AUTHOR: Goddess Isa
EMAIL: goddessisa@aol.com
SUMMARY: I don't think we saw enough of Angel in this episode, so the Slayer pays him a visit after her wonderful senior year Homecoming.
RATING: TV-PG
SPOILERS: Homecoming
DISCLAIMER: I do not own these wonderful characters created by Joss Whedon. If I did, I would be in Hawaii on vacation instead of stuck here in three feet of snow at a computer. *smirk*
Buffy hurled her purse at the candles on the floor. Angel sped over and used one of his black shirts to beat out the first before it really got a chance to get going. Buffy smiled at him appreciatively. "Sorry. Anger spill."
He smiled back. "I hope this wasn't too expensive," he held up the scorched purse. "It's ruined."
"It wasn't, but the lipstick inside was. Oh well." she threw one of her high heels across the room to a candle free area. "Some Homecoming. My senior year is turning out to be a real winner. What a great start I'm off on."
Angel reached for her hand. "It'll get better. I promise."
"How? I missed my senior pictures, I have no extra curricular activities that don't include killing the undead and under personal description it's gonna say 'Bitchy Vampire Slayer'."
Angel laughed, something Buffy had missed. She cherished the sound of it.
"I'm gonna be lucky to even graduate, the way I've been missing classes." she paused, playing with the broken strap on her dress. "When - if - I graduate, will you be there?"
Angel paused. Weren't graduations always during the day? "If--"
"It's at eight p.m.," she said as though she read his mind. "And it's indoors. The sun should be setting, but....."
"Okay," he said quietly.
Her eyes widened. "Okay?"
"I'll come."
"You will?"
"I will."
Buffy smiled and kept on playing with her strap. It was all she could do to keep from hugging him. "I'm happy. I'm never happy."
"I've seen you happy."
Buffy knew what Angel was referring to. She'd seen him happy that night too. She recalled the way he'd hold her while they were making love, the look in his eyes. She missed the feeling of his arms on her body, his lips on hers. Sometimes when she laid in bed thinking of him, she couldn't help but wonder if he thought about her that way. If he longed to have her naked body next to his the way she did. She glanced at him, and as if he read her mind, the look in his eyes told her that he did.
Buffy stood up and brushed the bottom of her ruined dress off. "I should go." She reached for her burnt excuse for a handbag and walked over to retrieve her shoe.
"So this is it huh?" Angel asked.
Buffy hooked her shoe and looked up at him, confused.
"You run away whenever you start to feel something."
Buffy glared at him. "I'm not running away. I'm going home. It's late."
"I love you, Buffy."
"Don't."
"Why? The truth hurts, I know. That doesn't mean we can run away from it. It won't go away, even if we ignore it."
She willed herself not to run into his arms. She hated it when he was right. "I'm not running. I'm.....I'm....It hurts too much to be so close to you, and not be touching you. Kissing you. Holding you. Making love to you."
"Buffy...."
"I know, kissing you isn't going take away your soul, but if I kiss you, I can't stop. I know I can't. I'm gonna go through my entire life with this pain. I need you Angel. And what we have right now isn't enough, it's never going to be enough. But it has to be." she looked at him one last time. "Anything more will kill us both." and then she walked away.
