Trowa's Torture

Trowa's Torture

"Uh…help…nnn" Trowa was mumbling in his sleep again.

'I wonder if I should wake him up this time?' Quatre thought to himself. He was accustomed to waking up at this hour at least 3 times a week. It was something he had no control over. Every night he would lay down in his bad hoping to not wake up till sun rise and every night he would be awoken by a strange tugging at his heart. It was like his heart was numbed yet he could still somehow feel the pressure of someone stabbing him with a knife. So he guessed you couldn't really call it pain, not for him, for he was numb to it by some thankful chance, instead it was Trowa who felt the real pain that Quatre could only truly guess at, although he rather not.

          The mumblings began to get louder and soon became pleads for help. Every time Quatre awoke to this and then he would stand outside Trowa's door waiting for him to calm down. He wanted to barge in and wake Trowa up, hold him in his arms and hush meaningless words in his ears to let him know that it was ok now, that he would always be safe with Quatre. But no, that wasn't meant to be. The last time Quatre tried to comfort Trowa wasn't to long ago. In fact it was still fresh in his memory.

//flashback//

"Woa! Now 'that' was fun!" Duo laughed as he jumped out of Deathscythe. Unlike the rest of the lot he was still pumped and ready for more. Well, he put on that display at least, but in fact he was as tired as hell. 'Can't let them know though.'

          The others descended from their Gundams as well. At least it appeared that way, but as Quatre headed out the door after Wufei, Heero, and Duo, he noticed that Trowa hadn't come down yet.

'I thought he was ok.' Quatre remembered seeing Heavyarms in the battlefield, he was outnumbered so Quatre went in to give him a hand. There was no reply from Trowa but he assumed he had gotten there in time and that Trowa wasn't hurt. "Trowa?" Quatre called as he began to climb Heavyarms.

When he got to the entrance he noticed the hatch was open and jumped atop that so that he was facing Trowa directly. It was dark inside the cockpit, everything was turned off and the lights in the docking bay just barely hit the outer edges of were Trowa sat so that you could not see his face or much else for that matter. "Trowa…?" this time Quatre whispered something told him there was something wrong.

He carefully took slow steps forward. "Trowa are you ok? I thought I had gotten there in time…" Quatre squinted his eyes once he was halfway in the cockpit trying to get a glimpse of his comrade. And he did, he was just sitting there. There was nothing wrong with him at all, he sat there with a blank expression on his face, yet another of his oh so many masks.

Suddenly Trowa sat up from the seat, causing Quatre to stumble back since the cockpit was too small. They were now both standing on the latch so close Quatre, who was much shorter than the other, could feel Trowa's warm breath on his nose. Quatre shivered at the feeling. "uh…T-tro…" Quatre began to speak again.

"Don't ever, ever, help me again. I don't need it." Trowa said staring straight down at Quatre with eyes that looked to be made of steel.

"I…I just" 'I just wanted to help Trowa'

"Don't." Trowa barked and then pushed Quatre out of the way as he descended his Gundam by the use of a variety of spins and flips.

Quatre was left alone with his shock, blue eyes round and damp. "I just meant to help…" he whispered to the darkness.

//present//

From that day forward Quatre had tried to stay as far away from Trowa as possible and decided that he wouldn't confront him ever again.

Even when he was pleading for his help at times like this and Quatre would just stand with his back to the door waiting for him to stop.

"Helppp…please…please someone, anyone…" Quatre could hear him thrashing and knew that he was getting himself tangled in the sheets.

'Damn it Quatre, you weakling, your just going to leave him in there with his nightmares alone. Just because you're afraid to get yelled at again. Listen to him for fucks sake! He's begging!'

There was a quick curse said underneath Quatre's breath, as if there was actually anyone around to hear him. "That's it." He banged his fist against the door and readied himself to walk through it.

What he saw unsettled him. Trowa was lying in the center of the bed spread eagle. His hands were clutching at the sheets as if for dear life and his eyes were clamped shut. He made another protesting moan through clenched teeth as he struggled against himself. Quatre began to walk up to the bad very slowly thinking that Trowa might punch him in his sleep but yet another whimper came from the body on the bed and he forced himself to walk all the way up to him halfway atop the bed. He didn't care if Trowa hit him in a fit, he wanted to help him. He always had.

"T-trowa?" Quatre moved shaking hands to Trowa's shoulders and gently shoved him as if to wake him up, but the taller pilot didn't respond in anyways other than maybe struggling even more now. Quatre leaned in onto the bed even more completely on it now as he once again shoved Trowa.

This time it did work with drastic effects. In a flash he found 'himself' being the one lying on his back on the bed as Trowa's deep green eyes flicked open. He had Quatre pinned down by the shoulders and was kneeling over him. "Ah… trowa…" Quatre quickly gasped as he realized the situation he was now in. Trowa's eyes narrowed as he looked down on the blond pilot pinned helpless beneath him. He was slightly aware that he was hurting Quatre with his weight leaning in on his shoulders. "I thought I told you to leave me alone." Trowa snipped in the darkness as he looked down into beautiful wide blue eyes. "I..I…Trowa you're hurting me." Quatre shakely whispered as he become conscious of the fact that Trowa was in fact mad at him. He began to push at the strong arms that held him down only to realize that they weren't budging.

"Trowa?" Quatre breathed and then louder and more forcefully "Trowa get off of me."

A quick flash passed through Trowa's eyes that caused Quatre to gasp. 'What was that? … lust?' Fear grabbed at Quatre's heart making him jump underneath Trowa's strong hold trying to free himself. "Trowa I need to leave now."

There was a grunt and then a grin spread across Trowa's handsome face. "Why so soon? You've never been in a rush to leave before." He came down on Quatre and began to rub his lips atop the blondes own soft pink ones.

Quatre was suddenly aware of how aroused his fellow comrade was as the other pressed down against him. "Tr-owa," he gulped, "you're not yourself. I th-think you should get some more rest and I'll see how you are in the morning." He finished with a stutter.

"I don't think so."

And then it was like it wasn't even Trowa anymore those once beautiful eyes were now hazed over and cloudy with lust. He started to lick and nip at the pale flesh around Quatre's neck. "mph…stop." Quatre got out in between rough kisses Trowa was now giving his lips. Some how Trowa had let lose of Quatre's left hand with out him knowing it and brang it down to start caressing his chest, which cause Quatre to gasp. Knowing he would do this Trowa quickly penetrated Quatre's mouth and sought out his tongue playing with it. Quatre now used his free left hand to try and push the other off. "mph! …" Quatre bit down on Trowa's tongue as hard as he could, causing the other immense pain.

"Fuck!" with out warning Trowa raised his hand and slapped Quatre soundly across his face. Quatre was shocked and it showed through his eyes. It hurt him not only physically but emotionally, to know that the only one he dare say he loved had just struck him. After that it was as if Quatre were just a doll completely unresponsive.

"I can't believe you did that." Trowa spat the little amount of blood that Quatre had drawn out of his mouth and on the floor. "It's not like you don't want this. I've seen you. You little slut. The way you stare and gawk at me." Tears began to spill down Quatre's stunned eyes. 'Yes it was true he had always cared for Trowa and wanted him, but not like this.'

"Not like this." Quatre whispered so softly Trowa could barely hear him. All the while when Trowa was speaking to him he had begun to undress them both. They were now both in only their boxers and Trowa was working on those too.

He paused in his chores to question the smaller one. "What are you talking about?" somewhere in Trowa's sleep crazed mind there was 'him' the real Trowa.

"I've always wanted you, but not like this." Quatre admitted quietly.

"Hmph, what does it matter how it is done?" Trowa asked letting up a little on the pressure he was setting on Quatre's wrists.

"I wanted your heart first." Quatre's dazed eyes now cleared as he looked up at Trowa.

It shocked him. 'His eyes are so truthful, and here I am hurting him…trying to rape him the way they did me…' Trowa blinked his watery eyes to clear them.

"Why do you want my heart?" he asked, himself now in a whisper.

"Because… because I believed I loved you."

Trowa didn't know how to respond. He knew how to respond to lust, which is what he was taking care of now, but 'real' emotion, real love.

Silence and absolute stillness.

"Get out of here. And this time listen to me when I say don't ever try to help me again." Trowa released Quatre's arms and sat up on his bed.

Quatre was shocked he was just letting him go. 'This doesn't make any sense.'

"Now!" Trowa shouted not looking up at the slight Arabian. He had his head down looking at the sheets.

Quatre jumped to his feet and skittered out the door not even looking back.

Trowa was once again left alone banging his fist in the sheets and crying. 'Damn it Trowa! He actual 'cared' about you. And you go and try to rape him.'

//next morning//

"Ohiyogoziamasu!" Duo yelped from the kitchen as he flipped yet another pancake in the air. Who would of thought he actually knew how to cook.

One by one all the pilots began to walk groggily through the door.

"Hey where is Trowa?" Duo asked setting the last plate that was meant for his unibanged friend.

At this Quatre notably stiffened causing the others to give him questioning stares. "Is there something we should know about Q-ma?"

Quatre who was previously staring a hole through his pancakes now looked up at Duo meekly. "I …

"No there isn't." Trowa said walking through the kitchen door.

The others lifted an eyebrow at this.

Trowa promptly took a set right nest to Quatre and gave him a peek on the cheek.

The others nearly fell off their chairs.

"Oooo-kay." Duo seated himself lastly at the head of the table.

Quatre completely flabbergasted could only scoop up a bite of his pancakes and stuff them quickly in his mouth.

As if Trowa was trying to give Quatre a heart attack, he put his hand on top of Quatre's underneath the table stunning the small blond. Quatre blinked a couple of times at this and looked up at Trowa, who was already a breath apart from him. "I'm so sorry please I beg of you to forgive me." Trowa whispered so low that it was guaranteed the others didn't hear a single thing the other said. Trowa looked down at their hands and then up at Quatre again through thick eyelashes, "I love you, please tell me you still love me too."

"I…I…are you ok?" 'Baka Quatre! What the hell kind of answer is that to 'I love you'?'

Trowa grinned at this and yanked the other out of his chair pulling him through the kitchen door and not stopping till they were outside in the backyard gardens.

"What the hell is going on?!" Wufei asked Duo and Heero, who in turn with wide eyes shrugged their shoulders. 

Once alone Trowa let go of Quatre's hand his face ashamed and looking at the ground. "Im sorry for what I did last night. I don't know what came over me. I've been acting so strange since that mission", he turned a slight shade of red again as he remembered how cruel he was to the smaller pilot that day. Quatre just stared at Trowa in amazement waiting for him to continue. "I was just so mad at you for saving me, not because I didn't want you help but because…if you would have gotten hurt trying to save me, well I would never forgive myself." He paused for breath "As for last night", he once again turned red, it was as if a whole new Trowa was standing in front if Quatre, "well I've always had a thing for you, and well last night when you came to my room…oh Quatre," he laughed at this part, "your to good to resist, so next time please don't put me in that situation, you've done it a lot you now. I doubt you know it but there have been some situations that I've had to use all my will power not to jump you." He finished with a slight smile on his face.

"So will you forgive me and give me a chance?"

Quatre put his hand up to Trowa's face and then wrapped it around his neck pulling him closer to him. Trowa wasn't really sure what he was doing until he felt those soft lips on his own.

"Of course I will, ashiteru my koi."

~owari~

I'm not sure what happened there it was like dark and then mushy. Well you can blame it on the music I've been listening to. You wouldn't believe how music changes someones mood. Get me a good song and im off.

Anyways thanx for reading and please review.