Disclaimer: The characters of Higher Ground belong to Fox Family and are not my own.




Pura Vida (part 7)


*************** Scott's evaluation ****************************************


Peter: Well, we are finished Scott. It's been a year of tough decisions, and one of the toughest was taking back control over your life. I am proud of you. Not only because of your progress, but because you realized that you needed to come back, and not keep running from your problems.

Scott: Yeah. I think that lesson has been too hard to learn. Its just so much easier to run away from the things that bother you, and its also easier to pretend things didn't happen then it is to recognize that they did. I still can't believe my dad is still in denial. I am the one that had to go through it, and I'm not in denial anymore. Why is he? Why can't we really talk about it? I could be starting training for football again, but now...

Peter: but what? I think if you really, really had to play football, you would have just lived with the consequences of your Dad's refusal to talk. But you have realized something, haven't you Scott?

Scott: Yeah. Football used to be a god to me. My whole life revolved around it. Ever since I was little, football was a part of me. I was either playing football, going to camps, or working hard at being the best. It's what Dad and I always did together. We talked about football. We played football together. Dad coached my peewee football teams. He would take me to professional games when I was little and its still some of the best memories I have of my dad. Even when my parents split, I had football to get my anger out. But when all that happened with Elaine it didn't work anymore, and after all the different people I've met here and their problems..well, it just doesn't seem as important as feeling okay again. Don't get me wrong here, football is important; it was always the one thing I could count on. Catching a touchdown pass, well, I can't describe the feeling. It made me feel like an accomplishment. Like all my hard work paid off. But football is not enough now for my Dad and I. I want to talk about the important stuff, about what happened. But he only wanted to talk about football.

Peter: Wow, Scott. That was quite a reflection.

Scott: I know. I don't know what came over me. Ezra must be rubbing off on me or something.

Peter: Or maybe your becoming an adult. And now you want to be the strong person in your relationship with Shelby.

Scott: Maybe your right. I really was excited at what I saw as my second chance with my father...but then....well....

Peter: You were upset about leaving Shelby.

Scott: Yeah, I really don't know how I thought I could live a life away from her. I mean, she understands me. And going away from someone who understands you, well that breaks you down. I really wasn't ready to leave, but how could I refuse? I kept and keep thinking that football should be in my future because it was such a large part in my past.

Peter: It's hard to decide your future, but you do have time. Here (hands Scott a piece of paper), I want you to read this quote by Pascal, and then come talk to me about it later.

Scott: Sure. But aren't we going to talk about relationships and all that other stuff that has been going around?

Peter: Not right now. I trust you Scott, and I do trust that you and Shelby together has been good for both of you. You have made her smile, and she has made you stronger. Now go get Shelby for evaluation.

(Scott leaves. As he walks toward the lodge, he reads the words of Blaise Pascal on the paper Peter gave him:

For, after all, what is man to nature? A nothing in comparison with the
infinite, an absolute in comparison with nothing, a central point between
nothing and all. Infinitely far from understanding these extremes, the end
of things and their beginnings are hopelessly hidden from him in an
impenetrable secret. He is equally incapable of seeing the nothingness from
which he came, and the infinite in which he is engulfed. What else then will he perceive but some appearance of the middle of things, in an eternal despair of knowing either their principle or their purpose? All things emerge from nothing and are born onward to infinity. Who can follow this marvelous process?
)

Scott: Okay, looks like I will need Ezra's help on this one.... (walks into lodge). Hey Shelby, its your turn!

Shelby: Great...I am off to see the wizard.

Scott: Maybe it won't be so bad, although he did give me homework. (Shelby leaves). Hey Ezra, can you give me hand with this?

Ezra: Sure. What is it?

Scott: Read this and tell me what it means. (Ezra reads it, and then smiles). What?

Ezra: Pascal is saying that man should only reason within a middle plane. (Scott looks dumbfounded). Let me explain this better....uhm...keep your attention focused on the present instead of the past or the future, because the present, the middle, is the only process a man can follow. Got it?

Scott: Yeah. It makes sense with what we were talking about. Thanks.

Ezra: No problem. Welcome back to the never-ending group.




************* Shelby's evaluation ***********************

Shelby: Aren't we through yet?

Peter: Just a few more things. First, I know you can do better in your schoolwork, especially science. I think you should take a science course this summer instead of having the same schedule as Scott.

Shelby: But I wanted to spend more time with him...(under her breath) since he almost left me..

Peter: I know that. But you also have your own life, and your interests are different from Scott's and finally..if you want to graduate, then it will be essential that you pass one more science course.

Shelby: Well, when you put it that way....where's the laboratory?

Peter: Good. There will be another Cliffhanger joining you...David.

Shelby: David! (sarcastically) Great, just great! A novel concept...teaching science to the poster child of MAD magazine.

Peter: Shelby! How many times do I have to tell you guys that (Shelby joins in with a mocking tone) respecting others is respecting yourself!

Shelby: okay, okay. Can I go now? Wait, we haven't had THE TALK yet. (Peter smiles) Well?

Peter: Alright. Shelby, your relationship with Scott has had both dramatic and positive consequences. Despite your obvious hickey, I trust you guys will trust in the rules here at Horizon. Okay...is that good enough for you?

Shelby: That's it? To tell the truth, I am kind of disappointed. I expected one of those terrible and very personal therapy session-like talks. Oh well (says sarcastically) maybe next time.

Peter: The last order of business is Kat's party. Is everything ready?

Shelby: I think. The only thing left is to BUY (heavily emphasized) a cake.

Peter: Already done, and sitting in the fridge at home. The plan is the same. Soph and I will ask Kat to come talk about counseling around 6:00 tonight while you guys get the lodge ready. Look for us around seven. Okay?

Shelby: Sounds good.

Peter: Well, NOW you can go, Shelby.

Shelby: Okay, but I want to ask about Jess, how is she doing? We haven't really talked lately. She got settled in, apparently made some friends, and voila now I embarrass her. (Shelby is smiling the whole time she talks of her sister, but the smile fails to reach her eyes as she thinks over the life they have both endured).

Peter: Jess is doing fine. She loves you very much, Shelby. (Peter puts a hand on her shoulder). She loves you more than her anger. Anything else?

Shelby: (quietly) Thanks, Peter. Guess we're done. I'll go get Auggie.



************* Auggie's Evaluation *******************************

Peter: Well, Auggie. I am not happy with the continued fighting, and believe me when I say that the consequences will be getting more severe. As for other things, your grades have improved very much since we discovered your dyslexia. However, you still have to retake two English courses this summer...American Literature and World Literature. The rest is up to you.

Auggie: cool, man. Don't worry about the English stuff. Jules will help me out, and I have tapes.

Peter (looks agitated at the mention of Jules): Auggie, you and Juliette's relationship has had some very negative consequences, such as the running away and the shoplifting. You are on probation again because of your relationship. You don't stop to think about the consequences to yourself when it comes to Jules, and that, at times, has been a problem, but at other times has been positive for both of you. However, it is important for Juliette to learn how to stand on her own and be strong for herself. Do you understand?

Auggie: Yeah, man. But Jules is stronger than you think. I know our friendship is strange, but she motivates me. She puts me there in the clouds, man....and that feeling well... (struggles for the words)... I want to protect it.

Peter: Believe me Auggie, I understand. But life changes, circumstances change. Just as you had to learn with your brother, you DO have your own life. Okay?

Auggie: Sure, but I also think that when you feel strongly about someone.... what you do and what they do will connect somehow. Do you keep your "own life" separate from Sophie?

Peter: This is not my evaluation Auggie, nor my future we are discussing. I just want you to think about some things. I am not telling you to stop being Juliette's friend, but to include the consequences when you decide next time to disregard those concerning yourself. Okay?

Auggie: It's cool. I do think about my future, and being an artist. I dream now man, and mostly I have to thank you and Jules. Can I go get her now?

Peter: Not yet. First, I want to talk about the upcoming probation hearing. And your parents want to visit a couple of times this summer and we need to set the dates.



************** Juliette's evaluation ************************************


Peter: Well, Juliette, we have a lot to talk about. I am not that upset about your weight because you're healthy in that respect. But no more skipping meals, or you will be working in the kitchen. Okay?

Juliette: Okay. I guess now we're going to be talking about the physical. Right?

Peter: Why Jules? Why not let the cuts heal? I don't understand.

Juliette: I'm not cutting.

Peter: I know that, but the concept is the same. By not letting your cuts heal, then you don't have to make new cuts. Am I right? (Juliette remains quiet). I want to help you Juliette, but you have to be honest with me.

Juliette: Fine. OKAY. you are right. Sometimes it's the only thing that will keep me from cutting. (Jules closes her eyes, and folds her arms). The simple fact that the old wounds aren't healing will then make me forget to make new ones. Old wounds for old pains, new wounds for new ones. (Jules opens her eyes).

Peter: Thanks for being honest with me. Now it's mine turn to be honest with you. I am worried Jules. Very worried about you. I guess there is no way to say it but to say it. Your mom called today and she wants you to come home for the summer term.

Juliette: What!! She can't do that!

Peter: She wants you to get to know your new family. She told me...

Juliette: I don't care what she told you. I'm not going! I wasn't even invited to the wedding! I mean, why now?

Peter: I don't know. But she is sending a car on Friday.

Juliette: Friday! Friday! (Jules stands up and starts pacing) But that is only 3 days away! How can she do this to me? She doesn't like me with Auggie! She's trying to control me...she's

Peter: JULIETTE!! Please calm down. Despite my convictions, your mother seemed sincere. She told me that she does love and miss you.

Juliette (sits down, looking defeated): She brought me here to get my "sick" self out of her sight, and now when I finally feel settled, she wants me. Why is she doing this to me? Why?

Peter: I don't know. But the question is what are you going to do. And I hope it doesn't involve any type of running. Remember your tools. You need to face her, Jules. You will not be free until you do. (Peter thinks...***but I'm not sure you are ready***). You can keep in touch with us, call us anytime you need us, and write. Soph and I will check up on you.

Juliette: But it's not the same. ( as she thinks of how Auggie will react and to leaving him it appears that her body retracts into a fragile shell). Peter, can I go now? I'm really tired, and I want to rest before Kat's party tonight.

Peter: I really think we should talk some more, Juliette. Your emotions aren't wrong right now, but you shouldn't keep them in. (looks long and carefully at Jules, and sighs at the stagnant frustration filling the air). Okay...go rest. But I'm sending Sophie to check on you in an hour.

(Peter watches Jules leave).


"We laugh, we cry, we are born, we die. Who will riddle the how and the why?"
(Alfred Lord Tennyson).

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Next time: talking of the events; Kat's party