Author: Lax

Author: Lax

Subject: Harry Potter

Title: Bad Angel: Prologue

Description: Song fic, some sap.

Pairings: None quite yet, but Draco had feelings for Harry (bum bum BUM!)

Disclaimer: I don't own the Harry Potter guys, Warner Brothers and JK Rowling does. Which really sucks, cause I wanted to name my band Slytherin (when I actually FORM the band) ::cries::. Anyway, they're those peoples. I'm just borrowing them, abusing them, and having fun with them for now ^.^. And No, I did not write that beautiful song. It belongs to Good Charlotte, and its called "Change" off their self-titled album. I highly recommend that CD.

All responses are encouraged and suggested, in other words, review!. Flames are mean, immature, and disposed of by means of digestion.

Thank you, and have a nice day.

Bad Angel: Prologue

[I am lost in the see through

I think you lost yourself too]

I was always looking at him. I surprised no ones ever seemed to notice how much I did, too, because when I saw him, it was impossible for me to take my eyes off him.

[Throughout all of this confusion

I hope I some how get to you]

His eyes sparkled like emeralds. Hs scar glowed as sweat trickled down his cheek, messy patches of dark black hair clinging to his face as he stirred the thickening potion at a slow, unsteady pace. Next to him sat Ron Weasley, a tall, gangly, red-haired boy with more siblings than countable with the fingers on one hand.

[I've practiced all the things I'd say to tell you how I feel

But when I finally get my chance it all seems so surreal]

His speed quickened as the potion became thinner, his lips spreading into a smile of relief and his breath going back to its normal pace.

[Cause from the first time I met you I never could forget you

I didn't know you I wanted to hold on to

The things you'd never say to me]

Staring at him like this made me feel so at ease, so in tune with myself. I wanted nothing more to hold his skinny body in my arms and kiss his smile. I was in love with him from the very beginning, not actually realizing it until last year, when I swear I saw him grin at me. When I saw that, I knew I was in love. I knew I was gay before that, but I didn't know the first person I would fall in love with was him. And I know its love, because I've never felt anything like this before.

[You can't change the way you feel

But you can't tell me this ain't real cause this is real]

The fact that I have him to think about every night is pretty much what keeps me sane. My life is absolute turmoil and chaos. I live in the shadow of my brilliant, pretty older sister, and with my father as an important Ministry member, I had to make him proud of me so he wouldn't get angry with me. It's hard to live up to his standards. And with my mother and father as Death Eaters, I'm expected to share the same views as them, when I really don't. When my sister said she wasn't joining the Death Eaters, my dad practically disowned her. I wish I could be like her and stand up to him, but I can't.

 

And one thing lingers in my mind: Could the famous Harry Potter ever fall in love with me, let alone be gay?

The answer to those questions: Doubtful.

[Now you've got me watching your eyes

Got me waiting just to see

If it goes the way it never will

Your eyes are watching me]

First of all, I'm a supposed Death Eater. Yeah, like Harry Potter would ever fall in love with someone who supports their enemy. I mean, I know I don't really support You Know Who, but the fact my family is lingers on in rumourville and no ones realizes how I actually feel.

[Now you've got me thinking bout the first time that I met you

Standing in a crowded room but I could only see you]

Secondly, we got off to a bad start. I made an enemy of him of the Hogwarts Express, or so it was apparent to people that witnessed the ordeal. But all that actually did for me was make me spark interest in him. That same spark made me think about being gay, and that same spark made me love him like I do right now. All it did for him was made him hate me. And I treated him the same way so no one would know now I actually felt.

[And I hope my words will get through cause now I can't forget you

I want to tell you if only I could reach you

And make you feel this way]

For those reasons, he would and probably would never love me. My life is so forbidden: gay and evil. Two words that shouldn't be mixed. But its who I am as a person, and I've grown to accept it.

[You can't change the way you feel

But you can't tell me this is real cause this is real]

Sometimes those two words makes me sometimes cry, sometimes laugh, sometimes choke. I've accepted who I am, but can any accept me for who I am if I told everyone? That I wasn't evil? That I was GAY? I could get expelled. A gay person? In Hogwarts? Yeah, right. Dumbledore wouldn't have it.

And that's why I'm sitting here and thinking. Because it depresses me. And me loving him is what's keeping me alive.

"Mr. Malfoy, look at me when I'm talking, please." Professor Snape said, looking at me. Harry and Ron snickered.

"Sorry, Professor." I answered, throwing a look of death at Ron and Harry, who returned it.

[In the end it's all I've got

So I'm going to hold on]