Chapter 1: "If Only I Had Been There"

Chapter 1: "If Only I Had Been There"

Dick Grayson blinked and he was now in what he recognized as Wayne Manor. He looked around as the figure led him into one of the bedrooms. There, he saw, sat Tim Drake.

Tim's face and hands were ashen and green hair still sprouted along with his own jet black coloring. He lay, also unmoving on the bed, his eyes fixed on the television in front of the bed. The corners of his mouth twitched painfully.

Dick turned to the figure. "Nothing's changed?" He asked in a small voice. Am I really useless? Can I really do nothing?

"With Tim, no. But he was not the only person affected." She walked back out the door and as Dick followed her, they entered another room.

"The Cave," Dick recognized. The figure only nodded as they walked down the steps. Entering the main part of the Cave, Dick saw Bruce Wayne sitting at the massive computer. That was the first thing that shocked him. "But Bruce never comes down here out of costume."

The figure cocked her head to him. "Things change."

Dick looked closer and saw that Bruce didn't even look like himself anymore. He was, Dick suspected, thirty pounds underweight, as if he hadn't eaten in months. His face was gaunt and large bags encircled his eyes.

"Lost them both," Bruce muttered to himself, looking at some pictures on the desk. "Lost them all."

"What does he mean?" Dick asked the figure, craning to look at the pictures.

She touched his shoulder and began walking again. "Another stop first."

She turned the corner and Dick followed, now finding himself in another place all together. He looked around, trying to place the setting, as he followed the figure into a room.

His jaw went taught, holding back tears as he saw Barbara Gordon. She was in a wheelchair, sitting at her desk. She too looked thinner, unkempt.

"The Joker still got to her?"

The figure nodded sadly as someone walked in behind them. Dick recognized the woman as Barbara's friend Lana. Barbara looked up from her desk.

"Lana… what are you doing here?"

Lana sat down on the bed next to the desk. "Abusing the privileges of having a key to your apartment."

"I'm trying to get work done…" Barbara said feebly as she turned back to her desk.

"Nuh-uh. Not gonna work, Babs."

Barbara's head flipped to face Lana. "Don't call me Babs. You know no one is allowed to call me that."

Lana backed off a little. "I know. I'm sorry. Barbara… we have to get you out of this apartment, though. You haven't left for weeks… well, other than to visit the cemetery. That's just not healthy. You need to move on, Barbara. You got shot, you can't walk, you lost someone important… but you're still alive."

Barbara sat, quiet, and then turned her head back to her desk. "I think it's time for you to go now," she said quietly.

Lana nodded. "Yeah… that's what I figured you'd say," she commented as she rose and left the room.

As soon as she left, Barbara broke down and started crying.

Dick turned to the figure. "What happened to her? Who died? Did her dad die?"

The figure turned and walked out of the room, leading Dick once more into the Batcave. She pointed at the cases that held his own, Jason Todd and Tim Drake's Robin costumes, as well as Barbara's Batgirl costume. "There's a new addition… look for yourself," she told him.

As he walked over to the cases, he saw a fourth case. In the fifth case was a new costume. His Nightwing costume. He held his breath as he walked closely up to the glass and looked it over. There he saw, despite the careful stitching, the three bullet holes that scarred the breastplate. Shaking, he turned to the figure. "It was me, wasn't it? That's who Barbara lost, isn't it?"

The figure simply nodded.

"What happened?"

The figure stepped past him and looked at the costume as she told the story. "You were there. You went with Batman and Batgirl when they discovered where the Joker was holding Tim. As Tim held the gun out to shoot Batman, you jumped in the way. You saved Bruce's life… by sacrificing your own. However, neither Tim nor Bruce has been able to forgive themselves for that day, and Barbara has not forgiven them, either."

While the figure had been telling her story, Dick had walked over the where Bruce was sitting to look at the pictures. There was a crime scene photo of Dick's body, a school picture of Dick from ninth grade and a picture of Barbara, presumably before the Joker shot her, kneeling at Dick's grave. Dick stared at these photos as the figure came up behind him. "You do not like this outcome?"

He turned on her, and found himself standing back in the hospital room. "No! Of course not! I'm dead, and everyone I care about is miserable. I don't like that outcome at all."

She nodded. "Chose another. Change another path then, go back farther."

He thought. "What if I had never left Gotham? If I had never become Nightwing?"

"You think things would change?"

He nodded. "Yeah…. They'd have to."

"Very well." She said with a nod and he blinked.