[Full screen shot of Asaba's room. It would be more appropriate to a
heroin addict than a high-school heartthrob. A single naked light bulb
hangs precariously from the wall. A dirty futon is flush against the
back wall, under a window with no drapes or Venetian blinds. There is
no other furniture, save for a small chair and a rickety table covered
with papers, possibly homework, at left, a laundry basket and small,
overflowing trash can, right, and a TV at the end of the futon. The
floor is littered with miscellaneous rubbish.]

[Close up in turn on the major classes of rubbish: dirty clothes; what
appear to be men's health magazines; a pile of leftover Hideaki Asaba
Dinner Show brochures; old takeout boxes; etc. ad lib.]

[Close up on peeling wallpaper.]

[Close up on a stain on the floor that might be a cigarette burn.]

[Close up on another stain on the floor that might be blood.]

[Close up on the TV. It is a very old model, with "rabbit ear" antennae
and dials for adjusting channel and volume. The famed body-board is
propped up on its left side.]

[Shot of SD Kano, drawn crudely in pencil, freaking out, her eyes
swirls]

[SFX: Dramatic booming noise.]

Kano: EEEEEEK!

[Close up of Normal Asaba's face in right profile, looking down a bit,
presumably at Kano.]

Asaba: What?

[Cut back to the full screen shot of Asaba's room.]

Kano: [VO] Oh my _God!_ _This_ is your room?

Asaba: [VO] Yippers. This is the Hideaki Asaba Penthouse of Love.

[Cut to the view from the (dingy) window. The back of the house is as
depressing as the front, with an overflowing dumpster immediately
behind the tenement and a view of a not-terribly-much-better street
beyond.]

Kano: [VO; horrified] How can you live in a place like this?

[Close up on a backyard in the street beyond. A big, vicious looking
black dog, perhaps a stray, is barking at God knows what.]

Asaba: [VO] You get used to it. Plus it's all I can afford. [beat; he
might sigh] Yes, I live in a shithole. Living alone isn't as glamorous
as it sounds, trust me.

[Cut back to Normal Asaba's face, now front view. He looks a little
puzzled.]

Asaba: How did you get here, anyway? Kind of dangerous by yourself,
isn't it?

[Cut back to the full screen shot of Asaba's room, except now Kano is
in the foreground, her front to the screen, her hands on her hips,
fixing Asaba (off camera) with a firm look.]

Kano: [firmly] This will _not_ do.

[SD Kano suddenly starts putting the room into some semblance of order,
as jerkily and comically as possible: collecting the dirty clothes and
putting them in the laundry basket; organizing the magazines and
putting them into neat piles for want of shelf space; organizing the
papers on the desk; shining the window with a dirty shirt; dusting the
TV with same; and finally putting the takeout boxes into trash bags
pulled from hammer-space.]

[Shot of the back wall of the tenement, the dumpster at back, now
drawn, however, in a very simple, comical fashion. The dog is now
nosing around by the dumpster. The window opens and the trash bags fall
out the window, hitting the dog on the head. It barks in protest.]

[Cut back to Normal Kano in front of the room, dusting her hands off
and smiling, satisfied. The room still looks like a slum, but at least
now it's tidier.]

Kano: There, that's much better.

[Full-length shot of Asaba at the door, just staring. He is in a white
t-shirt and jeans. He blinks.]

Asaba: Uh, thanks. I was getting around to that, honest.

[Cut back to Normal Kano, still beaming, her hands now folded.]

Kano: No prob.

[Shot of Kano and Asaba from the left wall, so Kano is looking up at
Asaba from left, and Asaba is at right.]

Asaba: Uh huh...so why are you here again?

[Kano suddenly goes SD, starts to fidget, seems to have forgotten]

Kano: Oh...yes...heh heh heh...why am I here?...good question,
that...[points finger in the air] Oh yeah!

[Close up of Kano's hands holding up the lunch box to offer it to
Asaba.]

Kano: [VO] I thought I'd bring you some dinner.

Asaba: [VO] Dinner? [beat] Oh. Okay. Thanks.

[Close up on Asaba's hands cradling the lunch box. One hand moves to
open the lunch box. It is full of gravy and cheese covered fries.]

[Close up on SD Asaba's face, looking down at the poutine, puzzled. He
might blink once or twice. A question mark appears above his head.]

[Close up on Normal Asaba's face. He looks up, towards Kano (off
camera).]

Asaba: [a bit unnerved] What is _this_ stuff?

[Close up on Kano's head and shoulders. She is smiling, expectant.]

Kano: [cheerfully] It's called poutine.

[Cut back to Asaba's face.]

Asaba: [puzzled] It's called what?

[Cut back to Kano's face.]

Kano: Pou...tine. It's a Québécois dish.

[Cut back to Asaba's face.]

Asaba: Kay-bay-huh?

[Cut back to Kano's face.]

Kano: From Quebec. [beams even more] Go on, try it.

[Cut to Asaba's left profile from waist up.]

Asaba: [tentatively] I'll try anything once, I guess...

[Cut back to Kano's face. She's now blushing.]

Kano: Ooh! I like that attitude!

[Cut to Asaba's left profile from waist up. He picks up a fry and
slowly brings it to his mouth. Then:]

[Cut to a front view of Asaba. He looks overjoyed. A Quebec flag rises
behind him.]

[SFX: Generic fanfare.]

Asaba: It's...it's DELICIOUS!

[Cut to full-length of SD Kano. She giggles.]

Kano: Actually, it should be cheese curds, not grated cheese, but they
didn't have any curds at the deli, so I had to make do...is it okay
then?

[Asaba suddenly jumps on Kano, rubbing himself on her like he would on
Arima. Kano blushes and cheers up immensely.]

Kano: [to Asaba; false modesty] Ooh! Asaba, this is so sudden...

[Close up on SD Kano's face.]

Kano: [thinking; creepy] Kickass! It worked better than I thought!

Asaba: [still in raptures, not listening] Oh, my culinary perspective
has been so broadened! I feel so loved...!

Kano: [appearing to remember something] Oh! I almost forgot!

[Close up of her (normal) face.]

Kano: Asaba? Does your TV get TV Tokyo?

[Shot of front view of Asaba on one knee in front of her (though he's
let her go by now). He blink again.]

Asaba: Huh? Oh. Yeah, sure. Most days, anyway.

[Cut to the TV, which is showing a brown-haired, fairly pretty girl,
holding a mike.]

Announcer: [VO; baritone, as inane as humanly possible] "The family
experimented on my brother!" Next Mizusu!

[The TV cuts to what appears to be an "eyecatch" commercial break still
from a cartoon. At upper left is the head of Terrance, a brown-haired
boy; at lower right is the head of Phillip, a fair-haired boy. The
character designs are extremely simple, the heads being basically ovals
cut in half through the middle with eyes drawn in the top half, and
bits of color added for hair. Across the screen is written TERRANCE AND
PHILLIP SPECIAL, LIVE FROM MONTREAL.]

Announcer: [VO; tenor, but just as inane] Now, it's back to the
Terrance and Phillip Special, Live from Montreal!

[Cut to SD Kano, left, and SD Asaba, right, sitting at the head of the
futon. Asaba is munching poutine from the box. Kano is looking
thrilled.]

Kano: Oh yes oh yes oh yes! I've been dying to see this one! This one's
famous!

Asaba: [his mouth full] Huh.

[Cut to Terrance, left, and Phillip, right, apparently buried up to
their necks in a snowdrift. The only clue that they're actually in
Montreal and not the Arctic is a sign at extreme right, poking out of
the snow, that should be an American stop sign but reads ARRÊT in
French, not STOP. The tops of Terrance and Phillip's heads bounce up
and down as they talk.]

Phillip: [annoying imitation of an upper-class English schoolboy]
Terrance, the weather in Montreal in February sucks Jacques Parizeau's
ass!

Terrance: [almost indistinguishable from Phillip's, just as annoying]
That's a lot of ass, Phillip!

[They both laugh in unison, as irritatingly as possible.]

Phillip: Well, it's true! I'd rather be in Edmonton!

Terrance: Why the fuck would you want to go to Edmonton, Phillip? That
city is gayer than Stockwell Day! Why do you think Stock went to
Ottawa?

[They both laugh.]

Phillip: The point is I don't like freezing my ass off in a snowdrift,
Terrance! At least in Alberta they have plenty of home heating fuel!

Terrance: So what, Phillip? We have plenty of natural gas right here!

[Terrance shuts his eyes, shifts in the snow a bit, and farts loudly.
They both laugh.]

[Cut back to SD Kano and SD Asaba. Kano is laughing almost as
irritatingly as Terrance and Phillip. Asaba is staring, completely
lost.]

Asaba: I'm not getting any of this at all.

[Caption: MORAL: NEVER SHOW NEWBIES _URUSEI YATSURA_]

Kano: [pointing at the screen, trying to explain] They've got a lot of
oil and gas and stuff in Alberta, my dad says. It's kind of like Texas
with snow. Edmonton's in Alberta. It's kind of a cow town, I guess.

Asaba: [still confused] Who are these people they're talking about? And
what's with the flapping heads? Creeping me out...

Kano: Oh, Jacques Parizeau's from Quebec. He's a fat butt, that's all
you need to know. The flapping heads is just the character design. Flow
with it.

[Caption: IRONY ALERT: THE VIEWS OF THE CHARACTERS ARE NOT NECESSARILY
THOSE OF THE AUTHOR. THE AUTHOR IS ACTUALLY FOND OF STOCKWELL DAY]

Asaba: What about the other guy? Is he gay or something?

[Caption: NO, NOT LIKE THAT, YOU PERVERTS]

Kano: Nah, he's just way too purdy for his own good. He, like, posed in
wetsuits and stuff. He's a politician. Ottawa's the capital of Canada.
I read on the net that he's actually real religious and he doesn't like
gay people, or something.

[Close up on (now normal) Asaba's face. He seems to be thinking about
that.]

Asaba: Huh.

[Beat; there might be another irritating laugh from Terrance and
Phillip. He looks to his left, towards Kano.]

Asaba: How do you know all this stuff anyway?

[SD Kano suddenly gets in his face, a superior grin on her face. Asaba
moves back, unnerved, gritting his teeth.]

[Caption: THE AUTHOR FOR HIS PART WATCHES CBC WINDSOR. GO AIR FARCE!]

Kano: [her finger in the air; creepy] Isn't the Internet wonderful?

[Cut back to Terrance and Phillip, still in the snowdrift.]

Phillip: Everything about Quebec sucks ass, Terrance! I want to go to
Los Angeles where I can be a porn star! And it doesn't snow and people
don't kick your ass because you can't speak French!

Terrance: Never fear Phillip! We can fly there right now!

Phillip: I am not flying Air Canada, Terrance! That's a fate worse than
death!

Terrance: Don't be silly Phillip! I have a better idea!

[He pulls his hand out of the snow. Close up on his hand. In it is a
Styrofoam cup crammed with gravy covered French fries.]

Phillip: [off] What's that, Terrance?

Terrance: [off] Just a little something I picked up at the dépanneur,
mon ami!

[Cut back to SD Kano and SD Asaba. Kano is snickering expectantly.]

Kano: Oh yes. This is the good bit...

Asaba: What's a dépanneur?

Kano: A quickie-mart. [points at the screen] That's a bowl of poutine.

Asaba: [looking at his food] What I'm eating now?

Kano: Yipper!

[Cut back to Terrance and Phillip, still in the snowdrift. Terrance has
freed his other hand; he munches on the poutine for a moment.]

Terrance: [suddenly] Poutine Power!

[He lets off an enormous fart and flies off into the air and off
screen. Phillip looks up into the air after him.]

Phillip: Terrance! Wait for me!

[Now both SD Kano and SD Asaba are laughing irritatingly at the head of
the futon.]

Kano: [looking up to him] See? You're getting it now! See?

Asaba: [suddenly worried, looking at the poutine] Does it give you gas
that bad?

Kano: I don't think so...

[Cut back to the TV screen, far enough away that we can see the
bodyboard. The "eyecatch" is back on the screen.]

Announcer: [VO, from TV] Coming up on _Terrance and Phillip_, special
guest Nanami Kiryu, la Fillette Québécoise!

Asaba: [a bit worried suddenly] This is kind of crass, you know. Do
your folks let you watch this?

Kano: I got them all hooked. [titters] Yukino's a bigger fan than I am.

[During the following dialogue the TV should be heard more faintly in
the back ground, with occasional laughter from Terrance and Phillip ad
lib.]

[Shot of Normal Kano's and Normal Asaba's legs on the futon. Asaba's
hand puts down the lunch box in between them.]

Asaba: Thanks for the food.

[Shot from right profile of Normal Asaba leaning up against the wall,
his face turned to Kano to his left (off screen). He is smiling
gratefully.]

Asaba: The truth is I've never had a girl bring me dinner before.

[Shot from left profile of Normal Kano leaning up against the wall, her
face to Asaba to her right (off screen). She is blushing.]

Kano: Oh no?

[Cut back to Asaba. He is no longer smiling.]

Asaba: Seriously, I really appreciate it. I don't have a lot of money
right now, so I haven't been eating that great as it is...

[Cut back to Kano. Her face has fallen; she is looking at her lap,
thinking about that.]

Kano: Huh. [beat] So, like, you haven't eaten all day?

[Cut back to Asaba.]

Asaba: That was my first decent meal in two days.

[Cut back to Kano. She is looking towards Asaba again, looking
horrified.]

Kano: Oh my God! That's terrible, Asaba!

[Cut back to Asaba. He is no longer looking at Kano; his eyes are shut,
his head bowed.]

Asaba: Yep, I guess it is.

[Shot of the inside of the door, on which hangs a Hideaki Asaba Dinner
Show poster.]

Asaba: [off] I'm one of those lucky people who get to choose between
eating and having a roof over their head. Of course I'm behind on the
rent too, as usual. The manager probably told you that, right?

Kano: [off] Actually, yeah.

[Shot of the ceiling, where the bulb hangs precariously.]

Asaba: [off] Figures. She'll tell anyone who'll listen who's behind on
their rent.

[Front view of (normal) Kano and Asaba from the end of the futon. Asaba
is now lying flat on the futon, while Kano, who is still sitting up,
looks down at him.]

Asaba: It's not like I can even go to Soichiro's place and bum food off
him any more. That's what I used to do when things got tight. His folks
were never there, so I could hang out as much as I liked. Now that his
dad's quit his job at the hospital, Soichiro's folks are there all the
time, so I can't go over as often. [beat] It always pissed Soichiro
off,
but he let me come in and eat his food anyway. _And_ he covered for me.
He's pretty cool that way.

Kano: I thought your dad sent you money, though...

Asaba: Yeah. Not enough, though. You don't understand, my dad hates my
guts. I don't want to talk about it right now...[yawns; he might
stretch a bit]...I'm full for once and I want to enjoy it while I can.

[Beat.]

Kano: You know, you really shouldn't be living like this.

[View from above of Asaba, his hands tucked behind his head, staring at
the ceiling.]

Asaba: Nobody should be living like this, kid. People spend their whole
lives living like this, right here. Just hope and pray you never have
to. I'll tell you this, it beats the street any day.

[Front view of Kano and Asaba from the end of the futon.]

Kano: Asaba! You can't stay here! This place isn't fit for a pig!

Asaba: [dismissive] Yeah, well, find me a place that is fit for a pig
and we'll talk, okay?

[Beat.]

Kano: [gently] Say.

[View from above of Asaba, his hands tucked behind his head, staring at
the ceiling. He looks up to his left, at Kano.]

Asaba: What is it?

[Front view of Kano, looking down to her right towards Asaba (off
camera).]

Kano: Do you want to come live with us?

[View from above of Asaba, looking up at Kano, a surprised look on his
face.]

Asaba: With who?

[Front view of Kano looking straight to the right at Asaba (who will
have just sat up).]

Kano: With us. With the Miyazawas. We're your friends. You can stay as
long as you like. It wouldn't be a problem.

[Shot of Asaba from left, who has propped himself up on his right arm,
looking at Kano.]

Asaba: You don't say.

[Front view of Kano looking expectantly at Asaba.]

Kano: So, you want to?

[Beat.]

[Asaba slumps back down on the futon, his left hand on his forehead,
his eyes shut, and starts laughing loudly.]

[Close of Kano's face, looking upset.]

Kano: Hey, what's so funny?

[Close up of SD Asaba's face, wiping a tear from his eye.]

Asaba: [recovering] You have no fucking clue, do you? Do you have any
idea what your dad'd say? You know what he's like!

[Cut to Kano and Asaba standing in a field of lilies.]

[CAPTION: DRAMATIZATION]

Asaba: Ah! What kindness! How can I possibly refuse you?

Kano: [puckering up] Kiss me you fool!

[They embrace.]

Asaba: Oh Kano...

Kano: [breathily] Oh Asaba...

[Suddenly SD Mr. Miyazawa, wearing his "Japan's Greatest Dad" shirt and
with the _otoko_ "man" character written on his forehead, falls out of
the sky and lands on their heads, knocking both to the ground.]

Mr. Miyazawa: Over my dead body!

[Mr. Miyazawa pulls Asaba to his feet and shakes him around.]

Mr. Miyazawa: No way in hell is any mere man living under the same roof
as my little princesses! If you want my Kano you'll have to fight me to
the death!

[Shot of SD Mr. Miyazawa, dressed in a Student Council outfit from
_Utena_ (or rather _Nanami_), at left, SD Asaba in Nanami's blue
fleurdelisé outfit, at right, and SD Kano, looking _very_ cute in a
blue Rose (or rather Lily) Bride outfit at center, standing in the
field of lilies. Mr. Miyazawa and Asaba are holding swords. Kano
affixes a rose to Mr. Miyazawa's lapel, then a lily to Asaba's, and
then stands back as they engage in swordplay as comically as possible.]

Mr. Miyazawa:
[ad lib.] Hoh! Hah! Thrust! Parry! Spin!
Asaba:

[The scene is pushed up off screen with one finger on the left hand by
SD Asaba, at right, who is explaining all this to SD Kano, left,
wagging his right index finger demonstratively.]

Asaba: ...and stuff. So you see, it probably wouldn't work out.

Kano: [genuinely surprised] What, you think?

[Cut to normal Asaba slumping back down on the futon, his left hand on
his forehead still, but no longer smiling.]

Asaba: Come on, Kano, what are your folks running anyway, some kind of
halfway house for teens or something? If I ever need one of those
there's one a couple of blocks from here, and I don't intend on going
there any time soon.

[View from below (from Asaba's viewpoint) of Kano looking down at
Asaba.]

Kano: But I just thought...

[Front view of Kano and Asaba from the end of the futon, Asaba lying
down, Kano sitting up and looking down towards him.]

Asaba: I know what you thought, and don't think I don't appreciate it,
but I can take care of myself, all right? [beat] I just choose not to.
[beat] Look, you don't understand, all right? A lot of this is my own
fault. My dad didn't throw me out, I left of my own free will. Of
course at the time I didn't know what I was in for, but that doesn't
matter now. I don't know why he keeps sending me money, even. [beat]
I'd actually have enough to live on if I was more careful with my cash
flow and I could hold a job for more than two weeks on end, but I can't
do either of those. When I actually have money to spare I end up
blowing it on things like body-boards and shit.

[Shot of the body-board leaning on the TV.]

Asaba: [off] I'll say this, though, it helps the TV reception.

Kano: [off] What about the Hideaki Asaba Dinner Show? Didn't you get
any money from that?

Asaba: [off] Yeah, some. 'Course, at the time I was even farther behind
on my rent than I am right now. It was either the Dinner Show or the
street. 'Sides, it was pretty easy work. [suddenly laughs] Come on.
Give me some credit for self-respect, all right?

[Beat.]

[On the TV Phillip farts loudly, and Terrance and Phillip fall over
laughing.]

Asaba: [off; going on] So, you see, I've done some pretty dumb things,
and so I've had to do some other dumb things to get myself out of it.

Kano: [off; hesitant] Did you ever steal stuff?

Asaba: [off; without shame] A few times, yeah. Nothing big, though.
Mostly shoplifted food from quickie-marts and stuff, when I was really
desperate. Wish I could say maintaining my girlish figure was more
effort than it was, but...[dismissing the subject] Look, point is, I
get by somehow.

[Cut back to Asaba's right profile, from waist up, lying on the futon.
His hands are back under his head, and he has resumed looking at the
ceiling.]

Asaba: Don't tell your sister this, but when Soichiro ran out on his
folks
New Year's Eve I offered to let him stay here. He's looked after me
enough, I'm gonna have to return the favor some time.

[View from below (from Asaba's viewpoint) of Kano looking down at
Asaba.]

Asaba: [off] I dunno. Maybe I just need someone around to tell me
what's what now and again. Soichiro's pretty good at that.

Kano: [looking concerned] Huh.

[SD Kano suddenly appears in an inset in the upper left of the screen,
grinning like mad.]

SD Kano: An opening!

[Cut back to Asaba's right profile, from waist up, lying on the futon,
his hands behind his head.]

Asaba: 'Course, he has your sis to set _him_ straight, that's probably
why he went to your place instead. [Beat.] Actually, I'm sure that's
why he went to your place instead. Your sis can set pretty much anyone
straight. [smiles, laughs a bit] She's weird. Crazy as hell one minute,
Mother Teresa the next...but she's cool.

[View from below (from Asaba's viewpoint) of Kano looking down at
Asaba. She is trying to smile and laugh a bit, but she clearly didn't
like what she heard somehow.]

Kano: Yeah. I hear that a lot...

[Cut back to Asaba's right profile, from waist up, lying on the futon,
his hands behind his head. He has turned his head to look in Kano's
direction.]

Asaba: Anyway, I can't hold a job to save my life. I lost my last job
two weeks ago, that's why I can't pay the rent. Wanna know how I lost
my job?

[View from below (from Asaba's viewpoint) of Kano looking down at
Asaba.]

Kano: How?

[Front view of Kano and Asaba from the end of the futon, Asaba lying
down, Kano sitting up and looking down towards him.]

Asaba: You gotta realize, I only got it because the boss's daughter
thought I was hot, and she begged and pleaded with her old man to give
me the job. I was okay at it, I guess--he never complained about my
work too much, anyway--but then I guess the daughter finally got up the
courage to ask me to be her boyfriend. Fact was I didn't find her very
attractive, so I, like a dumbass, said no. Of course I knew I'd only
got the job because she liked me, but I didn't think of that 'til it
was too late. [beat] Anyway, I guess she got pissed off and told her
old man--actually I still don't know what she told him, but I show up
for work one day and he chases me out, telling me that, quote, "if I
ever dared try anything funny," unquote, with his daughter again he'd
kill me with his bare hands. [beat] So like I said, I've done a lot of
dumb things.

Kano: [humphing a bit] That wasn't very nice. What she did, I mean. You
didn't have to go out with her.

Asaba: Well, _no_, technically I didn't, but if I had I'd have food
today. I could have gone out with her until I found another job or she
got tired of me, but like I said, I was a dumbass. See what I have to
deal with?

Kano: Oh. [beat] So why did you say no?

Asaba: I was a dumbass. [beat] Specifically? At school I'm always
getting asked for dates. I always say no, without thinking about it. I
just wasn't thinking.

[View from below (from Asaba's viewpoint) of Kano looking down at
Asaba. She has perked up a bit too much.]

Kano: So you don't have a girlfriend?

[Cut back to Asaba's right profile, from waist up, lying on the futon,
his hands behind his head. He has turned back to the ceiling.]

Asaba: Nope. None of them do anything for me, somehow.

[View from below of Kano looking down at Asaba.]

Kano: You don't say. Huh.

[SD Kano appears in her inset at upper left, grinning.]

SD Kano: Oh yes oh yes! Move in for the kill!

[Cut back to Asaba's right profile, from waist up, lying on the futon,
his hands behind his head. He has turned his head to look in Kano's
direction.]

Asaba: Surprised? [smiles] Bet you thought I had a whole harem or
something, huh?

[Cut to a shot of SD Asaba and SD Arima, dressed in togas, surrounded
on all sides by cute girls in Hokuei High uniforms.]

Girls: [VO; ecstatic] ASABA! ARIMA! MAKE US YOUR OWN!

Asaba: [VO] I was actually going to set up a harem with Soichiro...

[SD Yukino walks on screen, pulls a club out of hammer-space, clubs SD
Arima over the head and drags him off. SD Asaba starts to cry like a
baby.]

Asaba: [VO] ...but then Soichiro got himself an actual girlfriend, so I
kind of lost interest. It'd be no fun without him.

[Cut to front view of Kano's head and shoulders. She is covering her
mouth, stifling a laugh.]

Kano: [tittering] That's funny.

[SD Kano pops up in her inset, getting impatient.]

SD Kano: Well, what are you waiting for? Next question on the
checklist!

Kano: [to Asaba, a bit too cheerfully] So, like, there really isn't
anybody you like?

[View from above of Asaba, turning back to look at the ceiling.]

[Beat.]

Asaba: Yeah, actually there is.

[Still of close up of pencil drawing of Kano's face, looking
thunderstruck.]

[View from above of Asaba, looking at the ceiling.]

Asaba: Does that surprise you?

[Left profile of Kano. She has turned away from Asaba and taken to
staring at the end of the futon.]

[Front view of Kano. She slowly draws herself up into a fetal position,
looking miserable.]

Kano: Is she pretty?

[Beat.]

[Close up on Asaba's face. He seems to be hesitating, not sure how to
answer. At last, however, the uncertainty in his face seems to
dissolve.]

Asaba: The most beautiful girl I've ever met. [beat] The only one I
ever loved.

[Front view of Kano in her fetal position.]

Kano: She must be something else. [beat] Do I know her?

[Close up on Asaba's face.]

Asaba: Your sister knows her pretty well.

[Front view of Kano in her fetal position.]

Kano: Does she know you like her?

[Close up on Asaba's face.]

Asaba: Who? Your sis?

Kano: [off] No! The girl.

Asaba: Yeah, she knows. [beat] But it's kind of a secret. So I can't
tell you who it is either.

[Front view of Kano in her fetal position.]

Kano: Oh. Okay. [beat] But she doesn't like you back?

[Close up on Asaba's face.]

Asaba: No. But that isn't the point really.

[Front view of Kano and Asaba from the end of the futon, Asaba lying
down, Kano in her fetal position.]

Asaba: [narrative] I first met her in the first year of junior high.

[Fade out drone from TV. Dissolve to white.]

[White screen, blank except for a bar down the middle, in which is
drawn in black ink a full-length picture of a girl standing in a summer
school uniform, her hands folded in front of her. She has black, wavy
shoulder-length hair; however, she has no facial features, except for a
kind smile. For the duration of this scene all drawings are in black
ink, without any other color but black unless specifically stated,
except for blushes, which are in red. However, shading may be used
where appropriate.]

[Close up (within the bar) of the girl, still smiling, from the waist
up.]

Asaba: [VO] Everybody loved her. [laughs a bit] All the boys, anyway.
She was friends with every girl in the school too.

[White screen, this time with a horizontal bar, wide enough to show a
shot of a well appointed house, similar to the Arimas' perhaps.]

Asaba: [VO] Her parents were very rich. I don't know what she was doing
at our school.

[Vertical bar. Still of the girl cheerfully chatting with some other
girls and boys; they themselves are all wearing dark winter uniforms,
while she keeps her summer uniform. None of these have any facial
features either, except for smiles.]

Asaba: [VO] No doubt about it, she was queen of the school. She even
looked like a princess.

Kano: [VO; reflective] Sounds a bit like Yukino.

Asaba: [VO] Yeah, I suppose you could say that.

[Vertical bar. Full length shot of Asaba, in a dark winter uniform,
which he will wear throughout the scene.]

[Vertical bar. Close up on Asaba from the waist up. He, alone of all
the characters in this scene, has a complete face. It is not quite the
face we know, however; it is younger, softer, perhaps as it was at age
13, 14 at most.]

Asaba: [VO] I fell in love with her the moment I saw her.

[Vertical bar. Close up on girl's head and shoulders.]

[Caption at right, small, black type: "Hello, Hideaki. How are you
today?" Her mouth does not move.]

[Vertical bar. Still of Asaba standing at left, looking thrilled but
apprehensive, blushing a bit (in red), his hand behind his head, in
front of the girl, right, perhaps in a classroom.]

[Caption at left, small, black type: "Oh, okay, I guess..."

[Caption at right: "Have you eaten your lunch yet?"]

Asaba: [VO] I don't know why, but she paid more attention to me than to
most.

[Vertical bar. Close up of Asaba from waist up, blushing.]

[Vertical bar. Close up of the girl, kindly smiling.]

[Caption at right: "I have a bit too much, I think. I thought we might
share it."]

Asaba: [VO] Call it noblesse oblige or whatever, but she sort of took
me under her wing. I guess I looked like I needed it.

[Horizontal bar. Shot of Asaba's head as he walks through a crowd of
completely faceless people, shaded in dark gray.]

Asaba: [VO] Even then I was alone.

[Horizontal bar. Still of Asaba and the girl sharing the lunch.]

Asaba: [VO] At any rate, we became friends, and I got to know her
fairly well.

[Horizontal bar. Still of Asaba and the girl sitting on a patch of
grass, perhaps a school lawn, chatting and laughing.]

Asaba: [VO] The more I saw of her the more I loved her...

[Horizontal bar. Close up of head and shoulders of Asaba, left, and the
girl, right. They are laughing at some funny story of Asaba's; Asaba is
gesticulating ad lib., while the girl covers her mouth with her right
hand to stifle her laughter.]

[Caption at top left: "Ha ha ha!"]

[Caption at bottom right: "Oh my! I hadn't heard _that_!"

Asaba: [VO] ...and it was obvious she was genuinely fond of me.

[Horizontal bar. Still from waist up of two boys in winter uniforms
whispering to each other and pointing at something off camera. The boy
at left looks disturbed; the boy at right is laughing, as if it were a
joke.]

[Caption at top left: "That better not be what it looks like, man."]

[Caption at bottom right: "Nah, couldn't be. What, you jealous? Ha ha
ha!"]

Asaba: [VO] I guess it got to the point where people started to talk.

[Vertical bar. Close up of girl from waist up, still smiling. Her hair
might be blowing in the breeze.]

Asaba: [VO] But if it bothered her, she never let on to me...

[Vertical bar. Close up of Asaba, blushing but smiling himself.]

Asaba: [VO] ...and I know it never bothered me.

[Horizontal bar. Asaba, left, blushing, hand behind head, stands before
the girl, apparently asking something. Her mouth is missing from her
face.]

Asaba: [VO] Somehow, though, I had to find out if she loved me too.

[Horizontal bar. Close up on Asaba, still blushing.]

Asaba: [VO] Call me naive if you like, but for some reason I was sure
the best place to do it would be at my boarding house.

[Caption at bottom left: "Would you like to come to my home on
Sunday?"]

Asaba: [VO] So, instead of asking her on a date, which I could not
afford anyway, I asked her over to my place, several times.

[Vertical bar. Close up on the girl's head and shoulders. Her mouth is
in an O; there is a tinge of regret in the expression.]

[Caption at right: "I'm afraid I can't. Perhaps another time."]

Asaba: [VO] But she always said no...

[Vertical bar. Full length still of the girl, her back to the camera,
walking away.]

Asaba: [VO] ...so at last I quit asking her, sure she would never
agree...

[Vertical bar. Full length still of Asaba, his hands in his pockets,
black background (within the bar)]

Asaba: [VO] There was only one conclusion you could draw, that she
didn't like me after all, and that was that.

[Vertical bar. Shot of a black-and-white ink drawing of the inside of
Asaba's room. In the background, Asaba, still in uniform, is lying on
his futon.]

[Horizontal bar. Close up of Asaba from the waist up, lying on his
futon, his hands behind his head.]

[SFX: Knocking at the door.]

[Asaba turns to look.]

[Vertical bar. Asaba is standing inside the door, having opened it to
see who is there.]

Asaba: [VO] Then one winter evening...

[Vertical bar. Full length shot of the girl, in a beautiful white
kimono with a flower motif (the flowers shaded ad lib.).]

Asaba: [VO] ...there she was.

[Vertical bar. Close up of the two kneeling on the futon, Asaba at the
head (left), the girl at the foot (right).]

Asaba: [VO] She would not tell me the details, but apparently she had
had a falling out with her family, and she had run away.

[Horizontal bar. Shot of the girl's head and shoulders. Her mouth is
open in supplication.]

Asaba: [VO] She did not want to go home that night, so she had come to
me, because at least there she was sure she would be safe.

[Caption at top right: "I don't mean to impose, but may I stay here
tonight?"]

[Horizontal bar. Shot of Asaba's head and shoulders. He is blushing,
clearly not knowing what to do or say.]

[Caption at bottom left: "Of...of course! Stay as long as you like."]

[Vertical bar. The two sit at the head of the futon, apparently
watching TV.]

Asaba: [VO] We stayed up long into the night, watching TV...

[Vertical bar. Front view of the two sitting at the end of the futon.
The girl, left, is covering her mouth to stifle a laugh; Asaba is
cheering something on.]

Asaba: [VO] ...talking, laughing, having more fun than I thought was
humanly possible.

[Vertical bar. Close up of the shoulders of the two pressed close
together.]

Asaba: [VO] I should have been thinking indecent thoughts, but I
wasn't. I just felt more comfortable than I ever had in my life.

[Vertical bar. Close up of the girl's head; she apparently is looking
up at Asaba to ask a question. Her mouth is slightly open, slightly
smiling.]

[Caption at left: "What is it, Hideaki?"]

Asaba: [VO] Just having her there was enough. I wanted nothing else.

[Vertical bar. Close up of Asaba's head. He is blushing, smiling, his
mouth closed.]

[Caption at right: "Nothing really."]

Asaba: [VO] I had never been so happy.

[Vertical bar. Black background in the bar, in which is drawn or etched
in white a picture of the room. The girl is curled up demurely in the
futon, while Asaba is in the chair, still in his clothes, slumped
across the rickety table, fast asleep.]

Asaba: [VO] I gave her the futon and slept in the chair as best I
could.

[Vertical bar. The "negative" of the room has reverted to the
"positive" (black on white) with the coming of the day. Asaba is
standing just beside the chair, his back to the camera, while the girl,
still in her kimono, stands before him.]

Asaba: [VO] In the morning--or rather the early afternoon--my dream
ended.

[Vertical bar. Shot from waist up of the girl in her kimono. Her hair
is a bit mussed. Her mouth is open, apologetic.]

[Caption to right: "I really should go. My parents must be wondering
where I am."]

Asaba: [VO] She excused herself and prepared to leave.

[Vertical bar. Shot from waist up of Asaba, gently protesting.]

[Caption at left: "Do you really have to go? Are you sure you want to
go back?"]

Asaba: [VO] I asked her to stay longer, but she insisted...

[Vertical bar. Cut back to the girl. She is now smiling, reassuringly.]

[Caption at right: "It's all right. Don't worry about me. They're
probably worried sick. They're good people, really."]

[Vertical bar. Close up on the girl's head. She is smiling the same
smile.]

[Caption at right: "Thank you for everything. Goodbye now."]

Asaba: [VO] ...and she headed for the door.

[Horizontal bar. The girl passes Asaba and heads for the door.]

[Vertical bar. Close up on Asaba's face. He is shouting something at
the girl.]

[Caption at left: "WAIT!"]

[Vertical bar. Close up of Asaba grabbing the girl's wrist.]

[Vertical bar. Still of the girl from Asaba's perspective, turning
back, her mouth expressing surprise, if not shock.]

[Vertical bar. Still of Asaba from the girl's perspective, his face
pleading.]

[Caption at left: "Please, don't go. Stay with me."]

Asaba: [VO] I begged her not to go, but she wouldn't listen.

[Vertical bar. Close up of the girl's head and shoulders, her mouth
apprehensive.]

[Caption at right: "I have to go! We'll both get into trouble with my
parents if I don't!"]

Asaba: [VO] She insisted she had to go home.

[Vertical bar. Close up on Asaba's face. His expression is tender.]

Asaba: [VO] But I told her I didn't want her to go home, I wanted her
to stay with me.

[Caption at top left: "Forget about them. We'll take care of each other
from now on."]

[Caption at bottom left: "I want you to stay with me."]

Asaba: [VO] She did not seem to understand. Perhaps she had never
realized just what she meant to me.

[Vertical bar. Close of on the girl's face. Her mouth betrays
incomprehension.]

[Caption at top right: "What?"]

Asaba: [VO] I tried to explain why I thought we belonged together, but
still she did not understand.

[Vertical bar. Close up on Asaba's face.]

[Caption at top left: "You are like me. I have no family any more
either. We'll be each other's family."]

[Vertical bar. Close of on the girl's face. Her mouth now betrays
horror.]

[Caption at top right: "What are you talking about?"]

Asaba: [VO] There was only one way to make her understand.

[Horizontal bar. Close up of the bottom of Asaba's mouth. It mouths the
words:

[Caption at bottom: "I love you."]

[SFX: The sound of a person roughly hugging another.]

[Vertical bar. Full length shot of Asaba embracing the girl in her
kimono.]

[Vertical bar. Close up of Asaba and the girl from the waist up, Asaba
kissing the girl deeply. Her arms hang limp.]

Asaba: [VO] I took her in my arms and kissed her as deeply as I could.

[The girl's arms rise.]

[Vertical bar, black background. Close up of the girl's hands shoving
Asaba's body back.]

[SFX: A girl's scream.]

[Caption at left: "NO!"]

[Caption at right: "LEAVE ME ALONE!"]

[SFX: Someone slapping another's face.]

[Vertical bar, black background. Close up of Asaba's face, a stunned
expression on his face. His left cheek is reddening from being
slapped.]

Asaba: [VO] She shoved me away, slapped me hard, told me to let her
go...

[Vertical bar. Full length shot of the girl running out the door.]

Asaba: [VO] ...and she ran away crying.

[Vertical bar, black background. Asaba stands stunned, nursing his
cheek.]

Asaba: [VO] I did not stop her from leaving. I finally knew her true
feelings.

[Vertical bar, white background. Full length shot of the girl, now in a
dark winter uniform, books in her folded hands before her, a friendly
smile on her face as before.]

Asaba: [VO] The next day she greeted me at school, trying to act as if
nothing had happened.

[Caption at right: "Hello, Hideaki! How are you?"]

[Vertical bar. Close up on the girl's face. On closer inspection the
smile is not so much friendly as a mask of apprehension.]

Asaba: [VO] But it was clear she no longer trusted me. You could tell
how tense she became when I went near her.

[Horizontal bar. Still of Asaba and the girl eating lunch. The girl is
silent, on guard, no longer smiling.]

Asaba: [VO] She still let me stay around her, but she no longer made me
feel welcome.

[Horizontal bar. The girl is talking to another girl, at her left.]

[Caption at bottom left: "I never see you with Hideaki any more. Aren't
you friends any more? Did you have a fight?"

[Caption at top right: "What do you mean? I never really liked him that
much. I just felt sorry for him."]

[Horizontal bar. Asaba is in the foreground left, listening to the
girls in the background right.]

Asaba: [VO] Rather I was an embarrassment.

[Vertical bar, black background. Asaba sits curled in a fetal position
on the ground.]

Asaba: [VO] That should have been the end of the story, of our story.
For a while, it could have been the end of mine.

[Horizontal bar. Shot of Asaba's head as he walks through a crowd of
completely faceless people, shaded in dark gray. His head is hung, his
expression grim.]

Asaba: [VO] Somehow, though, I managed to stay alive, perhaps only
because I had not the inner strength to kill myself.

[Asaba looks up, to his right.]

Asaba: [VO] In any case, that wasn't the end of our story after all.
There was a twist that made for a surprise ending.

[Vertical bar. Full length shot of the girl in her summer uniform,
left, walking along, holding the hand of a boy in a summer uniform,
right. The boy has no facial features aside from a mouth; his most
distinguishing characteristic is short, red hair.]

[Vertical bar. Close up on the boy's head and shoulders. He is smiling
endearingly in the direction of the girl.]

Asaba: [VO] Eventually my princess found love of her own. It was, as
they say, a match made in heaven.

[Vertical bar. Close up on the girl's head and shoulders. She is
smiling endearingly in the direction of the boy.]

Asaba: [VO] It was obvious, even to me, how taken she was by him.

[Vertical bar. Still of the boy cheerfully chatting with some other
girls and boys; all are now in summer uniforms.]

Asaba: [VO] If my darling was the queen of my class, he was the king.
All the younger boys admired him, the older boys liked him, and all the
girls adored him. He was a perfect scholar and a great athlete.

[Vertical bar. Still of Asaba standing at a corner of a corridor,
glaring. He is still in his winter uniform.]

Asaba: [VO] I hated him.

[Horizontal bar. Shot of Asaba, right, standing behind the boy, left.]

Asaba: [VO] I thought him vain and superficial, unworthy of the praise
everybody lavished on him, least of all of my princess's love.

[Asaba taps the boy on the shoulder. The boy turns.]

[Caption at bottom left: "Hello! You must be Hideaki Asaba! Charmed!"]

Asaba: [VO] So one day I went up to him and I told him so.

[Vertical bar. Asaba looks down at the boy with disdain.]

[Caption at top right: "Everyone around here seems to think you're hot
shit. I don't."]

[Vertical bar. Full length shot of Asaba walking down the corridor.]

Asaba: [VO] And I walked away.

[Vertical bar. Close up of the boy's head and shoulders. His mouth is a
scowl.]

Asaba: [VO] After that we were enemies.

[Vertical bar. Close up of a cup of coffee being dispensed.]

Asaba: [VO] He picked fights with me whenever he could, and I picked
fights with him. Not even real fights, just petty little things.

[Asaba's hand reaches for the coffee from the right, but suddenly the
cup is snatched away by a hand from the left.]

[Horizontal bar. Asaba looks to the left of the dispenser, taken
aback.]

[Horizontal bar. Asaba is staring, left background. The red-haired boy
is in the right foreground, sipping the coffee.]

[Vertical bar. Full length shot of the boy, his back turned, walking
away with the coffee.]

Asaba: [VO] For instance, he would steal drinks right out of my hand
just to annoy me...

[Vertical bar. Close up of a bowl of ramen.]

[A hand holds a pair of chopsticks over the ramen, but suddenly the
bowl is snatched away by Asaba's hands.]

[Horizontal bar. The boy looks to his left.]

[Horizontal bar. The boy is staring, left background. Asaba is in the
right foreground, cradling the bowl in one arm and eating with
chopsticks with the opposite hand.]

[Vertical bar. Full length shot of Asaba, his back turned, walking away
with the ramen.]

Asaba: [VO] So I responded in kind by stealing his food. Eventually I
did such things without even thinking about them too hard. In an odd
way I came to enjoy the game.

[Horizontal bar. Asaba is walking down the corridor, smiling to
himself.]

Asaba: [VO] One day my princess confronted me...

[Vertical bar. Shot from the waist up of the girl, scowling.]

[Vertical bar. Shot from the waist up of Asaba, surprised.]

[Caption at left: "Oh, hi."]

Asaba: [VO] ...and told me to leave her friend alone.

[Vertical bar. Close up of the girl's head and shoulders. Her mouth is
shouting angrily.]

[Caption at right: "If you hurt him on my account, I'll never forgive
you!"]

[Vertical bar. Close up of Asaba's head. Now he is the one scowling.]

[Vertical bar. Full length of the girl walking up some stairs.]

[Vertical bar. Shot of Asaba looking up the stairs.]

Asaba: [VO] So finally I asked her...

Asaba: [calling up stairs, to girl; angrily] What do you see in him
anyway?

[Vertical bar. Full length of the girl looking back at Asaba.]

Asaba: [VO] She replied...

[Vertical bar. Close up of the girl's head and shoulders.]

Girl: [contralto; evenly] You of all people should know. He doesn't
want anything from me.

[Vertical bar. Full length of the girl continuing up the stairs.]

[Vertical bar. Shot of Asaba looking up the stairs, no longer
scowling.]

Asaba: [VO] I thought about that for a long time, and I still do.

[Horizontal bar. Asaba, left, and the red-haired boy, right, meet in a
corridor.]

Asaba: [VO] For his part her friend had tired of my harassment...

[Vertical bar. Close up of the boy's head and shoulders. His mouth
betrays anger.]

Asaba: [VO] ...and said so in no uncertain terms.

[Caption to right: "Answer me something. Has all this crap got
something to do with my girlfriend?"]

[Vertical bar. Asaba from the waist up, looking superior.]

[Caption at left: "It took you this long to figure it out?"]

[Vertical bar. Close up of the boy's head and shoulders.]

[Caption at right: "How petty and self-centered are you, anyway?"]

[Vertical bar. Asaba from the waist up.]

Asaba: [VO] So I challenged him to prove he was more worthy of her than
I was.

[Caption at top left: "No more than you."]

[Caption at bottom left: "Prove me wrong and I'll give up on her and
leave you alone."]

[Vertical bar. Full length shot of Asaba walking away.]

Asaba: [VO] How seriously he took my challenge I don't know, but I had
my answer sooner than I thought I would.

[Vertical bar. Shot of the clock at Cinema Cinecitta.]

Asaba: [VO] At the time I had a job working Sunday afternoons at
Cinecitta.

[Vertical bar. Asaba, in street clothes, is walking on the sidewalk
near the cinema.]

Asaba: [VO] I had just gotten off work, and was headed back home when I
saw him outside the cinema.

[Vertical bar. The red-haired boy, himself in street clothes, is coming
out of a phone booth.]

[Vertical bar. Shot of the boy's right profile from waist up. He checks
a watch; his expression is dejected.]

Asaba: [VO] He looked like he'd been there quite a while.

[Horizontal bar. Asaba, left, taps the boy, right, on the shoulder.]

Asaba: [VO] So more out of habit than anything else I went up to him to
give him a hard time.

[Vertical bar. Shot of the boy turning to look at Asaba.]

[Vertical bar. Shot of Asaba looking at the boy, his hands in his
pockets, smirking.]

[Caption at top left: "Hey. Fancy meeting you here."]

Asaba: [VO] So I tapped him on the shoulder and asked him, just to
annoy him...

Asaba: "Did she stand you up or what? How long have you been here?"

[Vertical bar. Shot of the boy's head and shoulders. His mouth yells at
Asaba, less out of anger than of distress.]

[Caption at left: "Try two goddamn hours, asshole! I've been here two
hours waiting for her and the last thing I need right now is your
shit!"]

[Caption at right: "What's the matter with you anyway? Just 'cause
every girl in the school wants you, you think you're better than me or
something?"]

[Vertical bar. Shot of Asaba looking at the boy, taken aback.]

Asaba: [VO] It turned out he'd been there waiting for her for two
hours, and when he said so he looked like he was about to cry. It hit
me--would I have been that devoted to her myself?

[Vertical bar. Asaba, left foreground, bows low to the red-haired boy.]

Asaba: [VO] Right there I apologized for everything I'd done. At first
he thought I was making fun of him again...

[Caption at left: "Look, I'm sorry. I had you all wrong..."]

[Caption at right: "What's with all the kiss-ass?"]

[Vertical bar. Front view of Asaba looking hesitant, unsure what to
say.]

[Caption at left: "Listen, this may sound kind of weird..."

[Caption at right: "...but if taking her off you involves hurting you
like this, I'm not interested."]

Asaba: [VO] But I assured him I'd leave them in peace from now on, and
that I'd like to make amends with him. In any case...

Asaba: [to boy] Locking horns with you's actually been kind of fun.

[Vertical bar. Close up of head and shoulders of boy. He is smiling.]

Asaba: [VO] We were friends after that.

[Vertical bar. Full length shot of the girl, in street clothes, running
up to Asaba and her boyfriend.]

Asaba: [VO] She actually showed up right after that. It turned out
there had been an emergency at her house...

[Horizontal bar. Asaba, left, is scolding the girl, center, while the
boy, right, tries to play peacemaker. The girl looks rather ashamed.]

[Caption at bottom left: "Leaving your boyfriend standing around for
two hours! How could you?"

[Caption at top center: "I'm sorry, Hideaki..."]

[Caption at bottom right: "It's okay, it doesn't matter now..."]

Asaba: [VO] So I ended up scolding her much more than I should have.
For all I know I defused a pretty ugly fight between the two of them.
Which was good...

[Horizontal bar. Asaba, the boy and the girl are eating lunch on the
school lawn, all in summer uniforms.]

Asaba: [VO] ...because now I can't imagine them apart.

[Vertical bar. The girl is sitting on the grass, chopsticks in her
hand, looking cheerful.]

Asaba: [VO] She and I made up, and we get on okay these days. We're
still not as close as we were, though, because I still have a thing for
her, and she knows it. Funny thing is...

[Vertical bar. The boy is sitting on the grass, munching happily on a
sandwich.]

Asaba: [VO] I'm actually better friends with her boyfriend now than
with her.

[Cut back to Asaba's right profile from the waist up, lying on the
futon, staring at the ceiling.]

Asaba: And the fact is she's probably much better off with him than she
ever would have been with me. I dunno what that means. [beat] I think
it means that just because you like someone doesn't mean you're right
for them. Or that they're right for you. And the people you're sure are
the worst possible for someone could end up being the best match
humanly possible.

[Beat.]

[Cut to Kano, still in her fetal position, sitting against the wall.]

Kano: Asaba? Why did you tell me all that just now?

[Cut back to Asaba's right profile from the waist up, lying on the
futon, staring at the ceiling.]

Asaba: I dunno. For the record, you're the first person I ever told
this story to.

[Cut to Kano sitting against the wall.]

Kano: Why?

Asaba: [off] You want to know why I can blow off girls without thinking
about it, even?

Kano: Why?

Asaba: Because I don't give a shit about any of them, that's why.
You're the first one I actually cared enough about as a person for me
to think I owed her an explanation.

[SFX: Asaba getting up from his futon.]

[Kano looks up to watch him rise.]

Kano: [quavering voice] What's that supposed to mean?

[Shot of Asaba from Kano's perspective, now standing, looking down at
Kano, an apologetic look on his face.]

Asaba: This is going to sound really trite and really stupid, and I
know you're not going to buy it for a second, but here goes. Kano,
you're really not very subtle. I know why you're here. You're really
nice, and I'm really flattered, but it's not going to happen. I'm
sorry, really I am. Better luck next time. Don't worry, I won't tell
your sis about this. [beat; offers his hand to her] Come on, get up.
I'll walk you to the station. Can't have you walking by yourself in the
dark, not in this part of town...

[He trails off. Cut to Kano, back in her fetal position, staring
straight ahead. She does not move.]

[Cut back to Asaba, looking down at Kano, standing with his hand out.]

Asaba: You can't stay here, you know.

[Cut back to Kano.]

Kano: [suddenly] Don't patronize me. I'm not a child.

[Cut to Asaba, looking down at Kano, taken aback.]

Asaba: What?

[Cut to Kano. She suddenly stands up.]

[Red screen.]

[SFX: A loud slap.]

[Shot of Asaba staggering back towards the window, his left cheek
already beginning to redden. He stands stunned for a moment.]

[Shot of a front view of Kano, standing in front of Asaba, a look of
horror on her face as she realizes what she's done.]

[Shot from right profile of Kano in same pose. Beat. Pan to right as
she suddenly runs to Asaba and embraces him.]

[Close up on Kano's face beginning to tear up.]

Kano: Oh, Asaba, I'm so sorry! [kisses his chest] I'll never do that
again, I don't know what came over me! [kisses him again] Don't hate
me, please! I love you, Asaba! I want to stay with you!

[Asaba's arms rise and pull Kano off his chest Pan to left as she is
pushed back. She looks up at him.]

[Close up of Asaba's face.]

Asaba: Jesus Christ! What's gotten into you, Kano? Are you feeling all
right?

[Shot of Asaba, right, holding Kano, left, firmly by the arms. He lets
the arms go and turns his back on her.]

Asaba: I'm sorry. I'm sorry, let's just...let's just both calm down,
okay? [beat; firmly] Listen, I know you don't want to hear this, and I
don't like having to say it to you of all people, but I don't want to
be your boyfriend, and that's the end of it. Get your stuff. I'm taking
you home.

Kano: [pleading] Why not? You said you wanted someone to look after
you! Here I am! I can cook and clean! I'll take care of you!

Asaba: Cook? Look around you! There's nowhere here _to_ cook!

Kano: That's not the point! What's wrong with me?

Asaba: [turning to face her; increasingly frustrated, overwhelmed]
Nothing! Nothing! It's just...[looks around the room for inspiration,
finds none]...oh shit...look, you're just not my type, okay? And even
if you were, I couldn't go steady with Yukino Miyazawa's little sister!
It'd be like sleeping with my little sister or something!

[Close up on Kano's face, right profile.]

Kano: [suddenly angry] What's Sis got to do with this anyway? What
about me?

[Close up on Asaba's face, left profile.]

Asaba: I hardly know you, Kano! She's the only reason I know you at
all!

[Close up on Kano's face, right profile.]

Kano: [now pleading] Why can't I be yours, Asaba? We've so much in
common...

[Close up on Asaba's face, left profile.]

Asaba: [sarcastic] Like what? Fast food? A fucking cartoon?

[Beat. He bows his head and turns away again.]

[Shot of Asaba, left foreground, looking out the window, while Kano
stands right background.]

Asaba: Listen, I said the exact same thing to my first crush, okay?
Both of us, I figured, had no families left as far as I knew. Guess
what? It didn't make her like me back. Think about it a second, Kano,
okay? Calm down for a bit and think about it. Brothers and sisters have
lots in common. They don't date, do they? That's not romantic, that's
sick...

Kano: So what's your point?

Asaba: My point is that's not how it works, okay? [sighs] Listen, all
that aside. My life sucks. Trust me, you do not want the job of keeping
me out of trouble. It's tough enough for Soichiro, and he doesn't have
to
live with me. Look. Do yourself a big favor and go back to your nice
normal family where you belong and everyone loves you, okay? I've
nothing to offer you anyway.

Kano: I don't want anything from you.

[Shot of Asaba looking out the window. He turns to face Kano, towards
the camera.]

Asaba: Then what do you want?

[Close up on Kano's neck and throat, from Kano's right. Her lips start
to move, but it is not her voice we hear.]

Yukino: [VO; in time with Kano's lips] I want you.

[Cut back to Asaba. His eyes widen.]

Asaba: Do you have a clue what you're saying?

[Shot of Kano's red cravat falling to the floor.]

Yukino: [VO] Yes.

[Cut back to Asaba, who is now watching the spectacle before him
transfixed, like a deer in headlights.]

Asaba: Kano...Kano, have you gone crazy?

[Shot of Kano's uniform falling to the floor.]

Yukino: [VO] Don't worry. Here.

[SFX: Footsteps across the floor.]

[Still of Kano, now in just a white bra, blue panties and socks,
embracing Asaba and kissing him on the lips as he stands transfixed at
the extreme right of the screen.]

[Beat.]

[Asaba suddenly snaps out of it. He struggles to get free, while Kano
resists.]

Asaba: [protesting ad lib.] Kano, let me go! What the hell are you
doing? We can't do this! For God's sake stop it!

[Cut to the floor, where the lunch box lies forgotten. In the _pas de
deux_ Asaba steps on the box and trips.]

[SFX: The two bodies crashing to the floor.]
[Shot from below of Asaba, looking down at Kano.]

Voice: [female, teenaged (it might be Nanami Kiryu); VO, from TV,
rather tinny; singing in Japanese]

My country's no country, it's the wintertime
My garden's no garden, it's the frozen plain

[Shot from above of Kano from the bust up, lying spread-eagled on her
back on the floor, her arms gripped by Asaba's hands. She looks
flushed; she trembles slightly.]

Voice: [VO; singing]

My highway's no highway, it's the fallen snow
My country's no country, it's the wintertime

[Shot from the floor of the bottom of the door. It suddenly opens.]

[Shot of the manager, coming in unannounced.]

Manager: [beginning her "where the hell's my rent" rant] Good evening,
Mr. Asaba. I don't suppose there is any chance of my...[trails off]

Voice: [VO; singing in French, perhaps in a different key]

Mon pays ce n'est pas un pays, c'est l'hiver
Mon jardin ce n'est pas un jardin, c'est la pleine

[Shot of the view from inside the corridor. The manager, her back
turned to the camera, looks at the scene on the floor before her. Asaba
is on top of the half-naked Kano, his arms pinning hers to the floor.]

Voice: [VO; singing]

Mon chemin ce n'est pas un chemin, c'est la neige
Mon pays ce n'est pas un pays, c'est l'hiver

[Beat.]

[Close up on Asaba's face. He is a mask of shock and embarrassment.]

Asaba: Mrs. Manager, this isn't what it looks like, I swear...

[Shot of the manager's face.]

Manager: [far too politely] Please excuse me for having disturbed you,
Mr. Asaba. I shall return at a more convenient time.

[The manager leaves, closing the door behind her.]

[Shot from above of Kano from the bust up. She watches the manager as
she leaves, then looks back to Asaba, then looks away, ashamed.]

[Shot from below of Asaba, looking up at the manager as she leaves. He
looks back down at Kano, flushes in embarrassment and all but jumps off
Kano.]

[Shot from above of Kano, looking away from the ceiling, ashamed. Her
arms are no longer held down by Asaba.]

[Shot of Asaba's left profile as he sits in the chair at the table. He
covers his face with his hands so as keep from looking at Kano any
more.]

Asaba: [drained] Put your clothes back on and get your stuff. I'm
taking you to the station.

[Cut to the front door of the boarding house. The manager is still
outside, smoking another cigarette on the porch. The door opens. Asaba
emerges, dragging Kano (now fully dressed) behind him by the wrist. The
manager looks up to acknowledge him.]

Manager: [starting again] Mr. Asaba, where is my...

Asaba: [not looking at her] Like fuck it's your rent! You just work
here! I don't have time for this!

[Cut to a view of the street. The sun has set, and the light has become
very poor; electric lights have gone on in various windows. The stacks
of the factory are cast in shadow, so the sky is as red as blood, and
the stacks as black as ink.]

[SFX [optional]: A piano discord.]

[Shot of Kano from left profile, from waist up, in her school uniform,
her bag on her back, her right arm being tightly held in Asaba's left
hand as she walks beside him to his left. She looks shaken,
apprehensive; she looks back and forth, her eyes darting this way and
that. At last she looks to the right.]

[Shot of a wall. On the left someone has drawn a North Korean flag,
with a slogan underneath in _hangul_. On the right, as if in response,
someone else has drawn an imperial Japanese flag and the words in
Japanese LONG LIVE THE EMPEROR.]

[Shot of a boarded up storefront. Beside the FOR SALE sign someone has
written in English FUCK USA, FUCK WTO. Nobody has bothered responding
to that one.]

[In the background some people start shouting.]

[Shot of Kano beside Asaba, looking to the right. She turns back and
looks left towards the noise.]

[Shot of the outside of what is presumably a bar, with a sign reading
BRASSERIE in Latin characters. From inside a woman can be heard singing
in Korean, in a cracked voice. Outside two men are shouting at each
other in Korean.]

[Close up on the two men. A short one, left, and a taller man, right
are arguing; the short man is holding his right hand in his left,
clearly in pain, looking accusatory, while the taller man is pointing
to the hand, looking derisive.]

[Cut back to Kano looking apprehensively at the fight.]

Asaba: [off; warning] Don't pay them any attention, they've been there
since noon.

[Kano looks up towards Asaba.]

[Cut to a close up of Asaba's face, left profile.]

Asaba: First rule of surviving in this neighborhood. Mind your own
business.

[Cut to a row of lockers, the kind found in mass-transit stations.]

[SFX: Various noises from mass-transit stations ad lib.: people going
to and fro; garbled conversations; garbled announcements; etc.]

[Cut to a commuter train terminal, where people in cheap suits and
other clothes of highly variable quality are milling about.]

[Cut to a shot from below (from Kano's perspective, say) of Asaba's
head and shoulders, right profile. He looks straight ahead,
expressionless.]

[Full length shot of Kano from right profile, standing at Asaba's
right. She looks straight ahead, expressionless. Asaba is no longer
holding her wrist.]

[Beat.]

Kano: [finally; seeming to remember something] Asaba...[starts to take
off her bag] I forgot to give you something...

Asaba: [off; gently enough, but firmly] If it's chocolate, I can't take
it, Kano.

[Kano stops in her tracks. Finally she puts the bag back on.]

Kano: Oh. Okay. [beat] I just thought maybe you didn't get any after
all.

Asaba: [off] What, chocolate? Certainly I got chocolate. More than I
could carry, almost.

Kano: I didn't see any in the room.

Asaba: [off] Yeah, because it all went in the dumpster.

[Shot of Kano from above (from Asaba's perspective perhaps), looking up
at Asaba, looking a little shocked.]

Kano: But why?

[Cut to a shot from Kano's perspective of Asaba's head and shoulders,
right profile. His face is still blank, staring straight ahead.]

Asaba: I can't live on chocolate, Kano. It makes me sick.

Announcer: [VO; lower-class voice trying to sound middle-class, gender
unimportant] The 6:30 train to East Kawasaki is now arriving on track
number four. For your safety, please remain behind the yellow line.

[Cut back to Kano from right profile looking up at Asaba. She turns
back to look staright ahead.]

Kano: Look...I'm really sorry about all this...

Asaba: [off; neutral voice] That's okay.

Kano: Do you hate me?

Asaba: [off; neutral voice] No. Why should I?

[Beat.]

Kano: Are you really not going to tell my sister?

Asaba: No. There's no point. [beat] Can I ask you a question?

Kano: Sure.

Asaba: Do you think you'd have waited two hours for me to show up
somewhere?

Kano: [feigning certitude, looking up at him] Yes! [beat; capitulating,
hanging her head] No. [beat] I don't know.

Asaba: Don't try doing that again until you can answer.

[His right hand suddenly shoves her forward, off camera. She might gasp
slightly.]

[Full length front view of Asaba standing on the terminal.]

Asaba: [ordering] And don't ever come here on your own again.

[In front of him train doors shut.]

[Cut to Kano looking at him through the door windows.]

[SFX: Noises of the commuter train starting to move.]

[Shot of Asaba standing there a moment, then turns right and heads off.
Pan right to follow him, as if the train were heading in the same
direction.]

[Cut back to the left-hand side of the terminal (as seen through the
door windows, where people continue to mill. They seem for a moment to
part into two columns. In between them appears Yukino Miyazawa, clad in
her South Shirakawa school uniform, looking as queenly as possible,
walking with impeccable posture towards the right.]

[Shot through the door windows of Asaba, right, walking right through
the crowd, his hands in his pockets. Yukino appears behind him, left,
walking towards him. Just before she catches up she might do an
impressive pirouette. When she does catch up with him, pan camera to
bring them both to the center of the screen, where Yukino takes his
right arm and looks up towards him endearingly.]

[Shot of Kano watching the scene unfold on the terminal through the
door window.]

[Shot of Asaba and Yukino walking right through the crowd, her left arm
in his right. She is now wearing her junior high sweatsuit and glasses,
her hair in barrettes, her feet bare. She looks to her right, towards
the train window, and flashes a nasty, triumphant grin. The camera
starts to pan right.]

[Shot of Kano watching Yukino through the window.]

[Shot of Asaba and Yukino walking right through the crowd, her left arm
in his right, Yukino looking towards the train window and grinning at
Kano nastily. The camera continues to pan right with increasing speed.
With her right arm Yukino gives Kano the finger. With that the train is
plunged into darkness.]

[Beat.]

[Black background. Full-length shot from left profile of Kano, slumped
in a chair, perhaps a chair from the train.]

Kano: What have I done?

[Close up on Kano's face, left profile.]

Kano: Asaba probably hates me now because I did something dumb and now
he thinks I'm a tramp! What was I thinking?

[Black screen. Caption in white type: WHAT INDEED?]

[Close up on Kano's face, left profile.]

Kano: I just wanted him to be my boyfriend! I didn't want this to
happen!

[Shot of Aya from waist up, right profile, looking down towards Kano.]

Aya: [big-sisterly] Yukino's Yukino, you're you. Get your own friends
for God's sake.

[Cut to Aya, left, standing in front on Kano, right, sitting in the
chair.]

Kano: [whining] I don't want my own friends. I want Asaba.

[Black screen. Caption in white type: WHY?]

[Full-length front view of Kano slumped in the chair.]

Kano: [defensive] I don't know why! You can't pick who you like, right?
'Sides, Yukino has a cool boyfriend, why can't I?

[Black screen. Caption in white type: IS THAT THE ONLY REASON YOU
DESIRED HIM?]

[Close up on Kano's head.]

Kano: [whining] I don't know!

Yukino: [VO; chipper, patronizing] Don't feel bad about it.

Kano: [looking up] Huh?

[Shot from the waist up of Yukino in her winter Hokuei uniform. She is
smiling her fakest, most condescending smile.]

Yukino: Better luck next time.

[Close up on Kano's face from front.]

Kano: [quavering voice] Sister?

[Full length front view of Yukino, now in her sweatsuit and glasses,
now slouching in a train chair, striking a Napoleonic pose.]

Yukino: [imperiously] When are you going to accept the fact that _I'm_
fantastic?

[Head and shoulders shot of Tsukino, looking slightly to her left, a
nervous smile on her face.]

Tsukino: [as if to tease Kano] I do, ask Kano...!

[Shot of Kano from front, waist up, covering her face with her hands.]

Kano: [shaking her head; epiphanic, not a hint of irony] Of course! How
could I have been so dumb? Why would someone special like Asaba like
me anyway? Who needs me when you've got the most perfect girl in the
whole school for your friend already? What more could he want?
[despairing] I'm a moron! I'm such a stupid moron!

[Front view of Asaba from waist up, his arms folded.]

Asaba: I know what you're thinking.

[Black screen. Caption: THEY ARE LIKE GODS.]

[Shot of Kano from left profile, waist up, her hands in her lap,
looking at them rather than at Asaba.]

Kano: [quietly] I cannot possibly compare to her.

[Right profile of Asaba from waist up, his arms folded.]

Asaba: What if I told you were wrong?

[Shot of Kano from left profile, waist up, her hands in her lap,
looking at them rather than at Asaba. Beat.]

Kano: [finally; defeated] You'd have been lying.

[Close up of Yukino's face. Her expression is of satisfaction, almost
smirking.]

[Shot of Yukino in her winter uniform, left, sitting demurely in a
chair across from Kano, slumped in her chair at right.]

Yukino: [softly, almost tenderly] Does that frighten you?

Kano: Yes.

Yukino: Do I frighten you?

[Beat.]

Kano: Yes.

[Full length front view shot of Yukino, now in her kimono, barefoot,
her hands folded in her lap.]

Yukino: [smiling; almost soothing] Did I frighten you that night?

[Full length front view shot of Kano slumped in her chair. Her head
shoots up.]

Kano: [shocked] What?

[Cut back to Yukino. Her smile is now mocking.]

Yukino: [colder] I must have, otherwise you would have come closer.

[Shot of Arima's face, smiling pleasantly.]

Arima: Hi.

[Cut back to Yukino.]

Yukino: You could have learned much more. Perhaps you could even have
succeeded.

[Shot from front of Kano's head and shoulders. Her face is a mask of
horror and shame. She covers her mouth.]

Kano: Oh God...[covers her eyes; pleading] I'm so sorry, sister! I've
been so dirty and disgusting! I'll never do it again, I swear! Please!
Have pity on me!

Yukino: [off] I do pity you.

[Close up on Kano's face. She uncovers her eyes to look at Yukino.]

Kano: Huh?

[Shot of Yukino's lower body as she rises from her chair.]

[Shot of Yukino from front, waist up. Her expression is superior, with
a hint of cruelty.]

Yukino: Your technique needs a great deal of work.

[She starts to move left. Pan the camera left as she does so, until she
is standing beside Asaba, on her left. She kisses Asaba on the cheek,
then looks back to Kano.]

Yukino: I'm sure I could have done a much better job.

[Shot from the (black) "floor" where stand Asaba and Yukino. Yukino's
kimono slowly falls to the floor.]

[Shot of Kano, looking up at Yukino and Asaba in disbelief.]

[SFX: Kisses, mutterings, then moans and erotic cries that slowly
increase in intensity. This time, they must be of the sort calculated
to elicit disgust, embarrassment, and shame.]

[Kano's look turns from disbelief to horror; she covers her mouth; she
might begin to shake slightly. At last she covers her eyes to blot out
the spectacle before her.]

Kano: [shaking her head; almost screaming] No! NO! Sister, please!
Don't make me look at that! Anything but that! Please stop it! I don't
care what else you do to me, but not that! For the love of GOD...!

[The cries suddenly stop. Kano looks up.]

[Shot of the inside of a commuter train. The passengers are staring at
Kano; they immediately start pretending they haven't been.]

Child: [gender unimportant; off] Who's she talking to, mama?

Mother: [off; unnerved] Don't look at her any more, dear...

[Shot of Kano in her chair on the train. She seems to be not quite sure
how she got there. A small child is dozing to her left, a middle-aged
man in a cheap suit at her right.]

[Cut to the front of the Miyazawa house at night. It is now lit up with
electric light.]

[Caption: 2001.2.14 19.15]

[Cut to the door of the Miyazawa house. It opens.]

Kano: [off; drained] I'm home.

[Shot of front hall. The living room can be seen to be lit up.]

[The camera shows Kano's perspective as she walks up the stairs, down
the hall to the girls' bedroom, opens the door of the dark room and
collapses on her futon.]

[SFX: A body throwing itself on a bed.]

[Black Screen.]

[Beat.]

[Cut to Kano's head and shoulders, her arms folded before her as she
lies on the futon in the dim light.]

[Shot of a fancy-looking box of chocolates, sitting at the end of a
futon, presumably just in front of Kano.]

[SFX: Peropero barking.]

[Cut to Kano's face. She looks right to acknowledge Peropero.]

[Cut to the floor under the door of the girls' bedroom. Peropero is
there, wagging his tail. He barks.]

[Cut back to Kano's head and shoulders, looking in his direction.]

Kano: [softly] Hi, Peropero. You wanna welcome me home?

[SFX: Peropero bounding towards Kano.]

[Kano's eyes trace out Peropero's path, until she's right in front of
him. She smiles weakly, indulgently.]

[Shot of Peropero sniffing the chocolates. Kano's hand reaches out to
pet him.]

Kano: [off; laughing weakly] No, Peropero, you can't have those.
They'll make you sick, 'k?

[Cut back to Kano's head and shoulders as she reaches out to Peropero;
she is still smiling weakly.]

Kano: [babyish tone, of the sort reserved for pets] Did that bad sister
of mine not give you your dinner yet? I'll get it for you in a minute,
okay? I've had a really rough day...

Yukino: [off; sharply] Kano, is that you?

[Kano looks up to acknowledge her, but does not answer.]

[Cut to the floor by the door. Someone is standing there, but Yukino's
feet (for it is she) are cast in shadow, and so appears to be in
silhouette.]

[SFX: Peropero whimpering.]

[Peropero, perhaps spooked by the noise, dashes out the door and out of
sight.]

[Shot from waist up of Yukino standing in the door, apparently in
silhouette, cast in shadow by the light from the hall. Her face is
cast in complete darkness, save for light glinting off her glasses,
making reading her expression impossible, and it is only obvious that
it is Yukino from the shape of her hair and clothes; apparently she is
wearing her sweatsuit. Her right hand rests on the door.]

Yukino: [sarcastic] You going to lie in the dark in your uniform all
night?

[Cut back to Kano's head and shoulders. She looks away from Yukino,
straight ahead towards the chocolates.]

Kano: [sullen, defiant] Maybe.

[Still of a panoramic view of the room. At the bottom left of the
screen Kano lies on her futon, staring at the chocolates. At the right
of the screen the bright light from the hall breaks the overall dim
light in the rest of the room; the bright light itself is cut by
Yukino's shadow.]

[Beat.]

Yukino: [sternly] It's seven-thirty. I don't believe for a second your
club activities could have kept you that long. Do you want to tell me
where the hell you've been?

Kano: [bluntly] No.

[Beat.]

Yukino: Fine. Be that way. [beat] Where were you, Kano?

Kano: Who wants to know? Mom and Dad?

Yukino: They're not home yet. [beat] Fortunately for you.

Kano: Then I'm not telling.

Yukino: Why not?

Kano: [raising her voice] Because it's none of your business! You're
not my mom, don't make like you are!

[Beat.]

Yukino: It's not like I don't have a pretty good idea where you were,
Kano.

Kano: Is that a fact?

[Beat.]

Yukino: [restrained] Aya Sawada read me the riot act in school today.
She said you'd turned up at her door unannounced demanding she write a
love poem, of all things. She was really angry because she thought I'd
given you her address. [beat] It also looked like someone had been
going through my purse. Specifically, my address book. Is there
something you want to tell me?

Kano: No.

Yukino: [scolding, but still restrained] It's very rude to go through
people's things without asking them. That, and it's very rude to show
up on people's doorsteps uninvited. Aya's very busy with her writing.
She doesn't want people bothering her out of the blue...

Kano: [cutting her off, ironic] That's news to me. People show up on
our doorstep uninvited all the time.

Yukino: [curtly] And what's that supposed to mean?

Kano: You're the smartest girl in the school. Figure it out yourself.

[Beat.]

Yukino: Something else. There are plenty of places in this town where
you don't go at night. There are places a woman shouldn't go by herself
in the daytime, even. Like the district around the factory.

Kano: [playing dumb] So what's your point?

Yukino: That's where Asapin lives. [beat] Kano, did you go by
yourself...

Kano: [cutting her off] He told me he liked someone else. Said it was a
friend of yours. [beat] And you know, that kind of figures. [beat]
Happy now?

Yukino: [a somewhat softer voice] Kano...

[Shot from above of the box of chocolates. Kano's hand grabs the box.]

[Black screen.]

[SFX: Sound of the box hitting something soft with great force.]

[Cut to the floor under the door. The box lies at (the silhouette of)
Yukino's feet.]

[Cut to the inside of the room as seen from the door. Kano is standing
as if having thrown something (viz. the chocolates), a murderous look
on her face. She is gasping; she might be starting to sweat.]

[Cut to Yukino's silhouette from the waist up.]

Yukino: [tenderly, apologetic] Kano, I'm sorry...

[Shot of Kano from waist up, her face twisted in anger.]

Kano: [exploding] Like HELL you're sorry! What've you got to be sorry
about anyway? You've got everything you could possibly want! Go on,
laugh your ass off! That's what you want to do, right? Do me a big
favor and save the sensitive act for someone who'll buy that line of
crap! Think I don't know what a vain, self-centered, insensitive
heartless WITCH you really are?

[Cut to Yukino's silhouette from the waist up.]

Yukino: [as if she'd been slapped] What?

[Shot of Kano from waist up. There are tears in her eyes.]

Kano: What did I do to deserve this? How come you get to be beautiful
and smart and popular and be friends with the coolest people on earth
and find a boyfriend without even _trying_, and I get to be just a dumb
kid whose only claim to fame is I'm Yukino Miyazawa's little sister no
matter what I do, and when I open my heart to a guy I get it torn out
and shoved down my throat? If you're sorry, prove it! Do whatever you
do to Asaba and everybody to make them love you and do whatever the
heck you want and get him to like me! _As if I didn't know what that
was!_

[Cut to Yukino's silhouette from the waist up.]

Yukino: [shocked] Kano, are you feeling all right?

[Shot of Kano from waist up.]

Kano: NO! I'm not feeling all right! I'll never feel all right! I can't
help it if Asaba doesn't love me! I can't help it if I'm not special
like you! What's the matter with me? Why can't I be special?

[Cut to Yukino's silhouette from the waist up. She is silent.]

[Beat.]

[Shot of Kano from waist up.]

Kano: ANSWER ME! [beat; her face crumples] Answer me...

[She falls to her knees, covers her face with her hands and begins to
cry.]

[Cut to Yukino's silhouette from the waist up.]

Yukino: Kano...

[Shot of Kano kneeling on the floor, her back to the camera, at
Yukino's feet, her head in her hands.]

[Shot of Yukino's right arm reaching out from viewer's right, only to
be slapped away by Kano.]

Kano: [VO; through her tears] Don't touch me! Don't come near me! Don't
even speak to me! I hate you!

[Cut to Yukino's silhouette from the waist up.]

Yukino: [sadly] Your dinner's in the kitchen. I'll be in the living
room.

[Front view of Kano kneeling on the floor, her head in her hands.]

Kano: [through her tears] I HATE YOU! I don't want to be your sister
any more! I can't stand it! Just go away and leave me alone!

[She looks up.]

[Cut to the door leading out into the hall. The silhouette is gone.]

[Cut back to Kano, still kneeling in front of the door, with a look
almost of disbelief.]

Kano: [trying to sound furious, mostly succeeding in sounding
heartbroken] Fine. Go and yuk it up behind my back like you always do.
See if I care...

[Cut to the futon. Kano throws herself on it and begins to cry again.
Fade to black.]

[SFX: A film projector starting up.]

[A lead-in to a film is projected on the black background.]

[5]

[4]

[3]

[2]

[Black screen]

[If desired, cue the National Film Board of Canada opening animation
from the Seventies: two thick, parallel lines are drawn in green at the
bottom of the screen, suggesting legs, then the bottom of an oval on
top and connecting the "legs," suggesting arms, then a circle in the
center of the oval, suggesting a head; then the top of the oval is
finally drawn in, so that the head becomes the pupil of an eye; beat;
the "eye with legs" rapidly shrinks and retreats to the bottom left of
the screen, and beside it on the right appears the bilingual caption in
green: NATIONAL FILM BOARD OF CANADA
OFFICE NATIONAL DU FILM DU CANADA]

[A shot of Peropero eating out of a Stryofoam bowl of poutine;
background unimportant. Above him is a caption in friendly crayon:
STUDIO POUTINE]

[Black screen.]

[Beat.]

[BGM: Instrumental French Canadian folk music from the archives.]

[File photo of a crossroads in a small village somewhere in Quebec,
preferably with a Catholic church in plain sight. There might be
(anachronistically, given what will follow) be an ARRÊT stop sign at
the crossroads.]

[Fade up captions in French at left: L'OFFICE NATIONAL DU FILM DU
CANADA
ET LE STUDIO POUTINE PRÉSENTENT
and in English at right: THE NATIONAL FILM BOARD OF CANADA
AND STUDIO POUTINE PRESENT]

[Fade out captions.]

[Fade up captions in French at top left: LA CHIENNE NOIRE DU RACONTEUR
and in English at top right: THE STORYTELLER'S BLACK DOG]

[Fade up captions in French at bottom left: Une vraie conte
du Canada français
and in English at bottom right: A true story
of French Canada]

[Fade out captions.]

Narrator: [VO; female, in Japanese, but with French Canadian accent]
Once upon a time, before the English came to Canada...

[Shot of a farmhouse drawn in a simple, kid-friendly fashion in basic
colors in the foreground; in the background is a farm depicted in an
equally kid-friendly fashion, with cows, a big red barn, etc., visible
in the distance. Before it SD Yukino, dressed as a farmer (she might
even have a straw hat), stands looking mighty proud of all she surveys,
her arms folded.]

Narrator: [VO]...there lived a farmer by the name of Jacques Delaneige.

[Camera moves to a view of the farm from the air, perhaps from a tree.
Some cows graze contentedly in a green, flower-strewn field.]

[SFX: Some birds chirp ad lib.]

Narrator: [VO] During the summer, he tilled the most prosperous and
fertile farm in the entire parish.

[The cows disappear, and suddenly the grass disappears to be replaced
by snow.]

[SFX: A cold winter wind blows.]

Narrator: [VO] That was not Jacques' only talent, however, for during
the winter...

[Still of a log fireplace beside which, at right, stands Yukino in her
farmer's outfit, gesticulating wildly as if telling a story. At left
sits the bulk of the _Karekano_ cast in period French Canadian costume,
dressed as peasants and peasant's wives (except for Kazuma, who's still
in his regular black T-shirt and skull bracelet). In the front row sit
Tsubasa, Peropero, and the kindergarten-aged Mr. and Mrs. Miyazawa from
episode 16.]

Narrator: [VO] ...he made his savings go further as the best
storyteller for miles around. He told all sorts of tales:

[Stock footage of Yukino looking every inch the perfect student.]

Narrator: [VO] ...tales of princes and heroes...

[Stock footage of Yukino looking goofy in her sweatsuit.]

Narrator: [VO] ...tales of commoners and fools...

[Stock footage of Yukino beaming and pointing into the air, as if
giving a pep talk.]

Narrator: [VO] ...stories to teach a lesson...

[Stock footage of Yukino and Tsubaki singing karaoke.]

Narrator: [VO] ...stories just for fun...

[Stock footage of SD Yukino jumping for joy.]

Narrator: [VO] ...happy stories...

[Stock footage of normal Yukino with tears in her eyes.]

Narrator: [VO] ...sad stories...

[Stock footage of Hell-Hath-No-Fury Yukino chasing Tsubasa.]

Narrator: [VO] ...scary stories...

[Stock footage of Yukino and Arima embracing.]

Narrator: [VO] ...tales of love...

[Stock footage of Maho glaring at Yukino.]

Narrator: [VO] ...tales of hatred...

[Stock footage of Yukino comforting Tsubasa after their confrontation.]

Narrator: [VO] ...tales of reconciliation...

[Stock footage of Yukino hanging with Maho and Team Tsubasa.]

Narrator: [VO] ...tales of new friends.

[Shot of the crowd listening to the farmer's tale, in utter silence.]

Narrator: [VO] And he told them so well that when he spoke nobody ever
gave him less than their utmost attention, and, for that matter, nobody
ever doubted that the stories were any less than absolutely true.

[The crowd burst out in applause, and start throwing copper coins.]

[Shot of SD Yukino taking a bow as her hat fills with coppers.]

Narrator: [VO] However, the truth was many of the tales were so
fantastic that if anybody else had told them, nobody would have
believed them, not even the smallest child. But Jacques could make any
of them seem real.

[Close up of normal Yukino from waist up, rising from her bow, a smug
smile on her face; she might start to chuckle.]

Narrator: [VO] Which was all very well, except that after a while, he
began to swell up with pride at the thought that he could make people
believe anything he wanted them to believe.

[Cut to SD Yukino, now in her (anachronistic) sweatsuit, sitting at a
table inside her farmhouse counting some money. There might be a log
fire going in a fireplace, a window with snow clearly visible outside,
and so forth. She does not look happy.]

Narrator: [VO] One day in late winter, someone stole a sheep from the
barn in which Jacques kept his flock during the winter.

[Still of one of the sheep from the Asaba Merryland.]

Sheep: [VO] Baa.

[Close up of SD Yukino, cradling her head in her hands, looking glum.]

Narrator: [VO] It was not a good time at all, for not only had he not
the money to replace it, he had not even the money for a guard dog to
watch the farm in case the thief came back. All the money he had he
needed to buy other supplies for the planting season.

[Suddenly SD Yukino perks up, hangs her fist in her hand; a light bulb
might appear above her head.]

Narrator: [VO] Suddenly he had an idea.

[Cut to the file photo of the church at the crossroads.]

Narrator: [VO] The next day was Sunday...

[File photo of the inside of a Catholic church. Paper cutouts of the
_Karekano_ cast are in the pews, heads bowed in prayer.]

Narrator: [VO] ...and so everyone would be at Mass, which was what
Jacques needed for his plan.

[File photo of an altar. Before it a paper cutout of Asaba, dressed as
a priest, is making the motions (silently) of giving the final
prayers.]

Narrator: [VO] After Mass was over, just as everybody was about to
leave...

[Close up on Asaba from the waist up. He looks up suddenly.]

[Shot of Yukino standing in the pews in her (period farmer's) Sunday
best, her hands extended as if making a speech.]

Narrator: [VO] ...Jacques rose and told the people, "If any of you know
who stole my sheep, tell him if he dares return that he does so at his
peril!"

[Close up of of SD Yukino pointing into the air, an evil grin on her
face.]

Narrator: [VO] "For if he does, my big black dog will bite his leg
off!"

[Still of the backyard dog from Asaba's tenement.]

[SFX: A dog barking.]

[Still of an old woman (Maho) standing in another pew, a look of
accusation on her face.]

Narrator: [VO] Someone stood and said, "I pass your house every Sunday
on the way to Mass, and I've never seen or heard any black dog!"

[Close up on Maho's head and shoulders, her mouth open in accusation;
she might be pointing to Yukino.]

Narrator: [VO] "How dare you try to deceive us in the house of the
Lord!"

[Full length shot of Asaba looking skeptical, raising an eyebrow.]

Narrator: [VO] The priest himself asked, "She has a point. Since when
do you have a big black dog, Jacques?"

[Full length shot of Yukino standing, beaming, her finger pointed in
the air.]

Narrator: [VO] "Oh, for quite a while now," said Jacques. "You surely
must have seen her."

[Close up on Yukino's head and shoulders, a frightening expression on
her face, her arms in a pose designed to provoke fear.]

Narrator: [VO] "And oh, but what a fearsome creature she is, with her
big long legs and enormous neck and head and mouth full of teeth! She's
a bitch to be sure, but no less terrible for all that!"

[Shot of Yukino from the waist up, pulling on some black gloves.]

Narrator: [VO] And Jacques pulled on his black work gloves, and made
noises and hand gestures to show the assembly just what the big black
dog was like, just as he would have done to tell his tales about the
_loup-garou_, the werewolf.

[Still of Yukino's left hand in the glove, the palm down, the middle
finger extended to suggest a head and neck. And the thumb and other
fingers pointed towards the ground to suggest four legs.]

Yukino: [VO; impersonating a dog in French] Ouah!

[Shot of Asaba nodding his head.]

Narrator: [VO] The priest was convinced, and said to the old woman...

[Shot of Maho standing silent, embarrassed.]

Narrator: [VO] "Now, now, when has Jacques ever told us something that
wasn't true?"

[Shot of the assembly, their arms folded, nodding in agreement. In the
middle of them SD Yukino is taking a bow.]

Narrator: [VO] And everybody else said the same, and nobody questioned
any more whether the dog was real.

[File photo of the church. Cut-paper drawings of the Karekano cast are
"leaving" church.]

[Narrator: They went in peace to love and serve their Lord, and, as
Jacques had hoped, to tell everyone they knew about Jacques' black dog.

[Shot of the farmhouse.]

Narrator: [VO] Soon everybody knew about the dog, and all through the
summer nobody dared steal from Jacques again.

[Shot of SD Yukino in her sweatsuit inside the farmhouse, rolling about
on the floor laughing herself silly as comically as possible.]

[SFX: Zany, comical laughter.]

Narrator: [VO] As for Jacques, he laughed heartily and grew even more
conceited than ever when he thought that all his neighbors were so
stupid that they could be made to believe in a dog that didn't exist at
all.

[Still of the backyard dog.]

[SFX: The dog barking.]

Narrator: [VO] However, that was not the end, because the legend of the
dog began to spread and grow with the telling.

[Still of a farmer (Arima) telling off a child (Tsubasa) for something
or other; Arima wags his finger while Tsubasa looks nervous.]

Narrator: [VO] Parents started to use the dog to scare their children
into being good.

Arima: [VO] Jacques' big black dog will get you if you do that again!

Tsubasa: [VO] Yes sir!

[Still of three girls in anachronistic Hokuei High uniforms, perhaps
Yukino's sycophants from episode 1, laughing and sharing stories.]

[Caption in French: TÉMOIGNAGE
in English: TESTIMONY]

Narrator: [VO] Tall tales about the dog began to spread.

Girl: I heard Jacques was out hunting and was attacked by an Indian war
party, and the dog drove them away all by herself!

Another: What a brave dog!

A third: I didn't think dogs like that really existed!

[Still of Maho, the old woman, and her old husband (Tsubaki).]

Narrator: After a while, a few people actually claimed to have seen the
dog.

Maho: [VO] She's a much nicer dog than I thought she'd be.

Tsubaki: [VO; impersonating a man] Loves to play fetch.

[Still of a nun (Aya) and a starry-eyed novice (Rika) in their habits.]

Aya: [VO] She's a lot friendlier than you'd think she'd be.

Rika: [VO] Such a sweetheart!

[Shot from waist up of Asaba dressed as a priest, his hand to his chin,
as if contemplating his words.]

Asaba: Truth is, she's not really all that impressive to look at. But
she's a good girl, and she's as loyal as they come...

[He is suddenly set upon by the three girls.]

Girl: Father, could you read to us from the _Song of Songs_ again?

Asaba: [suddenly smiling, looking glamorous] With pleasure!

[Shot of SD Yukino in her farmer's outfit, rolling about on the ground
laughing even harder than before in the foreground, while Asaba chats
up the girls in the background. A couple (Mr. and Mrs. Miyazawa) pass
Yukino, trying not to stare.]

Narrator: [VO] Not that this bothered Jacques at all. Quite the
contrary, all it did was to make the joke even funnier, and make him
swell with pride all the more. What fools! he thought. If only they
knew what fools I'd made of them!

[White screen. Caption at left in French: MAIS...
at right in English: BUT...]

Narrator: [VO] But!

[Shot of SD Yukino inside her farmhouse, in her anachronistic
sweatsuit, sitting on her anachronistic couch watching _Terrance and
Phillip_ on a _very_ anachronistic TV set.]

[SFX: A loud fart.]

[Terrance and Phillip laugh on the TV. SD Yukino laughs with them.]

[SFX: A knock on the door.]

[Yukino looks up from the TV.]

Narrator: [VO] One day there was a knock on Jacques' door.

[Shot of the top of the door, which normal Yukino, dressed as a farmer
again, opens to see who it is.]

Narrator: [VO] It was the woodcutter who lived beside him.

[Shot of a front view of normal Kano, dressed as a lumberjack, standing
before Yukino. She holds her right hand, which appears to be injured,
in her left. She is obviously in pain and just as obviously angry.]

Narrator: [VO] "You big black dog attacked me for no reason at all!" he
said.

[Still of the backyard dog.]

[SFX: The dog barking.]

[Still of Kano's right hand, covered with blood.]

Narrator: [VO] "He jumped out of the bushes as I passed your house on
the road, and nearly bit my hand off! I'm probably lucky to be alive!"

[Still of the porch, on which have fallen some drops of blood.]

Narrator: [VO] "I'll certainly be lucky to ever use this hand again! A
woodcutter with a bad hand has no way of earning a living! You've
condemned me to death!"

[Close up still of Kano's face, shouting in accusation.]

Narrator: [VO] "What are you going to do about this?"

[Still of Yukino's hand holding Kano's bleeding hand, as if to inspect
it.]

Narrator: [VO] Of course, thought Jacques, there was no way it could
have been the imaginary dog, and felt sure the woodcutter was trying to
cheat him. So he said...

[Close up of normal Yukino's head and shoulders.]

Yukino: Either you are lying or you are mad. My dog didn't bite anyone.
I owe you nothing. Go to the doctor now and have him look at it, and
leave me in peace.

[Close up still of Kano's face, scowling.]

Narrator: [VO] "So that's your attitude?" said the woodcutter. "We'll
see about this!"

[Shot of Kano, her back turned to the camera, walking down the path,
holding her injured hand.]

Narrator: [VO] And with that the woodcutter walked off to the
village...

[Shot of Kano standing in a village square, showing off her (now
bandaged) hand, telling passers-by her story.]

Narrator: [VO] ...told everybody his story, and convinced them to come
with him to Jacques' house to force the issue.

[Shot from above of a crowd of people outside the farmhouse door, where
Kano knocks with her good hand.]

[SFX: A knock on the door.]

[Shot of normal Kano, left profile, standing at the door, which is
opened by SD Yukino in her sweatsuit. The crowd is at Kano's back, and
SD Yukino starts to sweatdrop when she sees the size of the crowd.]

[Close up of an arm being pointed in accusation.]

Narrator: [VO] Right behind the woodcutter was the priest, who said...

[Front view of Asaba in his priest outfit, pointing in accusation,
standing a little behind Kano; Kano might lean into him just a little.]

Narrator: [VO] "This man told me your dog bit him. Tell us if this is
true, and be sure you do not lie, on pain of mortal sin."

[Shot of SD Yukino inside the door, sweatdropping, laughing nervously,
and waving her hands in warding.]

Narrator: [VO] "Now, now, father," said Jacques, "how could this man
have been bitten by a dog that doesn't even exist?"

[Close up of Asaba's head and shoulders, with a look of disbelief on
his face.]

Narrator: [VO] "What's that supposed to mean?" said the priest.

[Close up of normal Yukino standing at the door, an exasperated look on
her face, appearing to be raising her voice.]

Narrator: [VO] "It means there is no black dog," said Jacques. "I never
had a big black dog. It was all a trick I played to stop people from
stealing from my farm. Did none of you even think of that?"

[Close up of Kano's face, her eyes shut, growing increasingly angry.]

[Shot of Kano's good arm pointing in accusation.]

Narrator: [VO] "See, father?" said the woodcutter. "I was sure he would
not admit his guilt."

[Shot of Kano looking up to Asaba, with the camera more or less hanging
over Asaba's shoulder.]

Narrator: [VO] "Now he's trying to play us for fools, saying there is
no big black dog, when everybody knows about the dog."

[Shot of Kano from behind, her hands extended, as if addressing the
crowd.]

Narrator: [VO] "Everyone! Were any of you not there at Mass, when
Jacques showed us his big black dog?"

[Still of Yukino's gloved hand, in the gesture suggesting the big black
dog.]

Yukino: [VO] Ouah!

[Close up of Asaba from the waist up, an accusatory look on his face.]

Narrator: [VO] "He is right," said the priest. "You should know better
than to tell such blatant lies before the whole parish and before God.
I, too, saw the big black dog with my own eyes."

[Shot of Asaba's arm pointing to Yukino, who has a look of utter
disbelief.]

Narrator: [VO] "Kneel, and ask God that he might forgive your deceit,
or we will not."

[Shot of Maho, dressed as the old woman, at the front of the crowd.
Tsubaki, dressed as her husband, is beside her. Both look angry and
insulted.]

Narrator: "I saw the dog too," said the old woman, who was standing at
the head of the crowd. "And I," said her husband.

[Still of Aya and Rika in the crowd, dressed as the nun and novice,
looking just as angry.]

Narrator: [VO] "And I!" said the nun. "And I!" said the novice.

[Still of Arima and Tsubasa as the other farmer and his daughter,
ditto.]

Narrator: [VO] "And I!" said Jacques' neighbor. "And I!" said the
neighbor's daughter.

[Shots ad lib. of featureless faces in the crowd shouting angrily,
people waving around pitchforks, guns, bodyboards, and other implements
useful for doing bodily harm. Someone might wave a sign saying A BAS LA
CHIENNE DELANEIGE.]

Crowd: [shouting ad lib.] Et moi! Et moi! Et moi! Et moi! Et moi!

Narrator: [VO] And the crowd all said the same, and got extremely angry
with Jacques and his big black dog, and prepared to tar and feather him
and drive him out of the parish.

[Shot of normal Yukino's head and shoulders, a look of disbelief
turning into fear; this might be a black and white sketch.]

Narrator: [VO] Jacques did not try to say anything else to convince
them of the truth. There was no point telling them the dog did not
exist...

[Shot of the three girls, setting up a fire to boil a cauldron of
pitch.]

Narrator: [VO] ...because to them, the dog was as real as he was...

[Shot of Kano, shaking her good fist at the crowd.]

Narrator: [VO] ...even, or especially, to the woodcutter most of all,
who believed in the dog so much, perhaps, that he really believed it
had bitten his hand.

[Suddenly the film appears to break in the projector; it goes off line,
and suddenly the screen is white.]

[SFX: The film flipping around in its reel, making slapping noises all
the while.]

--
La chienne noire du raconteur
--