A/N I'm going to update my long fic soon, I promise. But I also found a meme... Damn the internet.
John had snuck into the New York Public library after hours; he knew he couldn't be caught, not after Winston shot him off the roof. But there was something very important he had left in a book.
He walked over to the Russian section and to the very book he needed. Before he got the chance to open it a set of doors burst open.
"Why did we run into a library?" Donna shouted, "We're getting chased by an alien and you think that books are going to help!"
John instinctively pulled out his gun, and got behind the shelf, hoping that he would remain unseen. But he could help but ponder what they were saying.
"But books are the greatest weapons in the world!" The Doctor replied
"You can't kill some one with a book."
That's wrong, John thought, thinking back to the last time he was inside this library.
"It's not the actual book, Donna, its what's inside it."
"What? The paper."
John took a moment to appreciate the level of sass radiating from this woman.
"No! The knowledge!"
"You can't shoot someone with knowledge, Doctor! We need a weapon!"
"We're not shooting anybody. This creature is from the planet Neznam which influenced some Russian folklore back when they were in exile. I just can't remember how to stop them."
John was taken aback, these two were talking about aliens like they were an absolute thing and not just something depicted in the movies. They're crazy.
"We're in the Russian section in the library so you can do some light reading!?"
"You can help," The Doctor said, running to one of the shelves.
"I can't read Russian."
"Yes, you can. Remember, TARDIS translation circuits?"
"They can translate Russian?"
"YES! Theres only a few languages it can't do!"
John was now certain that they were some nut jobs. He had to get out of here before someone other than nut jobs came looking for him.
"What's the name of this creature anyway?" Donna asked, running up to a different bookshelf.
"It's called the Baba Yaga, they are known on Earth in Russian folktales."
"Alright, I've got it. That's disgusting!"
"What is it!?"
"This book has dried blood on it."
"I guess someone really did use it as a weapon," The Doctor remarked.
No sooner did he finish his sentence did the doors burst open with an animalistic scream.
"Hurry!" The Doctor said as he started reading books at lightning speeds whereas Donna was stuck reading one word at a time.
The crashing and screeching were getting closer and closer by the second, and John realised that they weren't kidding. Something was coming.
He crept up to where the two were, scaring the daylights out of donna.
"O!" Donna said, in shock.
"Oh, hello," The Doctor said, peering through the bookshelf.
"The only way to get away from the Baba Yaga is to blow three horns at increasing volume, then a firebird should come take you to safety."
"Oh, that's what it was! I can be so thick," The Doctor said, smacking his forehead.
"Where are we supposed to get three horns from? We should have run into a museum instead!"
"Come on, I've got any idea," The Doctor said, running over to one of the tables with Donna and John meeting him there. The Doctor begun emptying his pockets, "Did it ever say what type of horns they were?"
"No, it's just a folk tale."
"All folk tales come from somewhere."
"You're telling me that aliens are behind every folk tale."
"Not all of them, but most of them."
The Doctor had now emptied a considerable amount of contents from his pockets onto the table including a yo-yo, some Legos, a kazoo, some jelly babies, several handkerchiefs, a few quid, some gold doubloons, an electric watch, a half-solved Rubik's cube, a clown horn, some pennies, and a few other things neither Donna nor John could identify. And the Doctor was still going.
"How'd all that fit in your pockets?" Donna asked.
"They're bigger on the inside."
"That's rubbish."
"Really?" The Doctor said, pulling out a massive flashlight.
That's impossible, John thought, But so is that.
"We're out of time, Doctor!" Donna said, pointing to the figure of the Baba Yaga.
It was smaller than John had thought but still had the boney crow like legs and Iron teeth that the legends spoke of. Its legs were really long though, and its hair was silver; it was pretty easy to be mistaken as a creepy old woman by some drunk Russian stumbling through the woods.
"I need a third horn!" The Doctor said, grabbing the kazoo and clown horn from the table.
The Baba Yaga unleashed an animalistic screech and charged at them.
"RUN!"
Donna didn't have to be told twice, she followed behind the Doctor. The one thing they had learned was that the Baba Yaga had a tough time maneuvering around things.
John, however, did not know this. He didn't even believe that the Baba Yaga existed. He knew that things would probably go south, but not in this fashion. He wanted to pull out his gun, but he wasn't even sure if his gun would be effective. How do you fight the boogeyman?
Don't think, just do.
John stopped thinking and just relied on his instincts; he pulled out his gun but followed behind the 2 Brits. They weaved through bookshelves and tables as the Baba Yaga fell further and further behind. They paused for a moment to catch their breaths.
"Hold on, what was your name again?" The Doctor asked.
"John."
"Well, I'd say it's lovely to meet you, but I don't like people who carry guns."
I don't blame you, John thought. But his face conveyed it.
"Doctor!" Donna shouted, "We would have been eaten by that thing if he hadn't helped us!"
"Yeah, but he still has a gun."
"We're in America! Everyone carries a gun."
John took the hint and put his gun away, he could take it out quickly if he needed to.
"Well, I'm not carrying a gun."
"You're not American! You're not even human! We would be dead if it weren't for him! Which," Donna turned to John, "Thank you for helping us," She turned back to the Doctor, "Brings me back to how do we stop this alien?"
"With three horns and I've only got two."
"What do we do about the third one?"
"Have you got a horn?"
"A horn. What makes you think I've got a horn?"
"You've got pockets, don't you?"
"Pockets? I barely have pockets for my mobile. How can I fit a horn in my pockets?"
"Car horn," John said, he had been keeping any eye out for the Baba Yaga and he didn't like how close the crashing and screeching were getting.
"Car horn," The Doctor muttered, then smacked his forehead, "CAR HORN! That's brilliant!"
The trio turned to run back outside just as the Baba Yaga ran into the corridor. It was gaining on them fast.
"We're not gonna make it!" Donna shouted.
"We're gonna make it!" The Doctor said, pushing himself to run even faster.
John knew that they weren't going to make it; not unless he did something. He pulled out his gun and fired off a few shots at the alien. The Doctor protested but John didn't care; it was him or the alien. But the bullets did little to the alien other than make it scream out and charge even faster. John quickly changed his tactics from his normal body shots to shooting at the knees. They weren't easy to hit but he managed to shoot out one of the knees. That slowed the creature enough and they were able to put distance between them and it.
They ran outside and Donna managed to grab a rather large book and wedge it in the main doors while the Doctor locked it using his sonic screwdriver.
The Doctor looked angry, and he was about to let it out on John when Donna cut him off.
"Doctor, what's the plan now?"
"We need to keep the Baba Yaga in one place so it can hear all of the horns, without shooting it."
"How do you plan to do that?"
"We're in an open area, it can't be too hard. We just have to lure it to a car."
They ran down the many front steps hoping to find a car at the curb; it was New York, of course they would find one.
The library doors burst open with a horrid screech and the book went flying past them. The Baba Yaga was much too fast for the trio running down the steps.
"Donna, take these!" The Doctor shouted tossing her the kazoo and clown horn.
"What am I supposed to do with these?"
"Play them once we reach the car!"
But they weren't going to make it to the car, John would have to step in again, and he didn't want to. He just wanted a peaceful trip to the library to grab the photo of him and Helen.
He also didn't want to be killed by a Baba Yaga.
John grabbed the book and turned around just in time to catch the Baba Yaga's claws swiping down at him. The claws were sharp, and the book barely held together, but it managed.
The Doctor turned to look back at John and was surprised he wasn't dead.
John took the claw marked book and hit one of the Baba Yaga's knees, hard, crumpling it to the ground.
"Now, Donna!" The Doctor shouted, running up beside a parked car.
Donna blew into the Kazoo, it wasn't supper loud, but it grabbed the Baba Yaga's attention.
The Doctor got the window of the car open using his sonic screwdriver as Donna squeezed the clown horn. The Baba Yaga was starting to move towards Donna, completely forgetting about John. The Doctor slammed his palm on the middle of the steering wheel, letting the car horn ring out through out the street. Good thing it was New York so no one paid it any mind.
The Baba Yaga stopped in its tracks, turning its menacing face towards the Doctor. The trio could feel the malice radiating off the creature but before it could act on it, John saw what could only be described as a firebird come down from the sky. It flew over the Baba Yaga and scooped it up with a red beam then flew away.
"Well, we shouldn't be seeing her any time soon," The Doctor said, walking up to Donna.
"I hope not, it was terrifying. But you're right, Doctor," Donna said, gesturing to John, "Books are the best weapons in the world."
"I suppose you're right. Come on."
"Where are we going?"
"I've got to collect the things from my pockets."
"The library is huge, are you sure you'll be able to find everything?"
"I could show you a bigger library if you like. Come on," The Doctor said, walking up the stairs towards the library.
Donna turned to John, "He won't say thank you, but I will. Thanks for saving us back there."
John nodded in response. He got what he came for and he should really get going so he isn't spotted. Knowing his luck, it's probably to late for that. He would just have to make it to his hideout through the shadows.
So... What did you think? Let me know!
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