Prompt #63: When they left he was a baby, but he didn't forget about his "Livvie". From bedtime stories about his favorite hero, to secret phone calls behind his parent's back... How did a move across the pond affect Eli's relationship with Olivia? How will he react to seeing her again after a decade? How will the loss of his mother affect the relationship he has with Olivia?


His Livvie

~oOo~

"My Livvie." Stabler blue eyes glare at their father and cling tighter around his partner's neck.

She laughs and Elliot sighs. "Yes, that's your Livvie," he agrees and reaches again for the toddler, who buries his face in her neck. "And I'm your Daddy and it's time for us to go home now or Mommy's going to kill me."

Eli whines when Olivia pulls him away from her neck and completes the handoff to Elliot. He had to bring Eli into the precinct this afternoon and he immediately attached himself to Liv once he saw her. She's definitely his favorite person. Like father, like son, he thinks.

"Livvie come too?" Eli asks as they walk towards the doors together.

"Not tonight, sweetheart," she says, leaning over to kiss him on the forehead. "I'll see you again soon though."

Except Elliot's world falls apart a week later and Olivia's calls go unanswered.

~oOo~

They've been in Rome a little over three months when his siblings come to visit for the first time. Eli's been practically vibrating beside him in the airport as they wait to see them come through the gate. Once they do, it's a chaotic mix of hugs and exclamations, but all too quickly Eli deflates.

"What's the matter?" Elliot asks, bending down to look his son in the eye.

Eli pouts. "You said everyone was coming to visit."

"Yeah, and they're all here," he says, not seeing the problem.

Tears build up in Eli's eyes, a sign of an oncoming tantrum. "Where's Livvie?" he asks. "I want my Livvie."

They're in a crowded airport, but he swears he can hear a pin drop. He can definitely feel his wife glaring holes in the back of his head. His son is beginning to cry, and he has no idea what to tell him. He's sure she never mentioned Liv coming to visit and he knows he didn't, but Eli heard family and assumed that meant Liv. He's been trying so hard to forget her, he didn't realize how much Eli missed her.

Kathleen to the rescue.

"Oh Eli," she says, swooping him up into a hug and placing him on her hip. "Livvie couldn't come today, but she loves you and misses you very much. As a matter of fact," Kathleen uses her free hand to reach into her tote bag and pull out a small, wrapped package, "she gave me this to give to you."

"Really?" Eli's face lights up.

"Really really," Kathleen confirms.

He rips it open to reveal a small stuffed dog, which he immediately clutches to his chest. Crisis averted for now, the family retrieves their bags and makes their way out of the airport. He's not looking forward to the conversation he's sure Kathy has planned for the night, but Eli's animated conversation with his stuffed new best friend makes it worth it.

~oOo~

Eli is seven now and almost too old for bedtime stories. However, his mom is out with friends tonight and his dad is the one in charge, and he tells the best stories.

"What do you want to hear tonight? A chapter of Harry Potter?" his dad asks as he tucks him in. Eli has Puppy tucked firmly under his arm. Not the most imaginative of names, but he was four when he got it from Livvie and the name has stuck ever since.

"Can you tell me a story instead? Maybe one about Livvie?" Eli makes sure to give his dad his best puppy dog eyes.

He only gets stories about Livvie when his mom is away. He's not too sure why Mom makes a weird face whenever he asks about her. It's almost like she doesn't like Livvie and that's insane. Either way, he only talks about her to his siblings or Dad.

Dad smiles and it almost looks a little sad. He must miss her too. He hasn't seen Livvie in forever and she's his dad's best friend. Keeping New York safe must be a busy job.

"Have I ever told you about the day you were born?" his dad asks.

"Daddddd, I want a story about Livvie," he protests.

"This is a story about Livvie," his dad says. "It's also a story about you and Mom. You know Livvie was the first one to hold you when you were born?"

"She was?"

"She was," he confirms. "She saved you both that day."

Eli falls asleep to what he later finds out was a true story, but also highly edited to be child appropriate.

~oOo~

Eli gets more freedom in Rome than his siblings did in NYC. That's what they tell him anyway. He's nine when he's allowed to stay at home by himself. He's also got his own cell phone with an international calling plan. He's planned this out very carefully and he still has about an hour before anyone gets home. That should be more than enough time. He enters the number and double checks it matches what Google tells him. The phone rings and rings and Eli frowns, preparing to leave a voicemail.

Until, finally, "Benson."

Success! "Hi, Livvie!"

Silence. He looks at the phone, but it says he's still connected. "Livvie? Are you there?"

"Eli? Is that you?"

"Yes! Livvie, I miss you."

"I miss you too, sweetheart," she says. "Are you okay? This is showing up as an international number. Are your Mom or Dad nearby?"

"They won't be home for another hour," he says, frowning. "Didn't Dad tell you we live in Rome?" That would explain why he hasn't seen her in years.

"Oh," she sounds a little choked, "silly me, I forgot about that."

"Are you okay?" he asks. "Is it okay that I called you?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. My drink just went down the wrong pipe. You can always talk to me, sweetheart. What have you been up to?"

He tells her all about his adventures in school and how he made the winning goal for his soccer team last week. After that, he calls or texts her whenever he gets a chance.

A week or two later, he overhears Mom ask Dad if he ever talks to Liv and Dad says he doesn't. He decides he probably shouldn't mention that he still does.

~oOo~

Their first visit to NYC comes when he's ten. Mo is getting married and it's the most boring summer of his life. He gets dragged to fittings for a tux that itches and meets Carl's relatives, who like to pinch his cheeks and tell him how cute he is. He gets to carry the rings, which is cool, but Carl's niece is the flower girl, and she won't leave him alone whenever they're in the same room.

Kathleen proves that she's worthy of her favorite sibling title when she says that she and Eli have plans after the latest fitting and pulls him out of the room before anyone can protest.

"We have plans?" he asks after they climb into a cab.

"We do," she says, texting someone before looking up at him. "I mean, I can take you back to hang out with Kaylee if you want."

"Please don't," he groans. "Mom keeps saying it's cute and asking if she's my girlfriend now."

"Well, I have just the thing to cheer you up," she says as the cab comes to a stop. "I heard you still talk to our favorite person. I'm assuming you haven't told the parents that?"

"No," he says, climbing out of the car. "Are you going to tell them?"

"I won't tell them, as long as you don't tell them I do too. Which brings me to our plans today." She points to the window of the diner beside them.

"Livvie!" Eli dashes inside as she waves to them. He throws himself at her and she catches him in a tight hug.

"Hi, Eli!" She squeezes him once more then pulls back to look at him. "Look at you, you're getting so tall!"

"I'm the tallest in my class!" he confirms, then notices the little boy staring at him beside Olivia. "Is that Noah?"

"Yes," she says, turning to the little boy. "Noah, this is Eli, Kathleen's little brother. You've talked to him on the phone before, remember?"

"Hi," Noah says, softly, before turning and burying his head into Livvie's arm.

"He's going through a shy phase right now," she says. "Sit down, tell me all about the wedding plans."

He gets to spend the rest of the day with Kathleen, Olivia, and Noah. It's the best day of the summer.

~oOo~

It continues on like that, face-timing with Livvie and Noah whenever his parents aren't around. Sneaking off with Kathleen to visit them on their rare trips back to the city. They never talk about his parents, and he never mentions Livvie to them. Noah feels more and more like his little brother and Livvie is more like a second mom than an aunt.

"Eli." His dad knocks on his door one night. It's open, but he still waits for Eli to see him before he comes in.

"What's up?" he asks as he pulls off his headphones.

"Your Mom and I are going to go to NYC in a few weeks," he says. "My old partner, she's getting an award and we're going to the ceremony. It'll only be a few days, but you'll stay with Josh's family while we're gone."

"You can't go see Livvie without me! That's not fair," he protests, and his dad looks surprised.

"I didn't think you'd remember her to be honest," his dad says. "You haven't talked about her in a long time."

"Mom kept acting weird whenever I did and then I realized you looked sad when I mentioned her. What's that all about?"

"It's complicated. I know, I know." He waves his hand when Eli groans. "You hate that answer. It's the best one I have at the moment. I wasn't the best friend to her when I left so I'm hoping she'll actually talk to me when I see her."

"I bet she will if I'm with you."

"Probably." His dad wipes his hand over his face. "Look, you're still in school and you can't miss that many days this close to the end of the year. Let me see how it goes and if I come back alive, I'll bring you next time to butter her up. Maybe over the summer break."

"Deal," he agrees.

He sees them off at the airport, thinking about getting to see Livvie in a few months. He doesn't realize it's the last time he'll see his mom.

~oOo~

After that, Livvie is just there. His dad is spiraling, Eli feels like he's drowning, and Kathleen comes up with an intervention like that will solve all the world's problems.

"I love you," his dad says, staring straight at Livvie and suddenly that face his mom would make makes a whole lot more sense. "I love all of you," he adds, but the damage is already done.

Eli shows up at her apartment later. She opens the door and looks like she's been expecting him. Her arms open for a hug and he gratefully falls into them. He wants to pretend things are normal for a few more moments.

"Did you know?" he asks later, curled up in one of her chairs with a mug of hot chocolate. "Is that why we left? Why Mom was so weird? Did you—" his voice cuts out and the tears well up again.

"No," she says, quietly. "We never did anything, Eli. I would never do that to your family."

He believes her. Livvie has never lied to him, not about the important things anyway.

"Does your Dad know where you are?"

He shakes his head. "I'm staying with Mo now. I can't…I can't be in that apartment while he's like this."

"Why don't I text her and tell her you're staying here tonight? Noah and I are planning a lazy day of pizza and movies and you know he'd love to see you."

"You don't mind?"

"You're always welcome here, Eli. Always."

~oOo~

Much of the summer is spent at Livvie's house, but once school starts back the visits start to dwindle. He's tested high enough to be placed as a sophomore, even though with his late birthday he should be a freshman. He's also the only sophomore on the Varsity soccer team. He's heard about peer pressure all his life, but he just needs things to slow down and when one of the other boys offers him a Xanax, he takes it.

His mom would be horrified, but Dad is undercover and doesn't notice anything. Grandma notices more than she's given credit for, but with her own track record, no one listens to her. He gets away with taking her pills until Livvie stops by one night when his dad makes a rare appearance. She knocks on the door to the bathroom and he panics, shoving some of the pills back into bottles and some of them into his pockets. He lets her in and grabs his backpack and sprints for the door. He can hear his dad shouting for him, but he keeps moving. He'll have to talk to him eventually, but maybe he'll go back to work before Eli comes home.

The next day, Eli is on house arrest. His dad's wired the house with cameras and now he can't do anything but go to school, soccer and home. He's lucky he was able to keep soccer, but it was a close call.

"Eli?" Livvie's standing in the doorway to his room. She looks worried, and a small part of him hates that he put that look on her face, but he shoves that part deep inside him.

"I hope you're happy," he says. "I've got Big Brother spying on me 24/7 now."

"Eli, I'm worried about you, sweetheart." She enters his room and sits on his bed.

"Sure, come on in," he mutters.

"Eli—" she starts.

"No!" He leaps up from the bed. "No, you don't get to act all concerned! You're not my mom! My mom is dead! She's dead because Dad wanted to see you again and she got dragged along with him because he's in love with you. This…this is all your fault!"

He doesn't even realize he's said it at first. Her face is pale and she looks horrified and he doesn't know why until it hits him. And he breaks.

"I'm sorry!" he cries. "I didn't mean it, Livvie, I didn't mean it."

He reaches out to her and it's subtle, but he can see her flinch. She recovers quickly and returns his embrace. Eventually, she starts shushing him as she rubs his back. "I know it's not your fault, Livvie, I swear."

"It's okay, sweetheart. It's okay. You've been through a lot, Eli. You needed to get it out." She kisses the top of his head. "Have you talked to anyone about this?"

"The guidance counselor offered, but everything's been so crazy," he shrugs, "I just never went."

"If you're open to it, I think it would help," she brushes tears off his face. "This isn't you, sweetheart. Stealing drugs from your grandmother, that's a dangerous road. I don't want to see you do something you can't take back. Sometimes, talking to someone that's not related to you, that doesn't know you and won't judge you, it can help."

"Do you think Dad would be okay with it?"

"Absolutely."

~oOo~

Talking to someone does help, and for a while, things are okay-ish again. The cameras are still up, but Dad's home again. The soccer season ends, and he spends less time with his teammates and more with his family, including Liv and Noah. He's good, right up until the trial, and then suddenly he isn't anymore.

Kids in the hallways talk, and everyone is whispering about how his mom was murdered. He misses a few days to be with his family while they attend the trial and then he gets to hear about how his dad apparently kissed the woman that gave the order to have his mom blown up. Suddenly the trial that everyone told him was a slam dunk doesn't seem to be going their way.

He can't stick around to hear what the jury announces and finds himself in New Jersey. Mia is sweet and she isn't his first kiss, but she's his first everything else. It's hazy, but it gets really clear the next morning when he goes to wake her and she's cold. Livvie's words about something he can't take back are ringing in his ears and all he can think is that this is going to kill his father.

He's already called him for help, but he can't let him know that his son is a murderer. He makes his way to the bridge and it seems like such a simple solution. But the rookie cop convinces him to come with him. He's scared, so scared, but Livvie and his dad meet him at the station and despite everything, they don't get mad at him. They help him and eventually find out he didn't kill Mia and he can breathe again.

He goes back to therapy, a lot of therapy. Katie helps, having been in a similar situation when she was young. He's heard her joke about Livvie being the Patron Saint of the Stabler family, but hearing her story and Dickie's, he realizes it isn't really a joke. His dad is home more, even when he does sort of go undercover again, investigating dirty cops. He still misses his mom like crazy, but it keeps getting easier to breathe.

~oOo~

At the beginning of the summer, Eli fidgets as Livvie reads the pamphlets and brochures he'd given her in her office. If she was on his side, his dad would be an easy sell. "So…what do you think?"

She set them down on her desk and smiled at him. "This is really impressive, Eli. It'll let you dual enroll and you'll still get to play?"

"Yeah, apparently there's a couple of schools in the Pac-12 conference that are trying this program, so it's kind of set up like JV and Varsity teams."

"And Stanford wants you." She was practically beaming at him, and he felt a wave of relief. "That's incredible. I'm so proud of you!"

"You think it's a good idea?"

"A fresh start is never a bad idea." She nods. "And you've been doing better, keeping up with your therapy, according to what your dad tells me. Your grades last semester were phenomenal. This would get you your Associate degree, look great on your transcript and let you decide if you'd like to get your bachelor's at Stanford."

"Could..could you help me talk to Dad about it?" he asks, sheepishly. "He still listens to you more than anyone."

"Of course. Noah and I were supposed to come over for dinner tonight anyway."

"I know."

"Ah, I see your plan," she says, grabbing her stuff and flipping the lights off in her office. "Want to ride with me to get Noah from dance and then we can head over?"

"Works for me."

~oOo~

A month later, Livvie flies out with his dad and him to help set up his dorm room. Everything is changing again, but this feels right. No one knows him here as the kid whose mom got blown up or the kid that got arrested for murder (they always like to forget the part where he didn't actually do it). Here he can just be Eli.

Livvie is good for his dad and the few times that Dad looks like he's reconsidering all this and dragging him back to NYC, Livvie is able to distract him. The two of them just make sense and if someone is going to take the role of his stepmother, he'd much rather it be Livvie.

Before they leave, they take him out to dinner. When his dad excuses himself to the restroom, he takes advantage of what might be his last moment alone with Livvie, until the holidays anyway.

"You know," he says, as casually as he can, "Now that Grandma's moved in with Katie and I'm out here, Dad's going to be all alone at the apartment. I know we'd all feel better if maybe you and Noah spent some extra time with him." Much like his father, subtlety is not his strong point.

Thankfully, Livvie just looks amused. "I'm sure we can meet up for dinner every now and then. And you'll be home before you know it." She takes a sip of her drink.

He decides to just go for broke. "Livvie, I've got $50 in the pool that you and Dad will be together by Thanksgiving. Please do not let me lose to Dickie, I won't ever live it down."

When his dad gets back to the table, neither one will tell him why Livvie is so red and there's soda all over the table. Both are laughing and his dad just gets that goofy look on his face when he stares at Livvie. The best part is, Livvie is looking at him in the exact same way. Maybe, just maybe, Eli will win after all.


Note: The author of this SVU: Fall in Love story will be revealed in November