Night Watch: Past and Future
by Sango-sama

Disclaimer: I do not own Inu-Yasha. He belongs to Rumiko Takahashi. Also to Higurashi Kagome,
and Kikyo but that's a another legal battle for another day. I'm only borrowing the other
characters.

Spoiler Warnings: Up to and includings Chapters 206-207 in the manga. Much futher
than the anime currently. If you don't mind spoilers, there is a bit of review so
it is not necessary to go out and try to read all the manga first.

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Aside from the hell-born mosquitoes and the cold, the fire draws the attention
of passing youkai to the shards we carry, just as the North Star acts as a compass in
the night sky. It is for this very reason that I am taking my turn for the watch,
shivering in spite of my battle gear and my woolen yukata. Sitting and staring into
the fire to keep myself awake, I can't help but think of my past.

I have very few happy memories. Now, that's not to say I had an unhappy child-
hood; quite the contrary really. We'd all sit around the fire and laugh and talk. Kohaku
and I would sing and play, but father and the village were always busy with their work.
Whenever a demon was near, our town could never rest. We perpetually waged a war with the
demons for the ability to have a normal life. My mother gave her life for that fight.

We all ate, slept, and breathed demon-slaying, training from a very young age to see
weaknesses and how to defend ourselves. And yet, here I am today, travelling with a half-demon.
One who, to twist the knife of irony, has saved my life. Now granted, it wasn't always
willingly, but he never tries to openly hurt humans unless they harm him--or someone dear
to him. It sometimes makes me wonder--maybe in all the time I was hunting demons, that I was
hurting someone like him, someone who didn't deserve the fate that my village, that I, gave to
them.

Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if we had lived in another town.
Would I have become a demon hunter? Would I have had friends? Would I have met Kagome?
Or Inu Yasha? Or Houshi-sama?

Everything in past makes me question my present. My own brother was turned against my
father and I by a truly evil half-youkai named Naraku. He succeeded in killing Dad, and.....
almost me, too.

I still love Kohaku though...I very nearly killed him because he was being continually
used as Naraku's puppet. He had almost killed Kagome--who has become like a sister to me--
under Naraku's command. I couldn't let him go on living under the control of that...that monster. I wouldn't be able to live with myself, nor would I let him die alone. But Inu Yasha stopped me before I was too late for both of us. He somehow saw that part of my brother was still trapped inside, blocking out the memories he had been forced to do.

My friends were very nearly killed trying to help me--not that it's different with
most of the other adventures we have as we travel around, looking for shards of the Shinkon
no Tama--and that bastard Naraku. But everyone was genuinely concerned for me--even Houshi-sama.
Everyone...like it's natural, are together for each other...helping each other.

Perhaps, I should stop calling him Houshi-sama and rather by his name. Miroku...hmmm...
it's not as if I don't know him, at least not anymore. He went so far as to put himself in
harm's way by sucking up Naraku's Saimyoushou into the abyss in his hand-for me. I swear
that I cannot understand how that man can be incredibly loyal and kind-hearted one moment
and then grabbing at my ass the next. It's really sad that he still does that in spite of
the fact that I'm the one who best understands his problems: both our fathers have died at
the hands of Naraku's manipulations. We both have times where we are very alone and it
seems that no one can reach us; lately of course, we have become quite accustomed to our
'little family' and only when Naraku shows up to try once again to ruin our lives do we
become depressive.

In spite of the little family we all have formed, there are still times when I feel
horribly alone. Like now. The brisk air around me doesn't bother me as much as the stark
coldness inside.

The air around me starts to get a little hazy and find myself longing for the softness
of my futon, for the time to release the tension that this forced alertness has wrought on
my muscles, for the warmth of the blanket that I'm going to swipe from Hou-...from Miroku
when I wake him up for his turn at watch. It's all entirely too tempting.

But I have to stay awake. Eyelids drooping, I sit with my head resting on my arms.
And wonder. I think things could be very different. Maybe if he made some effort to
restrain himself, then just maybe things would be very different. I wouldn't be quite
so alone at times like these. He is almost very noble. Hmmmm....Miroku....what if...
what if he ever did restrain himself? What then? A chill runs down my back.

Perhaps I'm thinking too much. My eyelids truly feel altogether too heavy and my
head is starting to hurt.

I slowly crawl over to the tree where Miroku sleeps and shake his shoulder to nudge
him from his slumber. "Hey...Houshi-sama. It's your turn for watch." He shakes off my
hand and rolls over. "Houshi! C'mon...it's my turn to sleep." Slowly one eye-lid opens
and looks my way, pouting much too cutely for someone lacking as much innocence.

"Five more minutes...please?" and buried himself under the protection one of Kagome's
extra blankets, turning his head away from me.

"Ummm..." Waitaminute! I just thought that was cute, right? I definitely need sleep.
Yes, sleep is good...sleep keeps me from thinking this much. "Uh...no, Miroku, I don't think
I can keep my eyes open much longer. You need to wake up." And with that I swiped the blanket.


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Random Insanity from the author (and her muse):
1. This will (hopefully) be a series.
2. The narrator will in all likelihood change from chapter to chapter. The next one may not
change...I have to decide who's perception would be more "telling."
3. This story was brought to you today by the letter "X" and the number "4".
4. The narrator currently has gotten caffiene and has finished her laundry. She is now a happy
monkey! ^_^ More will be written in later chapters. Possibly this evening.
5. My muse has found my candy stash...uh-oh. -_-

A Schnee! Production
by Sango-sama