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100 Things Harry Potter Characters Will Never Say:
1. Harry: I wanna be a Slytherin!!!
2. Ron: I looove Parvati Patil! Oh, I looove her!
3. Seamus: So, Dean, heard any updates about soccer?
Dean: Soccer?
4. Parvati: Professor Trelawney? A human? All this time I thought she was an oversized dragonfly with specs.
5. Lavender: That's it! I have to stop snooping around like this!
6. Oliver: Hey, dudes! I'm back!
Angelina: Oliver, what are you doing?
Alicia: Why are you back? To watch your old great team win another match?
Oliver: Great team? Heck no! You guys are losers! Losers!
7. Hermione: The truth is… I'm not really a witch! I'm Invader Zim! Ha! Ha! Ha! Gir, put your jets on, and take me out of here!
Ron: Jets on!
8. Snape: Oh yeah! Who let the dogs out?
9. Sinistra: Somewhere out there away from planet Pluto…
10. Draco: Go away, Crabbe! I need to study!
11. Dumbledore: When I grow up…I want to be an old man! Ha! Ha! Ha!!!
12. Harry: What's his name? Oh yeah, baby! Kuzco!!!
13. Hermione: Aren't I lovely?
Ron: Defi-net-ly not!
14. Padma: I am like, gonna be a valley girl when I grow up, and like, have three million cars, and have a husband named Ron, and…
15. Crabbe: I speak!
16. Goyle: I live! Woooo!
17. Hagrid: It's a Blast Ended Skrewt! Ah! Get it away from me!
18. Lee Jordan: That's a foul!
Harry: Aw, pipe down. We all know you smell foul, but keep it to yourself!
19. Draco: Fish, fish, fish!
Harry: What's up with him?
Pansy: He's been hitting his head on a fish tank. Not like it's any of your business.
20. Harry: (In the middle of a Quidditch game) So, I'm Keeper…no wait, I'm Seeker…and I have to go after the Bludger, right? Oh, okay,
there it…ow…
21. Dumbledore: No! They're my lemon drops! You can't have them!
McGonagall: I don't want them.
Dumbledore: No! You're supposed to want them!
McGonagall: Well, I don't.
Dumbledore: Pretend!
McGonagall: (sighs) I want your lemon drops Professor…give them to me…
Dumbledore: That's just to bad for you, isn't it?
22. Draco: Easy squeazy lemon peasy...
23. Hermione: Come on, Harry! We can ditch school!
24. Hermione: I'm expelled??? (pause) I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT ALL MY LIFE!!!
25. Pansy: Hey, Draco…I just wanted to tell you…I'm dumping you for Ron.
26. Snape: (Watching a Richard Simmons tape, and jumping around the classroom) Come on! Work that body!
27. Sirius: What should I do for the talent show?
Lupin: I think you'd better take a bath before you…
Sirius: What a great idea! Take a bath! Wash yourself!
28. Harry: (Looks over at TK) Oh… (Looks at Hermione) Yo, Takeru! (Takes him by the shoulders) You know, maybe we can work
something out. You get a wand, I get a D-3. You get an owl, I get a Digimon. You get Hermione, and I get Kari…
29. Ron: (Looks over at Ash) Lucky duck...
30. Draco: All right! Bring on the scratchy woolen shirt!
31. Voldemort: I've been under the Imperius curse my whole life, and I've finally broken free! Now, (cries like a baby) wheres my teddy?!
32. Lupin: (Rushes in on Draco and Hermione kissing, and bites them both) Ah...young blood. (You might not get that one)
33. Dumbledore: (In sunglasses, and red striped shorts) Come with me! I'm going surfing!
34. Hermione: (To insane Dementor) You scare me...
Dementor: Oh, why thank you!
35. Ginny: I put a spell on you, and now you're mine!
Harry: Or not.
36. Fred: I don't feel like doing practical jokes anymore.
George: Me neither...I wish I was more like Percy.
Fred: Yeah, now there's someone to look up to.
George: I'm going to become the best head boy that Hogwrats has ever seen!
Fred: Not if I become Head Boy first!
37. Hermione: (To Three Small Words) I'm a dropout college teen...picture on the TV screen...and the cops are after me...took six
whole hours, and five long days...for them to find me on the run...
38. Lupin: I'm doin this tonight...you're probably gonna run in fright...I was young and got the bite, hey baby come on...
Blaise: You're weird, you know that?
39. Ron: And they say "Theyre so lucky theyre fifth year boys, but they cry, cry, cry in the scary dark whining, 'There are monsters
in my clothes closet! I fell off my bed once again!'"
40. Ron: Oh, leather is sooo me.
41. Pomfrey: I'm not really a nurse...or a witch. I'm a squib from the local insane asylum. But I did play a nurse on TV once!
42. Hermione: (Waving candy around) This is Halloween! This is Halloween!
43. Draco: I just can't wait until the next Care of Magical Creatures class!
44. Ron: I hate money...
45. Ron: Come back to me, Peter! Come back!
46. Snape: Everybody loves the cool whip! Everybody loves the coo-ool whip! Cool whip! Cool whip!
47. Harry: (Kissing Cho) Ah, this is the life.
Cho: You actually dont mind that readers know exactly what youre doing right now?
Harry: (drops Cho, and her head hits the table) What?!
48. Snape: (Snapping his fingers) I'm the baby! Gotta love me!
Voldemort: Hey, you jerk! You stole my motto!
49. Ron: (Gives Harry a thumbs up) Hakuna Matata
Harry: Whatever.
50. Hermione: Where did I put my book on How to go Bad? Eugene!
Eugene: I don't want you to make the same mistake I did!
Hermione: Eugene!
Eugene: Besides, it seems as though you're bad enough already.
Sorry that some of them were really lame. The last 50 will be out soon. I was running out of meterial.
100 Things Harry Potter Characters Will Never Say:
1. Harry: I wanna be a Slytherin!!!
2. Ron: I looove Parvati Patil! Oh, I looove her!
3. Seamus: So, Dean, heard any updates about soccer?
Dean: Soccer?
4. Parvati: Professor Trelawney? A human? All this time I thought she was an oversized dragonfly with specs.
5. Lavender: That's it! I have to stop snooping around like this!
6. Oliver: Hey, dudes! I'm back!
Angelina: Oliver, what are you doing?
Alicia: Why are you back? To watch your old great team win another match?
Oliver: Great team? Heck no! You guys are losers! Losers!
7. Hermione: The truth is… I'm not really a witch! I'm Invader Zim! Ha! Ha! Ha! Gir, put your jets on, and take me out of here!
Ron: Jets on!
8. Snape: Oh yeah! Who let the dogs out?
9. Sinistra: Somewhere out there away from planet Pluto…
10. Draco: Go away, Crabbe! I need to study!
11. Dumbledore: When I grow up…I want to be an old man! Ha! Ha! Ha!!!
12. Harry: What's his name? Oh yeah, baby! Kuzco!!!
13. Hermione: Aren't I lovely?
Ron: Defi-net-ly not!
14. Padma: I am like, gonna be a valley girl when I grow up, and like, have three million cars, and have a husband named Ron, and…
15. Crabbe: I speak!
16. Goyle: I live! Woooo!
17. Hagrid: It's a Blast Ended Skrewt! Ah! Get it away from me!
18. Lee Jordan: That's a foul!
Harry: Aw, pipe down. We all know you smell foul, but keep it to yourself!
19. Draco: Fish, fish, fish!
Harry: What's up with him?
Pansy: He's been hitting his head on a fish tank. Not like it's any of your business.
20. Harry: (In the middle of a Quidditch game) So, I'm Keeper…no wait, I'm Seeker…and I have to go after the Bludger, right? Oh, okay,
there it…ow…
21. Dumbledore: No! They're my lemon drops! You can't have them!
McGonagall: I don't want them.
Dumbledore: No! You're supposed to want them!
McGonagall: Well, I don't.
Dumbledore: Pretend!
McGonagall: (sighs) I want your lemon drops Professor…give them to me…
Dumbledore: That's just to bad for you, isn't it?
22. Draco: Easy squeazy lemon peasy...
23. Hermione: Come on, Harry! We can ditch school!
24. Hermione: I'm expelled??? (pause) I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT ALL MY LIFE!!!
25. Pansy: Hey, Draco…I just wanted to tell you…I'm dumping you for Ron.
26. Snape: (Watching a Richard Simmons tape, and jumping around the classroom) Come on! Work that body!
27. Sirius: What should I do for the talent show?
Lupin: I think you'd better take a bath before you…
Sirius: What a great idea! Take a bath! Wash yourself!
28. Harry: (Looks over at TK) Oh… (Looks at Hermione) Yo, Takeru! (Takes him by the shoulders) You know, maybe we can work
something out. You get a wand, I get a D-3. You get an owl, I get a Digimon. You get Hermione, and I get Kari…
29. Ron: (Looks over at Ash) Lucky duck...
30. Draco: All right! Bring on the scratchy woolen shirt!
31. Voldemort: I've been under the Imperius curse my whole life, and I've finally broken free! Now, (cries like a baby) wheres my teddy?!
32. Lupin: (Rushes in on Draco and Hermione kissing, and bites them both) Ah...young blood. (You might not get that one)
33. Dumbledore: (In sunglasses, and red striped shorts) Come with me! I'm going surfing!
34. Hermione: (To insane Dementor) You scare me...
Dementor: Oh, why thank you!
35. Ginny: I put a spell on you, and now you're mine!
Harry: Or not.
36. Fred: I don't feel like doing practical jokes anymore.
George: Me neither...I wish I was more like Percy.
Fred: Yeah, now there's someone to look up to.
George: I'm going to become the best head boy that Hogwrats has ever seen!
Fred: Not if I become Head Boy first!
37. Hermione: (To Three Small Words) I'm a dropout college teen...picture on the TV screen...and the cops are after me...took six
whole hours, and five long days...for them to find me on the run...
38. Lupin: I'm doin this tonight...you're probably gonna run in fright...I was young and got the bite, hey baby come on...
Blaise: You're weird, you know that?
39. Ron: And they say "Theyre so lucky theyre fifth year boys, but they cry, cry, cry in the scary dark whining, 'There are monsters
in my clothes closet! I fell off my bed once again!'"
40. Ron: Oh, leather is sooo me.
41. Pomfrey: I'm not really a nurse...or a witch. I'm a squib from the local insane asylum. But I did play a nurse on TV once!
42. Hermione: (Waving candy around) This is Halloween! This is Halloween!
43. Draco: I just can't wait until the next Care of Magical Creatures class!
44. Ron: I hate money...
45. Ron: Come back to me, Peter! Come back!
46. Snape: Everybody loves the cool whip! Everybody loves the coo-ool whip! Cool whip! Cool whip!
47. Harry: (Kissing Cho) Ah, this is the life.
Cho: You actually dont mind that readers know exactly what youre doing right now?
Harry: (drops Cho, and her head hits the table) What?!
48. Snape: (Snapping his fingers) I'm the baby! Gotta love me!
Voldemort: Hey, you jerk! You stole my motto!
49. Ron: (Gives Harry a thumbs up) Hakuna Matata
Harry: Whatever.
50. Hermione: Where did I put my book on How to go Bad? Eugene!
Eugene: I don't want you to make the same mistake I did!
Hermione: Eugene!
Eugene: Besides, it seems as though you're bad enough already.
Sorry that some of them were really lame. The last 50 will be out soon. I was running out of meterial.
