AUTHOR: Goddess Isa
EMAIL: goddessisa@aol.com
SUMMARY: Don't ask, just read
SPOILER: The Wish, S4 rumours
DISTRIBUTION: Sandee, of course - My site - http://planetslaythis.homestead.com - Crystal and Butterfly if they want it - A Soul's Redemption - Anyone else - sure, just email me & lmk where it's going - I like seeing my name in print =)
FEEDBACK: Please, I'd hate to have to Slay for it. =P
RATING: TV-PG
DISCLAIMER: I don't own these characters, Joss Whedon does. If he ever decides to give them to me, that would be nice. =)
AUTHOR'S NOTES: I hate to say it, but I just found this and don't remember writing it so it's an extra piece in my Spike/Anya series and it's pure fluff. For some reason, this series was like the most exciting thing I wrote this year. I put a ton of work into it and I *really* appreciate feedback on it.
"I cannot believe you talked me into this," Anya grunted. Buffy smirked as they entered the classroom.
"Look at the bright side," she said teasingly. "Now you have something to do while Spike's sleeping."
Anya snorted. "Needing the silver lining here."
"As a history major, you'll never have to take math." Buffy offered. "Hopefully," she offered.
"Still unconvinced." Anya took her seat in the front row and sighed. "Why are desks created for right handed people?"
"You're right handed," Buffy pointed out. "So why do you care?"
"I know people who aren't." she sighed. "I hate this already."
"It'll get better."
"And if it doesn't?" the room began filling up.
Buffy didn't have an answer for her on that one.
*****
That night, Buffy went on patrol with Xander and Willow went out with Oz. Anya had been planning a romantic night with Spike when she noticed her English book and remembered her assignment. She snorted at the book as though it would care. "I read Othello once." she said aloud. "It was seven hundred years ago, but I think I can manage with CliffsNotes."
She stuffed her books under the bed and combed through her hair. She was choosing between two different lipsticks that both belonged to Buffy when she heard a knock at the door. She applied the Haphazard shade in a hurry and opened the door. She frowned when she saw Willow.
"Nice to see you too." Willow said as she pushed past her.
"I thought you were going out with Oz."
"Well, I was, but I've got that assignment for creative writing and it's due in two days so I figured I'd better get started on it."
Anya felt like the wind had been knocked out of her sails. "That's not due for like thirty hours."
"Yeah, I know," she sat on her bed and opened her laptop. "Did you write everything in your assignment book?"
Sometimes, Anya wanted to hit Willow with a pillow. She was as perfect, academically, anyway, as you could get, and it was starting to bug her. "Will, I don't *have* an assignment book."
"Oh. You can borrow mine if you ever need to."
"Thanks."
"You know what?" she closed her laptop and unplugged the AC adapter. "I think I'm gonna go watch the Dingoes practice. I can start my paper there."
"Won't the music be distracting?"
"Are you kidding? I have to wear like super-strong headphones just to be able to be in the room with the band when they practice, I'll have no problem studying. You can't hear a thing with those headphones on."
"So it's an all or nothing type of thing?" Anya assumed.
"Yeah. I can't hear but Oz says it's nice to have me there, so," she gathered her stuff and waved. "Bye."
"Bye."
Willow peeked her head back in. "You know you can use Buffy's new iBook if you need to, and my assignment book is on my desk."
"Thanks."
Willow shut the door and Anya flung herself on her bed, pouting. There was only one way she'd manage to get all her assignments - which she didn't really care about - done and still spend time with Spike.
Sighing, she reached for the phone.
*****
"I haven't done any kind of homework in a hundred years." he grumbled. "And when I did have homework, it meant *working* at *home*, not this bullshit."
"Point taken." She laid out the CliffsNotes she's borrowed from Buffy.
"Othello?" he demanded.
"First time for everything." she told him. She grabbed Willow's assignment book and munched on Cheez-Its as she read aloud. "Write about someone in your life who has changed how you look at everything around you. Change all names and facts that could reveal who the people you're referring to are, but don't take liberties with the storyline. The best stories will be read aloud in class."
"Don't write anything about Ears," Spike said.
"Don't you write about Angel," she replied. She wanted to tell him not to write about Dru, either, but she didn't wanna push it. And besides, as nuts as Drusilla was, he'd been in love with her for years and vice versa, in her own psychotic way.
"Anya?" he asked. "Can we go get a bite to eat?"
"What did you have in mind? Chinese?"
He shrugged. "What do I care if he's Chinese or not?!"
Anya sighed and began working.
*****
"Miss Emerson?"
Anya could barely keep her eyes open as she looked up at her professor.
"Will you be sleeping through class today?"
She shook her head. "I'm sorry, Mr. Wood. I'm still trying to adjust to classes, and--
"We're all adjusting, Miss Emerson." he practically sneered at her. "I was going to read your paper to the class myself, for your anonymity, but you seem to have no respect for me, or my class, so I feel I should show you the same courtesy and have you read it yourself."
Anya gulped. Buffy felt bad for her, but everyone else watched Anya with wide eyes as she stood up. She walked up to the professor and took her paper from him, glaring at him as she did so.
She cleared her throat and began reading. "When he walked into my life, I was spiraling. The spiral had been going downward for what felt like a thousand years." she shared a small smile with Buffy.
"I was running out of places to hide, I was lost, tired, and alone. Then he came along.
Through the darkness, a ray of light shining brightly all around me. He inspired me to value my friends and let the demons within die together. He forced me to look at my life as though it had meaning. He made me think I might be important to someone other than myself.
He opened my eyes to the possibilities that lie before me, made me want something more.
He supported me when I took a big plunge and helped me up when I fell.
He's all I'll ever need, and all I'll ever want.
He's my miracle."
The class, miraculously, applauded. With a C grade and a spinning head, Anya returned to her seat.
"Way to go," Buffy whispered.
Anya could only manage a weak smile. Reading her story aloud had made her think just how much she care for Spike, and the emotions were starting to scare her.
*****
Anya finished her classes as quickly as possible and went home to the empty apartment she shared with Buffy and Willow. She didn't bother turning on any lights, she wanted to be in the darkness. The soft black light Willow kept above the door for aid in certain spells brought a fluorescent glow over the entire room as she tumbled into bed. She tossed her clothes aside and searched through her sheets for her Red Wings jersey, a clearance buy she'd gotten after the Rings lost the Stanley Cup. She was lying with the covers bunched up at her feet when she saw something floating through the sky. She turned the lamp by her bed on and saw that the mattress was covered in rose petals and every time she moved, she threw them upwards. A stack of neatly written papers were underneath her pillow, a single chocolate heart on top of them. She ate the candy and then began reading the old-style handwriting.
//
Some people say you only meet one person who'll dramatically change your life. Actually, this assignment would say that there's only one person who'll change your life. I have to disagree.
I've been lucky enough to have three strong, domineering people guiding me in my lifetime. The first one killed me, more or less. The second tried to destroy me and almost did. The third is my savior.
I live in the dark. I relish the moon, the sanctuary it can provide. She made me come out and see the sunlight. She took away all of my fears and made me feel twenty years old again. I can't tell you the last time I felt that way.
I'm not a writer, so I don't know if this even makes sense. I'm not a good person, I'm a monster and that's all there is to it. Yet again, she's got me doing new things, making changes.
Starting over in a new life together, I realize now all I was missing before I met her. I wanted her in my life so deeply that I became a new man just for her.
\\
Anya arrived at the last page and blinked away tears before reading it.
//
My beloved Anya,
Sorry I was such a prick the other night. And I'm sorry I was asleep when you woke up. I watched you after you fell asleep for hours and I wanted to stay up to see you before you left for class, but I just couldn't manage it. I guess it's the lack of human blood lately, it's making me sort of weak.
I wrote this while lying on your bed beside you, listening to the music of your breathing and smelling the sweet roses that make me think of you.
It's pure crap, I know, but I tried for you, pet. Really, I did.
I'll see you tonight, when you lease expect it.
Spike
\\
Anya put the papers in between the pages of her diary, then she put it away under her top sheet. She fell asleep with the scent of rose petals filling her dreams of Spike.
