I hate my cousin, Kermit Lovette.
Well, no. I don't hate him. He is family, after all. Maybe hate is a strong word. But I really, really, really do not like him. If he could disappear off the face of the Earth, I would be happy.
That's just how I feel. So you can only imagine how I felt when my parents told me that I was going to spend the entire weekend ALONE with my cousin. They had to go off on a business trip, so I'm going to be left with the most annoying person in the world for THREE DAYS.
He's two years younger than me, with very pale skin, a mop of curly white-blond hair and round dark eyes behind big red plastic-framed glasses.
One thing about Kermit that I can't stand is that he always brings over his science table where he spends a large portion of his time performing experiments and concocting scientific potions. The chemicals he burned into the atmosphere always made me sick, he loved to do his little experiments in the living room/kitchen, so I can't even sit on the couch and watch TV.
I lived in a small house with my parents. It had two bedrooms, an adjoined kitchen-living room, with a small staircase that leads upstairs. So whenever Kermit cooks up something, I will smell it.
So the first thing I did when he arrived was confront him. He had his entire science kit in his full backpack. "Do that outside!" I demanded hotly.
Kermit glared at me, he turned around to shut the door behind him. "No. Aunt Kara said I could. So you can deal with it!" He stuck his tongue at me petutally.
I grew angry and clenched my fists. "Well you're in MY house and I'm older than you!"
"So?" Kermit took a bold step closer. "I can do whatever I want, Steven! You can't tell me what to do!" With that, he bypassed me with a grin.
For a moment, all I wanted to do was to pound his face in. I could. I'm fifteen years old with an athletic build, so I'm stronger and faster than he is.
But I don't want to get in trouble with Mom and Dad, so instead I isolated myself to my bedroom and endured an entire day of Kermit stinking up the kitchen. It was only on the next Saturday when I called up my best friend, Mia Smith.
"What's up?" She answered on the first ring.
"Mind coming over?" I asked.
"Sure, what's up?"
"Kermit is here." I said quietly. "I swear I'm about to kill him!"
Mia giggled. "Oh, calm down, Steven. He's not that bad."
I almost wanted to roll my eyes. Kermit was different around Mia. He admittedly has a crush on her so he always acts on his best behavior around her. Can't blame him, I personally have a crush on her. Mia is very cute with her straight brown hair and vivid green eyes that shone like emeralds.
"He's a complete angel when you're around!" I argued. "Just please come over, I really don't want to be alone with him all weekend."
"Alright, I got to ask my Mom if I can stay over for the whole weekend." Mia agreed. "Mind if I invite Veronica too?"
"Veronica? Really?" Veronica is Mia's closest friend and one of the most annoying girls in school. She and Mia are very popular, but at least Mia has a nice personality and is on the basketball team. Veronica is just...well..an annoying rich girl. Like Mia, she is very pretty, I'll admit prettier than Mia. Sophisticated, long wavy black hair, and bright blue eyes. But kinda bitchy.
"I don't care. As long as I'm not alone with Einstein over here." I said in relief.
"Alright. See ya." Mia hung up.
Suddenly I had an urge to have some of my CookienCream ice cream I brought last night. I needed something sweet to calm down my nerves.
I stepped out of my bedroom just in time to see a cloud of sharp-smelling smoke filled the cramped living-room/kitchen. The burning stench in the air burned the hairs in my nostrils. I went into a harsh coughing fit and glared at my cousin. He was already brewing up some crap. Bubbling chemical beakers sat on the coffee table, a grinning, google-wearing Kermit was blending liquids into one beaker.
The room smelled putrid, nausea rose up my throat and I had to kneel over for a moment.
I can't handle this for two more days.
That was when I lost it. "You idiot!" I lunged over to Kermit, my fist connected with his jaw and I knocked him off of his feet. He fell to the floor, skidded across the carpet and slammed his head against the wall. But Kermit didn't go down from that hard hit. Instead he sprang up to his feet with an angry roar and threw his body weight behind the fist that edged closer to my face, it hit my jaw with such force blood pooled into my mouth. Pain erupted from the point of impact. With my own two hands I grasped his head in my hands and brought my knee cap up to his nose, there was a blunt crack and I released his blonde haired head. Crimson leaked from both his nostrils and his nose was twisted right. He drew his fist back again and it ploughed into my stomach, it was like hitting a train head on. I launched one hard kick into his stomach that knocked the wind of him and thrust a fist into his jaw, subduing him instantly.
I was left huffing and panting, adrenaline pumping through my veins. I took a step back, struggling to collect myself.
I turned around to head into my bedroom when I heard Kermit breaking out into a furious scream. "YOU ASSHOLE!" I whirled around just in time for the beaker to slammed into my face, hot purple liquid flew in all direction and drenched me from my face to my shoes.
A wave of the liquid flooded my mouth and down my throat and I had no choice but to swallow. The bitter taste burned my tongue. A horrible taste filled my mouth.
"Ulp!"
"AAAARGH!" A hoarse scream escaped my throat. "I'VE BEEN POISONED! I'VE BEEN POISONED!" I screamed.
My stomach heaved.
But Kermit was not having it. "I DON'T CARE! WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM, STEVEN?" Kermit was enraged. His glasses were bent, barely hanging off of his bruised face. Jumping up and down like a demon, yelling and screaming swears and obscenities at me.
He threw liquid filled beakers at me, I managed to dodge them all, the beakers shattered into fragments on the floor and spilling through the living room and kitchen. Kermit released out an angry cry, broke into tears, and ran down the hallway. "Screw you, Steven!" He seethed.
But I didn't care. "OPEN THE DAMN WINDOWS!" I screamed before I hobbled to the bathroom as the nausea twisted my stomach. I felt strange, a little dizzy. I blinked a few times. The wallpaper seemed to be rising up on both sides of me. I glanced up. That made me feel even dizzier. The ceiling suddenly appeared much higher than usual. The bathroom door rose a mile over my head. Was something wrong with my eyes? My tongue felt dry. Kind of itchy. I could taste the sour chemicals on the roof of my mouth.
I reached for my toothbrush.
Why did I have to stand on tiptoe to reach over the sink?
My arms weren't long enough to reach the toothbrush in its cup.
I had to jump high to grab it. I wrapped my hand around it.
The toothbrush felt so heavy. I had to hold it in both hands.
My head barely poked above the sink. I couldn't reach the faucet. I didn't want to believe it. But I had no choice. I stood there, my whole body trembling.
My teeth began to chatter in fear.
The toothbrush was almost as big as a baseball bat!
"I … can't be shrinking," My voice came out so tiny and high. "I can't be shrinking. That's impossible. I can't be shrinking."
Amazingly my clothes shrunk with me, so there's that at least. But I was so tiny that I was the size of a sugar ant.
Everything around me was enormous. "HELP! HELP! ANYONE!" I screamed in my tiny voice.
Thankfully I didn't close the bathroom door all the way, so there was a sizable gap for me to exit out of. I ran out of the bathroom and onto the carpet. The fabric of the carpet rose like a forest for me. The loud noise of the TV is louder than ever.
I had to get somewhere high. Somewhere someone could see me. If I stayed on the floor, I would die.
The closest room is, of course, the living-room so I made my way.
I had no idea how long it took. One hour? Three? Four? I had no concept of time and with my new height, the living room felt a league away.
When I came to the nearest couch, I clung to the leather and climbed. For a brief moment, I felt like a little kid, climbing a tree. It would be a fun experience, if I wasn't completely terrified.
For a litany of hours, I climbed and climbed. My muscles cramped, my legs twinged with pain. But I kept climbing and climbing. A plethora of thoughts roamed through my head. "Did Kermit do this on purpose?" I asked myself. "Will I stay like this forever?"
I then heard a buzzing sound of the rotating fan that was in the back of the living room. Since it was summertime, Dad kept it on during the day for me so I could cool off.
I actually forgot about it because of everything. The fan was gradually moving left to right momentarily. I had to be careful as I knew I would not be able to withstand a direct hit of wind. But I was too high to go down, so I doggedly kept going up.
I had no idea what to do by the time I reached the top of the arm of the couch. "KERMIT! KERMIT!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.
"AHH!"
But before I could do anything, I heard a booming sound across the room.
The front door swung open and it was Mia. She opened the door and looked around. "Steven?" Her voice boomed. "Steven, I'm here."
I almost burst out into tears. "MIA! MIA! PLEASE!" I panicked, jumping up and down, screaming at the top of my lungs.
"AH!" My body was blown into the air when the powerful wind of the fan impacted me. "AHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I was flung into Mia's direction and the next thing I know I slammed into a soft fabric.
My lungs stung from the screaming, my head spinning violently. "Ohhh…" I moaned.
I used all of my remaining strength to look up to see a gigantic Mia's chin.
"Steven?" Her mere voice shook me to my core like thunder. My eardrums nearly burst open, I had to cling to her pale blouse with all of my might as I felt like I was going to fall off at any moment.
"Mia?" I heard Kermit emerging from the guest room. His eyes lit up with excitement upon seeing Mia. A lopsided grin creased up his face.
"Kermit, what happened to your face?" Mia began to move to him and I had to clutch her shirt for dear life. "Stop it, Mia!" But my pleas fell on deaf ears as Mia picked up the pace.
Kermit's eyes were tear-stained. He sniffled loudly. "Steven beat me up." He whined.
Mia was sympathetic. "Are you okay?"
Kermit shook his head. "No! I didn't do anything! Steven just hates me! He just snapped and wailed on me!" He wept.
I rolled my eyes and mumbled something foul under my breath. Yes, I was not empathic to his plight. I feel like I have a bigger problem, you know.
"Where is Steven?" Mia demanded. I could tell from Mia that she was going to tell me off for beating up my cousin.
"I don't know! We had a fight and I went to my room!" Kermit wailed.
Mia put a gentle hand on his shoulder and he blushed profusely. "Well let's just get some ice cream, okay? That will make you feel better, right?" She spoke to him slowly, like a little kid.
Kermit sniffled. "Kay."
With that, I was jerked up and down as Mia hurried to the kitchen. There I noticed that the confusing sight of my brand new Cookie'nCream ice cream was out of the fridge and open.
Why is my ice cream…out? Did Kermit….?
Before I could finish the thought, Mia proceeded to make a nice, big bowl of chocolate and cookie dough ice cream for herself.
The sweet smell of the ice cream made my stomach rumble as she strolled into the small dining room where the stench was less prominent.
"Mia! Mia!" I screamed in vain. I could feel my grip slipping. I know I will fall at any moment. I climbed up to her chest, hoping that she would see me.
Mia placed down her heaping bowl of ice cream.
Kermit's eyes widened when he looked at the bowl. "Mia, is…is..that Steven's ice cream?" His voice was edged with hesitance.
Mia gave him a look. "Um…yes, I'm starving," Her voice took on a suspicious tone. "Is there a problem?"
Kermit's cheeks went red. "I kinda want the chocolate ice cream instead."
A small smile crawled up Mia's face as she pointed a nonchalant finger to the kitchen. "Well then get it, more for me."
"No, no. Mia, I…I…think.." Kermit's protest fell short when Mia gave him a confused look.
"Is there a problem?"
Kermit was silent for a second, before answering in a quiet voice. "No….it's just I'm scared that Steven will be pissed if he thinks I ate all of his ice cream."
Mia's suspicious expression disappeared when she heard that. Her pretty smile remained, and she laid a hand on Kermit's shoulder. "Everything will be okay."
"I can't stand Steven!" Kermit whined. "He is such a jerk!"
Mia shook her head and I screamed in panic as I nearly slipped. "No, I know you and Steven both. You know how much he hates it when you bring all of that science stuff! You should have asked him if you could bring it over to his house!" She scolded.
Kermit flinched as if Mia struck him. A remorseful look crossed his face. "Maybe," But that look was short-lived as he became defensive. "He attacked me out of nowhere! He just flipped out!"
"And why did he?" Mia probed. "What did you do?"
Kermit's voice lowered. "I was cooking up my experiment." He mumbled.
"And did Steven ask you not too?"
"Nope."
"Kermit…"
"Maybe."
"And how did you react?"
"I kinda flipped too. After he hit me, I threw a beaker at him."
Then the sheer momentum of Mia jerking upright in her seat sent me into a freefall. "What?" Her boom voice outsounds my blood curdling scream. "Are you insane?"
"He hit me!" Kermit excused.
"Doesn't matter! You threw glass at him! Where is Steven?"
"I don't know." Kermit turned his face away with a pout.
Mia sighed in annoyance. "Knowing Steven, he must have gone out on a walk to calm himself down."
I land stomach-first into Mia's bowl of ice cream. The coldness curled into my skin and I was shivering uncontrollably. All of the air abandoned my lungs and I'm left a limp, breathless mess. When Mia suddenly picked up her spoon, it occurred to me that she could easily gobble me up too if she wanted to and she wouldn't even know. I was helpless as the sweet cream swallowed my arms and legs like deep snow. I was small enough to go unnoticed. I looked like one of those specks in the ice cream.
Mia first began to eat around me. Scooping up a spoonful into her mouth. Her mood lightened immediately. "Once Steven gets home, you need to apologize to him."
Kermit nodded his head. "Fine."
I need to get out. I need to get out. I yanked and pulled with all of my might, but the ice cream was almost like quicksand. I was only able to watch helplessly as Mia repeatedly scooped up the ice cream, the large spoonfuls disappearing without a trace into her mouth.
I heard her swallow over and over, her satisfied sigh after each bite. She spoke before bites with Kermit, laughing and giggling with him.
It was then my turn.
The titanic girl was now lifting the spoonful that contained me up to her glossy, red lips. I was submerged into the ice cream at this point and I knew I had to make the most sound I could. Scream, shout, yell. knew this was my chance. I sucked in a lungful of air to release out the loudest and primal scream I could muster.
"AH-"
My screams were cut short. I was stuffed without hesitation into Mia's hungry, waiting mouth. Her squishy, slimy tongue ran greedily across me, pushing me down into her dough-studded ice cream. I did my best to remain calm as the saliva coated me. Her mouth was like a dark, slimy cavern.
My tiny heart beat a mile a minute. I was rapidly losing faith in the idea that Mia would notice where I was. All semblance of composure fled from me as her enormous tongue pushed me over to the side of her mouth. Massive, intimidating white molars loomed above, poised to strike at any instant.
My mind raced in a million directions but seemed to go nowhere. I went still and numb with fear as the situation worsened with the most dreaded sound I could have imagined.
ULP!
Mia's mighty gulp flung my little body down her throat as if I was air. My struggling, my kicking, my screaming made no difference. Nothing slowed my descent into her waiting gut even a little bit.
More ice cream followed me down her throat. I could hear Mia's heart emitting a thundering rhythm somewhere in the pitch darkness. Her stomach gurgled with happy contentment.
I was unceremoniously plunged into the tight chaos of her stomach. I landed on a piece of a greenish mush from her earlier meal. To my horror it went right on churning as it had been doing just minutes ago as I dropped inside. A thunderous gurgle boomed within. My presence made no difference to this nightmare prison other than prompting a loud gurgle.
"MIA!" I screamed, my voice hoarse at this point. "MIA!" Piece of ice cream plopped in her belly, sending ripples into the stomach acid. Another booming gurgle sounded as more and more scoops of ice cream dropped in.
I was simply at sea at this point. Floating chunks of vegetables and other food bobbing near me. Me stranded on a little island in a brownish ocean. The water cascaded with waves up and down, each ice cream dropping prompting a thunderous gurgle and groan.
"Mia is going to digest me." I muttered. The girl that I liked ever since kindergarten is now going to digest me. One thing I know about Mia is that she loves to eat. So I know this small meal of ice cream will not be here only one. I know how the digestive system works so I know that I don't have much time.
BLOORP! A new sound brought a fresh sense of terror in me. Her stomach suddenly shook as if there was a short earthquake.
Then came a waterfall of orange fizzy liquid coursed into her stomach in a steady stream.
"AHHHH!" I was flung into the air by the sheer force of the liquid splashing into her stomach. The waves grew so large that the mush I'm on was now riding up and down the mighty swelling sea like a child's toy.
As a result, a sudden air bubble formed in the center of her stomach. I felt the air inside of her stomach thinning suddenly. Then Mia unleashed a deafening belch that sent me flying.
UUUUUUUURRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPP!
I was freefalling in the air from the sheer pressure of the belch. Landing on a floating lot of something brownish.
I heard Mia's voice once the belch ended. "Excuse me. Didn't know where that came from."
I lost it, pounding my little fist on the walls of her stomach and squirming in the sopping muck of her digesting meal.
But my pleas was in vain. I heard Mia suddenly talk. "God, I'm starving. I didn't eat much this morning. Got anything else?"
I heard Kermit's voice. "Yeah, Auntie said we had some pizza left."
My heart skipped a beat. "NOOOO! NOOO!"
I attempted to climb up the stomach wall, only to expectedly slide down due to the slime. But I was stranded in her belly, unable to do anything. I watched in horror as muck after muck began to dissolve into nothingness. I could barely manage to stay afloat as the hot, slimy walls of her stomach mashed up and condensed everything inside. The force pressed me downward, shoving me underneath the food and leaving me even more covered in the liquid mush. The churning and gurgling of her growling stomach rang louder than ever.
"MIA! MIA! PLEASE DO NOT EAT!" I hollered.
Then she started to eat again. A barrage of chunks of pizza rained down into her stomach.
I cowered helplessly as I watched the shower of food piling in. Rainfall of soda begins to pour furiously, drowning any sight of certainty. Monstrous waves of contrasting shades slam the muck.
I suddenly felt strange, tingly and ear ringing. I then realized something. Food chunks around me started to shrink. One jagged pizza chunk stood beside me and I was taller than it.
No longer was I the size of a sugar ant. I was now the same as a hornet.
I was starting to grow. Whatever Kermit was made was starting to wear off.
"Ohh…." I groaned when my head started to spin.
I could feel Mia's belly starting to rumble. This time more violent than ever. Gigantic bubbles fiercely formed in the water, as my world shook. Another waterfall of orange soda splashed into her stomach.
"Oh shit!" I cried as I knew what was coming.
Then Mia unleashed a titanic belch that sent me into the air, up her throat and out of her mouth. Everything happened so fast, I was propelled into the air like a bug, the blinding lights, the cool air, and the deafening noises. But the clearest voice that seemed to come closer and closer is Veronica and the next thing I knew was inside a dark, wet cavern that was filled with Veronica's reedy voice. "Holy shit, Mia!" She remarked.
"Oh no." The realization fell on me like a ton of bricks. "Don't..!"
Then came the most terrifying, but yet expected sound that made me still with terror.
"ULP!"
Veronica's sudden gulp pushed me down her throat with only slight difficulty. For all my struggling and fighting I did not slow my descent into her waiting gut even a little bit. Strangely enough, however, the deeper I sank the less panicked he became. I found myself oddly soothed by the inner workings of Veronica's body and her hungry belly. Her heart beat a thundering rhythm somewhere in the pitch darkness. Her stomach gurgled with happy contentment as the last of its food finally was finally coming inside.
All this actually served to calm me during my long descent into the belly of Veronica Martin. I would soon be in for a rude awakening, however. I was abruptly ripped from my soothed state as her throat pushed me unceremoniously into the tight chaos of her full stomach. To my horror it went right on churning as it had been doing just minutes ago as I dropped inside. My presence made no difference to this nightmare prison other than prompting a loud gurgle.
I barely managed to get these words out of my mouth, retching with disgust the whole way through. Some relief came to me though as my nose finally seemed to give out from the constant barrage. I banged against the walls of her stomach and squirming in the sopping muck of her digesting meal.
On top of all this I would soon be met with yet another trial. Just as I seem to be getting my bearings within the thrashing mess of Veronica's gut there came a surge of pressure from all sides. I could barely manage to stay afloat as the hot, slimy walls of her stomach mashed up and condensed everything inside. The force of them pressed me downward, shoving him underneath the mess that was Veronica's food and leaving me even more covered in the liquid mush. The churning and gurgling of her packed stomach rang louder than ever in his ears as he was played around with.
All the abdominal flexing and splashing was freeing up the excess air bubbles within her. All those extra bits of air that had been gulped down with the rest of her meal of pizza and soda were banding together... and they wanted out. Before she was quite ready for it her mouth opened and she unleashed a powerful belch.
"UUUUUUUURRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPP!"
I called out fruitlessly inside her gut before a wave of horrid stomach stench hit me. The mix of meaty stew, sweet ice cream, and fresh vegetables mashed together among whatever else had made up Veronica's dinner made me gag uncontrollably. Veronica's stomach was more disgusting than Mia's. The doughy ice cream prison I'd been trapped in melted away with ease inside the churning gut, leaving me at the mercy of the contents of the stomach.
I squirmed and struggled as much as I could to no avail. Veronica's belly gave no reaction but to bubble and slosh around even more, as unforgiving as ever. I was losing hope. I was sure his situation could get no worse... Until he felt some air bubbles push up against me. All around me it seemed that pressure was building. Countless bubbles were surely scrambling to the top of the stomach as I floated in place.
I only just managed to utter these words before the stomach rumbled furiously. Somewhere high above me came the muffled sound of a titanic belch escaping Veronica's lips. With less air inside it to fill up space, my living prison shrunk even tighter around me. The surge of activity rolled and tumbled me against the slimy stomach walls and smeared me in its icky contents.
