TITLE: Will The Change Come While We're Waiting?
AUTHOR: Goddess Isa
EMAIL: goddessisa@aol.com
SUMMARY: A very sad goodbye between three best friends
SPOILER: This Year's Girl, but it's also my little world as well
DISTRIBUTION: Sandee, of course - My site - http://planetslaythis.homestead.com - Crystal and Butterfly if they want it - A Soul's Redemption - Anyone else - sure, just email me & lmk where it's going - I like seeing my name in print =)
RATING: TV-PG
DISCLAIMER: The way I feel about Joss is verrrrrry special. I love him AND I hate him. Jerkwad. The song belongs to Goddess Sarah MacLachlan, who inspires me on a daily basis.



"So this is it, huh?" Xander asked as he shut the trunk to his car.

Buffy nodded. "I guess."

"We're gonna miss you." Willow said. "So much."

"I know," Buffy wiped a tear from her eye. "I can't stay here anymore though. You know that I can't."

Xander shrugged. "I stay."

"Anya's here," she pointed out. "And you didn't just..." she paused, letting her mind wander for a moment. She shook her head, trying to push the memories of the past month out of her head. "You guys should stay here, continue your lives. Find happiness, even if it's with a crazy blonde vampire," she smiled at Willow. "Or a former demon."

"Who is old enough to be my grandmother with more greats than I can state." he smirked.

"Love is blind." Buffy stated. "It really is."

"You and Angel are perfect for each other though." Willow said sincerely.

"I really think we are," Buffy leaned against the hood of the car. "I wasn't going to admit it to myself, but I can't keep lying about it. I just think..." she let her mind trail over the past, even though she swore she wasn't going to.

The night Faith tried to turn Angel back into Angelus was the first picture in her mind. She blinked it away and thought about the first time she faced off with Faith at the university, the cuts she got jumping through the window to take Faith on.

Her mind seemed to play the entire ordeal from then on in slow motion. Feeling that device of Faith's switch their souls, taking the punch and going down, waking up in a cop car.

The shackles, the cuffs, the horrible things the cops said to her. The tiny cell she lived in for three weeks, the hurt Faith caused her friends and ultimately, her mother.

She couldn't imagine how it must've felt for her mom to think her own daughter was murdering her.

"She had to know," she whispered, barely loud enough for her friends to hear.

"She knew, Buffy." Willow said.

"She had to know, Buff." Xander added. "There's no way she would've thought it was you. She knew better."

Buffy shrugged. "It's too bad. I never would've dreamed one of us would really have to die in order for the transformation to reverse itself. I know I've said it a thousand times and it wasn't my thought, but I am *so* sorry for everything my body did to you guys. I can't ever say this enough."

"It wasn't your fault." Willow put an arm around her.

"I owe you guys apologies too," Xander said. "I sort of helped her and--"

"Enough!" Buffy said. "If anyone should be sorry, it's me, and we've already gone there. We should just change the subject. I need to get going soon and we shouldn't spend our last few minutes together bickering like children."

"I don't think Leia will mind," Xander smirked.

Buffy rubbed her stomach. It was a completely miracle that her pregnancy had survived everything she'd been through over the past few months. "I hope not. She's gonna be one of the Gang, you know."

"We wouldn't have it any other way." Willow smiled.

"Angel know he's gonna be a daddy yet?" Xander asked.

Buffy shook her head. "I haven't talked to him since the day I walked out of there pretending not to know what we'd shared. I don't think I can stand telling him about this until I'm faced with it."

"You're wearing a small dress." Xander smiled. "He'll know instantly."

"That was the point." she leaned her head back, letting the sun cover her for a moment. "I'm gonna miss you guys." she patted her stomach. "We both are."

"The distance isn't gonna matter." Willow said. "Look at Giles and Olivia. They live in different countries!"

"It's not gonna be easy," Xander allowed. "But we'll deal. I mean, I like driving and it's a scenic trip to Los Angeles, so I'll be around a lot."

Buffy smirked. "You just wanna take Anya shopping."

"No, Anya wants to take me shopping." he corrected. "Maybe you can show her the good malls."

"All malls are good to a girl." Buffy sniffled and rubbed her eyes. "I'm gonna miss you guys *so* much. I swore I wouldn't cry until I got out on the road but look at me. I'm so relieved to be getting out of here, but at the same time, I hate it. Everything's gonna change."

"Maybe it's all for the best," Willow suggested.

"I guess we'll find out," Buffy shrugged.


//Make me a witness

Take me out

Out of darkness

Out of doubt


I won't weigh you down

With good intention

Won't make fire out of clay

Or other inventions


Will we burn in Heaven

Like we do down here

Will the change come

While we're waiting

Everyone is waiting


And when we're done

Soul searching

As we carried the weight

And died for the cause


Is misery

Made beautiful

Right before our eyes

Will mercy be revealed

Or blind us where we stand


Will we burn in Heaven

Like we do down here

Will the change come while we're waiting

Everyone is waiting\\


"Are you scared?" Willow finally whispered, afraid to hear the answer.

Buffy thought about Evil Riley and his death at Faith's hands, about losing her mother and about the child she carried that would be named Leia Joyce. "No, she decided. "I can handle whatever happens."

"If it doesn't work out, you can always come back to Sunnydale." Xander said. "We'll be here."

"No, I can't." Buffy replied. "And that's okay. I'm all right with it. LA's my home town and I do miss it. No one there can replace you guys, but it's a distance I know we can handle."

"Are you gonna be okay on that long trip?" Willow asked. "It's quite a distance and with the baby--"

"I'll be fine." Buffy said.

"Just in case," Xander pulled a cooler out from behind the bushes. "It's full of all your favorite things."

"And a last meal for us." Willow smirked. She put a blanket over the hood of Xander's car and they sat down. Xander pulled three oranges and a can of whipped cream out of the cooler and Buffy cracked up.

"I cannot believe you guys remember this." she started to peel one. "It's been years."

"The night we had our first group Slaying," Willow said. "We went to 7-11 and you bought oranges and a can of Redi-Whip."

"We thought you were nuts." Xander laughed. "And then we tasted it."

Buffy handed each of her friends a peeled slice and they passed the can around, coating the fruit with the whipped cream.

"It's a delicacy only special people can appreciate." Willow said with a smile.

They finished their snack and Buffy glanced at her watch. "I should get going. It's getting late and I don't want you guys to miss your first country line dancing lesson."

"Oh, I'm so looking forward to it." Xander said sarcastically. "I guess I can't go though, 'cause Anya--"

"Is speeding down the street on a motorcycle." Buffy laughed.
The former demon wasn't wearing a helmet and her short hair blew in the wind as she pulled into the driveway and tossed her bike carelessly onto the grass. She ran up to Xander and put a handcuff around his right wrist, locking it. The other was on her left wrist.

"What are you doing?" Xander asked, trying not to panic.

"I don't want you to get away." she looked at Buffy. "I didn't want you to take him to LA."

"I'm just borrowing his car," Buffy slid off the hood and folded up the blanket, handing it to Willow. "I'll have Cordelia and Wesley return this tomorrow."

"I still can't believe they're moving back here." Xander said.

"Makes two of us." Buffy started to cry again, knowing she really had to say goodbye this time.

"Come on Anya," Xander tugged on her. "Help me put the cooler in the car."

While they were doing that, Buffy and Willow hugged tightly.

"I am gonna miss you so much," Willow whispered. "I didn't want to cry either and now I'm bawling."

Buffy smiled in between sniffles. "It's only a week 'till you guys visit."

"It feels like forever. I'm not gonna be able to just pop over and see you now."

"I know, but we'll get used to it." Buffy said. "We don't have any other choice."

"Take care of Leia," Willow ordered. "Don't let Angel get too.....you know." she blushed.

Buffy laughed loudly. "We'll be fine. I love you."

"You too," Willow mumbled. Xander moved over to hug Buffy but Anya jerked him back and eyed him.

"I won't let you free if you kiss her," she said flatly. "Ever."

"Take care, Buff." he gave her a hug and stood back with the two girls. Buffy got into his car, started the engine and pulled away. They watched her go and prayed for her to never return and to come back soon at the same time.