Legal: The characters of Ranma ½ were created by the great Rumiko Takahashi.
I am using them without permission, hopefully for the purpose of entertaining someone. If anyone who has a right to sue me has that desire, I have almost no money.
C&C is appreciated, you can contact me at brenda02@sprynet.com. And if you want to see the earlier parts of this and my other stories, you can find them at http://home.sprynet.com/~brenda02/Keith/Animeff.htm
--------

A Ranma 1/2 Fanfict
Surreal Genius
By Brendan O'Donnell
Part Eight

Ranma opened his eyes and glanced at the steel reinforced speakers that were halfway through playing a very percussion heavy version of Beethoven's ninth symphony. "I had to build this thing didn't I" Ranma mumbled as he rose to his feet and walked to the wall opposite the speakers. Using the small keypad in the wall he turned the wakeup system off. "Oh yes, 'don't worry mom, I've built something to make sure I wouldn't be late for school again.'" He shook his head.

"So, what's Shampoo done with your room?" Nabiki casually asked as she looked over her bento at Ranma. He and the two Tendo sisters were sitting under the tree.
Akane slowed her eating and leaned forward slightly.
"I wouldn't know." Ranma casually commented as he inhaled his own bento. "I had things to do in the lab." Opening a can of soda, he began gulping it down.
Akane glanced from Ranma to Nabiki with a slight frown. "By the way Ranma, I was thinking about getting some Kendo pointers from your Mom."
With a spray of liquid, Ranma started coughing.
Blinking Akane asked, "Something wrong?"
"Um, why were you thinking about asking my mom about Kendo?"
"Well, she did say that she taught Noriko about the sword so she ought to be pretty good, right?"
"Well, now. Mostly."
"Is there something wrong with your mother Ranma?" Nabiki asked.
Ranma considered a moment. "Ok," he said quietly. "I want your word that you'll never tell anyone what I'm about to say. Or at least not anyone who might say a word about it to mom." He took a deep breath.
"Ok," Akane responded uncertainly.
"Sounds interesting." Nabiki responded with a grin. "I'll keep it a secret."
Ranma glanced at the pair. "OK. At the moment Mom is pretty good. Except with drawing it. And as long as she stays calm. Come to think of it her footwork tends to go whenever she moves faster than a slow walk.
"Ok, according to Grandpa, Mom's family has been professional sword polishers since some long ago legendary thing. Mom has always been a little too interested in swords. She's been fascinated by them, and by Samurai Movies. Of course Gramps didn't like it and forbade her from studying any sort of fighting technique. That didn't keep her from peeping at the practice sessions of the local Kendo Dojo and trying to copy their moves and the ones from the movie anytime she was alone." Ranma shook his head.
"And then when she was fifteen someone tried to break into their house."
Flashback
In the unlit workroom on the ground floor of her families' house, Nodoka carefully picked up the sword. It was a newly forged blade that her father had been finishing for three days. She smiled as she felt the hilt she had helped her mother make. With an excited giggle she struck a quick pose. "Wow."
From the front there was a quiet crash of glass breaking. Nodoka looked to the front of the shop. "Burglars?" she commented fearfully. She glanced at the sword she was holding. "Wait, if I can protect the shop. . ."
She purposely strode toward the doorway. Crack. "Oww," she whispered as she released the sword with her right hand so she could rub her shin, which had just banged into the stool where her father sat above the main polishing stone.

In the front two young men in black snuck into the entryway. "Idiot," one whispered, "What if they heard you!"
"Ah, sorry," the other replied, lifting a hand to rub the back of his head. "So, we keep to the plan?"
"I'll try upstairs, you check down. You did remember your flashlight, right?"
With a grin the second thief held up a metal flashlight. With a flourish he slid the switch to the on position. The bulb stayed dark. Frowning he looked closer at the item.
The first thief grabbed the flashlight from the second. He glanced at it a moment, considering it's weight. "Batteries?"
A sweatdrop forming on his head, the second thief laughed nervously.
The lights turned on.
Both thieves turned their heads to the doorway where a young woman in a Kimono stood. She was about 15 years old with her black hair pinned back in a very traditional style. She was holding a Kitana in her right hand, and brought her left hand back from the light switch to join its grip on the hilt.
"Hold villains! I Nodoka Yotsuya shall not allow you to. . . to. . . I wouldn't let you rob Papa!" She started advancing, holding the sword unsteadily before her as she moved forward with a slight limp.
The two thieves looked at her, and started backing away. "Hey," the first commented, "Stay calm, there's no need to get violent, we'll just be going, no harm done. . ."
"Wait!" Nodoka said, accelerating slightly. Then she tripped. "WAAAH!!" Stumbling forward she waved the sword in a frantic effort to regain her balance. She tripped, and only the impact of the swords forward thrust allowed her to stop on one knee rather than sprawled on the ground.
One of the would be thieves screamed, and pushed himself back into the wall, his attention completely focused on the sword that was struck into the wall, just over an inch below the point where his legs came together. He reached a frantic hand down to feel at his crotch. *Not hurt. Thank you Kami-Sama!*
"WE GIVE UP!"
end Flashback
Akane looked at Ranma.
"Hey, that's what Grandpa said, at least that's how he put all the accounts and the physical evidence together. Big fan of Sherlock Holmes, Grandpa." Ranma paused. "Anyway, He was even more adamant about Mom not studying Kendo, but with the way she glossed it over in her mind, it just convinced her that she had a natural gift for swordsmanship. And with no lessons, she never had anything to challenge that belief. And when Dad married her, he always tended to just act like she was as good as she thought she was and steer her away from actually using it on anyone.
"Then when Noriko was starting to get old enough to start thinking about training, mom thought it would be great to give her the chance she had never had. And that was what made dad admit that he'd been lying about how he thought of her sword style. That was the biggest fight they've ever gotten into. But in the end, Dad wound up taking Mom, and sparing with her until they could work her swordsmanship into something practical."
"So is your mom any good with her sword?" Nabiki said.
"Well, as long as she doesn't get to excited, which is a bit of a problem considering how she acts around swords in general. And Dad's never really tried to do much with her sword drawing. If she ever tries to draw the sword fast, try to keep out of the line of fire in case she doesn't grip it tightly enough."
"So I you don't think I should ask her for lessons." Akane commented.
"Well as long as you don't ask about Sword drawing you should be safe. And it's the best way to get on mom's good side." Ranma leaned forward conspiratorially. "According to Grandpa, the real reason she became so interested in him is because she wanted to polish his sword. Not that stuff about him peeping on her in the public baths."
Nabiki looked at him. "Don't take this the wrong way, but the better I know your parents the harder it is to decide which of them is crazier."
Ranma glanced back at her and grinned. "If you want to get more info, be ready to say something about your dad, I'm sure there's something beyond the whole engagement obsession."

A brown haired figure in a boys school uniform walked confidently down the streets of Nerima. He paused and scowled at the girl who was peering into a window to his left. "Having fun?"
The girl turned, and skipped to his side, grabbing his arm. "Aw, isn't aren't you having a good time?"
The boy gingerly sepperated the girl from his arm. "Will you not do that!?" Shaking his head, he added, "We really ought to call this off before we start at Furinkan."
"Oooh! Does that mean your ready to admit you loose?"
"NO WAY! . . . That is, I was just offering you the chance to call it a draw so we don't. . . You know."
The girl smirked, and struck a confident, yet very cute pose. "I am the best. And that's worth a lot to me, Ukyo-san."

Shampoo looked around her nervously. "This too-too strange." She at Noriko who was looking at a keypad beside a large steel door.
"It was a gift," Norkio responded, shining an oddly tinted light onto the keys. She nodded to herself as she considered the patern of fingerprints.
"Norkio have strange idea of gift."
Noriko paused to look over her shoulder at Shampoo. "Martial arts construction. Building a small complex fifty feet underground is a few hours work for them." Nodding to herself, she punched in a six diget code. The door quietly opened. "Same password."