Love or Hate? (Part 3)
By Firenze

A/N: As you might know, I gave up on this fic in December. But I liked this fic too much to give it up completely. Also thanks to ~*Liz*~, Artisan of the Written Word, and anyone else for encouraging me to finish it. I knew I'd come back to it someday. I tried finishing it a bunch of times, but this time I think I'll actually do it. The main reason I stopped writing this fic was... Well if you already know, good for you. If you care, ask. I'm not in the mood for more explanations than I already owe.

Anyway, I had a whole bunch of ideas for this 3rd part, but they either didn't fit, got shot down, or they just plain sucked or I couldn't write it. Anyway, I trashed all my former ideas and tried to come up with a new one. I don't know if it will make too much sense, but I'm just aiming to see if I can't wrap up everything by the 4th or 5th chapter. Hopefully this part will fit into why Sora hates Tai, be different from the things I've been writing lately, and just be somewhat good. High hopes? You bet. Do I think I can achieve that? Probably not. But I'll try.

Disclaimer: Digimon was never, will never, and can never be mine.

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*By the way, if you forgot what happened or never read this fic, go back to parts 1 and 2 and read those first*

"I never knew Taichi did that!" Hikari exclaimed, horrified. "I mean, he went through this awful period when he was so depressed he never ate, and he barely even talked to us. He just stayed alone in his room, occasionally muttering to himself, 'I'm so sorry, Sora, I'm so sorry,' and sometimes late at night, I could even hear him crying."

"Taichi crying?" Sora asked in amazement. "Of all the years I've known him, I've never seen him actually cry -- well except about Agumon, but I mean, I've never seen him sobbing and crying and all. It doesn't fit."

"Remember that time in the Digiworld, the first time," Mimi began, "when you got kidnapped by Datamon--"

"Of course I remember!" she burst out. "He only kept me captive and tried to clone me!"

"Yeah, that's how Taichi felt about it too," she said quietly. "And he knew it was all his fault because he could have saved you, but he was too afraid to go through the electric wall. Later at camp, he was crying; really, really crying, and he didn't care who saw him. He was crying because he couldn't save you, and he was very sorry about it. He desperately wanted to save you, so don't think Taichi just left you there."

"I never thought that," Sora said in a soft voice, drawing her knees to her chest and hugging them tightly. "But I didn't think he cared *that* much."

"You just never knew how much he loved you," Hikari told her.

"But-- but--" she sputtered hopelessly.

Miyako shook her head. "There are no 'buts' about it. Sora, I know Taichi really hurt your feelings with those remarks, but he didn't know your mother was dead. If he had, he never would have said those harsh things about her. He never would have even tried asking you out or anything; he would probably comfort you and try to make you feel better. You know that."

"I didn't at the time--"

"And then did you ever think how Taichi felt after that?" Mimi pressed. "He felt terrible enough once he found out that he had completely put down your mother when she had just died, and that would be enough to make anyone so depressed they wouldn't eat. And Taichi wasn't eating; can you believe that? That pig--" She started to giggle, and then cleared her throat and went on seriously. "The real reason he felt bad was because he knew how much he hurt you. Considering he was in love with you, that would hurt a lot to him. And then you had already broken his heart by refusing to date him without any reasonable explanation."

Sora's jaw dropped. "No, but I--"

"Just continue with the story," Hikari instructed, and Sora nodded, knowing that now she wouldn't be winning their sympathy about the whole situation.

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"Hey, Sora... This is Taichi...again. I just wanted to say, in case you erased the other messages, that I can't apologize enough. I am so, so, so, so, so, so, SO sorry. I never knew that your mom was -- decease -- erm, passed aw -- dea -- what she is. I really hope we can be friends again...or something. And I was lying, I do still love you. ...Errr...uhm, bye." BEEP!

Sora sighed, frustrated, and deleted the seventeenth message that Taichi had left. Then she turned around and headed for her bedroom.

When the phone rang again.

"Taichi, will you just give up, for crying out loud!" she cried out.

A deep, businessman sounding voice said, "Hello... I'm calling for a Ms. Takenouchi..."

Well, it in no way resembled Taichi's, but she noted it sounded suspiciously like Yamato with a poorly masked voice. After thinking it over for a while, she dashed to the phone anyway and picked it up. "Hello?"

"Sora! Thank god you finally answer--" It was now Taichi's voice.

CLICK.

*Give up already!* she thought. *What do I have to do to stop him from--* She got an idea and unplugged all the phones in her house. "Peace and quiet," she said, flumping onto the couch. And then she fell into a deep sleep.

* * *

Taichi sighed and placed the receiver down slowly. "There goes my fifteenth unsuccessful attempt. Do you think she hates me now, Yamato?"

The blonde boy placed his bass down. "I can't say, Taichi. You did a pretty horrible thing. But I'm sure she'll forgive you eventually. Come on, this is Sora we're talking about. She's forgiven you for tons of things. Right? You two can fight like cats and dogs sometimes, then you always end up all lovey dovey like birds and bees."

"We fought about stupid things," he argued. "Oh, I gave her some hairclips for her birthday and she thought I hated her hat and her hair. So I threw up in her lucky hat before. We've always argued about my immaturity and lack of thinking before acting. I've always called her too much of a worrywart. This is different, Yamato! I totally said every single bad thing there is to say about her mother, when she's dead!"

"Sora will forgive you," he assured him. "Come on, you've been a total jerk tons of times, and she forgave you--"

"Her mom is not a fucking lucky hat!" Taichi yelled impatiently. He slammed his fist down on something wrapped in tinfoil, placed on the counter. Which was harder than hitting the counter itself. He cursed loudly. "What was that?!" he asked, cradling his hurt hand in his other.

"Oh, I think it's one of the fruitcakes your mom sent over last Christmas..." Yamato said sheepishly. "Did you guys even eat that stuff? Takeru lost a tooth from trying to bite into it."

"Gee, thanks," he said sarcastically. "Go and insult my mom's cooking when I'm feeling bad."

He shrugged again. "His tooth was loose, and you know yourself that your mother is a horrible cook. But anyway, how do you think Sora feels? You didn't insult her mom's cooking. You insulted her dead mom. Very, very harshly. And she was already bummed about the death. Plus, you're her best friend in the whole world, right? So multiply your feelings times some odd thousand...you've got Sora's feelings."

"God, no wonder she hates me," he realized, falling onto the couch. "And I can't do anything about it. Not a single, fucking thing!"

"Hey, just relax. Maybe if you stop tensing about it, you'll come up with a solution. You're trying too hard, just loosen up," he advised him.

"How am I supposed to relax right now?" Taichi demanded.

"Maybe a song will cheer you up," he suggested.

Yamato started strumming a mellow little tune for a few measures. "This one is for you, Taichi Yagami." He played on longer, then after a while, he began to improvise lyrics. "I know a girl... The most beautiful, nice one in the world... And I love her... And she loves me." Then he started playing a few more chords. "I am a guy... The most insensitive asshole, I can't lie... And I acted like a jerk, our relationship won't work, and now she hates me..."

"Cut it out!" Taichi grabbed the bass from the musician's hands. It nearly fell on the floor, but Yamato caught it.

"What are you trying to do, you jerk?"

"ME?! You and your dumb song--!"

The front door opened. "Yamato, you there?" Mr. Ishida stepped into the apartment, with his usual tired swagger. He took off his jacket and was holding it with one hand behind his back. Then he tossed it on his chair at the dining table and slumped down. He picked up his Sonic CD player and was about to listen to the soothing sound of buffaloes migrating, when Yamato spoke up.

"You've had your heart broken, right, Dad?"

He placed the CD player down, pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his coat pocket, lit it, and then took a puff. "Yamato, do you really want to hear this whole story about your mother again?"

He shook his head vigorously. "No, of course not. That's the longest and most boring story possible. Taichi and I just kind of wanted your advice... You know, your thoughts on heartbreak."

He took another puff and thought for a while. "It sucks," he said finally. "And it doesn't go away for a long, long time."

"Yeah, I figured that," Taichi said glumly, crossing his arms.

"You had your heart broken, kid?" he asked Taichi.

"Yep," he muttered. "And if was all my stupid fault."

Mr. Ishida laughed. "It's always our faults. We're men, what do you expect? Everything is our fault. We're insensitive, lazy slobs."

"And total jerks," Taichi agreed.

(Dude, I'm not sexist or anything, okay?)

"That reminds me of a song," Yamato began, picking up his instrument. He began to play softly. "This is for you, Taichi Yagami...and you too, Dad. And it goes a little something like this--"

"Don't you dare." Taichi whacked the bass out of his hands, hard; and this time, it flew across the room, and then successfully landed and cracked on the ground.

Mr. Ishida choked on his cigarette. Oh boy, that kid had made a HUGE mistake.

Yamato's jaw dropped. His initial reaction was shock. Then his eyes narrowed. Raw anger...it was definitely building... "Taichi, you're a dead man!" He jumped up to his feet and placed his hands around Taichi's neck to strangle him. "I'm going to make your life miserable--"

Taichi didn't even try to run, he just hung his head and gave. In a depressed voice, he replied, "It already is."

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"Wait just one second!" Hikari cut in.

Mimi and Miyako groaned, and Sora sighed at the interruption. "You better have a good reason," Mimi whined. "I wanted to hear what Yamato did to Taichi!"

"I DO have a good reason. Sora, how do you know things from Yamato and Taichi's points of view if you never wanted to see Taichi again?"

"Good point!" the other two realized.

"Oh, that," she remembered. "Well, I never said I wouldn't talk to Yamato ever again..."

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An hour or so had passed, and Yamato and Taichi finally stopped fighting and rolling around on the ground strangling and trying to kill each other. They sat down, panting, and struggling to regain their breath.

"Hey, I'm really sorry about your bass," Taichi said breathlessly. "I never meant to break it."

Yamato glanced over his shoulder at his bass, which had a huge crack down it. His expression was obviously sad, but he just said, "It can be fixed. And though you think your situation can't, you've got to at least try. Don't just give up on Sora and your relationship. It hasn't been too long, and I think you two can still have a chance."

"How do I apologize for what I did?" he asked, resting his chin on his fists.

"I don't think you can yet."

Taichi's head swiveled to face the other boy's. "Then I am screwed! If I can't apologize, what can I do?"

"Hmmm..." Yamato thought about that for a while. "How about I go talk to her?" he suggested. "I'll see how Sora's feeling about the whole thing, try to calm her down, convince her that you're not a total ogre, and maybe she'll forgive you."

His eyes lit up. "Would you really?"

"Sure, I'm always willing to help a friend in need," he replied.

Taichi looked down at the ground. "Hey, while you were punching me in the face, I'm sorry I said you were a terrible friend too, and shouldn't have deserved the crest of friendship."

"It's okay. I shouldn't have called you a bad friend in the first place."

"But I am," he admitted. "If I were any decent friend, I wouldn't have said what I did to Sora."

"You didn't know about her mom. I know that's still no excuse, but don't do this to yourself; all this self-pity. If it were the other way around -- if I had done this to Sora, you'd tell me not to lose any sleep over it. Come on, you're only human. And all humans make mistakes. It doesn't make you a terrible person, all right?" Yamato told him. "You're not a bad friend either. I'll tell Sora all of this, and she's got to understand."

"What if she doesn't?"

He paused for a very long time, wondering what he could say that wouldn't further discourage Taichi. "We can't afford to think about that right now."

* * *

The doorbell rang one more time. Obviously, this person wasn't going to give up. But she had this feeling, this gut feeling, that it wasn't Taichi. Why not? Finally, she got up off the couch and walked to the front door. Peeking out the peephole, she realized her intuition had been right. Nope, Taichi wasn't at the door.

It was Yamato. He stood there waiting, his hands in his pockets, not budging an inch. Was he determined to talk to her as much as Taichi was? And then she realized it was probably about Taichi. Or he could've been there simply to comfort her. Once Sora had found out her mother had died, Yamato was the first person there to comfort her. And of that, she was grateful. So with slightly trembling fingers, she slid the latch off the door, unlocked it, and then slowly turned the knob.

Yamato let out a sigh of relief. "Thank you, Sora."

"For what?" she asked hesitantly.

"For giving me a chance."

"I -- I don't understand," she said, a puzzled expression on her face. "Why don't you come inside, and we'll talk about it."

He shook his head. "Let's go for a walk. You need to be outside and get some fresh air. It's always good for you after things like this happen."

She hesitated.

"Come on, let's go. Trust me, you can't stay cooped up in your house forever. It's just a little stroll," he told her. "Can't do any harm."

Finally she nodded, stepped outside, and locked her door. They began to walk down the corridor and to the elevator. They were silent until they finally exited the apartment building.

"So why did you come here?" she asked him curiously.

"I wanted to check up on you," he explained. "See if you're feeling all right yet."

"You already know what happened with Taichi and I, right?" she asked feebly, carefully avoiding his gaze. He nodded, and then reached for her hand. Sora looked at him, confused, but let him take it. "So if you know what he did...how do you think I'm supposed to feel all right?"

He shrugged. "I figured you wouldn't. I know what he did really, really hurt you...but I came here to tell you that you should give him a chance."

Her eyes narrowed. "Why should I? After what he did?"

"Because--" He gulped and tried to remember what he had told Taichi earlier. "Because he's only human, and all humans make mistakes."

"I'm sure most humans are smart enough not to make mistakes that completely dumb and insensitive. Of course, that's what Taichi is -- dumb and insensitive," she said coldly.

It was then that Yamato realized convincing Sora to forgive Taichi would be a whole lot harder than he expected. "If that was true, why would he be feeling so terrible about what he did to you? If he were really that insensitive, he wouldn't give a damn about how you feel. But he does care. Maybe more than he should. But how can you blame the guy? He's still in love with you, you know."

"Was I supposed to lie and agree to date him, when I had more important things -- like, say, my mother being dead -- to worry about? Should I just pretend to love him so he isn't hurt, and I'm hurt more?"

"You don't have to pretend to love him," he said, reading her mind. "I know that you've loved Taichi just as long -- maybe even longer -- than he's loved you. When you love someone that much, it doesn't just go away because of one incident."

"But it can," she disagreed, looking entirely downhearted. "Every time he did something stupid, every time we argued and fought, every time something between us wasn't perfect -- I wondered if I really should be in love with him, or if I was just being foolish and wishing for something that could never work."

"It can't ever be perfect," Yamato told her. "Nothing is perfect. Taichi sure isn't. And believe it or not -- no offense or anything -- but neither are you. I mean, I'm not, no one is. Perfection is just an empty word. But you and Taichi could be so close to it that it's amazing you're not together yet."

"I'm guessing you think this is my fault?" she asked suspiciously.

"No, not that at all!" He looked at her, and finally caught her watery cinnamon eyes. He took both of her hands and turned to face her, still staring deeply into her eyes. "It's not you fault. It's not Taichi's either. You can't just place the blame fully on one person. Anyone can take credit for it, but that's never entirely true. It takes two to argue."

"So you are saying some of it is my fault."

"Isn't it, though?" he asked. "Hell, we could just say all of this is my fault. It's just about as true as saying all of this weight belongs on Taichi's shoulders. Come on, Sora, what do you say? At least give him a chance... Hear him out and try to see things from his perspective?"

Sora was reluctant to say anything. Her eyes kept darting around, like there was someone nearby who could just give her all the right answers. After thinking it over for so incredibly long, she looked down at the ground. "Okay," she mumbled.

"Thank you!" Yamato exclaimed, loosening his grip on her wrists. Then he gave her a hug. "Thank you, Sora, for making the right choice."

"I know that my mother never gave Taichi a chance," she whispered, "so I'm only trying to be fair to him by being more open."

"That was a good decision," he told her, burying his face in her hair. Why did it feel so right to have Sora in his arms? Sure, he had done what he set out to do; get Sora to give Taichi a chance... So why did he feel himself getting drawn more and more to Sora instead?

"What would I do without you, Yamato?" she asked him, resting her head on his shoulder. He didn't reply, still too wrapped up in his thoughts. "Why didn't..." She looked up at him, finally making eye contact for the first time. Her voice dropped to a low whisper. "Why didn't I fall in love with you in the first place?"

Yamato froze. "What?"

"You're so much better for me," she said. "You've always been there for me when I needed help--"

"That was Taichi," he protested. "You even said he was knight in shining armor--!"

"No," she said, placing her finger to his lips. "It's you."

"You're getting it all wrong, Sora," he said frantically. "This trauma has gotten you all confused..."

"But I've never seen it all so clearly," she said, her eyes misty. "Don't you see? This whole time I was living a lie, thinking I loved Taichi. It was because my mother told me not to ever love anyone or anything. So I naturally fell for the boy closest to me, Taichi... But I never really loved him..." She stood on her tiptoes, bringing her face closer to his. "I love you..."

And without knowing what he was doing, Yamato felt like a magnet was drawing him closer to her too. What he was doing was wrong, he was supposed to be helping Taichi, not himself. Why wasn't that enough for him? *This is wrong, this is wrong* he kept telling himself. Then he finally gave into it. *But it feels so right...* He closed his eyes and then closed the gap between his and Sora's lips.

When they drew apart, Sora had a wide smile on her face. But Yamato's jaw dropped. When he opened his eyes, the first thing he saw was -- Taichi.

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I'm sure you all expected that. I was trying to keep you guys guessing with what would happen in this story, but it just became to obvious I would do this. It doesn't end Sorato, I promise, this is all part of the plot. It does fit in with the Sora hating Tai thing...just wait until the next part! (Assuming I finish it...) For now, I'll need your encouragement or else I might just give up again...