An interpretation and personal follow-up of Martyrdom by Miss-Ecchi, and a 'thank-you' for inspiring me to write. Thank you. Read Martyrdom here:
s/12907404/1/Martyrdom
martyrdom
ˈmɑːtədəm/
noun
the death or suffering of a martyr.
"the martyrdom of St Anthony"
synonyms: death, suffering, torture, torment, agony, persecution, ordeal, anguish; etc
victory
…
?
Victory. Reaping the rewards of one's tribulations, finally conquering one's demons, becoming greater than who one was prior. Arriving at the light at the end of the tunnel; the sensation that comes with reaching a major goal is unparalleled. Such is a nigh-ethereal satisfaction, an otherwordly boost of morale that brings seemingly perfect ease to the soul. To know that one has won is a moment of true greatness.
A moment of true greatness. A moment that is ultimately destined to pass, sooner or later.
Victory over any scenario may allow one to advance to another scenario, but that too requires new victories to be made, leading to an endless cycle in which one begs the question; what is true, permanent victory? Does something so precious, so desirable exist? Can one attain something so grand? Can one even imagine, even fathom something with such beauty? When is true victory, true success reached?
5 years. 1825 days. With all the surrounding noise, time passes in a rush, and only in these moments of silence can one properly reflect on that what has all transpired. All the pain, the hurt, the tribulations, the trials, but also the improvement, the inspiring moments, the hope; these moments of quiet can give those lacking in faith an opportunity to fathom all that has been done, and what continues to be done. Resting on this spot, a place reflective on its own of the world's developments, it's more than fitting to realize these things here. Where it all began.
6 years ago, 2190 days ago, nothing but a desolate wasteland. All the green, all the life, all malnourished and crushed beneath an iron boot. And while so much was an illusion, the fear was real, and the resulting devastation even more so. But the destructive void left behind was soon filled, as all the combined vigilance inspired growth. The great healing, a worldwide system of support and care for each other, a time allowing for true progress after all the harshness. Still present, still ongoing.
He recalls all these things clearly. All these memories, no matter how old, how seemingly insignificant, remain deeply imprinted in his mind. For better or for worse, there is no way for him to escape the past. Dreams, sounds, smells, all things to cause him to relieve an occurrence from the past. And despite all the regretful moments, he firmly believes that the life he has led, the life he is pursuing, and the life he wishes to achieve, are not anything he regrets entirely. Far from it, even. After all, through his ambition, the ruins left behind after the war have been fixed, renewed. Through these combined efforts with those closest to him, the world could experience a fresh start, a new beginning, a new chance. Creating this brand new world in addition to getting rid of the threats of old for good, is a memory remarkably beautiful beyond compare. And even during those times, memories of a past even further back have given him the tools necessary to start anew.
8 years ago. 2922 days ago. Destruction, as far as the eye could see. The cities overflooded, the streets in ruins, the skyscrapers devastated, households divided, families lost, hope lost. They were just kids back then. Children having faced a truly monstrous threat, a threat not encountered in centuries. And though the victory lay in the battle, the death left behind was still present. Irreparable damage had been done, and true victory in a situation like that seemed unimaginable. Nevertheless, neither did they stop either. The fight was over, but the healing had just begun. From the rubble, the remnants of the buildings wrecked, they helped those left behind, those still clinging to life, those unable to escape. Though his speed allowed him to traverse from one spot to another with ease, that alone wouldn't have sufficed in removing the tremors with care and tending to each and everyone on time. It was a combined effort, it was possible with the help of the others. The help offered by them all was significant, but none did he rather work with than the one friend he had shared countless of journeys with already.
As the day was nearing an end, their energy exhausted, official help arriving at the scene, the two reclined at a lone spot, on the rooftops of a sinking building. Stargazing at the cleared sky, immersing themselves at the moment, he would soon break the silence with a comment:
"...don't wanna brag, but I carried about 3,400 away…"
Chuckling at his remark, the other responded, a smug grin forming on his face:
"Half of those you found only because of me, so that alone gives me plenty of bonus points."
An ironic laugh escapes his mouth before his tone shifts, as he takes a deep breath and utters:
"Man… How long have we been doing this? I'm sure it's been a few years already, but it really doesn't feel like it at all. Time flies when you're having fun, I guess. Well, 'fun' may not be the right word for this but… y'know what I mean, right?"
Sighing, the other answers, his fuzzy tails wrapped around himself:
"Yeah… I feel you… But… Well… Eh, nevermind…"
His gaze shifting to his friend, he inquires in a concerned tone:
"Yo… What's up? C'mon, you can tell me everything, remember?"
Though somewhat hesitant and taking a moment, the orange fox cannot deny his friend's genuine interest in him, and thus answers:
"It's just… You know, you are… You are who you are. You're a real hero, Sonic! People love you now, people admire you now. And you're strong, you're fearless, you're so cool, and… Well, you're kinda perfect, almost. And you always have my back too. And I really love hanging out with you, kicking the butt of bad guys, and saving the day… But I feel like… You are so much more. I'm too reliant on you, I wouldn't be anyone if it weren't for you. You're the Sonic, and I'm… I'm his little buddy who needs constant saving. I just… I sometimes think I don't deserve to be with you, I sometimes think I don't deserve to be friends with someone so cool like you…"
"Tails… I… I didn't know you felt that way…"
"It's… whatever. Just forget about it."
Silence ensues once more, with Tails staring off into nothingness, his back almost turned to Sonic. Biting his lower lip, the blue hedgehog thinks for a moment, his mind reflecting on those words until he finally knows. Moving up closer to the child genius, Sonic playfully bumps his shoulder and states:
"Hey, dude… You're pretty cool too, y'know?"
Shrugging it off, Tails answers in a dismissive tone:
"You're just saying that to lighten the mood…"
Moving closer to him, the two now shoulder to shoulder, Sonic elaborates:
"Hey… When we split off a few days ago, and I heard how you faced that snot brain all by yourself… Man, I was impressed. I still am! You took him on all by yourself. And I will admit that he can be pretty tough, and that thing he used on you was no joke! You took him on all alone, and you whooped his behind! That's not something you can overlook so easily, Tails. And of course, your flying, how you upgraded the Tornado… It's crazy, dude! I could teach you how to fight, how to fly, how to be faster… But you took off. You're now at a level that I can't teach you much anymore. You've grown so much in such a short time, dude. And you're only getting better."
In a far more serious tone, he adds:
"It's not about whether you're cooler, it's about who you are becoming. You're doing your own thing, buddy. Keep at it. You're one sick fella now, and I can't wait to see how you're gonna turn out. And I mean this, Tails. You're my best friend for a reason. There's no one I'd rather have my back than you. And I'll always have your back too. We're both unstoppable, and I couldn't do half of what I do without you."
Slowly lifting his head to face Sonic, Tails looks at him with a subtle grin and asks in a brighter tone:
"...for real?"
Shooting him that bright, contagious smile, the hedgehog bluntly answers:
"For real."
As Sonic balls his hand into a fist, the two fist bump before going back to staring at the blissful stars, indulging in this rare and exquisite sight. Changing the topic, Tails comments:
"So… What now? The survivors are safe now, but this mess… What's going to happen now? What are we going to do?"
Pondering over this question, Sonic takes a generous amount of time. The question, simple, but complicated all at once. Where does one continue after something this major, this unfathomably catastrophic? Can one continue after something this tragic? The answer seems impossible to find, perhaps it doesn't even exist. Yet, after a moment, there's a revelation. It's right there, up in the sky, with the cosmic constellations up above, whose lights still shine, in the black void that persists forevermore. In short, Sonic finally utters:
"What we always do, Tails. We're gonna save the day, and make a few people smile. Our work doesn't stop now. No, it's gonna intensify. But that's what we're gonna do. We're gonna do what we always do. Despite all of this. Especially because of this."
And just as it was said and done back then, so is the same today. While the destruction and tragedy from then were severe, the experience gathered from that did not go to waste, as its application has become vital in this new world. And though the severity of the situation was unprecedented, the Restoration ran smoothly, allowing systems to be established again with proper leadership. The skills and capabilities of this competent leadership were shown before already, though. During the struggle, the battles, the war, the Resistance stood their ground despite the overwhelming force of evil. He couldn't fathom it back then and still can't properly imagine how they managed to fight back for so long, even despite his absence and the otherworldly trickery that was involved. Ultimately, it all traces back to the proper leadership. Unfazed, immovable, indestructible, calculated, inspiring leadership displayed by someone rather unexpected.
2 years ago. 730 days ago. There's still plenty of healing to do, still work that must be done, but the load has gotten significantly easier to bear. In fact, when compared to the situation just a few years prior, one can even make the argument that it has gotten easy. Systems have been set in stone, and with the passing of the doctor and the reprogramming of his robotic empire, it's as if the world is in a far better place than ever before. There's peace, tranquility, a feeling of true victory filling the air. All thanks to those who have stepped up. But, now, some believe it to be better to step down. Such is the case now again. As the two main leaders, the faces of hope, the embodiment of heroism, watch the horizon from the ruins above the ethereal clouds, he doesn't wait another minute to initiate the matter.
"So… Heard you are stepping down. Like, full-blown retirement. You're going back to… being here, and here only."
In a low yet serious tone, the other takes a deep breath before responding firmly:
"So you have heard. The reports may be an exaggeration of the facts, but I am indeed stepping away from the life outside and dedicating myself entirely to my duty here. It is here where I shall be for the remainder of my days, and where I will finally die in peace."
Letting out a sigh, Sonic questions with a hint of aggression in his tone:
"Now, of all times? C'mon now, we're at the top. People everywhere are looking up to us, y'know. I thought you finally let go of this… outdated, archaic 'duty' of yours! Can't you just, I don't know, make the Emerald accessible to all AND remain here? Why do you need to go that extra step of shutting off the outside world entirely? I mean, are you TRYING to outdo everything we worked for so hard? Are you really going to throw it all away for a twisted culture that's dead? Huh?"
A moment of tense silence ensues, with Sonic staring intensely at the other, whilst not receiving the same attention. Angered by the other's seemingly dismissive attitude, the hedgehog briefly yet firmly tugs at his shoulder, attempting to garner some kind of emotional response from him. And, as anticipated, it does. His deep, purple eyes pierce into the hedgehog's soul, his tone sharpens as he retorts:
"Quit throwing me into the mix. Or, specifically, quit throwing yourself into what I have created. You were merely the poster-boy, an idol people could believe in, something comparable to a mascot of my cause, my ideals. You claim all the credit for yourself, and now the world is steering in a direction I dread. And it's out of my control now. It is up to you to deal with. You're on your own. No one who really knows you is interested in working with you anymore. You're on your own, all alone."
Taken aback by his response, Sonic steps back, a pained expression on his face. His friendships, his former friendships, have been strained beyond repair, a deep-rooted insecurity festering within the hedgehog's soul. For it to be mentioned in such a way deeply disturbs him, and though the emotional pain develops into sadness, it soon shifts into a heated passion. A passionate burst of anger, a rage. Walking up close to the red echidna, Sonic snarls at his face:
"Shut up. Shut your mouth…! You're just another traitor. Someone else to abandon me, once again. All of you, traitors, backstabbers… You left me alone, you always leave me behind…It is you who left me alone to rot in that cell, to be tortured, abused… You abused me… You let that happen… You held me for dead! Dead! If I had known back then how everyone around me would abandon me one day, then I'd been better off dead! Traitor!"
Truly appalled by Sonic's behavior, Knuckles sharpens his gaze, his hands balled into fists. In a growly tone, the echidna snaps:
"You betrayed yourself. That is the greatest betrayal in this situation. You ruined yourself. You killed yourself. You refused any help, you actively went against anyone's advice, you hurt those around you, you hurt the only ones who could've saved you. You hurt Shadow, you hurt Silver, you hurt Blaze…"
Taking a step back, Sonic's eyes become watery, his voice shaky, his stance lacking the confidence it had prior. His gaze shifts throughout the area, aimlessly, as he walks around, aimlessly, screaming, aimlessly:
"Stop… Stop… Stop… Stop!"
Knuckles doesn't stop.
"You hurt Cream! You hurt Tails! You hurt me! But out of everyone, out of all of them, do you know who you hurt the most? I think you do. But I don't think you want to admit it. Then let me do it for you. Do you know who you hurt the most?"
A single tear runs down the hedgehog's cheek, before another follows, until it descends into a stream. His heart pumps at unparalleled speeds, his pulse running out of control, a wide array of emotions overwhelming his mind, seemingly endless adrenaline rushing through his veins. Struggling to form a single coherent word, with all his strength he only musters to faintly utter:
"...enough… please…"
Without remorse, Knuckles' tone bearing no signs of mercy, he continues:
"You shattered her heart, you tortured her soul, you abused her mind, you violated her spirit, you spat in her face, you defiled her body! You put her through such intense torment. But she kept going. She kept going for you. She was always there for you. But even she had her limits. You pushed her to those limits. You killed the only family you had. You killed…!"
Black. A black void consumes all, as Sonic hurls himself at Knuckles, grabbing his fists, and so, the black void consumes.
Victory. There's always victory in a situation. No matter what, there's always a victory. The only thing that changes is the victor. One side always wins. There's always a side victorious. But if one hurts the one they love the most, who is the true victor there? For both become the victims, one the victim to another's brutality, the other the victim to one's self. But there is another. The third. The one who takes delight in such things, the one to rejoice to see both lose. There's always the one desiring to harm, longing for all to hurt, and when such occurs, they become the victor, for they attain what they desire. There's always victory in a situation, but never for everyone. Victory.
6 years ago, 2190 days ago. Victory over his soul. He still vividly recalls that memory. That haunting nightmare that has changed everything, that curses him up to this day. 182 days, hurt, pain, death of himself. Something else emerged entirely, what was good of him perished, replaced by something vile. Trapped, death encircled him. Day one of the war, and already lost to the devilish illusionist.
Week one set the scene, waking up in that hollow cell, the cuffs stinging his wrists, and the beatdown sustained by that red monster. If only had he known then that so much of it wasn't real, but just mere illusions. But, how much would that knowledge have really impacted the situation? Though only that what he saw was fake, the feelings, the pain, the hurt, all of it was still real. All of it, so convincing, that even with that knowledge, differentiating between reality and the illusions would've been impossible; it all would have blended eventually. The orchestrator of this nightmare welcomed him too, cackling at the hedgehog's pathetic position, ecstatically awaiting to carry out the program prepared for the blue hero. The inception of the terror to follow.
Week two the first act of humiliation, the first significant attack on his self. The first major nightmare, his fight against Eggman's forces all over again. Had he ever been caught? Was that just another meaningless nightmare in itself? That didn't matter, as he ran, ran to fight the enemy, ran to save lives once more; like any other day, like any other of his numerous past adventures. With the sudden appearance of his longtime android counterpart, however, it swiftly spiraled out of control. Though Metal Sonic has always been one of the more formidable foes, he was never unbeatable either. Thus, viewing this as another mere rematch, he leaped up to him, eager to trash him once more. But the occurrence soon after, the twist of this nightmare, is what truly shaped this scenario. Landing on the floor, Sonic saw the most horrid sight; his legs, gone. His ultimate source of freedom, power, what provided him with the sensation of speed, what satiated his adrenaline-filled lust, was gone, separated from his body. Awaking from that hellish scenario, Sonic then realized that whatever Infinite had prepared for him was something he truly had never experienced before, a horror not even the mad doctor could ever come up with. He felt closer to death than ever before. Closer to hell. Proximation.
Week three, free again. The streets clear, the cities stable, the world normal again. It's as if the past events had never happened. But they did. But they certainly couldn't have. The jumps from the illusions to reality were beginning to blend in, it all became a blur. What truly was real, if it all felt real anyway. But Infinite's hand in the game soon revealed itself, the abnormal scenes appeared before Sonic once again, the jackal's signature. But it felt so real. It was real. It wasn't real. All of them. Staring at Sonic. Blank stares, an army of people as if controlled by a hive mind, women and children mostly. He halted, taken aback by this bizarre sight. Their shouts at him, their judging of him, it's as if he has done something truly hideous. But before he could question it further, the city became cracked, water has overflown throughout, an aquatic tentacle forcefully grabbing him. It was like the destruction 8 years ago all over again. It felt like it happened again. No, it felt like he was there again. As if the clock was turned back. As the water was pulling him back, all the people encircled him. Their pale faces haunted him. They weren't the ones he had saved with Tails. They weren't the survivors. He would have recognized them immediately. They were something else entirely. The testament of what Sonic couldn't save. That, for which he had secretly blamed himself for some time now. They were back, alive again, to judge him for not being good enough. For not saving enough. Five hundred and forty-one. Five hundred and twenty-seven. Seven hundred and ninety-nine. He would rather not list the order of what those numbers represented, but those numbers will forever remain in his mind. Stuck, festering in his soul. And as he awoke, he was reminded of the grim reality once more. That he was there to remain, for the program had just begun. It was just the third week, the third step. Tertiary.
Weeks followed. New methods to torture him further, new methods to push him further, new attempts to break him. Each outdid the previous one, with Sonic dreading the next day, fearing what Infinite's twisted creativity had planned out for him. Detonation. Laceration. Tribulation. Compensation. Death encircled him, pain sustained him. But those were only nightmares, only affecting him, only directed toward him, made for him only. But Infinite wouldn't quit there. The jackal sought to outdo himself properly, to push the boundaries much further.
Week eight. This time was different. A step into a new direction. The illusions tailored for him weren't enough. It was time to make others suffer along. As Sonic awoke, there were new feelings, new thoughts creeping into his mind, something foreign now being part of him. A mental link had been established between the hedgehog and the jackal, the two feeling each other's feelings, the two hearing each other's thoughts, the two seeing what the others see. Sonic could feel the sadistic joy the other felt, the vile pleasure in the pain of others; all to serve one purpose. To feel the joy Infinite felt as he hurt those Sonic loved. Targeting Amy specifically, the jackal's violence was fierce, harsher than anything he had done before. He ensured that she suffered too and that Sonic felt her pain. Though as she lay there, battered, bloodied, Sonic's fear, anger, regret, his passionate emotions, soon outweighed Infinite's lust, the hedgehog finally having something to fight back with. A deeper, darker side within Sonic emerged, a power within crawled out. Black. A black void consumed all. Finding this extreme mix of emotions too much to bear, the devilish illusionist soon interrupted the abuse, returning to base. Finally, after so long, after so much trauma, victory was on Sonic's side. He saved Amy. His natural tendency to care for others lead him to victory. It is what saved Amy; disposition.
Week nine. Waking up, bloodied and battered from the physical torment, those wounds couldn't ache him more than the horrid news. A revelation that the week prior wasn't a victory. That the week before resulted in a devastating loss, loss due to Sonic's lack of judgment. That in Sonic's blind rage, unbridled anger, from his inner darkness, numerous of innocents were murdered, killed. All for Amy. All those lives, perished, sacrificed for the safety of Amy. Children, now gone due to Sonic's emotions and his inner feelings. And while that didn't actually occur, it was a lie great enough to punish Sonic even further. He was judged for his careless actions, for feeling love. He was condemned. Denunciation.
And so the weeks followed, week after week, until 6 months finally came to pass, liberation was nigh, and he returned to the world to finally eradicate the foul madness. But that didn't put an end to the trauma, the hurt, the pain endured from the torture. Yet, the aftermath didn't matter. There was a war to win, a victory to be secured. For victory, one's inner pain had to be neglected, ignored, suppressed. The victory over one's self meant far less than the victory over others. And throughout the suppression, the pain only grew. Though well concealed, it grew nonetheless. It was there to stay, it is still there to stay.
5 years and 6 months ago. 2009 days ago. Freshly liberated, free from the confinement and hell he was forced to endure. But though pain and hurt still confined his mind, that didn't matter. All he needed was to find the one whose mere existence kept him going. Hearing the occasional reports of her, knowing that somewhere, out there, she was still alive, still fighting, gave him what he needed to remain sane. All his faith he had placed in her, for her wellbeing is all that ultimately mattered to him, thus allowing him to numb the pain throughout the torture. That wish to see her again, the hope of eventually being reunited with her once more is what kept him going. He had to see her. He had to see her in person again and be there for her once more. Thus, upon escaping the facility in space and returning to the headquarters, he finally greeted all those he cherished. Silver, Cream, Knuckles, Tails; them and so many, all familiar faces he longed to feel up close again. But the reunion was short-lived, for he rushed through things, one, in particular, being someone he had to feel again.
It is a memory he still enjoys returning to. Just by shutting his eyes, he can turn back time and be right there again, a moment that has become a true highlight of his life. News of his return hasn't reached her yet, she has been occupied with a mission and just returned. With the base mostly empty, the others heading off to assigned emergency operations, she silently heads to her quarters, tending to her business. Giving her a moment to settle down from the rescue mission she has just accomplished, Sonic finally grows too impatient to wait any longer. Approaching the door, he announces his presence with a few minor knocks. A minute, feeling like an hour, passes until she welcomes him, albeit in a dismissive manner. Seeing him again has become such a foreign thought that she at first holds him to be another Resistance fighter as she turns her back to him. In a nonchalant tone, she simply asks what the purpose of his visit is, only to receive a most unexpected answer.
"...Amy… Long time no see…"
She stops. Time itself comes to a halt as if everything around them comes to a sudden standstill. All that matters is this moment. The voice is undeniable but impossible. To hear that voice again has been impossible to imagine, but reality speaks for itself. Carefully turning around, she finally faces him, his appearance undeniable too. Though he appears far more exhausted, almost malnourished, and even downtrodden, it's undeniable that it's him. She attempts to say his name, struggling to mouth a single word, as each letter she tries to vocalize causes her heart to race even faster. Her expression of surprise and shock soon turns into a deep, emotional smile; her expression alone says more than any word she could utter.
Thus, in a sudden moment, the two practically jump into each other's arms, sharing a passionate embrace. Their emotions reach an all-time high, floods of tears rushing down their cheeks as they finally hold each other close, the warmth of their bodies relinquishing any sort of worry and anxiety they may have. All that matters is their heartfelt feelings for each other, their longing for each other, their vehement friendship. The two are alive, the two have survived, and they are surviving still; this assurance alone is enough to instill hope in their hearts, even for a little while, that this endless struggle and pain may have an end. That victory is near, for this moment alone is a victory long sought out.
After an incomprehensibly long moment, Sonic finally dares to break the silence, the tears steadily subsiding. In a tender, somber tone, he whispers into her ear as he slowly removes himself from her embrace:
"...how have you been…?"
She doesn't make a sound, not a word. Even more than that, her body suddenly feels cold, and the tight grip she had on him loosens up significantly. This isn't quite how he remembers it. She should be quick to answer him, this is not at all how it occurred. Is his brain playing tricks with him? It usually never does whenever he remembers this specific moment. Something is different. Though this Amy, specifically, may just be a mere figment of his mind, he pulls himself back to look at her, to check up on her, to see what is wrong. As he does so, however, the moment their eyes interlock, she reawakens, pulling him in for a sensual, unusual kiss before leaving him go. Her tender body collapses to the ground as if the kiss has sucked out all the life from her. Greatly taken aback, Sonic becomes shaky, unnerved, before gently touching her back, trying to wake her back up.
Just as his fingers touch her, however, her body is reanimated once more, firmly grasping his arm with such force that Sonic briefly shrieks in pain. Startled, the blue hedgehog becomes defenseless as Amy forces him to the ground, wrapping her brute hands around his throat and choking him relentlessly. Too confused to react, too tired to fight back, he surrenders to her will. Mustering up just enough strength, he pleads:
"..Amy… Please… Let me go… Why… Why are you doing-..."
Before he can finish, however, and in a moment too swift for even Sonic to notice on time, he finds a cold dagger piercing through his abdomen, rammed inside him with perfect precision by Amy. A tear runs down his cheek once more, this time out of sadness and confusion, as she forces the dagger deeper inside whilst moving up close to his ear, whispering in a mocking tone:
"I'm dead, that's how I've been doing. Thank you for asking."
Gasping for air and holding on to his stomach, Sonic returns to the real world, his heart racing at frenzied speeds. Has he just experienced a nightmare? Recalling that memory, even during his sleep, has never transformed into something grotesque. However, his mind can only dwell in that thought for so long, as the reality he wakes up to doesn't appear real either. The grassy landscape and the bright blue sky appear distorted, all the colors sucked out and replaced by various hues of black and red. He briefly panics, not because he believes he's stuck in another nightmare, but because it all seems too familiar. After a short moment of manically looking around the area, an all-too-familiar, dreaded voice fills his ears, now sounding so ethereal as if it surrounds him. Speaking to him, it utters:
"It has been so long, blue rat. So much time has passed, and yet, you still remember me. You will always remember me. We have gotten so close, after all."
It can't be him again. It sounds like him, the distorted world is something only he could make, but it can't be him. He is gone, and so is the tool he used to conjure up these hallucinations in the first place. That's what it is, after all. Just another hallucination. And yet, it feels so real again. Hastily dashing around to find the untraceable source of this voice, Sonic desperately searches for the one responsible for this. Surely it must be some kind of a mimic, some fraudulent imitator posing as him. All the while, the voice continues:
"I know you in and out. I'm closer to you than any of your so-called 'friends' could ever be. Not like they would want to, anyway. No one cares about you, except for me. I care so, so much about you."
After a short while of running around aimlessly, he finally reveals himself. Abruptly, he appears right beside him. Oddly enough, the minute Sonic sees him, he loses any interest in exposing him, in hurting him. The blue hedgehog remains still, incapable of movement. Their gaze interlocks, with any suspicions thrown out. Though he lacks the mask, it is him, without a shred of doubt. Infinite is here again, right in front of him, taunting him as he talks further:
"Yeah… Don't even try. I have control of you. You are a new vessel for me. You are mine. And I think now, that we are so alone, it is the perfect moment for me to finally reveal myself to you. Aren't you surprised?"
Angered, hateful, and filled with spite, Sonic snarls at him without hesitation:
"Buzz off. You're dead! Who are you really, huh?"
Shooting the hedgehog a sly smirk, the jackal explains:
"True… That is pretty true. I strongly doubt I survived being sucked into that stone, and I doubt even stronger that the stone is still intact. Fortunately… I had a failsafe. That mental link I had with you, though faulty at first, ended up working better than expected. I tinkered around with it, hidden from the doctor's eyes. I had something special planned. To say the least, throughout the experience I provided you with, and by utilizing that link to its full potential, I… planted an egg inside your brain. A mental egg."
"...what?"
"I transferred a part of my consciousness to your mind, to be blunt. And bit by bit, that part of me grew like an invincible cancer until it's at the stage where it's at now; fully developed, and now a permanent part of you. Are you still following me?"
"..."
"And while I have had plenty of control over you early on and could make you do as I please… This right here is the first time I've ever intervened this directly. Those six months I had with you sufficed in ruining you already, just absolutely ruining you. The thoughts you had, that… that unparalleled darkness inside of you… it's been there before but has increased significantly since. All I did was occasionally push you in a certain direction. All I had to do was whisper to you, maybe strengthen a certain emotion or thought further… And that was it. That is all that was necessary to give you these abrupt outbursts, to make you deny any help, to hurt your friends in ways I could never. I may have pushed you somewhat, but everything else… That was entirely you."
Overwhelmed by this horrid revelation, Sonic stutters, unable to speak as he shakes uncontrollably. Fully in control, Infinite leans against a nearby boulder, appearing comfortable as he delights in the hedgehog's crisis. With that hateful smug remaining on his face, the manipulative jackal utters:
"After spending a few years thoroughly studying your behavior and diving deep into that messed up brain of yours, I could go through everything you fear. All your worries, your anxieties… I have condensed them to the most notable ones. I find them exceptionally fascinating. I don't think you even know them yourself. How about… I clear up that mystery and just tell you? Here is everything you fear."
Feeling as he regains control of his body, Sonic immediately collapses, his knees hitting the ground. Real or not, in any other scenario he would've leaped toward Infinite and finally shut him up, but everything that is being said to him prevents him from doing so. He feels the mental control Infinite still maintains over him, the power of that news hitting the hedgehog so hard that he struggles to make sense of anything. Weak, vulnerable, all Sonic finds himself capable of doing is simply listen, listen to the maniac speak.
"You fear loss. You fear losing anyone who means anything to you. And while most are still alive, they no longer wish to associate with you. You have put them through too much hurt and pain. Another thing you fear. You fear hurting the ones you love. You fear being responsible for their pain, for their hurt. And that you are. You fear losing yourself to that darkness within you. You fear becoming the evil that hasn't been present in so long. You fear becoming just like your biological parents, dismissive and negligent, you fear that you end up becoming dismissive of the world around you. You fear a loss of freedom, as freedom is everything to you. All these things you fear have occurred, and now, all you live in is a permanent state of fear. Fear of nothing that may happen, but fear of what is happening. That is a sad life. But how exactly did these things happen?"
Filled with regret, guilt, and anguish, Sonic whimpers as he rests on the ground, adopting a fetal position as Infinite's words make him feel like a punished child. And, as any child would, he continues to listen as the jackal proceeds, now smiling, as his plan is coming along:
"Loss of freedom. Running used to be your main source of freedom. I picked that up during one of our sessions. The look in your eyes when your legs were ripped off… That look said everything. And I'm not taking your speed away from you. Don't worry, I won't make you go through that again. On the contrary, I need your speed for my purpose. Soon, very soon, you will be entirely under my control. You will do my bidding, and I will enact revenge on everyone who has ruined me. And with everyone divided, it's much easier to take them out one by one. I am going to enjoy it, and you are going to enforce it. No more freedom for you. You are mine now, Sonic."
With that realization, Sonic's whimpering concludes, now replaced by heavy, irregular breathing. Tossing and turning himself on the ground, a wave of other emotions overcome him, sparking him to vocalize animalistic grunts. Beaming with sadistic joy, Infinite steadily walks up to him, his tone steadily increasing in volume.
"You fear becoming dismissive and negligent. You realize that the older you get, the more responsibilities you have. Despite your uncontrollable behavior, you are still viewed not only as the leader of the Restoration but as THE leader, period. From children to the elderly, they view you as a hero, at least, and a god, at most. And that responsibility you have as a role model isn't something you should overlook. People will imitate you, people will follow you. And if you stop caring about the world, if you give up on the world, the way your parents gave up on you… then they will have lost their hope, as you lost yours back then. And though you regained it eventually, you realize that your influence is so large that they won't. Once you surrender yourself to me, I will see to it that it occurs. You will no longer care about them, only for yourself, and the people will notice it immediately. And there will be no one else to inspire them anymore. We will see to that."
Displaying behavior only comparable to a temper tantrum, Sonic repeatedly hits his head against the ground, all the emotions becoming one, a singular burst of pure rage. All the hatred, pain, anger, and everything else become a heated fuel, bursting with adrenaline as the hedgehog feels close to finally snapping. Now standing right before him, the jackal laughingly carries on:
"Heh, you fear hurting the ones you love! And that is precisely what you have been doing all along! You ruthlessly stole Knuckles' credit for all the work he had done, you offended his culture, and in an outburst, you crushed his hands. He has them replaced now. They're robotic now. Think he likes having robot hands? Tails was always there to listen to your aches, to lend an ear to your troubles. And each time he reached out to give you any kind of professional help, you snapped at him, leading to another outburst. He only goes by Miles now. That was your doing. And after everything, Amy still tried to reason with you. She loved you so much, she was truly loyal. She was a special soul. The way she loved you almost made me feel loved too; what you did hurt me too. How, in the heat of a moment, in your worst outburst, you [...]! Monster!"
Screaming, shouting his lungs out, Sonic relieves all these horrid events, unwillingly playing along with Infinite's game. As his rage reaches unparalleled highs, the vile self within him steadily emerges, as his fur darkens, claws growing from his fingers, an ebony aura emitting from his body.
"And in direct connection to what I just said, you fear losing the ones you love. You have lost them, and you still love them. And you know, you are fully aware that they don't love you back. They despise you now. They left you for a reason. Injuring Knuckles in such a way was the last straw. He has revoked your connection to the Master Emerald, and to the Chaos Emeralds. You have been expelled from that power. And if you even dare to come anywhere close to the island, you can be certain that he will hunt you and kill you on sight. Tails, or, more accurately, Miles is leading that science team in space, conducting all sorts of experiments and helping the world far more than you ever could. He is a much better hero than you. And because he wants nothing to do with you, he is much more mature than you. And Amy… [...]! [...]! You rat!"
He feels himself losing his mind, losing sense of anything, losing control of his mind. Merely by conveying these events in such a mocking way, it is enough for Sonic to finally cross that edge. The Blue Blur feels himself no longer caring for anything or anyone, now only acting upon the emotion he feels, and everything surrounding Infinite. He feels how he's losing himself to the black void, that, which consumes all. All is lost.
"And now, you fear losing yourself to that darkness, that darkness inside you. And I can see that unfolding right before my eyes. In just a little bit, you will be reduced to nothing but a mindless brute, with anything resembling sense or goodness withering away entirely. You will permanently remain in that form, stuck in a permanent outburst. You will become a vessel for me to control, unrestricted. My own resurrection will be complete, and I will emerge truly victorious. I pretty much have already. I have won, hedgehog. Victory is mine! Now, go loose, slave!"
A memory. Before everything can fade away, there is one more memory. In a sudden instant, the hurt, the anger stops, Infinite becomes silent. One more memory.
4 years ago. 1460 days ago. The world is healing. So much has been done, so much work has been put forth to help those displaced by the war. Now is a time of rest, to regain strength, and to soothe the mind. Sitting on a rooftop, the two gaze at the stars, as the sky has become clearer than ever, the environment finally clean. The two have restlessly worked together and now share this exquisite moment. A beautiful silence allows the two to breathe until one breaks the silence:
"...by the way, that transporter I designed? The one that can fly? Reunited 260 families in just one week."
Snickering at the comment, the other responds:
"Yeah, yeah, but whose idea was it, huh? I deserve at least… 70 percent of the credit!"
The two share a mild chuckle, followed by brief silence before the other remarks:
"...you've gotten real good at this, y'know. Saving folks, being there for them… It's like… Eh, nevermind."
Perking up, the two-tailed companion shifts his gaze at the other, inquiring:
"Hey… What's up? You know you can tell me everything."
Staring off into the distance, the hedgehog thinks for a moment, before answering:
"...it's just… Well… You and everyone else have done a tremendous job at this. You guys were great before, but you are really outdoing yourselves with this. And honestly… I don't think I can keep up anymore, especially with you. I just.. ever since I was captured, I feel like I haven't been myself. I feel like a wreck, honestly, holding you back with my issues. You're just… too good for someone like me."
Though it's startling for Sonic to admit to such feelings, Tails has been observant throughout and has clearly noticed the deterioration of his characteristic pride, even if he has been efficient at hiding it. Thus, scooting closer to him, the two touch shoulders as Tails utters in a soft tone:
"...you know you're still my hero, right?"
Tsk-tsking at the remark, Sonic simply scoffs:
"Yeah… Right."
With a more serious expression on his face, Tails answers:
"I mean it, Sonic. You've always been someone I've looked up to, and I still look up to you. You will always be my role model, my older bro. Everything you do, the way you do it, I keep trying to imitate. Right now you're going through some heavy stuff. Real heavy stuff, and I can't even begin to imagine what that is like. But I'm still gonna stick with you. We all are. We're going to help you through this; you would've done the same. That's why you're the best, Sonic. You're the one who brought us all together. Without you, dude… The world wouldn't be the same. Not then, not now, not ever. You're still my best friend for a reason."
Allowing the words to settle in, Sonic eventually looks at him, a faint smile forming on his face. His tone matches that of Tails, as he utters:
"Heh… Thanks, dude… I really needed to hear that…"
As Tails gaze shifts back up to the stars, he quietly states:
"The stars will stay there forever. Despite everything, they still shine their light. We'll keep doing our thing, together. Despite it all, we'll keep going. Even if we stumble along the way, we'll remain steadfast and keep going. Always."
Always keep going. Victory is only achieved with movement.
His mind feels clearer than ever before as if he has transcended far beyond that which is comprehensible. What once was an area haunted by black and red colors has become a celestial masterpiece of shimmering gold and glistening white. Peace and tranquility, a sensation he hasn't truly felt ever since that reunion hug with his heart. In this serene state, Sonic finally acquires the opportunity to reflect on what his mind truly seeks, what his mind truly needs. Scenes unfold before him, scenes of redemption. Gaining peace of mind through the support system he helped to establish, stepping up as a proper role model, reaching out to Miles, reaching out to Knuckles, reaching out to Shadow, reaching out to Silver, reaching out to Blaze, reaching out to Cream, reaching out to them and many others; those who strengthen him, and whom he can offer strength too. The scenes of redemption, of a path of improvement, of a path to feeling peace once more. The possibilities are endless.
Possibilities of hope. Hope leads to victory.
A deep breath, a moment to simply calm down is all that is needed. Emerging himself in the light, he is soon engulfed by the peace. Waking back up, renewed, he has used his inner darkness to convert it into a new, far more powerful energy. The mental character of Infinite steps back, terrified by the hedgehog's ethereal appearance. His fur a glorious white, his eyes, gloves, and shoes engulfed by a gold aura. The black void tried to consume all, but couldn't consume that greater than all.
The dark world Infinite had conjured up crumbles around him, as color returns to the world. After a missed step from carelessly walking backward, the frightened sadist falls to the ground. With his hand stretched out, he gestures to Sonic to stay back, as he musters up the last hints of courage he has to threaten:
"A-Alright rat, nice light show, but you're still mine. Surrender now, and I'll maybe go easy on your 'friends'..."
Hovering above the ground, the glowing hedgehog towers above the quivering jackal. Bursts of dark energy leak from Sonic's hands, all moving to Infinite and encircling his silhouette. Thereafter, a black mist steadily engulfs the illusionist, starting with his feet and moving up to his legs. Speaking in a cosmically enhanced tone, Sonic dismisses his empty threats and declares:
"You really are desperate to be a part of me, huh? Well, if you're going to stick with me for the ride, then ya might as well make the ride enjoyable. I'm done letting fear control me. I'm so done. From now on, I'll be the one in control. You'll be my means to take back control."
As the darkness further consumes Infinite's body, he squeals pathetically, as he suddenly feels the same fear Sonic feels, now experiencing the hedgehog's years of pain as if it were his own.
"You will become the embodiment of my fear, the vessel of my darkness. Fear, anger, hatred… It can give me great strength too, and I wouldn't be alive without these emotions. I will still experience these emotions naturally, but for times when I need a boost of power, for when I may need more of my darkness to emerge… I'll do so through you. You will be my source of backup energy."
The jackal's screams vanish, as everything around him becomes further distorted. With barely anything left of him, he desperately attempts to claw out from the energy, only for his arms to be engulfed as well.
"I will still require years of proper help to deal with my trauma, my hurt. Perhaps I will never get rid of it. But I will learn to live with it. To be free despite of it. In the meantime, you will remain in a permanent state of fear, forced to relieve all my trauma tenfold. And I won't even notice your suffering, nor will I care."
Before the jackal vanishes entirely, he has just enough strength to shout:
"MERCY, MERCY PLEASE! HAVE MERCY!"
The last thing Infinite sees, the last thing Infinite hears, is the distinct outline of Sonic's form and the hedgehog's concluding words to him:
"Fuck you."
Black. A black void consumes all, as Sonic defeats the demon, keeping him tucked away in the back of his mind, and so, the black void consumes.
Victory.
…
Thus, in a sudden moment, the two practically jump into each other's arms, sharing a passionate embrace. Their emotions reach an all-time high, floods of tears rushing down their cheeks as they finally hold each other close, the warmth of their bodies relinquishing any sort of worry and anxiety they may have. All that matters is their heartfelt feelings for each other, their longing for each other, their vehement friendship. The two are alive, the two have survived, and they are surviving still; this assurance alone is enough to instill hope in their hearts, even for a little while, that this endless struggle and pain may have an end. That victory is near, for this moment alone is a victory long sought out for.
After an incomprehensibly long moment, Sonic finally dares to break the silence, the tears steadily subsiding. In a tender, somber tone, he whispers into her ear as he slowly removes himself from her embrace:
"...how have you been…?"
She moves back, just enough to face him, just enough to still hold him close. Their eyes interlock, their dreamy gaze saying more than enough. Whatever troubles the two have had to endure, are all meaningless at this moment. A moment that seems right, to finally do something that feels right. Though they succumb to their emotions, it's something both have craved for so long.
And thus, they share a kiss.
It's a beautiful memory. One of, if not, the most beautiful memory he can recall. It's one he has replayed over and over again, feeling a sense of relief and peace after. A beautiful memory like no other, impossible to replicate again. But, far from meaning that there can't be other beautiful memories to be recalled. Other memories can be made, other moments experienced. For life, despite all its tribulations, can still be beautiful if made beautiful. Beauty can still be found in moments of hardship. The future may be more uncertain than ever, but life is to be enjoyed, not dreaded. Nothing will take away his joy again, for he can become better, be better. As uncertain as the future may be, it still remains bright. There is still hope.
There will always be hope.
The fight of life is difficult, but victory is just ahead.
Victory.
victory
/ˈvɪkt(ə)ri/
noun
an act of defeating an enemy or opponent in a battle, game, or other competition.
"an election victory"
synonyms: success, triumph, conquest, win, etc.
