Hello! I'm baaaaaack! Thank you to all those who are reviewing and enjoying my little contest. Yes, I try hard to keep the Gundam people in character. I don't like it either when people make them too OOC. Wow! This fic is getting a lot longer than I thought. I just keep coming up with new ways to torture the Gundam peeps.




WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING This part has a slight spoiler about Treize. For those who haven't seen the whole series yet, unless they believe that they've already been spoiled, don't read this. Then again, to help you from skipping a whole part and getting confused in chapter nine, avoid the part where Wufei meets up with Treize and you should be fine.

I don't own the Gundam Wing thing.

Part Eight: Quatre the Pirate

******Warning! Beware of random flying coconuts. You must wear a safety helmet beyond this point.*******

What have I done? What started out as a quiet little contest has turned into a war! Coconuts are flying everywhere and the sounds of battle are ringing in the ears. The entire main cast of Gundam Wing has gone insane and it's all because of me. Man I'm good!^__^

:::Lady Une and Treize are on a high platform in a palm tree. Noin and Zechs are on another with large piles of coconuts by their side:::

Lady Une: Here they come! Prepare to fire!

Duo in his warrior paint and camouflage charging through the hot sand: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!! *bloodthirsty warrior cry*

Une: Ready...Aim...Fire!

:::Coconuts come pouring down on the g-boys and gals:::

Hilde: Where's Noin? Comparing me to her!? I'll show everyone which one's be--" *a flying coconut smashes against her head*(konk!)

Duo: Hilde?

Hilde: +.+

Duo: Oh no...they got her! *shakes his fist* Curse you OZ!!

:::Trowa and Quatre have finished building a wall of sand to protect themselves from the coconuts and are throwing their coconuts with the help of a slingshot ingeniously made by the blonde Arab:::

Trowa: We're running short of ammo!

Quatre: Don't worry, I sent Cathy to bring more supplies.

Trowa: Quatre! Look out!

Quatre: Wha--(KONK!)

Trowa: it's a coconut... o.o

:::He starts smacking Quatre in the face, trying to make him gain back consciousness:::

Trowa: Quatre, wake up!

Quatre: ...iiii've got a loveeely bunch o' cocooonuts...

Trowa: Snap out of it!

:::All of a sudden, Quatre gets that strange crazy look (the famous Wing Zero look) and with one eye closed growls:::

Quatre: Grrr! Arrrggh, matey!

Trowa: ?.? Quatre?

Quatre: The treasure! Where be th' treasure?!

Trowa: Quatre, why are you talking like that?

Quatre: Winner's the name! Captain Winner! And if ye don't tell me where my treasure be, I'll 'ave to slit ye throat!

Trowa: oh no... (O.O)

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:::Meanwhile, Wufei has skillfuly dodged the coconuts and begins to climb up Treize and Une's palm tree. When he reaches the platform, he finds that Lady Une is waiting for him:::

Une: To get to Mr.Treize, you have to go through me.

Wufei: Step aside woman! Your boss and I have something to finish.

Une: I don't think so.

:::Wufei swings his leg to knock her down but the platform is really small, so instead Une falls off the palm tree. Wufei grinned with satisfaction, Treize was now all to himself:::

:::On Treize's platform:::

Wufei: Treize, I must kill you.

Treize: And why is that?

Wufei: Because you were supposed to die in episode 48 and yet you somehow ended up in this fic. I must correct the wrongdoings of the insane author in the name of...!

Treize: I know...justice, am I right?

Wufei: No, Nataku.

Treize: *relieved* Thank God. Very well then, what shall we fight with? You don't have a weapon and I left my sword at home.

Wufei: Hmmm..never thought of that. We should have some sort of competition.

Treize: How about an arm wrestling match?

Wufei: No, something more challenging.

Treize: *thinks for a moment* I know! Who can drink from the most coconuts.

Wufei: Nah, coconuts make me break out into hives.

Treize: Hmmm...

Wufei: Hmmmm... maybe we should go somewhere for inspiration.

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:::Lady Une finally wakes up to find herself sitting up against a wall tied up. When she looked to her side, Zechs and Noin were in the same situation. She soon realizes that they're on the boat that they used to get to Bear Island:::

Une: What the ?

Quatre: Arrrrrggghhh!!

Une: *.O It's gundam pilot four.

Noin: And he's gone completely nuts!

:::Quatre or *ahem* Captain Winner somehow found a pirate outfit , which he is now wearing instead of the grasskirt he was in earlier::: Ahhh..the land lover finally awakens.

Zechs: What do you want, kid?

Quatre: You know 'xactly what Captain Winner be searchin' fer! The treasure of Pinkbeard!

Une: That's what we're looking for right now. At least, we were until once again you gundam pilots had to spoil everything for us. Where are those other kids anyway?

Quatre: Right 'ere!

:::He points out the gundam boys and gals tied up in different areas. Duo and Sally are tied up in chairs back to back with eachother. Trowa's hanging on the ceiling by his feet, Hilde's tied up and still unconscious on the coach (it's a big boat), and Relena is tied up against the fridge with Cathy.:::

Une: Are you mad?

Captain Winner: Tell me where the treasure is or I'll make ye walk the plank and feed ye to the sharks.

Zechs: Even if I knew exactly where it was, I wouldn't tell you.

Winner: Then give me th' map!

Zechs: No.

Heero: Zechs.

Zechs: What?!

Heero: *sees Zechs' frizzled hair and trying hard to keep a straight face* Give him the map.

Zechs: I'm not taking orders from anybody. Not from a crazed boy wearing an eyepatch-and especially not you.

Heero: If you don't tell him where the map is, then I'll have to tell everyone your secret.

Zechs: What secret?

Heero: You know. The one you've been hiding from everybody, including all the GW fans. Your deepest, darkest secret...

Zechs: No!! You wouldn't!!

Heero: Try me.

Zechs: Oh alright! The map is hidden in the stuffed turkey on the third shelf of the fridge.

Winner: Arrrggh! I knew ye would giv' in somehow.

:::He opens the fridge, reaches into the turkey, and sure enough pulls out an old map. Cackling with glee, the crazed Quatre runs out to claim his treasure:::

Duo: Well, good to see he's happy. Now quick--Sally--cut the ropes so we can get out of here!

Sally: How?

Duo: I don't know. Use one of your special guerrila tactics.

Heero: Don't worry, I got a knife.

:::He breaks free and goes to untie Trowa first:::

Heero: You okay, Trowa?

Trowa: *face as red as a tomato* Besides the fact that 90% of my blood has rushed to my head and everything's upside down, I'm fine.

Noin: Zechs, what's your secret?

Zechs: Nothing.

Noin: Relena?

Relena: Whatever it is, I don't know.

Duo: Well, while we're on the subject of your brother I'd like to know-Zechs, what the heck happened to you?

Zechs: None of your business.

Duo: *snickering, trying to control himself from busting out laughing* You look like an old afghan hound a friend of mine used to have.

Zechs: You shut up.

Relena: *trying to change the subject* What should we do with Hilde? We can't just leave her here.

Trowa: I'll take care of her.

Cathy: Come on, you guys. Let's get out of here.

Une: Wait! You're not going to just leave us here?

Hilde: That's what we're all planning.

Noin: But with Treize and Wufei out there and that crazy kid running around, you'll need all the help you can get.

Sally: She's right you know.

Heero: Fine.

:::He quickly cuts through their ropes and the new allies make their escape, preparing themselves for the unkown obstacles ahead:::


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And that's it for now. Next chapter will be the climax of this crazy fic. Now remember. Review, Review!!

Duo: Hey Zechs! Did you hear that? Next up, it's the "mane" event. *laughs histerically*

Zechs: -__-