Part IV- Playing
Draco couldn't believe that he had actually missed this chaos while he had been back at his house. Now the noise seemed to throb around him, as though it was alive and impatient to live out the best it could. It was always the same in the morning; the echoing hall tried to dress down for the occasion, but the racket the students made as they shovelled in their breakfasts was a sufficient substitute for the lack of occasion. It was a fact however, that the larger the crowd around you, the more alone you were. In the midst of the chatter, Draco sat thinking about the last few days and what they had done for him.
He was certainly better in health for his little recuperation period, but what the time had really given him, was the chance to do a little research and a little thinking.
It had been awkward. Very Awkward.
He didn't really know how to look at his father after the scene he witnessed. But that didn't matter much, as after the trip home, Lucius disappeared into his study and Draco didn't see him again while he was home for the weekend.
He had always known that Snape had started Hogwarts when Lucius was in his 5th year.
That was why Snape favoured him of course…he *knew* Draco's father…why else?
But. But. This changed everything.
Lucius was gay- and Draco had had no idea. He thought of his mother. Did she know? Did she care? They didn't seem to love each other. They didn't seem to be even aware of each other, as if they were living in different worlds altogether. He had gone back to his house with these thoughts jumping around in his mind. His mother. His father. His teacher.
Snape had changed in Draco's eyes. It was hard to think of him in any way other than a teacher. He was almost an inanimate object incapable of feeling. It was the same with Lucius. Father. And yet he saw them together now. Why wasn't it obvious before? When had Lucius ever come to collect him?
At least some of the burning questions had been answered now. His house was filled with its own history, which it sometimes yearned to tell and sometimes guarded possessively. This secret past of unfaithful men was blurted out to him as soon as he asked. The walls whispered and pulled him along until he found everything. Every detail about that story. Every unloved wife, every craving husband. Lucius' father had been abusive and abused and his father and his father- a long line of unhappiness and masked truth. A book of dark past, vengeful still to haunt Draco. And for the first time, he understood the misery that beat within the house. Each crack and corner sucking in the depression.
A foul wind.
But was Draco brave enough to fight it?
With history over him, would his will power be enough to free him?
At least the tale also spoke of homosexuals within the family. It was there but hidden by the want of tradition and 'wholesomeness'. Disgusting to hide. At least it was accepted within the stone walls. But Draco- he could feel the past in his blood; the pulse of revenge and need for satisfaction.
Oh, Draco hated this. Draco hated Harry and the way Harry made him needy. He hated being what he was and being attracted to the boy. But he would have it. It was a material thing. And so Draco would have it. Denial out of the question, Harry would succumb.
A clatter of chairs brought him back to the present. The hall was emptying; pupils hurrying to get to their lessons. Lessons that taught them nothing about what life really was. Some of them would never know…What makes you think that you do? What makes you so experienced?
He sighed and pushed away his unfinished breakfast. Picking up his bag, he followed the crowds out into the draughty hallway.
The bell sounded faintly overhead. Harry looked up and unfolded the note just passed to him by Ron. Ron seemed a little uneasy, and Harry realised why as he read the note from Florence. He grinned. Another sappy note that sent Ron into one of those jealous sulks, which he revelled in. Harry focussed on the note again, reading its contents slowly, letting a small smile flicker over his lips and knowing that Ron was watching every movement.
Harry folded the paper and put it away in his robe pocket. Catching Ron's eye, he told his friend to carry on without him.
Harry loved this. The way he felt needed- really wanted. And as always he pushed it a little further so that he could bask under the feeling.
He watched as Ron reluctantly left the classroom with everyone else, leaving only him and Florence.
Lovely Florence. Lively and funny and sweet. Harry put his arm around her and pulled her in for a kiss. Feeling of soft flesh on her upper arms, warm lips and warm eyes. Harry liked these things. Oh yes. But how could it substitute the missing something? Was it missing at all?
The bell sounded faintly overhead. Draco filed out with the other Slytherins and Hufflepuffs, but motioned for Crabbe and Goyle to carry on without him. He stood outside the door of the classroom taking in deliberately deep breaths.
Right.
This was it- what he'd been planning since the train journey back to school.
What would make Harry his? What would poison that pure soul and hurt that innocent heart?
Draco peered through the crack between the hinges of the door. Yes, there he was. Tall and gentle and gorgeous and brown eyes and brown curls. Undoubtedly the most beautiful, sought after pupil in school. Not for his looks alone, but for his glowing mild nature and sweet innocent charm.
Perfect.
But no-one had penetrated that shell, had they? Many had tried. He had a distance, invisible to those less sensitive. But Draco saw it- when Justin spoke to his fellow Hufflepuffs, when Justin was asked a question in class, when he was alone.
Draco had been captivated by Justin Finch-Fletchley, as the rest of the school was. Not exactly attracted, more… admiring of him. And he had a feeling that he knew more about Justin than many other people, but would this work? Or would it blow up in his face, causing a lot of embarrassment?
No. Draco thought of Harry and felt the anger rise- the need for possession. Draco had thought hard about what could draw Harry in? What could make him come to Draco? Then it had hit him. Draco only knew of two things that made him that passionate. Revenge and Jealousy. He had to try this at least.
Pushing open the door, Draco crept into the room and seated himself at a desk, watching Justin work.
He really was beautiful. So unsure of himself, so graceful.
Draco almost forgot why he was there. He was lost in wonder at this being before him. But then Justin felt the eyes on his back and turned from his job of cleaning the blackboard to face the pale boy. He looked a little taken back.
"Oh, hello Malfoy, what are you still here for?"
Draco simply smiled a slow seductive smile and rose from the desk.
Justin started to look a little uneasy.
"I know about you Finch-Fletchley."
"Oh? What do you know?" Justin looked scared. Draco liked the feeling of power.
This was it. Was Draco's theory correct?
"I know about you, and your loneliness, and your sexuality."
Draco stepped closer.
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"You're gay Fletchley, I'm sure you've realised." Draco drawled.
Justin looked completely shocked but terrified.
Draco breathed an internal sigh of relief. Good. This was going to plan.
"What do you want from me?"
"What do I want?"
"I know about you Malfoys." Justin attempted to take on a threatening air. "I know that you don't like homosexuality."
Draco smirked. How little Justin knew about what really went on behind stone walls.
Justin fumbled.
"I…There's nothing wrong with being gay."
Draco felt sad suddenly. What must they think of him. Of course there was nothing wrong with being gay. He was gay himself……..What! That was the first time he thought that surfaced into his consciousness. No. He didn't care what they thought of him. It was insignificant.
Draco turned his mind on the job at hand.
"I never said there was. But I know why you're here…"
Draco paused a moment to give Justin an intent gaze.
"You want something to sate your loneliness. You want something to fill that chasm in you, and you think that recognition will serve. You want to be remembered for something, and so you're here in this classroom day after day, hoping that dedication will make up for what you really are-A worthless Hufflepuff."
Draco spit the last word and saw the other boy flinch at his words. It felt like an achievement.
"I can sense your dream, Fletchley. I know that you are working towards being a prefect, then Head Boy, then the world?" He laughed hollowly, an alien sound in the peace of the room. "You don't want them to know, do you? If they were to find out what an irrelevant blemish you are, they will never let you be remembered."
Justin refused to meet with steely eyes, his side to Draco. He felt a cold hand on the nape of his neck.
"I see you Fletchley for what you are." These words came out in a husky whisper. Draco had been wrong. He *was* attracted to this elegance in front of him, or maybe it was the control that made him crazy.
Slowly, Justin raised his frightened eyes to look at Draco. How did he know? Justin thought that nobody could possibly know. Who would want to know?
Draco sensed a victory.
He dragged his hand across Justin's neck and along his cheekbone, making the other boy shiver slightly. His icy fingers slid down the front of his neck, over the bobbing apple and rested on his collar line, palm flat against smooth skin.
Justin swallowed reflexively.
"What do you want from me?" He managed to croak out for the second time.
"You." Draco whispered, and pushed the boy hard where his palm lay. Justin stumbled backwards, landing hard against the wall. Immediately, Justin felt cold lips press roughly over his. A hot tongue forcing open his mouth. A kiss that took him. All of him. Selfish and deep and strong. Breathless. Feeling. An eternity of spinning worlds and burning movement. A fiery sunset and beating wings across the pain.
He felt his knees give way and arms catch him as he fell.
Draco smiled to himself.
Tears beaded soft brown lashes. Draco seated the boy on the desk and stood back.
"You're pathetic."
Justin refused to look up, so Draco tilted his head harshly, forcing eye contact.
Quick as lightning, a sharp slap.
Tears started to trickle down. Draco just watched.
Then lent close, watching angry red marks spark to life. His tongue slid out of his mouth and at a leisurely pace, proceeded to lick up the trickles. Justin shivered again as Draco traced the pattern across his skin. Finally his mouth was brought again to swollen lips, and he kissed again. Soft and gracious this time. And so long it was timeless.
When he felt the other boy responding- pushing shyly against Draco's lips, he was elated. Accomplished. Draco let him try. Let his want grow, until he felt the warmth wet of tongue against his lips. Timid exploration.
Abruptly, Draco pulled away, and swept out of the room, leaving a shocked, tear-stained Hufflepuff, without even his cover-up dignity left.
Harry seated himself with a bounce, next to Ron at the Griffindor table.
"Where were you?" Ron demanded.
"With Florence." He replied innocently.
Ron faltered. It wasn't as if Harry was hiding anything. And Ron knew that they were the ones who were illegal- so to speak- but this was too much. He wasn't even trying to shield Ron from the gory details.
Hermione grinned cheekily. "Oh yeah? What were you two up to then?"
"Nothing much." Harry said, grinning also.
"Hmmm." Hermione scratched her chin. "I wonder what that one codes for."
Harry laughed and spooned out potatoes for them all. "Want gravy Ron?"
"Mmmm." Came the mumbled reply.
Hermione looked worried. "What's wrong?"
Harry grinned, knowing that Ron couldn't tell the truth. "Oh, nothing."
"Ok. Well that code doesn't fit."
"What does 'sigh, oh nothing' stand for?" Harry asked still grinning.
"It was meant to translate as, 'I'm secretly having an affair with my best friend, I'm jealous of his official relationship and I don't want to admit this to anyone, including the fact that I'm gay." The tone was dripping sarcasm.
Harry's and Ron's mouths were open in bewilderment.
"I may be your friends, but I'm not stupid or blind." She added without missing a beat.
"Why didn't you say anything?"
"Oh, It was just too entertaining to watch you two come out with your pitiable excuses for sneaking off together." She said, smirking.
Draco stalked down the empty corridor, stepping in and out of the shadows. He was waiting or an opportunity to break Justin more. It was such a thrill, his abuse instead of an abused. It was necessary in order to achieve what he wanted. It was simply a means to an end- it had reason. Right?
Draco recoiled at approaching footsteps.
Oh, it was just Longbottom.
Followed by…
Bostock, and Carrot.
God!
Draco moved to quieter parts and continued to wait.
Ron watched Harry flop lazily onto his bed.
"Harry?" He walked to Harry's side until he was towering over him.
"Yeah?"
"Is this a serious relationship?"
Harry lean up on his elbows. "Where did that come from?"
"I…I've been thinking. Our relationship isn't really going anywhere. And…"
"Ron, you know that I love you."
"Hmmm…but you're not *in* love with me, are you?"
Harry hesitated. He didn't know what to say to Ron without hurting him.
"I like things how they are."
Ron looked hurt. "Ok Harry." He turned away.
"Wait. Come here." Harry leant up and kissed Ron lightly on his lips.
Ron returned to his homework looking slightly happier and Harry rested his head on the pillow once more. Did he really like things as they were? No, he felt the barrenness of his soul before and knew still, that it couldn't be filled by this medley of half-lovers. And now the feeling had been awoken like a wound in a salty breeze.
He felt hollow. What had he done to his best friend? Why should his own pain be inflicted onto Ron? He should have left things to be, when Ron was happy and he was alone. But no. He had to have it. He had to take away Ron's happiness.
It wasn't intentional at first. And then he had realised that Ron loved him. Ron would do anything for him. Ron would break up the first love he had ever had, for Harry. It was a lust that survived on command. His command over others. He need to feel wanted- appreciated, for more than just 'the boy who lived'. They didn't know him really. Their worship for him was superficial and putrid. Harry wanted someone to step inside him and see him for what he was, just a boy. And Hermione had seen. And Ron had seen. And so had a few others. But it wasn't enough just to see; they needed to understand the loneliness and the self-pity.
It was so nice to know that Ron loved him. Ron, dear Ron. He had given up the most sought after boy in school, just to be with Harry. Stepping from one secret relationship into another. It was all laughable. One big cover-up, and for what? To keep people happy.
No. For protection essentially.
Outside, the corridors were dark now. In the forgotten colours of the night, the battle for recognition continued in the small souls of every pupil at Hogwarts.
A/N: Apparently my guest-appearance guest has decided to write himself into the plot, and now he is bound fast. Oops. Oh well.
Thanks for reviewing part III :)
~finite
Draco couldn't believe that he had actually missed this chaos while he had been back at his house. Now the noise seemed to throb around him, as though it was alive and impatient to live out the best it could. It was always the same in the morning; the echoing hall tried to dress down for the occasion, but the racket the students made as they shovelled in their breakfasts was a sufficient substitute for the lack of occasion. It was a fact however, that the larger the crowd around you, the more alone you were. In the midst of the chatter, Draco sat thinking about the last few days and what they had done for him.
He was certainly better in health for his little recuperation period, but what the time had really given him, was the chance to do a little research and a little thinking.
It had been awkward. Very Awkward.
He didn't really know how to look at his father after the scene he witnessed. But that didn't matter much, as after the trip home, Lucius disappeared into his study and Draco didn't see him again while he was home for the weekend.
He had always known that Snape had started Hogwarts when Lucius was in his 5th year.
That was why Snape favoured him of course…he *knew* Draco's father…why else?
But. But. This changed everything.
Lucius was gay- and Draco had had no idea. He thought of his mother. Did she know? Did she care? They didn't seem to love each other. They didn't seem to be even aware of each other, as if they were living in different worlds altogether. He had gone back to his house with these thoughts jumping around in his mind. His mother. His father. His teacher.
Snape had changed in Draco's eyes. It was hard to think of him in any way other than a teacher. He was almost an inanimate object incapable of feeling. It was the same with Lucius. Father. And yet he saw them together now. Why wasn't it obvious before? When had Lucius ever come to collect him?
At least some of the burning questions had been answered now. His house was filled with its own history, which it sometimes yearned to tell and sometimes guarded possessively. This secret past of unfaithful men was blurted out to him as soon as he asked. The walls whispered and pulled him along until he found everything. Every detail about that story. Every unloved wife, every craving husband. Lucius' father had been abusive and abused and his father and his father- a long line of unhappiness and masked truth. A book of dark past, vengeful still to haunt Draco. And for the first time, he understood the misery that beat within the house. Each crack and corner sucking in the depression.
A foul wind.
But was Draco brave enough to fight it?
With history over him, would his will power be enough to free him?
At least the tale also spoke of homosexuals within the family. It was there but hidden by the want of tradition and 'wholesomeness'. Disgusting to hide. At least it was accepted within the stone walls. But Draco- he could feel the past in his blood; the pulse of revenge and need for satisfaction.
Oh, Draco hated this. Draco hated Harry and the way Harry made him needy. He hated being what he was and being attracted to the boy. But he would have it. It was a material thing. And so Draco would have it. Denial out of the question, Harry would succumb.
A clatter of chairs brought him back to the present. The hall was emptying; pupils hurrying to get to their lessons. Lessons that taught them nothing about what life really was. Some of them would never know…What makes you think that you do? What makes you so experienced?
He sighed and pushed away his unfinished breakfast. Picking up his bag, he followed the crowds out into the draughty hallway.
The bell sounded faintly overhead. Harry looked up and unfolded the note just passed to him by Ron. Ron seemed a little uneasy, and Harry realised why as he read the note from Florence. He grinned. Another sappy note that sent Ron into one of those jealous sulks, which he revelled in. Harry focussed on the note again, reading its contents slowly, letting a small smile flicker over his lips and knowing that Ron was watching every movement.
Harry folded the paper and put it away in his robe pocket. Catching Ron's eye, he told his friend to carry on without him.
Harry loved this. The way he felt needed- really wanted. And as always he pushed it a little further so that he could bask under the feeling.
He watched as Ron reluctantly left the classroom with everyone else, leaving only him and Florence.
Lovely Florence. Lively and funny and sweet. Harry put his arm around her and pulled her in for a kiss. Feeling of soft flesh on her upper arms, warm lips and warm eyes. Harry liked these things. Oh yes. But how could it substitute the missing something? Was it missing at all?
The bell sounded faintly overhead. Draco filed out with the other Slytherins and Hufflepuffs, but motioned for Crabbe and Goyle to carry on without him. He stood outside the door of the classroom taking in deliberately deep breaths.
Right.
This was it- what he'd been planning since the train journey back to school.
What would make Harry his? What would poison that pure soul and hurt that innocent heart?
Draco peered through the crack between the hinges of the door. Yes, there he was. Tall and gentle and gorgeous and brown eyes and brown curls. Undoubtedly the most beautiful, sought after pupil in school. Not for his looks alone, but for his glowing mild nature and sweet innocent charm.
Perfect.
But no-one had penetrated that shell, had they? Many had tried. He had a distance, invisible to those less sensitive. But Draco saw it- when Justin spoke to his fellow Hufflepuffs, when Justin was asked a question in class, when he was alone.
Draco had been captivated by Justin Finch-Fletchley, as the rest of the school was. Not exactly attracted, more… admiring of him. And he had a feeling that he knew more about Justin than many other people, but would this work? Or would it blow up in his face, causing a lot of embarrassment?
No. Draco thought of Harry and felt the anger rise- the need for possession. Draco had thought hard about what could draw Harry in? What could make him come to Draco? Then it had hit him. Draco only knew of two things that made him that passionate. Revenge and Jealousy. He had to try this at least.
Pushing open the door, Draco crept into the room and seated himself at a desk, watching Justin work.
He really was beautiful. So unsure of himself, so graceful.
Draco almost forgot why he was there. He was lost in wonder at this being before him. But then Justin felt the eyes on his back and turned from his job of cleaning the blackboard to face the pale boy. He looked a little taken back.
"Oh, hello Malfoy, what are you still here for?"
Draco simply smiled a slow seductive smile and rose from the desk.
Justin started to look a little uneasy.
"I know about you Finch-Fletchley."
"Oh? What do you know?" Justin looked scared. Draco liked the feeling of power.
This was it. Was Draco's theory correct?
"I know about you, and your loneliness, and your sexuality."
Draco stepped closer.
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"You're gay Fletchley, I'm sure you've realised." Draco drawled.
Justin looked completely shocked but terrified.
Draco breathed an internal sigh of relief. Good. This was going to plan.
"What do you want from me?"
"What do I want?"
"I know about you Malfoys." Justin attempted to take on a threatening air. "I know that you don't like homosexuality."
Draco smirked. How little Justin knew about what really went on behind stone walls.
Justin fumbled.
"I…There's nothing wrong with being gay."
Draco felt sad suddenly. What must they think of him. Of course there was nothing wrong with being gay. He was gay himself……..What! That was the first time he thought that surfaced into his consciousness. No. He didn't care what they thought of him. It was insignificant.
Draco turned his mind on the job at hand.
"I never said there was. But I know why you're here…"
Draco paused a moment to give Justin an intent gaze.
"You want something to sate your loneliness. You want something to fill that chasm in you, and you think that recognition will serve. You want to be remembered for something, and so you're here in this classroom day after day, hoping that dedication will make up for what you really are-A worthless Hufflepuff."
Draco spit the last word and saw the other boy flinch at his words. It felt like an achievement.
"I can sense your dream, Fletchley. I know that you are working towards being a prefect, then Head Boy, then the world?" He laughed hollowly, an alien sound in the peace of the room. "You don't want them to know, do you? If they were to find out what an irrelevant blemish you are, they will never let you be remembered."
Justin refused to meet with steely eyes, his side to Draco. He felt a cold hand on the nape of his neck.
"I see you Fletchley for what you are." These words came out in a husky whisper. Draco had been wrong. He *was* attracted to this elegance in front of him, or maybe it was the control that made him crazy.
Slowly, Justin raised his frightened eyes to look at Draco. How did he know? Justin thought that nobody could possibly know. Who would want to know?
Draco sensed a victory.
He dragged his hand across Justin's neck and along his cheekbone, making the other boy shiver slightly. His icy fingers slid down the front of his neck, over the bobbing apple and rested on his collar line, palm flat against smooth skin.
Justin swallowed reflexively.
"What do you want from me?" He managed to croak out for the second time.
"You." Draco whispered, and pushed the boy hard where his palm lay. Justin stumbled backwards, landing hard against the wall. Immediately, Justin felt cold lips press roughly over his. A hot tongue forcing open his mouth. A kiss that took him. All of him. Selfish and deep and strong. Breathless. Feeling. An eternity of spinning worlds and burning movement. A fiery sunset and beating wings across the pain.
He felt his knees give way and arms catch him as he fell.
Draco smiled to himself.
Tears beaded soft brown lashes. Draco seated the boy on the desk and stood back.
"You're pathetic."
Justin refused to look up, so Draco tilted his head harshly, forcing eye contact.
Quick as lightning, a sharp slap.
Tears started to trickle down. Draco just watched.
Then lent close, watching angry red marks spark to life. His tongue slid out of his mouth and at a leisurely pace, proceeded to lick up the trickles. Justin shivered again as Draco traced the pattern across his skin. Finally his mouth was brought again to swollen lips, and he kissed again. Soft and gracious this time. And so long it was timeless.
When he felt the other boy responding- pushing shyly against Draco's lips, he was elated. Accomplished. Draco let him try. Let his want grow, until he felt the warmth wet of tongue against his lips. Timid exploration.
Abruptly, Draco pulled away, and swept out of the room, leaving a shocked, tear-stained Hufflepuff, without even his cover-up dignity left.
Harry seated himself with a bounce, next to Ron at the Griffindor table.
"Where were you?" Ron demanded.
"With Florence." He replied innocently.
Ron faltered. It wasn't as if Harry was hiding anything. And Ron knew that they were the ones who were illegal- so to speak- but this was too much. He wasn't even trying to shield Ron from the gory details.
Hermione grinned cheekily. "Oh yeah? What were you two up to then?"
"Nothing much." Harry said, grinning also.
"Hmmm." Hermione scratched her chin. "I wonder what that one codes for."
Harry laughed and spooned out potatoes for them all. "Want gravy Ron?"
"Mmmm." Came the mumbled reply.
Hermione looked worried. "What's wrong?"
Harry grinned, knowing that Ron couldn't tell the truth. "Oh, nothing."
"Ok. Well that code doesn't fit."
"What does 'sigh, oh nothing' stand for?" Harry asked still grinning.
"It was meant to translate as, 'I'm secretly having an affair with my best friend, I'm jealous of his official relationship and I don't want to admit this to anyone, including the fact that I'm gay." The tone was dripping sarcasm.
Harry's and Ron's mouths were open in bewilderment.
"I may be your friends, but I'm not stupid or blind." She added without missing a beat.
"Why didn't you say anything?"
"Oh, It was just too entertaining to watch you two come out with your pitiable excuses for sneaking off together." She said, smirking.
Draco stalked down the empty corridor, stepping in and out of the shadows. He was waiting or an opportunity to break Justin more. It was such a thrill, his abuse instead of an abused. It was necessary in order to achieve what he wanted. It was simply a means to an end- it had reason. Right?
Draco recoiled at approaching footsteps.
Oh, it was just Longbottom.
Followed by…
Bostock, and Carrot.
God!
Draco moved to quieter parts and continued to wait.
Ron watched Harry flop lazily onto his bed.
"Harry?" He walked to Harry's side until he was towering over him.
"Yeah?"
"Is this a serious relationship?"
Harry lean up on his elbows. "Where did that come from?"
"I…I've been thinking. Our relationship isn't really going anywhere. And…"
"Ron, you know that I love you."
"Hmmm…but you're not *in* love with me, are you?"
Harry hesitated. He didn't know what to say to Ron without hurting him.
"I like things how they are."
Ron looked hurt. "Ok Harry." He turned away.
"Wait. Come here." Harry leant up and kissed Ron lightly on his lips.
Ron returned to his homework looking slightly happier and Harry rested his head on the pillow once more. Did he really like things as they were? No, he felt the barrenness of his soul before and knew still, that it couldn't be filled by this medley of half-lovers. And now the feeling had been awoken like a wound in a salty breeze.
He felt hollow. What had he done to his best friend? Why should his own pain be inflicted onto Ron? He should have left things to be, when Ron was happy and he was alone. But no. He had to have it. He had to take away Ron's happiness.
It wasn't intentional at first. And then he had realised that Ron loved him. Ron would do anything for him. Ron would break up the first love he had ever had, for Harry. It was a lust that survived on command. His command over others. He need to feel wanted- appreciated, for more than just 'the boy who lived'. They didn't know him really. Their worship for him was superficial and putrid. Harry wanted someone to step inside him and see him for what he was, just a boy. And Hermione had seen. And Ron had seen. And so had a few others. But it wasn't enough just to see; they needed to understand the loneliness and the self-pity.
It was so nice to know that Ron loved him. Ron, dear Ron. He had given up the most sought after boy in school, just to be with Harry. Stepping from one secret relationship into another. It was all laughable. One big cover-up, and for what? To keep people happy.
No. For protection essentially.
Outside, the corridors were dark now. In the forgotten colours of the night, the battle for recognition continued in the small souls of every pupil at Hogwarts.
A/N: Apparently my guest-appearance guest has decided to write himself into the plot, and now he is bound fast. Oops. Oh well.
Thanks for reviewing part III :)
~finite
