened and he said, "Surely not the brave Fa Mulan who killed the notorious Shan Yu and saved China?"

"Well, yes, that's me." What was wrong with her heart?

"Then the honor if even greater!" Ming smiled, showing his sparkling teeth. Mulan blushed.

Soon, the two were talking affably as they waited for the rain to settle. Kuan Ming came from another city and was the son of a very wealthy jewel merchant. He also had distinguished blood. His grandfather had been one of the lords of court, and Ming's blue blood certainly was displayed on his features. Mulan had never seen a man so comely.

When the rain stopped, Ming walked Mulan home and ask for her permission to call. Mulan, lost in the mist of romantic thrills, readily gave him permission and sent him home a happy man.

Copyright © SwordSkill 2000