Chapter 10: Daphne
Daphne laid naked next to Niles in his bed. She had done it again; showing up to his place even though they'd agreed not to do this anymore. Well, she kept saying that, but it appeared that neither of them had agreed to it after all. She laid on her back, head resting against his pillow. Niles was on his side, propped up on his arm, staring down at her with what looked like affection. He was gently stroking her forehead, and the gesture was soothing. Daphne closed her eyes, thinking that she could just fall asleep, maybe go back to before all this happened, when things were less confusing.
You don't want to though, a traitorous voice in the back of her mind said. You love this. It's thrilling, and enjoyable. Besides, he loves you.
Nonsense. There is absolutely no evidence that Niles Crane is in love with me.
Was there?
She pushed those thoughts away, and opened her eyes. She sat up.
"I'm sorry, Niles - Dr Crane," she corrected herself. Keeping things more formal made it less likely to continue... right? "I don't know what came over me. I promise I won't come back. We really need to end this."
Her last sentence was almost accusatory towards Niles who, honestly, didn't instigate anything; rather just willingly went along with it. Niles sat up as well. She couldn't quite read his face, unsure if he was hurt. Daphne started to protest some more, when he interrupted her.
"Oh, come on, Daphne. Your plan of avoidance is clearly not working." He got a goofy grin on his face. "Clearly you are suffering from a lack of vitamin Crane. I know a doctor who can prescribe a daily dose." He was laughing now, his quip clearly amused him.
Daphne slapped his arm.
"Stop that, Niles, it isn't funny!" Niles was still laughing.
"Oh, but it is. You see, you can't stay away. Before, I was the one who was unable to..." He trailed off, sobering a little. "Sorry, Daphne."
"No, what? You 'were the one who was unable to' what?" She wanted him to finish that sentence.
Niles looked like a deer caught in the headlights. He opened his mouth, only to close it again without saying anything. Daphne just looked at him, not wanting to let him off the hook.
"Well?"
Niles sighed. He spoke slowly, choosing his words carefully.
"I shouldn't be acting like you're the only one unable to resist our time together. Honestly, I really didn't want to stop, but I wasn't going to push for more if that wasn't what you wanted. I care about you – for you, Daphne. But I don't know if I can take the uncertainty of whether you will want to continue things or not. With constantly wondering if you'll show up on my doorstep that night. I want this if you do, but I need to know if this is going to continue."
Daphne absorbed what he said.
He's right. It isn't fair to Niles for me to keep changing my mind.
She didn't even know why she was so unable to resist. Daphne wasn't someone who had a lot of casual sex or one night stands. She liked to be in a relationship, to have an emotional connection. Deep down, that was partly why she came to Niles in the first place. She wanted to have sex, and had considered a one night stand with a stranger that night, but didn't have that confidence. She wanted to be with someone who knew her.
Daphne knew from the first night that it would change the dynamic between them. She was expecting it to be once and then done, never again. Awkward, but eventually like it never happened. And, if Daphne was honest, she expected it to be mediocre like a lot of the sex she'd had in the past. Even with long term partners it took a while to get in synch with each other's wants and needs - if they ever got there at all.
With Niles, there was an instant connection. Is it because we've known each other for four years already?
They'd only slept together a handful of times now, but each time was easily the best she'd ever had. Niles seemed to actively pay attention to her, to what she was enjoying, listening to her. Both in and out of bed. The sex continued to improve as Niles remembered what she enjoyed, and ensured her pleasure came before his, every time. And Daphne was finding it just as enjoyable to figure out what worked for Niles as well.
Maybe that is why it's so difficult to pull away.
Daphne looked back at Niles, and flopped back against the pillows, unsure what she wanted to do.
"I'm sorry, Niles. I'm not being fair to you. I don't even know why it's so difficult to stop." She sighed. "Maybe because I'm having such a good time."
Niles smiled at her, clearly happy with her response.
"Well, I'm enjoying our time together too." He thought for a moment. "What if we agree to continue this? No one has to know."
Daphne listened. She wanted to continue, but she also wondered if it was a bad idea.
"We could set a rule that if it happens at all, it'll only happen here, at my place. That way, we can go about our lives as before, with everyone none the wiser." Niles looked at her, hopeful.
"I suppose..." Daphne shook her head, amazed she was even considering it. "But, we can't continue this. There has to be an end..." Daphne didn't know why he didn't see that.
Niles flopped down onto the bed next to Daphne. He slid an arm under her and pulled her close. Daphne noticed how much more confidence he seemed to have. Their first night together, he had been noticeably nervous, cautious. Like he was holding back, scared of saying or doing something wrong. But tonight, he pulled her into an embrace easily, as if it was the natural thing to do. Maybe because he knew now that she would let him. Niles turned his head towards her, burying his face into her hair, inhaling deeply.
I like this. It's comfortable, just being here with him.
"Daphne... if this needs to come to an end, it will. But, in the meantime, can we try to agree to the fact that it's going to happen? For my sanity?"
"Do I really drive you that crazy?" Daphne had meant showing up unannounced this last week. But Niles' response wasn't what she expected.
"Every day since we met," he murmured into her hair, mostly to himself.
Daphne puzzled over what he could have meant by that, before burying the possible answers into the depths of her subconscious. That's where the rest of the possibilities and inklings that she had about Niles lived.
She sighed, finally agreeing to his idea.
"All right. Say we continue for a little longer. Do we, what – have a set day? A bat signal?" Niles looked confused on her last suggestion, but didn't question it before responding.
"We could plan it in advance. Give each other some notice beforehand."
Daphne noticed he seemed excited at the prospect. She also noticed something else.
"What do you mean, 'give each other notice'? Are you saying you're going to arrange meetings too?" Niles looked at her.
"Well, I think at this stage I should be able to dictate some of our, um, comings..." he let the word hang, grinned cheekily at the double entendre, "...and goings."
Daphne slapped him playfully again.
"You keep that up and I'll leave right now." Niles chuckled, knowing that it was an empty threat. "Besides, didn't you say that you wouldn't end this?"
"Yes. And I mean that. I don't see myself wanting this to end." Daphne could tell from his tone that he was serious. "But if I ask, and you turn me down, I won't ask again. You'll have to reinitiate."
Daphne ruminated on that for a minute and nodded in agreement. She moved on to the next question.
"Should we have a certain amount of time we need to give each other?" Niles shrugged in response jostling her head, which was resting against his shoulder. "Hey!"
"Sorry. No, I think as long as we contact each other beforehand, we can work out timing from there."
Daphne nodded, satisfied enough with this.
"Okay. I agree. Let's try it your way, Niles."
Niles seemed pleased, before thinking of something else.
"Oh! I want to add something else to our treaty!"
"Since when did it become a treaty!?"
"Just now, since we just enacted it. We can call it Le Traité d'Amour." The same goofy grin from earlier spread across his face.
Daphne groaned from the absolute cheesiness of it.
"That's terrible, Niles."
"It's, um, a working title. I have a couple of other names in mind, if you want to change it."
"Fine, what is it?"
"The title? Well, just calling it the Treaty would work just as well, but we could call it an accord, or-"
"No! I mean, what did you want to add?"
Niles grinned sheepishly.
"Ah. Yes." He swallowed, suddenly flustered. "Well, I guess I wanted to mention I want to, maybe every once in a while, um, just ha-have... dinner together. No strings attached, no expectation of anything else."
Daphne was stunned. She was expecting some other request linked to sex, but the idea of spending an evening together just for dinner surprised her.
Sounds almost like a date...
She didn't say anything for a while, trying to understand the reason for the request. The silence made Niles visibly nervous.
"Look, I'm sorry Daphne. If you're not comfortable with that, forget I mentioned it."
"No, no. It's not that. It's... a nice idea. Let's try it."
