Moony

Well everyone, I've certainly taken long enough with this story. Hope you enjoy it—and please review…especially if you think it needs improvement, or if you have any plot ideas. You can email me anytime too, at stanzi82@aol.com

~*Moony*~

Chapter 1

"Katherine, we will just have to wait and see. They are getting a new headmaster now, and maybe--"

"Michael, they know what he is, it's on their records," she said, wiping tears out of her eyes. "It might have been possible if we hadn't tried to get him admitted before. They wouldn't have known what...he was."

"We could not have kept that a secret, and you know it, Katherine. It's against wizarding law!" Michael exclaimed, holding tightly onto his wife's shoulders. He faced her and spoke quietly, with darkness in his voice. "It'd be Azkaban for us—and think what will happen to Remus."

Katherine pulled away from her husband and began sobbing wildly, in a fit of emotion. "I don't care, Michael! They can't discriminate against him this way!" She stopped mid-fury and collapsed into her chair, quietly sobbing with her hands covering her face. "He's a normal boy, its only that...Dear God, it isn't his fault..."

They continued to talk, now in hushed voices. Upstairs, a young boy sat up, wide-eyed, in bed. He could hear the voices downstairs, and he felt sick to his stomach.

Because I'm not...not normal.

He knew his parents loved him, but neither they nor anyone else had been able to help. He could still remember when he was small, when it had first happened…

When he was small, nobody ever told him what was wrong with him. He remembered strangers always coming, making him answer strange questions. They poked and prodded, and made him drink all sorts of horrible concoctions. For the longest time he had not known the reason why.

He knew that at a certain time every month, his mother would lock him up in the attic. The vivid memories came back to his as ghosts—chilling, and somehow still alive.

He saw the tears on his mother's face as she drew the curtains of the large, empty room. She would hug and kiss him, whispering, "I love you, I love you...I'm sorry..." and she would hold him tenderly in her warm embrace for a few lingering moments...And then she would be gone, the door locked behind her, shutting him in suffocating darkness.

Screaming and crying, he would bang wildly at the door. He was deathly afraid of the darkness closing in on him. He would scream, louder and louder, and then suddenly it wasn't him anymore. It was some other horrible, savage sound, a sound he could not be making--and he felt himself go rigid, his bones seemed to contort, and then he always blacked out.

He would wake up the next morning--he always woke up with the morning sunlight, as if it was impossible to awaken while it was dark--and felt dizzy, and in excruciating pain. When he looked around him, he would always see the room ravaged, ripped and torn apart, as if some kind of mad beast had let loose his fury on the room. Looking at his hands, there would always be bloody scratches and puncture wounds. And he wondered what had happened, for he could not remember a thing.

When he had been that young, there had been nothing to do but go along with it. But now he was almost eleven years old, and he understood. And not a day went by that Remus Lupin did not ask himself why.

~*~

Remus walked down to breakfast early the next morning, having been awakened by the smell of bacon frying and the sounds of pots clattering downstairs. He rubbed his eyes and yawned sleepily as he entered the kitchen. His mother was hovering over the stove, humming softly to herself. Remus took a deep breath. Waffles and bacon, he thought, and smiled out loud.

Katherine Lupin must have heard her son breathe, for she turned from her place near the stove. She smiled and wrapped Remus in a warm hug. "Good morning, love," she said tenderly.

" 'Morning, Mum," Remus replied, still bleary-eyed.

"Well, go on and sit down. The waffles will be ready soon." Katherine turned her attention back to the stove.

"'Morning, Remus," said Michael as he entered the room. He looked very haggard, as though he had not slept at all the night before. He sat down at the table across from Remus, rubbing his face with his hands. Remus watched in silence, feeling once again that somehow this was his fault. He knew his parents loved him dearly, and thus he could never get up the nerve to tell them how he felt.

Katherine directed the platters of waffles and bacon to the table with a wave of her wand. Remus reached for them immediately and proceeded to load up his plate with as many waffles as it would hold. They were, after all, his favorite food.

Michael chuckled. "Whoa there! I hope you're planning to finish all of that!" he exclaimed. Remus tried to speak, but his mouth was stuffed with waffle.

Just then, the family owl zoomed in with the morning post. The owl, whose name was Tog—short for Torgrellius—circled the table once before dropping the day's issue of The Daily Prophet in front of Michael, and Witch Weekly for Katherine. Tog flew to Remus, taking a little piece of waffle before flying out the window again.

Michael grunted and read a few of the headlines aloud in between gulps of tea. "Hogsmeade is going to elect a new mayor," he read.

Katherine grunted placidly, and Remus continued to work at the decreasing pile of waffles on his plate.

"Someone tried to rob Gringotts two days ago…seems they walked into a room that was cursed and came back with their limbs—ah—rearranged."

Remus snorted slightly. It was funny—somebody who had their legs where their arms should be, and their arms on top of their head. But then he thought of himself and really didn't think he had any business laughing.

"Oh, and, ah--" Michael stopped to sip his tea "—Hogwarts school begins in two weeks, so Diagon Alley is starting the usual preparations for the big rush—stocking up on extra cauldrons and robes…apparently they ran out last year--"

He was interrupted by Katherine standing up and banging plates together as she began clearing the empty dishes from the table. She turned her face away from his, and walked quickly into the kitchen. Michael and Remus sat in an uncomfortable silence for several minutes.

Suddenly a burst of feather shot into the room, seeming to come out of nowhere. It was Tog, looking as though he had just flown a hundred miles in five minutes. He dropped a large roll of parchment in the middle of the table. Remus got up and gave Tog a bowl of water and a few cookies, then sat back down.

Katherine, hearing the commotion, reentered the kitchen dining room. Her eyes moved back and forth from the parchment to Remus. It was Michael who spoke first; in an almost pointed voice. "Go ahead and open it, Katherine."

He folded up his newspaper and looked at her.

She looked up, and both of them noticed her red and puffy eyes. "Yes…" she said, taking a deep breath to steady her voice. "It's probably just another letter…from Aunt Fiona down in Cornwall…" She picked up the piece of parchment and unrolled it. She put a hand to her mouth. Her eyes ran frantically back and forth, reading the lines, and then she shut her eyes as tears began to fill them.

"Oh…" she was unable to speak.

"What…is it, Mum?" Remus asked quietly.

Katherine opened her eyes, breathed deeply, and slowly began to read.

HOGWARTS SCHOOL

of WITCHCRAFT and WIZARDRY

Newly appointed Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore

(Order of Merlin, 1st Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock,

Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards)

We are very pleased to inform you that your son, Remus J. Lupin, has been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment. Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31.

Yours sincerely,

Minerva McGonagall

Deputy Headmistress

A smaller note fluttered out from between the printed manuscripts. Katherine read it to herself slowly.

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Lupin,

I am most proud that your son Remus will be attending Hogwarts. I know that he will be a fine student, and I greatly look forward to the year.

I must inform you that due to your son's condition, we must take special precautions. I will explain more in following.

Yours Sincerely,

Albus Dumbledone

When Katherine finished reading, a pin could have been heard dropping in the kitchen. Remus broke the silence by whispering,

"I'm…actually going?" His eyes were wide with disbelief.

Katherine and Michael rushed to hug their son. Their dreams had come true at last.

Chapter 2

Remus stood at the platform nine and three-quarters, at the King's Cross station in London. He looked nervously around, watching the other children and their parents. He sorely wished that he wasn't a first-year at Hogwarts. Clutching his books tightly to his chest, he used a free hand to smooth his robes for the umpteenth time that day.

It had been fun getting all his supplies in Diagon Alley. He had gone with his father; his first real trip that he could remember. First they had gone to Flourish and Blotts for his books, and then to Madam Malkin for his wizard robe. He insisted on wearing it the rest of the day. And then to amazing Ollivanders, where he had gotten his wand. It was a beautiful 12-inch ebony with phoenix feather ("Excellent for transformation, and quite satisfactory in the area of defense," Mr. Ollivander had said).

The only problem had arisen when he had gone into Catalan's Concoctions and Crafts to look at the new Remembrall, after begging and begging his father. The moment Remus walked in, every Sneakoscope in the place began furiously beeping, blinking, and spinning. He had run out of the store, embarrassed, with the owner yelling, red-faced, after him.

Remembering the incident at Catalan's, Remus's heart began to fill up with dread once more. He had been troubled enough about Hogwarts already, and now he was even more worried as he once again recalled the circumstances under which he would be allowed to attend. Dumbledore must be a great man indeed to admit him, but how would they be able to control him when he transformed? What if they weren't able to handle him and he hurt someone? He would be expelled, and probably sent away for the rest of his life.

"Now Remus, remember what I told you," said his father, bringing Remus's mind back to the crowded, noisy platform. "Just get on the train, follow instructions and you'll be fine. Dumbledore will call you to speak with him. He has written me and he said he would do so."

"Uh-huh," Remus said, his eyes darting back and forth between the train and his father.

"Dumbledore is a great man; you don't have to worry." His father smiled reassuringly. "Alright then, Remus?" Michael Lupin paused for a moment. Then he put his hands on his son's shoulders and spoke seriously. "Remus, I'm very proud of you. Your mother and I both are." He held Remus's shoulders firmly. "This is no less than what you deserve. Don't let anyone tell you anything different." He wrapped his son in an embrace, and Remus felt tears come. He wanted so much to believe his father, but...

Toot! Toot! The Hogwarts Express blew its final boarding whistle. Children stampeded to the doors as parents waved their goodbyes. "Well, that's the last call. I love you, Remus. You'll have a wonderful time." Michael smiled.

"Goodbye, Dad," Remus answered, with as much determination as he could muster. Then he picked up his suitcase and ran to the train.

~*~

Remus got on a car towards the back of the train. There weren't very many people on the car--only a small group of older students playing a game of some sort on the opposite end of the car. Remus guessed that they were at least fifth-years. He had nothing better to do, so he listened to their conversation while pretending to be asleep. It was pretty boring--just a lot of gossip about some witch in some music group who was arrested by the Ministry of Magic for indecent charming--until they started talking about Hogwarts.

"I wonder what the new headmaster'll be like," said one boy.

"My dad says he's really old--and gone a bit round the bend--but he's a nice one," said a girl.

The same boy answered, "I don't care one way or another as long as he doesn't march up and down the halls slapping detentions on people like ol' Dippet."

Another boy piped up. "Me dad reckons they'll be expectin' more people to Hogwarts which aren't like us."

"You mean like half-bloods?" asked the first girl.

"Yeah, but other people too. Like former squibs, pygmies, giants...maybe even werewolves--"

Remus felt sick to his stomach. He curled up even more on the plush seat, trying to shrink back even farther from view.

"Come off it, not werewolves. That'd be putting the whole school out to be killed...Besides, there aren't any more werewolves in these parts anymore. I read somewhere that they all moved north years ago."

Remus just hoped he would never give anyone reason to doubt that all the werewolves had gone to Scotland. He must've slept for a while after that, because the next thing he heard was the Hogwarts Express conductor's voice saying, "Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, fifteen minutes out." Remus pulled out his brand-new black cape and pulled it over his head.