Title: Letters To No One: Tomoe Hotaru
Part Two of Two
Part Two: Mending
Rated: PG
Disclaimer: Luna nauta non mea.
Thank You's: A TON of thanks to Sailor Opal!

~~~~
On Saturn, the wreckage was immense. Bodies were flung haphazardly around, like a child's blocks. Males, females, elders, children. None were spared.
A pair of ghostly violet eyes surveyed the planet sadly, then stopped on an altar, where a young girl lay, untouched except for the silver blade embedded in her heart.
The spirit of Sailor Saturn, dressed in a dark purple and white fuku, with the Silence Glaive in hand, drifted over to the body she had recently been inhabiting. After a long moment, Saturn lifted her ghostly, silver Glaive and, with a flick of her wrist, sliced off the long length of braid that floated behind her.
For Sailor Saturn, the spirit, the length of braid simply disappeared. For the body of the young queen, the braid fell from the altar, landing in a coil on the platform.
It was an act as sacred as an oath written in blood.
For the spirit of Saturn, the cutting of the braid represented the cutting off of her past. Her loss of innocence. The awakening of herself, Sailor Saturn, a part of the young queen which had never quite been brought to the surface. And she made a vow that, as a reminder of this moment, she would leave her hair shorn short until the time came that she could safely forget what had happened on Saturn, during the reign of Queen Serenity in the Silver Millennium.
~~~~
The three Outer senshi, Pluto, Neptune, and Uranus, stepped from the circle of light that had transported them to the planet Saturn, deep inside the castle of Tacere, which was, oddly enough, untouched. They stepped toward the large window and looked out upon the carnage of the planet Saturn.
The usually calm and seemingly unaffected Pluto uttered a gasp of outrage and disbelief, as Neptune stepped closer to Uranus and grasped her hand. Uranus bore a slight scowl on her face.
Pluto whirled from the window, and had taken only two steps toward the door when she stopped and looked around. The room was of medium size, and rather plain. The embers in the fireplace had ceased to live, and a few ashes had drifted from their proper place and were now scattered around a small book on the floor, which was lying in an awkward position sure to give it bent pages. Pluto scooped it up and delicately wiped off the cover.
"Legends of the Moon and the Senshi," she whispered softly, reading the title. It was obviously a favorite of whoever had occupied this room, the dog-eared pages and bent spine bearing testimony to this fact.
"Pluto," Uranus said suddenly, walking quickly over to her, "Look at this."
Pluto took from Uranus's hand a small diamond that glittered in the faint light of the room. Neptune looked over her shoulder at the small gem.
"Small, but perfect," Neptune said softly, examining the gem. "I wonder who's room this was?"
"I think I know," Uranus called from the other side of the room, where she had been examining the wardrobe for clues. "The queen's, I do believe." As proof she held up a small velvet dress that practically dripped with diamonds and amethysts. Had the three known the queen a few hours earlier, they would have known that she detested that particular dress because of it's gaudiness. The simple dress of finely wrought violet linen that rested next to it in the wardrobe was much more to her tastes.
Uranus opened up a small drawer in the wardrobe and held up another piece of evidence: another circlet of silver, this one with a saying etched in Saturnian, which none of the three could read.
The room was silent for a moment.
"Let's leave the castle. It is considered rude to invade a fellow Senshi's privacy." Pluto said after a moment. Neptune and Uranus nodded silently in agreement and started for the door.
Pluto hesitated momentarily, hand hovering over a small table, about to place the diamond onto the surface. Her hand loosened slightly, then clenched, before she tucked it into her Dimensional pocket and followed the other two senshi out the door. She couldn't help but feel that the gem was special somehow.
~~~~
Saturn turned her head slightly toward the castle, a translucent hand holding the Glaive tightly.
She could feel it, somewhere deep inside. Three of the other senshi where here, on Saturn. More precisely, in the untouched castle of Tacere.
She slowly sat down on the rim of the bloodstained altar, waiting for the three to come out into the sunlight.
~~~~
Pluto caught up to Neptune and Uranus near the outer door or the castle. The three
exchanged a look before Uranus grabbed a hold of the door handles, pulling them open.
The first thing they saw was a platform, one of the only two structures on Saturn that had withstood the Silence. It stood out against the broken landscape a mile or so away from the palace. They decided unanimously that it was just as good a place as any to start.
So together, they started out for the platform in the midst of the ruins of Tacere.
~~~~
Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto stared across the platform at Saturn, who stared back from her position in front of the altar, shielding their eyes from the body of the young queen.
Uranus broke the silence bluntly and angrily. "Why did you do this? Who are you?"
"I am Sailor Saturn," the spirit replied softly. "Senshi of Death and Rebirth."
"Rebirth!" Uranus spat out angrily. "You've killed an entire planet through your
foolishness."
Saturn's eyes grew sad. "Your words are partially true, Uranus. I was foolish as the ruler of this planet. Naïve. I never tried to make any contact with Queen Serenity as a way to bring Saturn into friendship with the other planets. As a result, my people were shunned, and they became bitter. However, I never knew they were so bitter as to do this." She stepped aside, allowing the three to look upon the body of the young queen, who was, without a doubt, Saturn. "They sacrificed me in hopes of a life where they would not be shunned by the others of this galaxy. The Silence, which had been held in my body, was released."
The other three senshi felt, in their hearts, that what she spoke was true.
"Your people hated you so much they killed you?" Neptune asked quietly, tears pooling in her eyes. Saturn gave her one small nod, drifting forward slightly, while Uranus hesitantly walked over to the altar. She lifted a hand to caress the child's hair softly. A few tears slipped down her cheeks as she quietly sat down on the edge of the altar, cradling the young queen's upper body in her arms. Her soft tears fell onto the child's cheeks as she cried without sound on the altar.
As Uranus was mourning over the child's body, Pluto stepped forward. "As the senshi of Saturn, you should have been one of us. One of the Outers."
"As part of the Outer senshi, we have no one but each other. We know, in a small way, what you have felt these past years," Neptune said softly, joining Pluto.
"The loneliness," Pluto said quietly.
"The cold looks people give you as they pass," Neptune whispered.
"I have never had anyone but myself to depend on," Saturn whispered faintly, her voice carried gently by the wind.
"As long as we have known, the Outers have only been three. But now," Pluto hesitated, holding out her hand to Saturn, "They can be four."
Saturn regarded the hand that Pluto held out to her. She knew that if she took Pluto's hand, it would signify a vow of sisterhood. Of friendship. A vow far more sacred than the cutting of her braid. It would solidify an unbreakable bond between the Outer Senshi, untouchable even in death. Neptune nodded decisively, grasping Pluto's other hand, as she and Pluto looked at Saturn and Uranus expectantly, both looking on fondly as they took in the sight of Uranus mourning on the altar. Uranus looked up, sensing their eyes on her. Glancing at their hands, she understood immediately. She hesitated slightly, then stood up, gently laying the child back on the altar. She walked over to the three senshi, gently taking the hand Neptune held out to her. She stretched out her other hand to Saturn.
Holding up one finger to signify she would need a moment, Saturn turned toward the body of the young queen on the altar. She walked swiftly over to the altar, where she placed her ghostly hand over the wound on the body of the young queen. Concentrating, a ghostly purple glow emanated from her hand, washing over the body.
There was a crackle of energy, and an explosion of light. When it dimmed, four pairs of eyes looked on to see the young queen standing once more, her fatal wound healed and the silver blade lying neatly on the altar, beside the braid, which now lay coiled beside it. She held the now solid Glaive in her hands. The spirit of Saturn smiled at her softly, then at the three senshi, who looked rather aghast.
Saturn and the young queen exchanged a glance, then Saturn stepped forward, melding with the young queen. There was a ripple of light, and suddenly Saturn, with Glaive in hand, stood before them, alive once more.
She placed her Glaive on the altar, then stepped forward, and placed her now solid hand softly in Pluto's. Exchanging smiles, the four simply stood there for a second, watching each other.
"On this planet we pledge a vow of friendship and loyalty," Uranus said softly, breaking the silence. "Out of tragedy, good has come forth. Out of hate, love has sprung.
"As the Senshi of Sky, Uranus."
"As the Senshi of Death and Rebirth, Saturn."
"As the Senshi of Embrace, Neptune."
"As the Senshi of Revolution, Pluto."
"We pledge to be sisters, a family, eternally. We also pledge eternal loyalty to the Royal Family of the Moon, and our fellow Senshi. So mote it be."
A ripple of warmth, and some unidentifiable emotion, swept through all four as they stood in the circle, holding hands. Slowly, they all released each others hands, stepping back, unsure of what to do next.
After a few moments of silence, Pluto plucked the diamond from her Dimensional pocket, and placed it in Saturn's hand. Saturn smiled softly, then closed her eyes tightly. The diamond glowed brightly before disappearing from her hand and reappearing in the hilt of the Glaive. It glowed brightly in the silver hilt, and the Outers- no longer only three senshi- exchanged a look.
After a few moments, Saturn dropped her transformation, reverting back to her form as the young queen. The Silence Glaive disappeared along with her fuku, in a shimmer of silver and purple. The other three followed her example and dropped their transformations also, Uranus looking uncomfortable in the dress she was wearing.
Saturn turned slightly, looking at the altar and the objects that lay on top of it. Hesitantly, she picked up the dagger, stroking it lightly with her fingertips. The blood-stains had disappeared, and the dagger shone like new in her hands. She pursed her lips slightly in concentration as the other three looked on.
She smiled, and tucked the dagger neatly and securely into her belt, patting it lightly with her hand.
Turning to the three, she began to speak. "My people are no more, the light of their eyes dimmed by a sweep of a ghostly Glaive, which I carried inside myself till now.
"Their eyes, which glowed with an unearthly light that marked the people of Saturn, were always compared with the fireflies of the distant planet Earth, the shimmering insects that light up the summer skies, much like the stars." She paused, drawing in a ragged breath. "I was never told my name."
The three looked at her in surprise and horror. None of them could imagine going through life without a name. Your name is your identity; it defines who you are. To live without a name is to be a faceless entity in the sea of humanity.
"I'm sure my parents gave me one when I was born," Saturn continued, "But after they died, I was never referred to as anything except for 'Your Majesty' or 'Saturn no Senshi.'"
"And so, on this day I shall choose a name for myself, one I will use in memory of my people and my beloved parents." Her eyes glowed faintly with an inner light as she smiled softly.
"My name is Hotaru, after the eyes my people were so well known for. For, through me, I will make sure their legacy lives on through the ages."
In the Time Gate, I felt almost a merging of souls with this wide-eyed child. By the taking on of a name and the family she had gained in the Outer Senshi, she had become the person I would later be. I felt whole once more.
"Then Hotaru," Pluto said a few seconds later, "I welcome you to the family." She
stepped forward and hugged me gently. "I am lesser known as Setsuna."
"Michiru," Neptune said as she hugged me.
"Haruka," the blond senshi introduced herself, stepping forward. Smiling mischievously, she continued, "I always wanted a little sister," while lifting me off of my feet in an exuberant embrace.
When I was once more on my feet, I looked up at Haruka with a glint in my eye. "If you're so eager to pick me up…" I began slyly.
"Yes?" Haruka asked guardedly, stretching out the small syllable.
"Can you give me a piggy-back ride?" I finished, grinning impishly.
Setsuna burst out laughing as Haruka sweatdropped. "Hotaru, I'm afraid I'm going to steal the privilege of giving you your first piggy-back ride," Setsuna said cheerfully. "I gave those two their first, so I feel this is my privilege."
I grinned and ran over to Setsuna, who obligingly bent down and let me climb on.
Straightening, Setsuna looked over at Michiru and Haruka. "I think it's time we took our new sister to meet Queen Serenity," she said cheerfully.
A flash of fear crossed my face, and I momentarily tightened my arms around Setsuna's neck. Setsuna reached up and patted my hand sympathetically. "Have no fear, little one," she whispered. "Serenity is a loving person and a wise ruler. You have nothing to fear from her."
I nodded, slightly assured by her words. "We'll have to go back to the room you entered Saturn by in order to leave." I said softly.
"I believe that it was your room," Haruka said as she and Michiru came forward.
I nodded slightly and jerked my head toward the palace. "Let's go then."
We laughed and talked cheerfully on the way to the palace. However, their was an
underlying tension beneath our happy bantering. I was nervous because I would be meeting the famed Queen Serenity, ruler of much of the galaxy. They were nervous because I was nervous, I believe.
By the time we had reached my room, I felt as if I had known these people all my life. I was still on Setsuna's back, and she was beginning to show a bit of wear. Once in my room, I slid off her back and walked over to the table near the fireplace. I picked up my cherished book, and tucked it into a small satchel from the wardrobe. I knew, deep in my heart, that it was unlikely I would ever come back to my planet again. So I gathered up my few personal possessions: the book, a collection of fairy tales, mainly; a ring which once belonged to my mother; my henshin stick; and a few articles of clothing. I also threw in another of the plain silver circlets that signified my rank, although I wondered if I would ever use it. I would keep it, however, as a reminder of my childhood, however lonely it may have been. The dagger I kept strapped at my waist, although
I carefully selected a sheath for it before we left.
We joined hands in the middle of the room, and I indulged myself in one last look around and out the window. I promised myself that I would never forget my planet, my home. And excluding the couple of memory lapses I have had, I have never forgotten.
"Pluto Crystal Power, Make Up!"
"Neptune Crystal Power, Make Up!"
"Uranus Crystal Power, Make Up!"
"Saturn Crystal Power, Make Up!"
"Sailor Planet Teleport!" we said in sync after our transformations. A brief white light surrounded us, and when it departed we where standing in the middle of Queen Serenity's throne room.
Full court was in session. Besides the courtiers, the Inners, Princess Serenity, and Queen Serenity were also there. The room grew silent as we walked the rest of the way up to Queen Serenity's throne. Although I had been reduced to nearly mythical status, the courtiers recognized me and drew away in horror, all the while wondering how Serenity would react to this.
She met us halfway to her throne. We knelt respectfully, and she calmly motioned for us to stand.
I took a deep breath, then stepped forward slightly. "Queen Serenity," I began, my tone belying the fact that I was shaking inside, "My planet lies in ruins."
The courtiers gave a horrified gasp, all the while leaning forward so they could have a better view of Serenity kicking me out on my rear.
"My closest advisors plotted to have me killed in a sacrifice. During the ceremony, after they had plunged the dagger into my heart, the Silence was released, killing the people of Saturn." I paused. "My senshi spirit brought me back to life shortly after Uranus, Pluto, and Neptune arrived.
"My planet is empty of life now, and I have discovered my senshi powers. I beg of you, Queen Serenity, to allow me to be one of the Outer Senshi, a protector of the Moon Kingdom."
My heart thudded in my chest at the end of my speech. It had neither been clean nor polished, instead it had been from the heart, and rather blunt. Queen Serenity's face was bare of emotion as she stared into my eyes.
The courtiers, senshi, and Princess Serenity all leaned forward, waiting to hear her
judgment.
"Saturn," she began in a smooth, even voice, "The deaths of your people are tragic. Your planet is in ruins, your home destroyed."
My hopes began sinking rather quickly, and I dropped my chin to stare at the ground.
"And it is my hope you will accept a home here, on the Moon, and become one of my senshi, both in title in spirit." She lifted my chin and smiled at me. "Welcome home, Saturn no Senshi."
The courtiers broke out cheering as the senshi, both Inners and Outers, flooded forward to embrace me. And it was at the moment, Friend, that I felt, for the first time, truly at home.
~~~~
Back in the Gate, the image dissipated and the window once again became a featureless black.
My parents were silent behind me, waiting for me to make the first move. I turned and looked at them for a moment, then smiled. They smiled back tentatively.
A thought came into my mind, and I voiced it. "Did… did you only bring me here to show me this?" I asked curiously.
"No, that's not the only thing," Setsuna-mama said with a faint smile. "Follow me."
Like ducklings following their mother, we followed her to a small portal. She whispered a few words, and it began to shimmer. "Hotaru-chan, we need you to transform."
I nodded and held up my henshin stick. "Saturn Crystal Power, Make Up!" Familiar purple light washed over my body, and I emerged in my senshi form, fuku rippling in non-existent wind. "Ready!"
"Then step through," Setsuna-mama said, motioning toward the portal.
With myself in the lead, we stepped through one by one, ending up on the same spot where we had originally made our silent vows of sisterhood.
My braid still lay on the altar. It looked exactly the same as it has when I had cut it off so long ago. The altar also looked untouched, although the palace, which had withstood the Silence, was now dust. Somehow the altar had ended up on the ground, although wooden platform had long since become one with the sandy soil.
"It looks a lot like it did on that day so long ago," Michiru-mama said softly from beside me.
"Yes," I agreed in a whisper, as I pulled a small object from my Dimensional Pocket. It was the same silver circlet I had brought from my childhood home so many years ago, the same circlet Uranus had pointed out to Neptune and Pluto. The words written in the Saturnian alphabet were quite appropriate, I thought wryly in that moment. Literally translated, it meant, 'The future sprouts from the soil of the reborn past.' Yes, quite appropriate. I walked over to the altar, where I laid the circlet at the head of the great stone. Lifting the shorn braid, I held it in my hands for a moment, before nestling it inside the circlet. Smiling, I turned and walked over to my parents, who awaited me a few feet from the altar.
In unspoken agreement, we all gathered in a circle on the platform, hands clasped.
"Brought together by tragedy," I began softly, "We four pledged a vow of sisterhood.
"As the Senshi of Death and Rebirth, Saturn."
"As the Senshi of Revolution, Pluto."
"As the Senshi of Embrace, Neptune."
"As the Senshi of Sky, Uranus."
"We pledge to be sisters, a family, eternally," we said together. "We also pledge our loyalty to Princess Serenity of the Moon Kingdom, the daughter of Queen Serenity. So mote it be."
~~~~
This happened a few centuries ago, after Galaxia but before the 'big freeze,' as we senshi call it. I'm now, as you know, twenty (Give or take a few hundred years). I have finally allowed the memory of the betrayal on Saturn be put to rest, and allowed my hair to grow back. I can never truly forget the betrayal, but I now see it in a different light, and I no longer have the nightmares I used to have about it.
And yes, the dagger you've seen me carry at times is the dagger from Saturn. Shortly after we renewed our vows of sisterhood I found it, along with my childhood book of fairy tales and my mother's ring, in my Dimensional Pocket. The silver circlet, as you know, is still on Saturn, although whether it is still whole, no one knows. The small diamond that the moonlight created from my tears is still in the hilt of my Glaive.
Although I felt it impossible, my joy increased a year ago when I gave birth to my first born daughter, Tamanna.* With my small daughter, my husband Shingo, and my 'sisters'- although they will always be like my parents to me- I finally feel complete.
And so, I remain your friend,
Tsukino Tomoe Hotaru
~~~~
*Tamanna: A Hindi name meaning 'Wish.'