Author: Silver Miko
E-mail: silvermoon510@hotmail.com

THE WACKY ADVENTURES OF THE CRAZY SENSHI
Part 5

----------------------------------------------------------------------------



" Donna koto mo yareba tachiku jaana senai......" Minako sang loudly. " Minako-chan..... URUSAI!" Hotaru yelled. " But I'm bored. We've been driving for like a day......." Minako sighed. " Guys, come on. Almost half an hour to go........ WHAT THE HELL?!" Michiru yelled. Looking ahead they saw the worst thing imaginable.
Bumper to bumper traffic jam.

" NOOOO! NOT TRAFFIC!!!" everyone yelled. Hotaru finally broke down. " That's it....... I can't take this anymore..... Saturn Planet Power, make up!!!" Hotaru yelled transforming. " Woah, so that's what it looks like when she transforms." Minako said. " SAILOR TELEPORT!!!" Nothing happened. " DAMNIT! GET ME OUT OF HERE!" she said shaking her Silence Glaive. " SATURN! NOT THE GLAIVE!!" Haruka said dodging it's point.


" Damn, traffic. Looks bad." Ami said. " NO! Well, Mamoru is out there somewhere! I WILL get him yet." " Yeah, right... Taiki-san, maybe we should just forget about him and get the hell out of here." " Someone's got to watch him. He's snapped." " He's beyond snapped." Ami said. " SHHH!!!!!! Rhino the Traffic Bitch is ON!" Seiya yelled. " Well, the Tokyo Turnpike is blocked with nasty bumper to bumper traffic that's going to take a LOOOOONG time to get through. Folks, stay in town. Now back for the 106.9 weather report....." " Darn. And Traffic Bitch never lies!" Seiya said punching the steering wheel.


" Damn, Rhino's right." Yaten said. " Well, how about charades." " NO! IEIE IEIEIE! Enough of this! I want out!" Minako said SD mode. " Minako-chan! Stop it!" Haruka yelled. " I can't help it. I think I left the iron on at my house." " Well now that's a different story." " Yup....... doot doot doot doot doot doot doot doot dooooot ITSU DATTE WATASHI YO!!!!!" Minako said singing. " STOP IT! That's it, Blanky time!" Hotaru said. She grabbed the spare blanket under her seat and covered the way back up. " There, she's REALLY annoying me." " What good will that do?" " Out of sight out of mind." Hotaru said.

" Okay, now for the pinkie toe." Ami said painting the little toe with her ice blue nail polish. " Ah....... done! Just need to the let it dry. " How long will that take?" Taiki asked. " A few minutes." Taiki wiggled his toes. " Ooh! What a pretty color you chose. Thanks for painting my toe nails Ami-chan." Taiki said grinning. " No problem." " HA! The car in front of us moved a millimeter! I'm closer to my goal!" Seiya said laughing a messed up Kuno laugh.

" I'm hungry." Mamoru said. " Me too." Yuuichirou said. " YEAH!" Haruka and Michiru said. Everyone looked at Setsuna. " Nani? Why are you looking at me?" " Well, you keep making ice cream bars appear? How?! GET US SOME!" Yuuichirou whined. " Well, actually I just get them from my stock at the Time Gate.... fine." she made a few boxes appear. " YIPPPEEEEEEEE!" " Minako-chan, Yaten-kun, want any?" Mamoru asked. " Ie! We're already getting some......" Minako said. " Huh?" Mamoru asked puzzled. He shrugged it off and ate the ice cream.
Soon honking was heard. " What's that? What's going on?" Setsuna asked. " I don't know. It's liked everyone is honking at something. " Uuuuuuuumiiiii ga Hirooo aaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagaaaaaRUUUUUUU!!!!!!!" Minako was nearly screaming as she sang strangely. " What the? She's really off key." Michiru said. " WAIT A SEC!!!!" Hotaru said. She peeked through the blankie and gasped. " What is it Hotaru-chan?" Haruka asked. " Don't ask me! Ask them in the back!" Hotaru said blushing.
Curious, Yuuichirou pulled the blanket off as Minako and Yaten eeped. Everyone in the car got bug eyed. Both in the way back were in quite a state of undress. Yaten got in front of Minako. " IE! Don't look at her!!!" " That's not where WE'RE looking..." Haruka and Michiru said holding up binoculars. Yaten sweatdropped. " Hmmm...... I'm much better built that you, Yaten-kun." Mamoru said casually as he began to look through the H-manga. " Hmmmm.... ideas for Usako and me..... oh.. did that... did that.... did that..... no. oh wait." he turned it upside down. " Yup, did that too......."
Suddenly Minako noticed something. A few teenage boys were gawking at her from the back windows of the wagon. " AH! Yaten-kun!" she yelled hugging against his back. " STOP LOOKING YOU PERVERTS!!" Yaten yelled. " OI OI! IT's YATEN KOU OF THREE LIGHTS!!!" one guy yelled. Suddenly a reporter appeared. " Yaten-kun! Who is this girl? Are the Three Lights re-united, can I have your number?!" the guy said spasmatically. " GOD DAMNIT! THIS IS WHY I QUIT SINGING!" Yaten said. " Oi oi Yaten-kun....... SEXYY!" Haruka said as Michiru whistled. Yaten realized he was pretty was revealed to everyone in the car. " ECCHI!!" he yelled.
" Okay okay... I'll take care of this." Hotaru said. " SILENT WALL!" she made an opaque wall as Minako and Yaten quickly dressed. " STAR SERIOUS LASER!!!!!!!!!" the car shook. " SHIT! SEIYA!" Haruka yelled. Everyone but Yuuichirou transformed. " DON'T HURT MY CAR!" Sailor Mercury said standing on the roof of the 3 Lights mobile.
" Star Sensitive Inferno!!!!!" Healer yelled hurtling her attack towards Fighter. " HEALER YOU BITCH! You've betrayed Maker and I?!" "AW SHUT UP YOU DAMN LOSER! By the way...... nice hair." Healer said snickering. Fighter fumed as the other senshi laughed their asses off. " Okay, I'm READY FOR HIM! World Shaking!" Fighter screamed as she fell off the car hood and landed on her ass. " OWWIEEE!" she said.
" Deep Submerge!" "Dead Scream!" " Venus Love and Beauty Shock!" " Silence Glaive Surprise!" " Mercury Aqua Rhapsody!" " Star Gentle Uterus!" " UTERUS?!!!!!!" the crowd yelled in disgust and shock. " Dude, what's with that?" " What a f*cked up attack." the crowd whispered. " OH SHUT UP!" Maker yelled. Fighter was pissed. " MERCURY! MAKER! WHY'D YOU ATTACK ME!" Fighter screamed. " Well, everyone else was." " ARG!!!" Fighter yelled as something white fell out of her mouth. " Oh my.... Fighter...... you're fronth tooth." Fighter licked her teeth. And noticed her front tooth was missing. " MY TOOTH!" she saw Tuxedo Kamen. " YOU ASSHOLE! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" Fighter screamed running at Tuxedo Kamen.
He jumped out of the way and pinned Fighter to a highway sign with his roses. " Bitch bitch bitch. That's all you EVER do Seiya." Uranus said as they jumped into the funmobile. After blasting out some of the highway railing, Haruka droved through it and onto the highway grass and sped off. " HARUKA! THIS IS ILLEGAL!" Setsuna yelled. " COOL!" Minako said grinning.

" ARG!" Fighter yelled as Mercury and Maker freed her. They got back into the Three Lights mobile and de-transformed. " THAT ASS! I'm going to kill him!" " NO DA! THAT WHAT YOU'VE BEEN SAYING SINCE PART 1!" Ami and Taiki yelled.

Silver: Aren't I sooooo evil?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

WOOHOO! Another one done. The song Minako sings in the beginning, and the 'itsu datte watashi yo' part is the song "Winner" from Fushigi Yuugi. The song she screams out while uh, bleeping Yaten, is 'Route Venus'.
The traffic jam came to me during a class of mine.
'Rhino the Traffic Bitch' IS a REAL person. He's the traffic guy for 106.9 'THe Rock'. HE SOOOOOO COOL! But this station is in the NY, NJ, CT Tri-state area I think.

As always, I have to give all credit for inspiration and stuff to: my f*cked up imagination, my f*cked up sense of humor, Lianne Sentar and Amithyst, Nightbreak, the guys who run Shinji's Vault of Anime MSTings, my fans, Coca Cola, Takeuchi Naoko, Watase Yuu, Toriyama Akira, the dudes who do Slayers, Midorikawa Hikaru, Furuya Tohru, Hayashibara Megumi, etc etc (Anime seiyuu), Vegete-chan who rules (HURRY UP WITH Z BALL DRAGON! SO FUNNY!), Chikara- Kikite- Yume- Kouri- Kurai- Kimura- etc. who run Fushigi Yuugi no Website, Millennium Guard, Lunar Rose (PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE FINISH YOUR STORIES!!!) etc etc. And now, I'm going to eat and bitch out Cartoon Network for starting DBZ at ' Arrival of Radditz' AGAIN EVEN THOUGH THE NEWER EPISODES SHOULD BE DONE!!!!!!!!! Ja ne.....