*and it continues still! -- the gang is busy running like mad, thanks to Legato's mind control tricks, from the calmly walking and singing Rem. Despite the fact that the group is almost sprinting, they are never able to get more than twenty feet away from her. Weird that*
{Dominique} I'm telling you, we should just all jump her right now!
{Midvalley} Jeepers, running is really painful right now....
{Eriks} .....
{Midvalley} Because of the shoes! The shoes!
{Zazie} Reah right.
*they all go running inside of the whore house, -- Wolfwood and Zazie manage to break away long enough to barricade the front door with at least ten different pieces of furniture before joining the group again -- through the library and into the hidden hallway Legato and Midvalley had somehow found before. They stop once inside, panting*
{Wolfwood} Like, I think we lost her.
{Eriks} I hope s--wait, no I don't! REEEEE--*gets a hand clasped over his mouth by Wolfwood*
{Wolfwood} Sshh!! You don't want to bring her in here, do you?!
*Eriks nods and Wolfwood sweatdrops*
{Legato} It seems we've stumbled into the ghost's lair.
*he motions around and the gang turns, noticing then a Porta Plant, about five giant bags all labeled '100% Pure Red Geranium Petals', some large fans and lyric sheets to 'Sound Life'*
{Wolfwood} Zoinks.
{Midvalley} Why the hell would anyone need that many flower petals?
{Dominique} I don't know, Daphne. But there is a way we can find out.
{Legato} Split up and search for clues?
{Dominique} *nods* Right.
{Eriks} Didn't we just do that?!
{Legato} Not in here. Eriks, Chapel, Zazie; you three go over to that dark corner where we won't be able to see you. We'll look around here.
{Eriks} Whatever happened to the 'trapping the ghost' idea?
{Legato} We'll get to that later.
{Eriks} But... but... you already know she's not really a ghost, we're in her little secret hidey-hole here where we know she'll probably come back to... so why don't we just set up the trap now?
{Legato} Later, I said. Now go.
*Eriks, Wolfwood and Zazie are all forcibly marched off to their dark corner*
{Wolfwood} This sucks, man.
{Zazie} Rou red it.
{Eriks} Why the hell does he talk like that?
*elsewhere....*
{Rem} *evil chuckle* I almost have him....
{Mysterious Shadowy Figure Who's Not Eriks Who in Turn is Not Vash} Hai! This plan is perfect!
{Rem} It is, isn't it?
{Mysterious Shadowy Figure Who's Not Eriks Who in Turn is Not Vash} Definitely!
{Rem} Hmf hmf hmf.... I shall have you one way or another.... Vash the Stampede.
*back with the group again, Eriks sneezes*
{Wolfwood} Bless you.
{Eriks} Thanks. Hey, what's that?
{Wolfwood} Like, it looks like just a mysterious old trunk to me.
{Zazie} Reepy.
{Eriks} What?
{Wolfwood} 'Creepy'.
{Eriks} Oh. Let's open it!
{Wolfwood} No way! What if there's a ghost or a disembodied head in there? Or a bunch of spiders?
{Eriks} I _like_ spiders! *pauses* But not disembodied heads. Or most ghosts. Or hot dogs for that matter. But we won't know unless we look! *he opens the trunk, revealing a single piece of paper* .... Now that's just a waste of space.
{Wolfwood} It looks like a receipt. *he picks it up out of the trunk and reads it aloud* 'BDN's Wig Rentals : One Rem Saverem'.
{Eriks} I guess this means she really isn't a ghost, like Fred said.
{Zazie} Rost?!
{Eriks} Isn't, isn't! .... oh great, now I'm starting to understand him. I must be going crazy.
{Zazie} Rehehehehehe!
*with the other three, there seems to be a problem with something in the script*
{Legato} Do it.
{Dominique} But it's so stupid....
{Legato} It's in the script and thusly His will. You will obey.
{Dominique} But.... *long suffering sigh* Fine. *she turns and points to what looks like a solid iron rectangular room with a single door. There seem to be no windows or other means of escape other than the one heavy door* Hey, we haven't looked in there for clues yet!
{Midvalley} Golly, you're right!
*Legato, Dominique and Midvalley go running inside the iron room. Once they are all inside, the door slams shut, locking them inside*
{Dominique} Jeepers, that was unexpected. [I'm starting to buy into all this "life is hell" crap... really, someone kill me now.]
{Legato} [After this is over, I'll consider it.]
{Dominique} [.....]
{Midvalley} You know, it's really stuffy in here....
{Dominique} .... dammit, don't you two start anything! I'm still in here! Hey! HEY!! Stop it! *bangs on the door* Someone! HELP! HELP!!
*someone has apparently heard Dominique's pleas for help.... a trap door opens suddenly from the ceiling of the room and a long rope ladder is hung down, much to Legato and Midvalley's disappointment*
{Legato} Now we can search for more clues.
*well maybe only Midvalley's. The three climb out of the room to it's little iron roof and down it's little iron side. It seems the entire room was just a huge box with a door placed randomly inside the ghost's lair*
{Midvalley} Well that was pointless.
*back in the dark corner...*
{Eriks} Did you hear someone scream just a moment ago?
{Wolfwood} It's probably just Daphne.
*suddenly, the air is pierced with "Soooo.... Mitsu-me no yoru ni...."*
{Wolfwood} .... I think it's time to run again. *Zazie nods in agreement*
{Eriks} Do we have to?
{Wolfwood} It's this or getting forced to do it by Legato so--
{Eriks} So there's really no choice.
{Wolfwood} You catch on quick.
*they run screaming to the other three*
{Wolfwood and Eriks} GHOST!!
{Zazie} ROST!!
{Eriks} Roast?
{Wolfwood} Ghost.
{Eriks} Oh.
{Legato} Did you find any clues?
{Wolfwood} Now isn't the time for that! That creepy singing has started up again!
{Midvalley} Another chase scene?! Oh man....
{Zazie} Ray!
{Wolfwood} *sigh* All we found was a wig receipt anyways.
{Dominique} *snaps her fingers* Jinkies, then I've got it! The key to this mystery!
{Legato} Which means....
{Eriks} Which means?
{Dominique} It be ghost trapping time, ya'll. Now come on, here's the plan.... *they form a little huddle, whispering*
{Off Screen Voice of Rem} Nami no ko o kishibe ni shibuki o ageru.... Sound liiife....
---
- end chapter four
dun dun DUN!!! What will happen to our heroes (?) next?! Find out in the next chapter of the always exciting, always corny, always bizarre -- Zazie-Doo!
{Zazie} Zazie-Sazie-Dooooo!!
{Gray the Ninelives} ..................
By the way, the little bit about the solid iron room actually did happen in a Scooby Doo episode where Fred, Velma and Daphne all went charging into one looking for clues (they were then locked in by the Ghost of the Day. What a surprise). Really, who the hell goes into what's basically a big iron box looking for clues instead of looking around where all the evidence seems to be? So I added that in just because.
