Deep
Within
By Jen
People
never tell you
How really true you feel
I would die for you gladly
If I knew what loss for me
So if all this talk sounds crazy
And the words don't come out right
Doesn't really matter
If it gets me through this night
-I Will Love Again Lara
Fabian
Chapter 9- Signs of Healing:
'Her wounds are finally beginning to heal'
"Mei?" Mei looked up from
her luggage. "Hai, Misao?"
"Where are you going?"
Misao walked over to her and began to help Mei pack her bags.
"…" Mei contemplated on
telling Misao where she was going.
"Mei?"
"Kyoto." Mei looked at
Misao closely, to see any signs of emotions. She saw a flash of pain before
Misao's eyes became indifferent again.
"Kyoto…?"
"Hai. To get some things."
"Nani? Why?"
"I'm moving to Tokyo."
"Nani?! Why?"
"Misao…"
"It's because of me, ne?
Mei, I don't want you to leave Kyoto just because of me. You have a life
there. Don't leave because of me."
"Daijobou, Misao. Daijobou.
I'm moving here because I want to. Plus, Megumi-sensei would become a good
mentor in my medical studies."
"Mei…"
"I've made up my mind
Misao-chan. You know just as well as I do that you and me are two most stubborn
people on earth."
Misao's lips twitched
slightly, but she kept her stoic expression. Mei inwardly sighed. She was going
to have to talk to Aoshi.
"Good. Now try it again
this time relax your posture a little… yes like that. Try it again. Yes!
That's good. Do that ten more times."
Mei watched as Misao taught
Yu a new kick. Three months passed by and Misao still had not changed. Still her
emotionless self, but Mei could see Yu's admiration of his mentor.
"Mei?"
"Misao. I just wanted to
say goodbye before I leave. I'll be back in two weeks."
"Alright.
Sayonara Mei."
Yu who had finished his
exercises came over to Mei to wish her farewell. "Sayonara Mei-sensei."
Mei smiled at the boy.
"Goodbye Yu-kun."
She hugged Misao and wished
the others goodbye before she left with Sa to travel to Kyoto.
"Misao-senpai?" Misao
looked up at Yu's hesitant voice. "Yu-kun?"
"…ano… can you help me
with that combo you showed me yesterday? I'm having trouble with it…"
"Hai, show me." Misao put
down her journal and watched Yu perform the combo. She stopped him after a
while.
"Instead of using the same
hand right here, try to punch with the other one until you get used to this.
When you've got that down, I'll help you learn this way. Try again and
relax."
"Hai."
Yu launched himself into the
moves, allowing himself to relax and the movements came easier. "Arigatou
Misao-senpai."
"Your welcome. Has Sano
been teaching you anything new?"
"Hai. He showed me
something today."
"Show me."
Yu began to move again as he
went through the technique Sano had showed him not too long ago. Misao watched
him and he awaited her critique.
"You are doing wonderfully,
Yu-kun. You are lucky to have Sano as a teacher."
"Iie. I'm lucky to have
you as a teacher to Misao-senpai."
Misao was surprised and
touched at the boy's outburst. "Yu-kun…arigatou."
Misao hugged the young boy
before she left to help Kaoru prepare dinner. Mei was supposed to come back
tonight, and they were going to have a nice big dinner.
"Minna! I'm home!"
Mei's voice rang throughout the yard. "Mei!"
"Misao!" The two met in a
huge embrace.
Kaoru came out of the dojo
smiling. "Mei-chan! How was your trip?"
Mei's smile disappeared and
reappeared. "It was great in some ways and fine in others."
"Nani?" Misao was
confused. "What are you talking about Mei?"
"Nothing. Let's get
inside, ne?"
"Where's Sa-san? Did he
have to go?"
"Hai, but says he'll come
by for a visit tomorrow."
"That would be nice."
"Mei?" Kaoru closed the
door to Mei's room after she entered.
"Kaoru-san?" Mei looked
up surprised.
"Daijobou? When you came
back, you didn't look well."
"I'm fine… just a
little tired."
"Did you talk to him?"
"Hai, demo… he still
hasn't changed. He still can't see how much he really loves her."
"Mei… we're not sure if
he really loves her though…"
"Of course he does! You
should have seen him after Misao had tried to kill herself. And when she
disappeared…he has to love her… he has too…"
"…" Kaoru tried her
best to comfort Mei. This was beginning to be too hard on all of them. "We
can't change him. The only thing we can do is help Misao-chan forget and move
on."
"We've tried already
Kaoru. We tried everything."
"Then maybe we should let
Misao do this herself. Help her when she asks us to…
Their voices faded as they
lost themselves in their own thoughts.
Outside Misao stood close by
listening to their conversation until their voices faded away. Instead of going
back to her room, Misao walked into the garden to sit on the bench. She made a
silent vow to herself and her friends. I'm going to move on. I won't
worry them anymore.
"Misao-neesan!" Asuko ran
towards Misao's back. Misao turned just in time to catch the laughing toddler.
A smile appearing on her lips, her gaze soft and tender. No longer was the
iciness within her. It had disappeared and was replaced by the warmth that she
had lost.
"Hai, Su-chan?"
"Let's go play a game.
Onegai? Onegai?" Misao looked at Asuko's wide hopeful eyes and sighed.
"Gomen. I can't play
right this moment, but if you wait until I finish sweeping the dojo, I'll play
any game you want." Asuko smiled wider. "HAI!" Misao put Asuko down and
continued to sweep. Asuko watched Misao sweep. Misao-neesan was important to
her. Asuko loved her almost as much as her okaasan. Asuko thought Misao to be
really generous and beautiful. It had been six months since her Misao-neesan
had come to live with them. Asuko had grown fond of her, following her around.
Misao smiled. It had been
three months and she was beginning a new and better life. One that required no
violence and no heartache. Mei had stayed with her at the dojo. The two of them
help take care of the dojo and Asuko. Yu had begun to master the arts of kenpou
under her careful instructions. I've
settled in. This is what it's like to lead a normal life. So peaceful. My
heart isn't aching anymore. I can just bury those feelings and forget them.
"This is the beginning."
"Nee-san?" Asuko was
waiting impatiently for Misao.
"Ah! Gomen. Gomen! I'm
almost done little Su-chan."
"There. All done. Time to
play Su-chan!"
"Hai!" Misao held the
small girl in her arms in a quick embrace before she put Asuko down. She laughed
as Asuko tugged on her arm leading them to a playing spot.
Kaoru looked up when she
heard Misao's laughter. She smiled happily.
"She's healing." Kaoru
smiled at Mei.
"Hai. She is. I'm so
glad. It does not suit her to be so cold and unfeeling." Mei and Kaoru watched
as Misao ran after Asuko trying to catch the laughing toddler.
Misao stopped chasing Asuko
for a moment and whistled. Shin swooped down and landed on her shoulder. "Ne,
Su-chan? Come here."
Asuko ran to Misao and
clapped excitedly when she saw Shin. "Su-chan, this is Shin."
"CAN I pet him?"
"Hai." Misao placed Shin
on Asuko's shoulder. She laughed and petted Shin. Misao watched her fondly.
She let out a wistful sigh. She felt the familiar longing in her heart. She was
eighteen, close to nineteen. She should have been married by now, and raising a
family of her own. But she needed to be in love. She refused to go into a
loveless marriage. But I only love…stop
it. She scolded herself. Time will help me forget. She smiled and her eyes
took on a mischievous glint. "Su-chan, weren't we in the middle of
something?"
Asuko nodded and laughed. She
ran off leaving Misao to chase her.
Misao was amused by Asuko's
antics. She reminds me of me. She
mused. Voices echoed in her mind.
'Eiji-niichan! You can't catch me!'
'Aa.
But I can… got ya!'
'Oniichan!
Stop tickling me!'
'But
I like to see my little Mi-chan smile.'
'Don't
worry. I'll always smile for Eiji-niichan. Always and forever.'
Misao smiled at the memory
and caught Asuko up in her arms. Asuko tried to wiggle free, but Misao's grip
was strong. Misao placed Asuko on the ground and began to tickle her. I'll
always smile for Eiji-niichan. Always and forever. Asuko shrieked with
laughter and tried to tickle her oneesan back. So they sat there tickling each
other and laughing. Kaoru watched them fondly. Thank
goodness. She's back.
Author's Notes: Boring boring. These chapters are very boring. Well let's call it the calm before the storm type thing… Remember to do the usual thing. ^_~
