When Choco/Mog Goes Mad...
By: Deekz


Rated PG-13 for language.


Disclaimer: No, I do not own Squaresoft or anything like that. Don't sue me. I was just bored when I wrote this. Everything came out of the top of my head.






"Cloud! Get back here!" Tifa waved her fists furiously, but it did no use. They were plummeting towards Kalm with nothing to save them.

"I have a piece of excrement on my uniform!!" Cloud cried. "Why?!"

Tifa growled. "BOLT3!" she screamed, a huge bolt slamming into Cloud and blowing him out of the air. He smashed through the inn of Kalm.

"Where…where am I?" Cloud looked around, dazed.

"C-C-CLOUD?!" screamed a voice. "YOU PERVERTED BASTARD!"

Cloud looked around. "What did I do?" he asked. Finally, his eyes settled on a familiar blonde haired girl who just got out of the shower…

"YOU'RE WORSE THEN THAT DON CORNEO PERVERT!" Elena screamed, kicking him. "GET AWAY, SHOO, SHOO!"

"I still have friends that are coming," Cloud protested.

"…huh?" Elena blinked. Cloud only pointed up. Elena stared up at the whole in the roof. "ACKKK!" She grabbed the nearest towel and tied it around her.

"I'M STILL GONNA KILL YOU CLOUDDD!" Tifa yelled, landing on Cloud and clawing at him.

Cloud hissed and pulled on Tifa's hair. He bit Tifa's hand and kicked furiously while baring his teeth.

"…what the f***ing hell is wrong with them?" Cid asked.

"I don't know," Red XIII. "It's fun to watch, though!" Red XIII pulled out a flag that read Cloud on it seemingly out of nowhere. "Go Cloud!"

Cloud looked at Red XIII and smiled. "That's the spirit!"

"Oh no it's not!" Tifa yelled, lunging at Red XIII. A huge dust cloud began to build.

"You forgot about me, dammit!" Cloud growled, jumping into the dust cloud.

"AHEM!" the ignored and severely annoyed Elena said, standing at the doorway of the bathroom. "SOMEONE is trying to take a god damned shower ya know! Go away!"

Everybody stared at Elena. "Nah!" they all said in unison, gesturing their hands and watching the fight (or fighting).

Elena growled and stomped away, clenching her fists and teeth. "They won't get away with this…errr…"


Meanwhile, with Yuffie & Vincent…


"Oh, my love, how are we going to get out?" Yuffie asked, huddling up near Vincent.

"I do not know, my love, I do not know," was Vincent's only reply.

"We shall die in here, my love!" Yuffie cried, clinging onto Vincent's cape. She tore it off instead.

Vincent was speechless. "That…that was Ershin's!"

"Ershin?"

"She's my love from Breath of Fire IV!" Vincent cried. "ACK! THE AUTHOR'S MAKING ME SAY THIS! HELP ME! I'M NOT IN LOVE WITH A SOUL WHO LIVES INSIDE A PIECE OF ARMOR!"

"…" Yuffie just glared at him, silent with anger.

"It was the writer…I swear!" Vincent pleaded.

Oh, no, no, no, no…it's not the writer! You know you like Ershin! Bahahahaha! the author laughed insanely.

Yuffie's eyebrow twitched. "DIE YOU TWISTED BASTARD!" she roared and lunged at Vincent and bashed him over the head with her fist. "YOU CHEATED ON ME! I LOVED YOU SO!"

"But…but…but it was the writer!" Vincent's lip quivered.

"Well, the author's making me do this, but I enjoy it…" Yuffie said, a malicious grin spread across her face. "Hehehehe…I enjoy it…"

"…" Vincent tried to inch slowly away from Yuffie, but she quickly grabbed him.

"You're not going anywhere!" Yuffie said. "Mwehehehehe…! TICKLE TORTURE!"

"NOOOO!" Vincent cried. "DON'T BRING BACK THOSE MEMORIES WHEN HOJO WAS TICKLE TORTURING ME! NOOOO!"


Um, okay, let's hope everybody else is having better luck…


"Uh…" Cait blinked. "Go…Red?"

"WHAT?!" screamed Tifa & Cloud. "NOT RED!"

"Jealous that Mr. Hottie Cait Sith likes me better then you?" Red said, smiling.

Cloud and Tifa both threw VERY menacing glares at Red. "We're going to do this together…BUT ONLY THIS TIME!" Tifa said.

Cloud nodded and lunged at Red, followed by Tifa. "He called me…hot?" Cait just stared.

"I think so," Cid said.

"RED, HERE I COMEEEE!" Cait screamed, lunging into the dust cloud.

"I guess I'll root for one of these foo's," Barret said. "GO TIFA WITH YOUR BIG-"

"NOO! YOU GUYS ALL ARE ROOTING FOR CLOUD!" Cid yelled, waving a flag that read Cloud across it.

"NO WE DON'T!" Barret said. He aimed his gunarm at Cid. Cid took out his spear.

"EN GARDE!" Cid yelled.

"We aren't fencers," Barret said.

"Fine! DIE!" Cid screamed, lunging at Barret. Yet another dust cloud built up…


I REALLY don't think Vincent & Yuffie are having any better luck…


Laughter ran through the dungeon as Yuffie continued to tickle torture Vincent. "NO-OOO-OO!" Vincent managed to say. "ME-EE-RR-CYY!"

"Do you promise that you'll never cheat on me again?" Yuffie demanded.

"WE-E-EELL…!" Vincent said, but burst out laughing again.

"WELL WHAT?!" Yuffie said, tickling harder.

"I-I WO-ON'TT CH-EEA-T ON Y-OOU EE-VVERR AA-GAIN!" Vincent said.

Yuffie stopped. "Thank you!" she said, crossing her arms.

Vincent wheezed and coughed, holding his stomach. "We need to get outta here!" Vincent said.

"Gee, you just figured?" Yuffie said.

"Yeah," Vincent said.

"MY GOD…" Yuffie said. "You know, you're really-"

The cell door opened, revealing a short creature draped in robes. "Your time has come," it said. "Come with me…to your end…MWAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Vincent and Yuffie both looked at each other. "I love you, Yuffie!" Vincent clung onto Yuffie's arm, burying his face in her arm and crying.



Author's Notes: Weeeee. Third chapter. The first part of the chapter was coming from the insane midnight mind of mine. The rest is just right now. Reviews are still handy. This is probably gonna be a longgggg fanfic... *shrugs*