Disclaimer: I own this. I own the world. No wait I own the universe. I own
multiple meat factories and quite a few farms on the moon. I also own all of the authors in this story because they have all signed themselves and their lives over to me! BWHAHAHAHAHA!! SUE ME AND DIE A SLOW PAINFUL AGONISING DEATH!!

VIPER appears in front of the camera * hello and welcome to... * pause for
suspenseful dramatic effect * ... SURVIVOR.

These 16 lucky contestants have been chosen out of a HUGE 16 to compete for the mystery prize and the title of... * another pause (don't you just hate all them pauses) * ... ULTIMATE SURVIVOR! The two teams are VIPARIS and MAGWEEN please repeat that over and over before continuing. VIPARISMAGWEEN VIPERISMAGWEEN VIPERISMYQUEEN VIPER IS MY QUEEN! Thankyou and now you may continue to read on.


VIPARIS:

The evil cactus Nightcrawler
Coke Magneto
Slugzilla Iceman
Spotts1701 Gambit
Morrigan Mystique
Mara Rogue
Eve Wolverine
Phoenix Phoenix/Jean Grey

MAGWEEN:
GB His power and the ability to bite people whilst remaining adorably cute and loveable (NB. GB is a 7 inch tall flying marmoset)
:o) Psylocke
Natas Sabertooth
Lieutenant Slash Cannonball (NB. Name shortened to Slash)
I WANNA BE A JUBLEE Jubless/Jublees (NB. Her name will be shortened to IWBAJ)
Angel Her own (wings and ability to heal others)
Kittycatgurl Storm
Chillbreeze Archangel

Let's now continue on with the show. * camera zooms in on team MAGWEEN *
IWBAJ and :o) are fighting over a stick *
:o) : it's mine! I found it first!
IWBAJ: no you didn't, I did!
* Both continue to struggle until the stick breaks in half* (for those of you
that don't know, IWBAJ and :o) are sisters and there is A LOT of sibling rivalry between them). They look down at their halves of the stick *
:o): you got a bigger one than me
IWBAJ: nuh uh you like got a bigger one than me and that's like not fair
Slash: come on you two we have a shelter to bulid
:o) and IWBAJ: SHUT UP!
:o) uses telekinesis to pull down Slash's pants whilst IWBAJ blinds him with
some fireworks. Slash's pants fall down and he is wearing a pair of boxershorts with little love hearts and "Mummy's little boy!" written on them. Natas wolf whistles and everyone starts laughing except Chillbreeze because GB is trying to bite him and :o) isn't laughing either *
:o): you blinded me you stupid hussy!

Ahhh I don't know if your allowed to use language like that if fanfics :o). I
mean ya never know some little goody goody will most likely report us to Fido
*VIPER shudders * and then the story will get taken off. Please try again.

:o) : you blinded me too you stupid ... PERSON.
:o) and IWBAJ begin to fight AGAIN *
* Slash goes off to build the shelter on his own *
* Chillbreeze walks down to the water to admire himself *
Chillbreeze (to himself): well HEEEEEEEEEELLO there gorgeous.
Kittycatgurl (who thought he was talking to her): Hi. I'm kitty so uhhh... you like stuff *bats eyelashes and sits down on the sand in a model pose. Kitty commands the winds to blow her hair at just the right seductive level *

Camera cuts to team VIPARIS

Phoenix: I miss matt * head jerks to the side * I mean scott * jerk* matt...

*theevilcactus: * BAMF's * around gleefully.*

theevilcactus: I've got blue fur * rubs arm aganst cheek * I'M DISHY! DISHY!
DISHY! DISHY!
* slugzilla is sitting up in a tree *
eve: are you gonna come down, bub.
slugzilla: there's salt everywhere AHHHHHHHHH SALT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO * climbs
further up the tree. The branch he was sitting on breaks and he falls to the
sand *
slugzilla: AHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOOO the salt it's burning me ahhhh help someone. Please help me ahhhhhh!
Mara: what's his problem?
eve shrugs and eve and mara walk off to go help coke build the shelter *
coke: MWHAHAHAHAHA the world... I mean the shelter is mine you shall all obey... I mean help me finish building it. it shall be my secret hide out for my world domination plans
*mara and eve give each other "what the" looks and leave to go find the message for the days challenge *

*Spotts is charging up trees and letting them blow up *
Spotts: WOO HOO more fire wood *continues to blow up the trees *
* unknown to everyone morrigan is planning a very tricky plan which involves a lot of trouble *

*mara and eve walk back with the challenge *

mara reads the challenge out: I'm too tired to think of something witty. Like a stupid rhyming ditty. If you obey the rules and me fully. You will win immunitully.

Camera cuts too the two teams glaring at each other. Both are wearing tribal
war blood so kindly supplied to them by Mike from Survivor Blood Wears Pty. Ltd.

*GB is now trying to bite Angel.*
Angel: get him off me * tries to fly away but GB follows * ARGHHHHHHHHH

Anyhoe the challenge today is whoever can't come up with a rhyming word's team loses. We'll start with you VIPARIS. Your word is numb.

The evil cactus: bum * all children readers begin to giggle uncontrollably along with IWBAJ *
Mara: gum
Coke: world dominatyum
Chillbreeze: THAT'S NOT A WORD
Coke: is too
VIPER: shhhhh
Slugzilla: AHHHHHH NOT THE SALT GET AWAY
VIPER: ok so he passes
Spotts1701: gum
:o) : that's already been said
VIPER: would the other team please shut up, please shut up, please shut up.
Morrigan: planetarium
* everyone gasps at the brand new intelligence of the show *
Eve: sum
Phoenix: matt

What an interesting round and now it is MAGWEEN's turn. Your word is orange.
:o): but there isn't a single word in the English language that rhymes with
orange.
* another gasp at the intellect of some of the contestants *
IWBAJ: like yeah there is, Guchi, rhymes with orange
:o): no it doesn't!
IWBAJ: like yuh huh
* IWBAJ and :o) begin to fight again *
*IWBAJ shoots out fireworks and accidently blinds herself as well *
IWBAJ: like owww I hurt my eyes, I like need a doctor
VIPER: *shrugs shoulders * sorry budget cuts.
* Natas runs around flapping his arms whilst slugzilla rolls around on the sand yelling *
slugzilla: AHHHHHH THE SALT it's down my pants burning burning ahhhhhhh!
morrigan: why don't you try freezing the area that's burning.
* slugzilla shoots snowballs into his pants *
slugzilla: (breathing a sigh of relief) That's better... AHHHHHHHHHH frost bite owie owie owie on my ooowie.

Screen goes blank

* VIPER suddenly appears *

well that was a bit chaotic, BWHAHAHAHAH MY EVIL PLAN IS WORKING, shut up I'm
trying to write for the moment here and I thought we had a reasonable agreement, we'd all conquer the universe together, BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I AM INVISIBLE. Anyhoe I've decided that both teams shall vote a person out seeing as it is a hard decision as to who should win.

At tribal council

Ok everyone vote time cause I don't wanna beat around the infamous bush talking about what your opinions are cause frankly my dear I don't give a damm

VIPARIS votes first

VIPARIS:
The evil cactus: I'm voting off Spotts cause I've got blue fur and I'm DISHY!
DISHY! DISHY! DISHY!


Morrigan: I'm voting off Slugzilla because he has Iceman's power and Iceman is an X-Man and Mystique is evil and I am Mystique, and consequentially am a
heartless bitch. Plus, he seemed somewhat inconsequential to my grand schemes. AND, I can impersonate him any time I want so to heck with the real thing.

Phoenix: I'm voting off me because I'm in internet denial and miss matt * jerk * scott *jerk * matt

Let's count the votes
Slugzilla
Phoenix
Coke
Spotts
Spotts
Slugzilla
Ok this is the vote that counts. We have 2 votes spotts 2 votes slugzilla 1
vote coke and 1 vote phoenix
And the first contestant off survivor is...* yet another dramatic pause * Spotts
The tribe has spoken and they want you to piss off so drag your miserable carkas off of my island and if I see you back here you die.

MAGWEEN's time to vote

:o) : I WANNA BE A JUBLEE for the obvious reasons

I WANNA BE A JUBLEE: :o)

Angel: GB cause he keeps trying to bite me however he is adorable and cute

Let's count the votes
GB * VIPER glares cause they want to vote off her liddle baby *
GB
GB
:o)
I WANNA BE A JUBLEE
GB
GB

GB the tribe has spoken and I missed you and the radioactive jumper and glupy
the giant flying goldfish don't keep me much company not to mention how
unsociable the undernourished rabid koala's are so I wuv you and I nevwer want to see you weave me agwain.
*GB and VIPER glare at everyone for voting GB off *
VIPER: YOU'LL ALL PAY FOR THIS!!!!

NEXT TIME ON ... *another irritating dramatic pause* SURVIVOR
Will VIPER punish MAGWEEN for voting GB off?
Will :o) and IWBAJ continue to fight?
What's the deal with Slugzilla?
What is Morrigan's evil plan?
When will I stop asking stupid questions?
NEXT TIME WEEK ... * yet ANOTHER irritating dramatic pause* SURVIVOR



OK THAT WAS THE FIRST CHAPTER. Please review it or I'll personally see to your death because I have a special scanner that says who has read my stories and if you don't review you shall become a meat pie. BWHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!!

COULD THE AUTHORS PLEASE E-MAIL ME ASAP WITH WHO THEY WANT VOTED OFF NEXT TIME SO IT DOESN'T TAKE SO LONG!