Dear Mimi,

Dear Mimi,

Is that true? Is everything Sora told me true?

Are you really in love with me?

I never meant to hurt you...I honestly never, ever would purposely make you cry. Never...but it looks like I already have.

I don't know how Sora found out. She ran to me this afternoon after school, blubbering something about a letter and a diary, and then she blurted out that you loved me. When I questioned her, she couldn't say any more, other than that's what she knew. And then she asked me if I loved you.

What was I supposed to say? I'd loved Mimi the moment I'd met her, but couldn't show it? I was too afraid...I was broken family trailer trash and you were a princess, so high above me, so amazingly beautiful, so precious, so childlike. Your smile and laugh made me think that we'd be okay, your tears reminded me that I was human, and it was okay to feel lost. But Mimi...you left...you left us all behind, and what I felt faded. I thought I saw a flicker of what I felt before in Sora...and I fell in love. But what on earth was I supposed to say?

I lied. I said I didn't care, I put my arm around Sora, said you must be going through a phase. But my heart was breaking, agonisingly slowly.

Then you walked out of the classroom opposite, and our eyes locked, your beautiful eyes...so painfully innocent, with traces of agony and chaos and hurt swirling in their warm depths. Your face, so withdrawn, the faintest flickers of pain touching it as you looked at me.

I could have screamed on the spot, crying out for mercy. My heart was breaking, I was losing my mind...I'd lost the chance for purity in my life. As you walked away, I started to tremble. My stomach lurched and I had to close my eyes to regain my balance. A wonderful girlfriend was snuggling close to me, Taichi, best friend I could have ever hoped for, was waving at me from the end of the hall, I had my guitar on my shoulder and a hit-record in my back pocket.

And the only thing I wanted was being blown away cruelly by the winds of fate.

Mimi...it's 4:17 as I'm writing this. I should be doing my homework. But I can't. I keep looking out the window, seeing the sun shine through this spring rain, making a rainbow. It reminds me of you, as you are to me...so beautiful, sparkling, yet unreachable. You're the one person I can't reach. I can't take my eyes off it, yet I have to take my eyes off you.

I remember when I walked you home in the snow. You were so close to me...I thought you were cold. When you pressed close to me, I wrapped my arms around you. And when we parted ways at the crossroads...the snow turned to rain.

Can you remember that summer? The beginning of everything? It wasn't all bad...I remember how we all ran through the Digital World, laughing and forgetting, for a moment, that we weren't normal kids. I remember you giggling and smiling, and I thought that we could fly...become a rainbow. But the rainbow disappeared, and nothing is left but the rain. I stopped dreaming...Mimi, I've forgotten how to laugh...it's too late now.

Some things are more precious than friendship, some things are more precious than love...but nothing is more precious than the purest emotion...a single tear, a light kiss, a smile that lasts forever. I've realised that, this is the end of our journey...and my final destination was you. I wanted to become your rainbow...but instead, I'm trapped in the heart of a rainstorm, and the downpour will continue forever in my heart. I'll have love, but it will be wasted forever.

Mimi...I'm sorry for what I never did.

Yours,
Yamato

~
[notes]
This fic was loosely based around the song "Niji Ni Naritai" (I Want To Become A Rainbow) by Tube. You can read the lyrics here.