Dreams...

Like water slipping through the fingers, little fragments of
remembrance slipping like sand through the hourglass, unstoppable
inexorable

Landscape of the mind, like an artist on acid colors and
visions, truths and illusions all mingling into one everything to one

flaps its wings

fluttering the sound filling mind brain soul heart all one the
same inside not out

and somewhere else, minutiae of causation

man who dreamt he was a butterfly woke and didnt know if he was
man who dreamt he was butterfly or butterfly dreaming he was man

what was real

what is real

What is real? Reality, not seeming, truth amidst illusion
cause and effect

am I real?

what is 'I'?

around, twisted landscape, clouds of fire frozen in time,
stretching across dark sky. landscape of mind

not my mind

not my

real?

man. Tall, with black hair tied back in long ponytail,
trailing to mid-back he: I am Ranma Saotome. Look for truth in
dreams and reality in illusion. What was real is not and seeming
finds gaps in the mind, hooks to entangle traps of consciousness
What once you knew is strange, forgotten and gone, newness finds a
foothold life is gone dark

I: dark; there is fear in the dark darkness in dreams draws out
fear makes it our own

he: no not your own, from outside, communication without speech
do not fear the dark for within lies

flee from Eden...

rushing away movement without form falling up and out beyond
into lengths and distances unknowable far beyond boundaries of self
and other dream fleeing consciousness stretches wakes

shinjiakanenabiki wake leaving behind dream from out lungs
flaring life after do not fear the dark for within

Rei opened her eyes suddenly, sleep fleeing, gone in a flash of
returning consciousness. She sat up slowly, the sheer white sheet
falling from about her thin shoulders.

Crimson eyes turned inward, she listened to what a real
illusion had told her.

***

A Neon Genesis/Ranma 1/2 Elseworlds Saga
By Dan Riley...

Landscape of the Soul

Chapter 2
Truth in Dreams
Part 1
Moving Apart, Moving Together

***

Even on a black and empty street... if we go together... we might one
day find something... like the moon that floats in the darkness.
-Yoshiyuki Sadamoto, NGE manga vol. 3

***

Shinji sat in the spacious shower, feeling the cold water
washing over him, prickling his skin in waves. He shivered ever so
slightly, and watched the rivulets of water with even more intensity
than usual.

He didn't even hear the curtain whisk open a little.

"Shinji."

He was startled by her voice breaking in on him. He looked up
to see her standing at the entrance to the shower, pale skin, blue
hair, crimson eyes. Whatever other slight changes had taken place
with her, she still paid no attention to his nudity.

"What is it, Rei?"

"Suzuhara is awake. I thought you might want to see him."

Immediately, Shinji stood up. "Water off." He shook himself a
little, watching the water droplets spin away, then walked over to
the exit of the shower. Rei stepped aside to let him by. "Of course
I want to see him," he said, picking up his towel and starting to dry
off. "Do you know how he is?"

She shook her head, her mane of hair seeming alive with the
movement. "No. I came to get you before I saw him."

He quickly shoved his pants on and tied his shoes, grabbing his
shirt on his way out. "Asuka's been a wreck. I can't believe they
had to amputate his arm and leg."

Shinji and Rei both knew that Ritsuko had been fully aware that
he had required such surgery from the start, and had kept it from
them.

He slipped on his shirt before opening the door, his hair
uncombed and still damp, and set a brisk pace toward the medical
wing. Rei followed at his side.

The dim rumble of thunder could be heard, even within the
bowels of NERV-HQ. Ahead, the door to the medical wing, proclaiming
so with a plaque to the side. Shinji opened it and stepped through,
Rei behind.

Maya Ibuki looked up from her desk when they entered and
smiled. "Hello Shinji, Rei. Toji and Asuka are in the second room
on the left." She pointed with a pen in the general direction she
meant before going back to her paperwork.

Shinji hesitated a moment with his hand on the doorknob, before
turning it and stepping inside. Asuka was sitting on a chair next to
the bed Toji lay in, and both turned their heads as Shinji and Rei
entered the room.

Toji smiled, but his mouth had a cynical twist to it. "Hey
there. Glad you could make it." He waved his hand - his cybernetic
hand. The dull gray and black metal glinted softly in the light of
the room. Shinji's eyes widened at the sight, And Asuka gasped
softly, but Rei seemed unperturbed.

"So, um... how are you feeling?" Shinji took a step into the
room, feeling somewhat like an unwanted visitor.

"Oh, beautiful. Mr. Societal Outcast has some pity to dole out
for me. Save it for someone who cares."

Shinji frowned and opened his mouth, but was interrupted by
Rei.

"It is good that you are recovering. Hellgate activity has
been increasing steadily for the last twelve hours."

Toji looked at her and burst out laughing. "I'm glad to hear
that. Who would've thought that the Ice Girl would have something
sentimental to say? Anyway, I'm really going to need to smash a few
skulls once I'm well enough."

"Toji," Asuka said softly, "They just wanted to know how you
were feeling."

"Shut the hell up. Shut the hell up! You don't know how I
feel, and you don't give a shit! You feel obligated by your
conscience to pay me a visit and hand out a little sympathy out of
the kindness of your hearts... well, that's shit I don't need. Only
Ice Girl doesn't pretend - she might be the best of us all, at that,
the only honest one."

"Toji!" Asuka was angry now, but her features were twisted
with mixed feelings... love, pity, regret, anger, they all danced
across her face.

"Get out."

"Hey, Toji, calm down." Shinji tried to placate him. "We
really did just want to see how you were doing. Sorry if we bugged
you."

"Get the fuck out of here!"

Rei quietly slipped out the door.

"Toji, please, don't make me leave..." Asuka whispered, trying
to take his hand. Roughly, he knocked her hand away.

"GET OUT! GET OUT OF HERE! GET OUT!!"

Shinji held the door open for Asuka, who looked back at Toji
before walking out. He had his back turned to them, staring out the
window at the dark, rain-washed scenery outside. Shinji left,
shutting the door quietly behind him.

Rei was waiting for him.

"Where's Asuka?"

Rei looked at the door, then back at Shinji. "She left, toward
her apartments."

Shinji turned to look at the door for a long moment, then
sighed. As he turned to leave, Rei whispered softly, almost on the
edge of hearing.

"I... am sorry I could not help."

Shinji turned. "With Toji?"

"Yes."

"I'm not sure we can help, unless he wants us to."

He walked away, leaving Rei looking at the floor.

"Ice Girl..."

***

Asuka shut the door quietly behind her, walking over to the
table and sitting down, elbows leant on the smooth surface, face in
hands.

I won't cry.

What the hell is he thinking I we only wanted to help how could
he

I won't.

She stood up, the legs of the chair scraping across the floor,
jarring the quiet. She turned to the refrigerator, opening it, and
looked at the items held inside.

Shinji even Rei they came to see how he was doing and he

how could he

I won't.

He's hurting needs to lash out needs to hurt I need to help him
be there for him but still how could he how dare he

I will not

Growling softly, she slammed the refrigerator door shut.
Standing, she walked into the den, collapsing onto the couch and
desperately clicking on the television. A strange melody stirred
from the speakers, as the opening to a show came to a close.

//I am hurting...//
//I have lost it all...//
//I am losing...//

//Nowhere to breathe...//

The image of a small girl, walking across a bridge in the city.
A gust of wind blows her hat from her head, as a crow flies past.
Suddenly, time seems to stop; the hat floats still in midair, as the
girl looks up at the crow, the shadow of its wing obscuring part of
her face. Then, the girl turns and walks on, leaving her hat and the
crow floating still, trapped in midair.

Asuka listened to the soft music, as sobs shook her shoulders.

no battle ever won; never even fought the field only reveals to
man his own folly and despair, and victory is an illusion of
philosophers and fools

damn

***

Akane yawned, glancing over at her sister across the street.
She was doing the same thing. *I wonder if she had dreams too...*

"Akane!" She saw Nabiki waving to her, and crossed the still-
wet street over to meet her. It had only stopped raining a few
minutes before.

"You see him?"

Nabiki nodded. "He's in the crowd over there, heading this
way."

Akane looked up, shading her eyes - unnecessary, in the dusk-
like light of Tokyo-3 - trying to discern the man her sister was
talking about. She had never met Kaji before.

"Hey, Nabiki!" A young man, a few years older than her sister,
broke out of the crowd, walking across the street towards them. His
hair was tied back in a short pony-tail, and he was somewhat
unshaven. He wore a shirt and tie, but the collar was loosened, and
he carried his jacket over his shoulder.

"Kaji! Good to see you!" Nabiki waved back.

Kaji stepped up onto the curb beside them, a self-assured smile
twisting his lips. "Hey there. And this must be Akane. So, how're
things here in the city?"

Akane looked up at the strange man, and couldn't help but smile
slightly. "About as good as ever."

"That bad, huh? C'mon," he put his arms around the two
ladies' shoulders. "Let's go get lunch somewhere - I'm starved!
Time enough to talk business later."

Akane and Nabiki let themselves get pulled along.

***

Gendo Ikari sat in his dark office, his white-gloved hands
folded in front of his mouth. The light reflected off the lenses of
his glasses, making them opaque.

"You say you were attacked... by a human?"

Sohjiro glared at him from his seat in front of the desk, his
violet eyes flashing dangerously. "Not a human. A psychic."

"A mortal, still. And he... defeated you?"

A mixture of rage and shame swept across the demon's face.
"Yes. But, he was unlike any other psychic I have ever met."

Gendo's brows arched. "Really? How so?"

"He knew what I was. He could detect me, even in the middle of
the night, and hid his own presence from me until the last moment.
He... was not a normal psychic."

"You said that already. And you say that after disarming you
and drawing first blood, he gave you a message and left?"

Sohjiro nodded, remembrance bringing fresh shame to his face.
"Yes."

"And what was his message?"

"The broken mirror's shards fall through night, glimmering.
Angels walk the causeways of humanity, and demons claim dark their
own. As the Guardians draw near, the time of the Ascension does as
well. Tell the NERV Commander that a mirror's shard can slit a
throat, and that angels on leashes are not always easy to control.
Then he left."

"Hmmm..." Gendo Ikari leaned back in his chair, hands still
folded, one finger tapping thoughtfully. "Interesting."

Fuyutsuki's voice broke in from the dark behind the desk.
"Does this mean the Ban'nin will begin arriving soon?"

"Who can say? The psychics of the Mirror Shard clan have
always been cryptic, especially their prophecies. However, we have
known for some time now that we do not have long." His voice was
softly musing.

Sohjiro listened to the two humans discussing, intending to
remember every word.

As if suddenly remembering that the dark-haired man was still
there, Gendo sat forward and waved at him. "You are dismissed,
Sohjiro. And next time, you will report on time, or not at all."

Snarling, Sohjiro stood up and left the room. His fury left
the air noticeably cooler.

"Are you sure it is wise to provoke him?" Fuyutsuki asked from
the shadows.

"You know as well as I do what they say about him."

"Yes, but the Scrolls do not predict such small things as the
individual survival of you or I. He could kill us, if he wanted to.
And then everything would be lost, all our work."

"Perhaps. Perhaps." Gendo Ikari stood up. "Come, good
doctor. We have work to do."

The gray-haired older man stepped out of the shadows. "Yes. A
fifth pilot, the last of the ANGELs. I wonder, will his leash hold
him?"

"It will." Gendo walked to the door of the room, turning to
wait for Fuyutsuki to join him. "A leash of one's own making is
perhaps the only trap no one can escape from."

***

Akane ate another mouthful of her food, glancing up at Kaji and
her sister, who were talking animatedly. She couldn't help but feel
a small twinge of jealousy, that another person was as close to her
sister as she herself.

"So, Akane," Kaji's voice broke into her musings. "What do you
think?"

She blinked. "Hmm?"

Nabiki chuckled. "Never mind, Akane." She sobered, turning to
Kaji. "Anyway, don't you think we should get to discussing
business?"

Kaji sighed, sitting back in his chair. "I suppose so."

"You've come with a delivery for NERV, right?" Akane asked
deliberately.

"Yup, I guess I have. Top-secret stuff, very classified." He
grinned at them. "Wanna see it?"

Nabiki chuckled. "Sure, sounds like fun."

"What is it?" Akane asked, wondering.

"Adam," Kaji said softly, and stood up.

Akane and Nabiki followed Kaji in silence through the city to
his apartment.

Inside, Kaji moved through the dim corridors, the two sisters
following less confidently, until Kaji came to a door. Turning the
knob, He stepped through into his bedroom, holding the door open for
them to follow.

On his bed was a small metal suitcase.

Turning to the two girls as he opened it, Kaji watched their
faces as they saw what lay inside.

"This is it. The progenitor of the human species."

***

Doctor Ritsuko Akagi looked down at the tank of LCL fluid from
her spot in the laboratory, and wrinkled her nose at the smell. She
glanced at Commander Ikari, seated in the elevated seat at the rear
of the room, as her hand hovered above the middle vial of bluish
liquid.

*His choice now could determine the fate of everything...*

Gendo Ikari nodded almost imperceptibly, his white-gloved hands
folded in front of his mouth.

Ritsuko sighed slightly as she picked up the vial. *His choice
was made long before this moment. I only hope this course of events
I set in motion leads to the end we desire...*

She stuck the tip of a needle through the sealing membrane of
the vial, drawing the liquid up into the syringe. Testing it,
Ritsuko squirted out a bit of the liquid, then turned to the young
man leaning against the far wall.

Kaji stepped forward, holding up a small glass jar, within
which floated what appeared to be a human fetus amid a softly glowing
green liquid.

He held up the jar, and Ritsuko took it and examined it. After
a close inspection, she inserted the syringe and injected the blue
liquid. Then she turned and dumped them into the vat of LCL.

She turned to the Commander.

"It's done."

*Heaven help me, it's done.*

Gendo Ikari nodded. "Doctor Fuyutsuki and I have a meeting
with SEELE. Doctor Akagi, if you could oversee the rest of this
matter?"

"Of course."

"Good."

***

Misato Katsuragi was drunk.

"Shit!" Misato tried to correct the end table which had
lurched to bump into her, but it jumped out of her grasp and toppled
onto the floor. Shrugging and deciding that if the table didn't want
to be helped there was nothing she could do for it, Misato stumbled
deeper into her apartment and flopped down onto the couch.

"Wonder what's on th' TB...?" She grabbed the remote and
flipped the television on, sliding around until she sat with her head
hanging off the front and her legs propped up on the back. A
nondescript newscaster addressed her from the ceiling.

Her mind shied away from the reason why she was drunk.

Flipping through the channels, Misato giggled at upside down
skiers, robots, and, strangest of all, basketball players.

*Wonder how they get th' ball to fall up...?*

She wasn't drunk because Kaji was back in Tokyo-3, working in
NERV.

Settling on the basketball, Misato watched them defy gravity
with mild interest.

It wasn't because Kaji was her old college boyfriend, who she
had never quite gotten over. And it certainly wasn't because he had
arrived at NERV-HQ with a pretty young woman.

No, definitely not.

***

Gendo and Fuyutsuki stood before the assembled council of
SEELE, the Throne of Souls. Gendo, at least, seemed unperturbed.

"You called us here. We are at a very busy point right now, so
if you could come to the point quickly, I would be obliged." Gendo
observed the head of SEELE through his dark glasses as he spoke.

Fuyutsuki cleared his throat, obviously uncomfortable.

The head of SEELE frowned, sinister behind the strange visor
which obscured his eyes. "Yes. The point we have summoned you here
to make is a quick one." He turned to indicate the large viewscreen
behind the table which seated the members of SEELE. It flickered to
life, showing a scene of cold blackness, relieved only by a small
speck of color, apparently far distant.

"NERV is falling behind the schedule predicted in the Dead Sea
Scrolls for the Instrumentality Project. In order to... motivate
you... we have accelerated the course of events."

On the viewscreen, the dot of color flashed, then began to
move. Slowly at first, barely noticeable against the background of
blackness, but building speed until it approached at a headlong rush
the white-swirled blue globe in the distance.

Doctor Fuyutsuki gasped softly. "No... You didn't... wake it
up purposefully?"

"We did. It will make contact within the hour. Perhaps now
you will see that NERV is fully subordinate to this council." He sat
back down, smiling somewhat smugly.

Gendo Ikari merely nodded and left the room, Fuyutsuki trailing
behind.

"So, the psychic knew what he was talking about."

Fuyutsuki didn't know how Ikari could be so calm, when he
himself felt like pulling his hair out and gibbering. "These events
that they have set in motion will not stop until they have run their
full course." He was glad to hear that his voice didn't waver.

Gendo nodded. "We have known this was coming for a long time.
Now we must prepare to harness the lightning bolt, and bend it to our
will."

***

Asuka knocked at the door to Toji's room in the Medical Wing.
She hated it, but the knock sounded timid.

"Come in," she heard him answer faintly.

Opening the door, Asuka stepped around it into the room.

Toji lay on his bed with his back to her, once again staring
out the window at the gray, fog-covered skyline.

"Hey Toji," she said softly, kneeling down next to his bed. He
still didn't turn.

Asuka gazed at him sadly for a long moment. Finally, Toji
turned over slowly to look at her. His face was drawn. "Hey,
Pretty." His voice was hoarse.

"Hey. How are you feeling?"

"How am I feeling? Huh. Like half of me is missing."

Asuka looked down. "I..." she trailed off, not sure what to
say.

"Hey, Asuka..." He paused, turning to look out the window.

"What?"

"I'm sorry. About earlier, with Shinji and Rei. Will you...
tell them for me?"

Asuka smiled. "Of course I will."

"I love you, you know." He sounded a little afraid.

Asuka was a little surprised. He had never managed to say it
before. Her smile spread, brightening her face. "I know. I love
you too."

Toji seemed to relax a little, and before much longer he was
asleep. Asuka stayed at his side for a while, before heading home.

Walking through the hallways of NERV-HQ, Asuka thought about
what Toji had said to her. The thought made her smile, and she found
herself happier than she had been since Toji had gotten hurt.

Suddenly, the metallic clamor of the warning sirens broke the
stillness, causing Asuka to gasp and look up. The bright white
lighting switched to flashing red, signaling a state of emergency.

Fuyutsuki's voice rang out over the loudspeaker. //"Would
Captain Katsuragi, Shinji Ikari, Rei Ayanami, and Asuka Sohryu
Langley please report to the command center for an emergency
briefing."//

*What's going on...?*

Asuka took off at a run, her long red hair trailing behind her.

***

Misato tossed down another cup of black coffee. Very black
coffee. As she tasted the molasses-like liquid running down her
throat, she grimaced and shook her head. Ritsuko glanced at her.

"Are you alright, Misato?"

"Fine. I'm fine," she muttered, filling up another cup.

*Or at least I will be, as soon as the command center stops
spinning...*

Shinji came into the room, panting as though he had run to get
there. A moment later, Rei stepped in calmly. Asuka was the last
in, tearing into the room as though finishing a marathon.

"What's up?" the fiery girl asked of the command center at
large.

Doctor Akagi answered her.

"Take a look at this," she said, switching on the large
viewscreen.

The hexagonal display grid showed the image of... something,
moving across the countryside outside Tokyo-3. It was huge, which
could easily be told by the fly-sized jets that swarmed around it.

It was definitely not something normal - it looked made up of a
gray chitinous armor, and walked on ethereally-thin legs, strangely
elastic. It didn't have a head, but a strange face, made up of two
mask-like portions, vaguely bird-like, on the bulk of its body. It's
arms seemed jointed in all the wrong places, and terminated in three
opposing fingers.

Shinji gasped. "What is that?"

"Is it from one of the Hellgates?" Rei asked calmly.

"No," Ritsuko answered. "It is not a demon, but something...
else. We have reason to believe that it is the first of many of its
kind. The Magi has code named them Ban'nin. This is the Third one,
Sachiel."

"The third?" Asuka asked incredulously. "What about the first
two? I've never heard of anything like this before!"

Gendo Ikari spoke from his seat on the raised platform of the
command center. "The names we choose for them are of no concern to
you. Your only concern should be defeating them."

Asuka turned to glare at the Commander, but his icy gaze calmed
her fury.

Rei stepped forward. "What is the battle plan?"

"Well..." Ritsuko began, glancing at Misato.

"Give me a minute," the Captain growled, gulping down another
coffee.

"Oh boy," Shinji said softly.

***

"I'm detecting a slight fluctuation in my synchronization wave
pattern," Shinji said worriedly, glancing at the diagnostic display
on the helmet of his EVA.

"Is it within acceptable parameters?" Misato asked.

"By .01%."

Misato glanced at Ritsuko, who nodded. "Ignore it."

Shinji frowned slightly, but nodded. "Alright."

"How about everyone else?"

"My EVA is fully functional," Rei said softly.

"Everything's all set," Asuka chimed in.

"Good luck, Pretty," Toji said through his com link from his
bed in the Medical Wing.

"Thank you Toji. See you after we smash this thing!" Asuka
said animatedly.

"Open bay doors! ANGELs, launch!" At Misato's command, the
doors of the EVA bays swung open, and the mission was begun.

Shinji and Rei powered up their telekinetic flight systems, and
EVA Units 00 and 01 shot out of the launch bay. Asuka's Unit 02
joined them a moment later, her red EVA trailing a wave of heat-
mirage.

"The Third Ban'nin's location should be highlighted on your
maps. Conventional weaponry seems ineffectual against it; apparently
it has a very powerful aura which absorbs most of the impact from
missiles and such." Misato's voice was calm and business-like. This
was herself the Captain, the woman who had scored the highest
tactical score in the last fifty years straight out of college.
"Your synchro weapons should be able to handle the aura, though. Try
not to actually touch it any more than you have to - it will
eventually degrade your armor, and could have unforeseen psychic
side-effects."

Shinji brought up the map. It looked like Sachiel was making
its way steadily through the countryside, directly toward Tokyo-3.

"ANGELs, scramble and engage."

Gritting his teeth, Shinji rocketed his EVA toward the strange
giant menace that was the Third Ban'nin.

***

TRANSCRIPT OF MISSION 205A
ANGEL FIRST DIVISION & PILOT OF UNIT 02
(PILOT OF UNIT 03 EXCUSED DUE TO INJURY)

Shinji: "That thing is very big."

Toji: "Thanks for pointing that out, Shinji. I wouldn'ta guessed.
Just concentrate on whooping it, whatever it is."

Asuka: "Oh, that jet that the thing just hit... it looks like it's
going to crash into a building! Shouldn't we stop it?"

Misato: "Yes, of-"

Gendo: [Cutting in.] "No. Seconds could be critical. Converge on
the Ban'nin."

[An explosion.]

Toji: "That was... Shiboshi General Hospital, wasn't it?"

Gendo: "It is none of your concern. Continue with the assault."

Asuka: [Growling.] "Fine! I'll move forward and engage first.
Activating synchro blade."

Rei: "It appears to have noticed us."

[There is a sizzle of energy, and Asuka yells angrily.]

Asuka: "That was close! Alright, whatever you are, here I come!"

[Sound of battle. Asuka grunts with exertion.]

Rei: "Activate synchro claws. Moving to engage."

Misato: "Shinji, what are you waiting for?"

Shinji: ...

Misato: "Shinji? Please respond!"

Shinji: ...

Toji: "Hey, Shinji! What's going on?"

Misato: "Commander!"

Gendo: "Continue the mission."

[Radio silence for a few moments.]

Rei: "I believe I have wounded it."

Maya: "Detecting an immense surge of energy from Sachiel!"

[A sizzling explosion of energy. The sound of static slowly clears.]

Asuka: "Scheiss! It's got Shinji!"

Shinji: "AaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!"

Misato: "Shinji!"

END TRANSCRIPT

***

End Part 1: Moving Apart, Moving Together




Part 2: Angel Fire

***

dark

darkness all around, warm and impersonal

where am I?

darkness, nothingness like the space between the stars nothing
everywhere nothing anywhere

or everything nowhere?

who am I?

shards of memory. a small young boy with dark hair. is this
me?

no. this is not who I am

I am what is inside

what is inside?

Rei Ayanami.

who... is Rei?

girl. pale skin soft voice crimson eyes brown hair

no... not brown... why can't I remember?

but that is outside. who is Rei?

silence. crimson gaze. friends...

brown hair...

Yui. Yui Ikari

mother.

Rei... Yui...

images merge blue becomes brown eyes deep crimson depths
Father. no I have no part of him, emerging as though created solely
by mother father nonexistent silent and dark father and rei

"My god! How can he move like that?!"

I'll study hard by myself

you there hold it is that your bike

no but someone had thrown it away under the bridge so I

it's not nice to lie

father... you wouldnt concede to my existence even then.

I exist Father! I am!

I am

alive...

"We're not detecting any life signs from the pilot... could it
be...? The EVA is out of control?!"

Shinji...

grasping desperately... this that is me I am Shinji

Shinji...

this from outside... something other than myself; who is there?

Shinji...

who is there? who is this? Rei...?

Shinji. I will protect you.

Rei smiling softly *rei smiling?* brown hair she turns and
walks away into the darkness

I will protect you.

"Unit 01 is attacking the Third Ban'nin as though without
concern for its own safety! The Ban'nin appears severely damaged...
Sachiel... is dead..."

no. Not Rei.

"Commander?"

father smiles silently mouth hidden by white gloved hands eyes
hidden by opaque lenses

"Mother..."

"We have life signs from the pilot!"

***

Captain Katsuragi is speaking.

Unnecessary really; we both know that this has nothing to do
with us. Ban'nin... I feel an... echo... when I hear that name.
What are the Guardians?

Leaving the room. Mission is accomplished, though no one knows
how. Ikar... no, Shinji.

Is he alright? I hope he is.

Dr. Akagi: You can visit him if you want.

Visit him? I... think I will.

Will he yell? Get the fuck out of here! I don't know what I
will do if he yells.

He is there, in the bed, like Toji before. What happened to
him? Mother...

Mother...

He stirs. I suppose I shouldn't have touched him. I don't
know why I did.

His eyes blink open slowly. They are bright and clear, but
confused. I like his eyes.

He lifts his hand, as though trying to touch something, looking
at me but not seeing.

"Mother..."

The word... touches an echo, inside me. Mother... Who is
mother? What is mother?

"Mother..."

It frightens me. I don't know why. Something inside, hidden,
trying to come up and see the light. But then I would not be myself.
I am confused. Why did I take a step back?

"Mother..."

I am against the door. I don't know... my heart is beating
fast. Why? That word. Stop saying that word.

The door opens behind me. I stumble out. Mother... It echoes
in my head. Stop it. Stop it!

Langley standing there, surprised. I don't care. Stop saying
that word! Stop it!

I run. Why am I so frightened? Why would I not be me?

I am alone again.

***

Rei? What word...?

Turning back to look at Shinji, laying on the bed. He stirs
restlessly, muttering broken words. What was she talking about?

I kneel down and brush the hair from his forehead. He's got a
fever. The doctors already know, of course. God, I hope he'll be
alright. He's kind of a loser, and the least effectual of the
pilots...

EVA Unit 01 a blaze of speed and energy, striking the Ban'nin
repeatedly not only with fists and feet, but with blasts of pure
energy; it falls beneath the rain of blows. Never seen anything move
so fast...

But he's an okay guy, and if we lost him while Toji's down...
it would... devastate the ANGEL program. Who am I kidding? Please
be alright, Shinji.

Toji... I don't know. He seems to be handling it alright, but
I'm sure he's hiding something... He has to share with me... Dammit.

Shivering. The way he yelled when that thing grabbed him.
God, I thought... I dunno, his soul was being ripped out or
something. Who knows what that thing could have done to him... what
it did do to him...

Never seen anything move so fast...

Well, you inconsiderate jerk, you better hurry up and get
better! I'm going to kick your ass as soon as you can walk! How
could you endanger the mission like that? Spacing out at the last
moment. Jeez, I thought ANGELs were made of sterner stuff.
Stupid... please be alright.

Ritsuko: It's getting late. Why don't you go home? I know
you've been losing sleep over Toji. Please don't let this endanger
your health, Miss Langley.

Alright. Goodnight then, Ritsuko. Don't go to easy on him; I
can't believe he was such a wuss back there.

Ritsuko: Of course, Asuka. We'll give him the hardest bed in
the Med. Wing.

Yes. Well. I'll be going then. What was she smiling about?
He deserves it for chickening out.

I hope Toji and Shinji are okay...

***

Gendo Ikari watched the replay of the battle against Sachiel,
no sign of emotion present on his face. Fuyutsuki gasped at the
near-invisible speed that Unit 01 had for a moment shown, and the
blasts of psychic energy it had wielded seemingly effortlessly.
Ritsuko was busy scribbling notes on the capabilities of a berserk
EVA.

*He knew this was going to happen.*

Misato looked away from the Commander and shook her head, but
she couldn't shake off the thought. *I know. He risked his son's
life again.*

Maybe it was just the lingering alcoholic haze... she would
wake up tomorrow morning and... *No. I'm sure.*

She watched EVA Unit 01 rear back, floating in the air,
surrounded by an intense psychic aura - so intense that it was easily
visible to the naked eye, like a crackling electrical nimbus. Then
the EVA pointed, and an immense blast of energy slammed the Ban'nin
into the ground.

I still can't believe... How could an EVA go berserk? It's
just a machine... isn't it? And Shinji, unconscious inside...

The replay ended, and Ritsuko turned to the Commander.

"The pilot was found in a state of catatonia, which we can
assume started after being assaulted by the Ban'nin. We still do not
know what caused his mental collapse - some ability of the Ban'nin, a
problem with the EVA - or even why he paused during the assault. As
of now, his brain waves are slowly returning to normal, and his only
physical symptom is a high fever.

"If this was some sort of psychic attack by Sachiel, there may
be lasting effects on the pilot's psyche. We cannot tell until he
wakes up."

Gendo nodded slowly. "When do you estimate he will regain
consciousness?"

*How can he be so cold about his own son?* Misato drew her
jacket tighter around herself.

"Within two hours, sir."

"Keep him sedated. I don't want him awake before tomorrow
morning."

Ritsuko seemed surprised, but nodded. "Yes sir. I'll go and
give Maya the instructions now."

Gendo nodded, and Ritsuko stood up and left the room. The
Commander turned his inscrutable gaze on Misato.

"Do you have anything to say, Captain Katsuragi?"

Misato glared at him. *Yeah. Why are you such a son of a
bitch? Is my pilot going to wake up insane because of you? What's
your deal?* Of course, she said none of it. "No, sir."

"Good. You are dismissed."

Misato turned and stalked from the room.

The last thing she heard before the door slid shut was
Fuyutsuki speaking.

"You are a cold man, Ikari."

***

Rei sat in the corner of her small bedroom, curled up, head
tucked between her knees.

mother

Stop...

mother

stop it

mother mother mother mother MOTHER

STOP IT!

mothermothermothermothermother

Rei Ayanami shook slightly, and a single tear slid from the
corner of her crimson eye.

***

//"One of the pilots had some sort of mental breakdown."//
Nabiki listened to Kaji's voice. The slight crackle of static told
her that he was calling from a cell phone.

"What happened?"

//"He seemed to chicken out when attacking the big monster -
they're calling it a Ban'nin - although in retrospect it was probably
something else. Then the thing grabbed him. He screamed," Kaji
seemed to recall the scream somewhat fearfully, "and the shit hit the
fan. The EVA went psycho and beat the Ban'nin into the ground. And
it didn't just use its fists. It blasted the thing with all kinds of
crazy psychic energy - it was like watching an anime. And get this;
the pilot, poor kid, was unconscious the whole time."//

"He was unconscious?" Nabiki asked. Her sister looked up at
her incredulous words. "But aren't the EVAs just powered armor?"

//"That's what I thought too, but it looks like they're
something more. That's something I'm going to have to look into."//

"Well, just be careful. Knowing you you'll get caught going
through top-secret files because you whistled at a passing
secretary."

//"Ah! You wound me!"// Nabiki could tell he was clutching
his heart, stricken. //"Of course I'll be careful. And you too,
with that crazy raid you're planning."//

"Hey, we're supposed to be a resistance movement. We can't
just sit back and do nothing."

He sighed. //"A resistance movement of two. Just don't go
getting delusions of grandeur on me. Anyway, I'd better go. Got
reports to make 'n stuff."//

"Good night."

//"G'night, girl. And seriously, be careful tomorrow."//

"I will."

She listened to the dial-tone for a moment before hanging up.

"We still on for tomorrow?" Akane was cleaning her synchro
blade again. It sometimes made Nabiki nervous, how often her sister
did that.

She sighed. "Yeah. We'd better get some sleep."

***

mother...

waking up, like coming into the light for the first time light
blinding too bright blinking newborn

the room spins revolving slowly before finally settling into
position. hospital room too bright and sterile it smells of
sickness

"Shinji Ikari."

someone... there... squinting trying to see through light
streaming down like liquid. tall man with black hair tied back in
tail falling to mid back. Who are you?

"I am Ranma Saotome. You have broken the threshold, Shinji."

What... what do you mean? What threshold?

"Not important right now. You must know that your leash
needn't always hold you."

Leash?

"You'll understand eventually. The Ayanami girl... I know she
is important to you. You must know her, and teach her to know you."

I... I don't...

"No, not yet. But you will. I have to go now."

gone... but there is someone else...

is that you, mother?

"Shh. Here you go, Mr. Ikari. That should keep you asleep
till morning. I'm surprised you managed to wake up already.
Shouldn't matter, though."

mother, where are you going? don't leave me...

***

NEWS REPORT, 20:31 WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 21, 2018
NERV PUBLIC RELATIONS

//We have just received a report on the incident that occurred in the
countryside outside Tokyo-3 earlier today. It seems that the ANGEL
pilots were engaged in a standard training exercise, which was
somehow sabotaged; probably by a psychic, who could have disrupted
the psychometry of one of the EVAs in a way that would be
undetectable by mechanical inspection. The Second ANGEL's EVA
apparently then malfunctioned, causing the multiple large explosions
noted by eye-witnesses.//

//It appears from our information that the second ANGEL, young Shinji
Ikari, sustained minor injuries during this battle, but that both he
and the EVA should be in working order soon.//

//That's all for now, more as updates are issued from NERV.//

***

Maya Ibuki looked up from the news report at her boss, who was
watching the television with a slight smile on her face. "Sir, how
could NERV... release misinformation like that?"

Ritsuko looked at her young pupil for a long moment. "It's
necessary," she said at last. "If every citizen on the street knew
everything that was going on, not only would there be widespread
panic, but the demons would soon know as well."

Maya was taken aback by her boss's smooth answer. "But it's...
wrong... People should know that the city is under attack by the
Ban'nin."

Ritsuko looked at her reproachfully. "People who develop too
many scruples always have trouble working with others. You'll see
once you get your hands dirty." Having said her fill, Ritsuko stood
up. "Will you close up for me tonight? It's been a long day, and I
need to get some sleep."

Maya nodded, and watched her boss leave, thinking about what
she had said.

***

Toji...

The voice whispered through the Medical Wing of NERV-HQ,
ethereally soft.

Toji...

A chill wind blew through the corridors of the Medical Wing,
deep within NERV-HQ. Maya Ibuki shivered at her desk, and tried to
work faster.

Toji...

In his bed, Toji Suzuhara stirred, mumbling.

Toji... Please wake up.

Toji blinked slowly awake, shivering in the cold air of his
room. What happened to the climate control?

Toji...

He gasped at the soft whisper of sound, so alien and yet...
familiar...

He sat up, clutching the blanket around his shoulders.

At the foot of his bed stood the apparition of a young girl,
arm outstretched toward him.

Toji tried to speak, to yell, to scream, he couldn't tell. And
he never found out, because no sound escaped his suddenly bone-dry
mouth.

The apparition held her hand out, imploring, and whispered
something. Then she faded away as though she had never been, leaving
the air empty and cold.

Please... Remember me...

Toji collapsed back onto his bed, breathing heavily. After a
few minutes the heaters kicked in, and the chill began to recede.
Sleep was a long time in coming.

***

"Commander Ikari. I must say that it disturbs me, the risk you
took with the second pilot."

Gendo sat looking at the people around the table calmly,
inscrutable as ever, hands folded before his mouth and dark glasses
hiding his eyes. To SEELE, the Throne of Souls, he was no less
inscrutable than to anyone else. "It was necessary. Besides, it was
foretold. The second Angel falls before the first Guardian, but in
his fall is contained victory. A mother is the secret to the will to
survive."

"Yes, well. Nevertheless, it endangered the Instrumentality
Project, and the pilot's convalescence has put us behind schedule."

"We will be back on schedule by noon tomorrow. The Fifth ANGEL
will be arriving shortly." Gendo smiled slightly, knowing that none
of them could see it.

"The Fifth ANGEL? You did not consult us about this."

"His being introduced earlier than expected only puts us ahead
of schedule."

"Perhaps. Commander Ikari, I must warn you. This council is
supreme. We all know that you serve no agenda other than your own;
the moment you no longer serve the purpose of SEELE is the moment
your life ends."

"Of course." Gendo nodded. "Will that be all?"

The head of SEELE stared at him for a long moment, inscrutable
behind his cyclopean eyepiece, before nodding. "Yes. You may go."

Gendo stood up and left the council room. Fuyutsuki met him at
the door.

"How did it go?"

Gendo grimaced, nearly a smile. "The fools believe they are
omniscient. The first step to failure is overconfidence."

The gray-haired doctor frowned. "They are in a much more
stable position than we. Everything we have worked for is still
hinged upon the fifth ANGEL."

"You worry too much, Fuyutsuki. That's not a good trait in
this business. We hold all the tiles... all the Winds and Dragons.
There is nothing they can do."

Fuyutsuki stopped, watching Gendo continue along the corridor.
"Secrets breed mistrust..." he said to himself softly.

***

End Part 2: Angel Fire

End Chapter 2: Truth in Dreams

***

Winded is the sailor
drifting by the storm...
wounded is the organ
he left all...
bloodied on the shore...

gorgeous was his savior
sees her... drowning
in his wake...
daily tastes the salt
of her tears, but...
chance blamed fate...

little secrets
tremors...
turned to quake

the
smallest oceans
still get...
big, big waves

ransom paid the devil...
he whispers pleasing words...
triumphant are the angels
if they can...
get there first...

little secrets
tremors...
turned to quake

the
smallest oceans
still get...
big, big waves

I'll decide
take the dive
take my time
not my life
wait for signs
believe in lies
to get by
it's divine!
OOOOH HO
you know what
it's like?

turns the bow back
tows and... drops the line...
puts his faith in love &...

tremor christ.

AUTHOR'S NOTES:

Well, here's the second chapter. Some of you probably
recognized what was on the television in the scene with Asuka... for
those who don't know, it's the opening to Serial Experiments Lain (a
very good, and very, very weird show).

Note that in Asuka's section where she tells herself she won't
cry I did include a small excerpt out of Faulkner's The Sound and the
Fury. I did not intend for this to infringe on his story in any way,
but as more of a tribute to the man who is possibly the greatest
writer in the history of America.

Also, tip of the hat to anyone who recognizes the song at the
end there.

Thanks to Tim for the tips on the NERV misinformation.

Until next time, Dan Riley signing off.

You can reach me at feithecontact@secondimpact.com.

Landscape of the Soul can be found at my website,
come.to/feithecontact.