Bounce the Kitty Can Do Amazing Things

Bounce the Kitty Can Do Amazing Things

By: Paige-somethin's-cookin'-in-the-kitchen-Collins and with a lil' bit o' help from Meghan-lookie-I'm-Dr.- Evil-Jinx

Author's Note: Yay! This is the prologue. We say yay too much. Oh, and Paige Collins wrote the part about Draco screaming for Lucius to dancing with the house-elf to the end of that scene. She's quite proud of it. Meghan: You brag. That's the funniest part. Now I'm jealous. Oh, yeah and this is a parody and meant to be OoC, so don't waste your time with flaming or saying "I don't think they act that way…" because, to give it to you straight, we don't give a crap.

Draco was bouncing off the walls, and smacking his shoulders up against the walls and caused the walls to shake.

"It's...my...BIRTHDAY!" screamed Draco. He was standing on top of one of their lovely white couches and was bouncing wildly. He took a deep breath. "It's my birthday, it's really my birthday, my birthdaaaay!" Then he propelled himself forward and busted it on the floor.

As you guessed, it was Draco's birthday.

He lay quietly on the floor, out of breath, panting, "It's...birthday...mine..."

Someone snorted. Draco looked up to see the seventeen-year-old maid walk by, shaking her head. "Act your age," she said mockingly.

"Cause I'm..." he said, leaping to his feet, his energy back, "fifteen! I'm fifteen! I'm fifteen, fifteen, fifteen!"

He ran around the room. "Woohoo, maid-woman!" Draco cried as he grabbed the maid and around the waist and swung her around wildly. But that was a mistake, because the maid was heavier than Draco thought.

She dropped to the floor and shook her fist roughly. "I'm telling your parents!"

Draco shrugged. "Go ahead and tell Lucius, he only worries about Voldemort and go ahead and tell Narcissa, she won't care either."

The maid got up and began to exit the room. "You need more discipline."

Draco shrugged again. "Maybe." Then he chucked a goldfish at her.

She dodged it angrily as Draco bounced out of the room too. He bounced down to the dining room where he knew Lucius was.

And he was right.

"Hey, Loose," Draco said. He grabbed a chair next to Lucius. "Old man, whatcha doing?"

Lucius had his hands over his face. "It's...nothing," he said coldly. He looked up. "Where's your mother?"

"Narce? No idea," said Draco, looking around. "I was hoping you'd seen her."

"I was hoping you'd seen her."

Draco made a face. "So, what'd I get for my birthday?"

Lucius smiled. "A car," he said. Then he added, "But it's a useful little Muggle thing." He winked at Draco. "Lots of chicks."

Draco was disgusted. What did his father know about picking up girls? "Right, Lucius. What'd you really get me?"

Lucius grinned. "Really. That's what I got you."

"I don't know how to drive. Am I old enough to drive? Can I have a chauffeur? Can that young maid be my chauffeur? Can a house-elf?"

"First off," Lucius said, "I have my own private road you can drive on, because, just between you and me, I don't have a driver's license."

"Second? What about my chauffeur?"

"Second, no."

Draco pouted. "She's useless anyway. Fire her! Fire her!"

Lucius frowned. "I can't fire her, Draco."

"Why not?"

"Cause I can't."

And he left the dining room without having breakfast. But Draco figured he didn't want breakfast without Narcissa.

It was a boring day, the whole day, it was boring. Draco couldn't wait till that night, when they had a huge celebration with their whole family. It was Draco's favorite part about his birthday's, besides the presents. Of which he usually got lots.

"Luuuuuuuucius," Draco moaned. "Can't I get the car now?"

"No."

"Can I have Mommy's gift?"

"No and the fake-innocent-little-kid act isn't going to get you anywhere either, little mister."

Draco frowned. "Did you invite You-Know-Who--"

"Voldemort."

"Voldemort. Did you invite him? Is he getting me a gift?"

Lucius frowned. "I think very high of Voldemort, Draco and I wish that you wouldn't joke about him like that all the time.

Draco rolled his eyes. "You knew I was only kidding, Father. I barely know the guy. Why would he be getting me a gift?"

Lucius raised his eyebrows. "Barely know him? And on what occasion have you two met?"

Draco shrugged. "I don't know," he said. "I think I was thirteen when he came over to the mansion..."

"On business, of course," Lucius said firmly. He sighed. "Where is that mother of yours, Draco?"

"Where mothers are on their little boy's birthdays, I would guess," Draco said. I'm fifteen, I'm fifteen, I'm fifteen. Better not jump around anymore though. The old man's in a bad mood.

Lucius had been in a bad mood since he'd discovered Draco had swung around the maid.

"How many more hours till tonight?

"Several, Draco, several," Lucius said. "Look, I'm going looking for Narcissa. You stay here and talk to a house-elf if you're that bored."

Draco made a face.

"You know I'm joking, son."

He left the room.

Draco was still making a face. "Talk to a house-elf? Talk to a house-elf? What kind of a sicko is that man? What kind of a person does he think I am? Honestly, a house-elf? Sick."

He shook his head. "Where are servants when you need them? I'm thirsty." He grabbed a little bell and dinged it. "Hello, a little service? What do we pay people to do, sit on your butts all day?"

He shook the little bell some more. No one came.

Draco looked at the bell. "Guess we need a bigger bell." He tossed it behind him.

"You didn't have to hit me with it," said a voice behind him.

Draco turned around and saw the maid standing in the doorway.

"I didn't ring for you."

"I know," she replied testily. "I came to tell you to stop ringing that bell."

"I rang it only for service," Draco said snottily. "But, uh, while you're here, can you get me something to drink?"

The maid wrinkled her nose. "Yeah right," she hissed nastily and whirled around.

And almost knocked into Lucius.

"Oh, sir, I'm ever so sorry!" she squealed. "I'm really, really sorry!"

Lucius made a face at her. "Get a life."

The maid nodded and began to exit quickly. "Yes, sir, I will, sir."

Draco snickered quietly. "Hey, old man, did you find your woman?"

"Narcissa?" Lucius asked. "Nope. And you know, Draco, you're right." Lucius winked at Draco. "Maybe we should fire her, but she's cute."

"Are you insinuating...?" Draco shuddered. "That's disgusting."

"For you, Draco," Lucius said. "She's cute, ask her out."

"As if!" Draco said. He hoped his voice wasn't too high-pitched.

Draco sat quietly by the door. He sat in a large chair he almost broke once when he was five. He and a house-elf had a fight and Draco was pushed back into the chair. But the chair was holding Draco up pretty good, ten years later.

"Oh, what a glorious day it is," sang Draco. "It's my birthday, whatdaya say? I'm fifteen, not fourteen, or sixteen. I'm another year older, cause it's my birthday today. I'm a whole year older, I say, whatdaya, I say, whatdaya, I say whatdaya say?" Draco stood up and jumped off the chair.

He landed face first in the rug.

"Yeah."

Draco lay there for a minute, contemplating his next move.

"Hey, kid, what are you doing down there?"

The voice was female.

"No, not you," came Draco's muffled reply, as he had his face buried into a rug. "Anyone but you."

"Glad to see I'm appreciated around here," said the maid. "Glad to see someone actually likes me."

"Who?"

"Who what?"

"Who what who what?"

"Who what who what, what, what, who?"

There was uncomfortable silence. "Who what-"

"Don't. Start. It. Again."

"Sorry, ma'am, but as you may have forgotten, we pay you," Draco said. He lifted his face off the rug and stared angrily into hers. "I suggest you drop your attitude."

"I don't have an attitude," said the maid dully. "You're a brat. I don't see how your family stands you."

Draco thought for a second. "Come to think of it, neither do I," he said. He pointed towards a door. "Away with you."

The maid stared. "Are you firing me?"

"Do you want me to?"

"Aarrrrgh," groaned the maid. "You are so impossible."

She began to walk away.

"You know, Father may have been right about that girl," said Draco. "She is kinda cute."

"Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaadddddeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!" squealed Draco. His voice echoed through the manor. "It's time, it's time, it's time, it's time, it's time, it's time, it's time, it's time, it's time, it's time, it's time, it's time, it's time, it's time!!!"

"Huh?" Lucius came running. "It's time already?"

"Iiiiiiiiit's tiiiiiiiime!" Draco yelled. "For my family to get together, under the night weeeeather, and give me presents and stuff, no socks, no underwear, no fake hair, no girly things!"

"Huh?" said Narcissa. She appeared beside Lucius. "Oh, I can just guess what time it is."

"It's time!"

"Time to get together…"

"It's time!"

"Time for presents…"

"It's time!"

"Time for-"

"It's time!"

"Boy, let me finish my sentence!"

"Sorry, but its time for the time for the time!"

"Huh?" Lucius looked at Narcissa and Draco. Narcissa seemed to be doing some little dance with Draco. "What?"

"It's time for the time for the time for the time for the time!" sang Narcissa and Draco.

"Time for the…time for the…time for the time for the time!"

Narcissa walked over to Lucius. "Come on, we have to get things ready. The whole family will be here any minute now."

"Can't we get servants and house-elves to do that?" asked Lucius.

Narcissa waved her hand. "They're helping, now come on!"

She grabbed Lucius's hand and flew to the big room thingy, leaving Draco still dancing around.

"Oh, it's my birthday!" he sang. He stopped and saw something. A group of house-elves were crossing the room. He dashed over to them, seized one of the house-elves hands and started dancing.

The house-elf was obviously confused, but danced anyway.

"Oh, it's the birthday time! The birthday time for the birthday boy!" Draco cried. He flung his head back and let all his emotions and stress melt away as he and the house-elf danced across the floor.

The other house-elves observed this and clapped.

"Oh, I never want this night to end," he whispered to the confused house-elf. The house-elf nodded.

"I wonder, sir, if the stars are out tonight," said the house-elf.

"Perhaps-" Draco stopped in mid sentence and mid dance. He thought for a second who he was dancing with. It was a house-elf.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" Draco let go of the house-elf's hand and jumped back, rubbing his hands on his clothes. "I'm infected, I'm infected, I'm infected!"

The house-elf ran away too; back to the other house-elves and held her hands up at them. "Look, sir danced with me!"

The house-elves rushed off.

"Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew," Draco said. He looked at his poor, dirty hands. Why had he danced with a house-elf? Was he just a bit too giddy? He ran a hand through his hair and let his breath out slowly. That was a good dance.

He walked upstairs to the bathroom.

The bathroom was huge. There was a pool-sized bathtub, a huge sink and mirrors on all the walls.

Across the bathroom was a house-elf bathing in the water. She squealed and grabbed a towel as Draco shielded his eyes.

"Gee!" Draco exclaimed as the house-elf cursed and walked out of the bathroom. "Now there's gonna be nightmares! Why aren't you with the other house-elves?"

"I wanted to take a bath, sir," said the house-elf.

"Leave," Draco said. "Just, leave. Leave." Draco removed his hands from in front of his eyes and saw that the house-elf had a towel on.

But just as the house-elf was leaving, she took off the towel, just to anger Draco. Draco threw a shampoo bottle at her.

"House-elves," he muttered, running his hands under cool water. "Nasty little things. Well, at least that one bathes."

He reached for a towel. Then he realized that the house-elf had taken the only towel in the whole bathroom and now he had wet hands. What was the world coming to these days?

"Stupid house-elf," Draco said quietly, drying his hands on his pants. "Scared me half to death, it did. Oh, well, can't let something like ruin my good day. It's my birthday!"

And Draco bounced down the hall, and unfortunately knocked a passing house-elf silly. But the incident was quite by accident.

"Oh, it's my birthday, I get presents that are nice, I'll get gifts, not rice. Rice may be good to eat and it may be a treat, but I'd rather get presents that are oh so sweet," sang Draco quietly down the hall.

Hmph. The hall was never this long. Then it hit Draco: he was going down the wrong way.

"Hehe, silly me," said Draco, his cheeks burning. He whirled around and walked the right way.

Which took a shorter time than the other way and suddenly, our author gets confu-sed.

"Hmmm…wait, never mind," says our pretty author Paige Collins. She resumes the story.

"Hey, old guy?" Draco called. He was wondering if Lucius was still in the big room thingy. "Old guy?"

Crash!

"Errrgh!"

"That…would be him," Draco said. He rushed into the big room thingy. "What did you do, old man?"

Lucius was sitting on the floor, now out cold. A group of panicked house-elves were crowding around him.

From the looks of it, he'd tripped over a chair.

"Hey, Father, are you okay?" Draco called.

Lucius raised his hand and several house-elves took this the wrong way and started kissing his hand.

"No, no, you idiots, I'm trying to get up," Lucius said. He grabbed the side of a table. "Get away from me, get, get!"

The house-elves scattered as Narcissa and Draco rushed over.

"Oh, Lucius, what did you do?" Narcissa asked.

"The chair," Lucius said darkly. He looked at an over-turned chair. "Burn. That. Chair."

"Oh, Lucius, it's just a silly old chair," Narcissa said. "It isn't like it did much damage, did it?"

"Pooh was just a silly old bear and thanks to him, my sister is in a mental hospital!" spat Lucius. "That chair is evil I tell you, pure evil!"

Narcissa rolled her eyes. "Come on, the family will be here any…oh, they're here already."

She looked over at the servants and house-elves. "Well?"

They'd been watching the Malfoy's and they instantly began running around.

"Hmph. Well, hurry and run upstairs Draco and change into your dress robes," ordered Narcissa. No, more like barked. "Why didn't you do that earlier?"

She scooted Draco out. Draco frowned and quickly made his way up the stairs, pausing to see the family coming in.

"I'd better hurry," he whispered.

Inside his room, his dress robes were laid out on the bed. Draco frowned harder. "What does that woman think I am, a little kid? Hmph. I wonder where my shoes are, anyway." He tripped over something large. His shoes.

So he pulled off his clothes and tossed them across the room.

Knock, knock.

Someone was at his door. He didn't have time to open the door, though; he had to get dressed. And besides, all he had on was underwear. "Go away, I'll be out in a second."

"But sir-"

"Go, now."

"Sir-"

"Just go now!"

"Sir, I have no choice but to come in!" The doorknob clicked and in strolled a house-elf.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Draco screamed.

The whole moment went by in a blur.

Draco was left standing there naked, his cheeks burning and the house-elf apologizing.

"I am sorry, sir," said the house-elf. "I am sorry, sir, so sorry, ever so sorry, oh so sorry, ever so sorry, sir!"

"Just…just go…" Draco pointed to the door.

"As you wish, sir," said the house-elf. Draco heard the door slam and then open again. "Sir, I must say that I am ever so sorry over the whole incident…"

"LEAVE!"

"Yes, sir, yes, sir…"

Draco shook his head and, feeling very angry (and embarrassed) he finished dressing and strolled down.

When Draco came down, everyone was standing there, watching him. Draco felt like a fairy tale princess at a ball, in a lovely, shining, flowing gown, and his blonde hair on top of his head in a wonderful hairdo.

To amuse himself, Draco imagined what would happen if he really was a girl.

"Oh, this party is ever so...wonderful," giggled Draco. His date, the lovely Lucius Malfoy, grinned.

"You, my dear, look ever so wonderful."

"Oh ho ho ho...you flatter me."

"Draco!"

Draco came out of his thoughts and saw Lucius walking across the room fast.

"Oh ho ho ho...yes my dear?" said Draco in a high-pitched voice. "Oh, oh, I mean...what is it...daddy dear?"

"Have you turned gay or something?" said Lucius.

Draco grinned. "Not if you want me to, gorgeous."

Lucius shook his head. "Anyway, come on, we're going to eat and...then you can have your presents."

Draco giggled like a schoolgirl.

"And stop doing that, it's embarrassing."

"Yes sir," said Draco in his normal voice.

The dinner turned out to be delightful. Every Malfoy had attended the party. Draco was standing, watching everyone do stuff. He didn't feel much like joining in. Instead, he chose to watch.

Just as Draco sat down in a chair, someone tapped him on the shoulder. Thinking it was another relative wanting to wish Draco a happy birthday, he rolled his eyes as he turned around. "Yes?"

Instead of a Malfoy, there was a small house-elf standing there, holding a tiny, fuzzy, furry ball of fluff in its arms. "Someone wanted me to give this to you, sir."

Draco rolled his eyes again. "A kitten?"

"Yes, Master Draco. A kitten-nen-nen-nen."

Draco stared at the house-elf. "What's wrong with you?"

The house elf looked around to make sure no one was listening to them. "Well, sir, I wasn't supposed to tell you, but some of us house elves are back there...doing something."

Draco's mouth dropped. "What are you doing? You aren't...doing what I think you're doing, are you?"

"Oh, no, no, sir, nothing like that, no. We's doing something called 'drugs', sir."
"Drugs? You're high?"

"Higher than a kite, sir."

Draco shrugged. "Okay."

"You aren't mad, sir?"

"Nah, just disappointed you didn't try to slip some in the old man's drink or food or something."

"Should we have, sir?"

"Hmmmm...no. He's going to get drunk in a few minutes, so I'm just gonna wait."

"Yes sir...and your kitten." He handed the furry white kitten over to Draco. "We gave some of those drug things to the cat too."

"You did? The cat is high?"

"I'm sure it is now, sir. I hope we haven't harmed it in any way."

"I don't really think you did. Leave now."

"Yes, sir."

Draco stared at the little kitten. It was cute and it didn't look high to Draco, except Draco didn't know what a cat would look like when it did drugs, as he never had a cat that could be busted for possession in the future.

"Whatcha got there, son?"

Draco whirled around to see Daddy Dearest standing there. "Oh, it's a kitten."

"Cool. What are you going to name it?"

"Drugs, I think. Drugs the Cat."

"Drugs the Cat. I like it. But why 'Drugs'?"
"The house-elves are doing drugs."

"Hmmm...I knew they were just a bit sillier than usual today." He sighed. "Can I see it?"

"What are you going to do with it, make animal sacrifices?"

"Nah, that was last week...ahhhh, come here. Cute little thing. Shame I'll have to kill it."

"WHAT?!"

"Kidding, Draco, kidding."

Draco was quiet for a moment. "You aren't by any chance drunk, are you?"

"I'm getting there, son, I'm getting there."

"Oookay."

Lucius held the kitten to the light.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm checking to see if it's counterfeit or not."

"Right, Father. You just do that and go have some more to drink, though I think you've had enough."

"Right." Lucius turned around, still holding the kitten.

"Uh, Father? The kitten?"

Lucius looked at the kitten in his hand, like he didn't know it was there. "Oh, yeah, okay. Here, I'll toss it to you, son."

"Nooo, Father."

But the cat was already sailing through the air. Draco jumped, grabbing madly and missed the cat as it hit the floor. There was a collective gasp among all the Malfoys.

"Oh, man, Father, you killed it."

But suddenly, the cat bounced on the floor.

Draco whistled, remembering what had become known as the "Ferret Incident".

"Look, it bounces!" cried Draco's aunt.

"Mommy, Mommy, I want a bouncing kitty too!"

Everyone was talking at once now, staring at the kitten, still steadily bouncing.

"It's witchcraft, it is!"

"Of course it is!"

The kitten was looking like it was in pain now. It meowed softly and if kittens could cry, tears would be running poor little face.

"Somebody stop it before it pokes someone's eye out!"

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh! My eye!"

"What?!"

"Wait...eyelash."

Draco shook his head. "I know how it feels."

Everyone stared at Draco.

"Dear, are you drunk?" said Narcissa.

"Nah, he ain't drunk, old woman," said Lucius, taking another drink from his mug and turning to the crowd. "He can morph into any animal after he acquires its DNA pattern!"

Narcissa shook her head. "Now, you are drunk dear."

"I'm not as think as you drunk I am."

"Come along, dear. Draco, you can begin opening your presents. Come, Lucius, it's bed time."

"Oh, goody, are you coming too?"

"No, dear, I'm not."

Draco turned away from his weird parents and looked at the mountain of presents and heard Lucius's voice echoing down the hall as he screamed, "I want some of that ecstamacy!"

Draco grabbed the present and heard a thud. The cat had stopped bouncing. Draco ignored this and began to rip off the wrapping paper. It was...it was...it was...

"Aw, crap..." muttered Draco. It was the Phonics game.

"I got you that!" cried a person in a long black robe in the corner.

Draco looked at the person and they disappeared in a cloud of pink smoke.

Narcissa was making her way down the stairs, muttering, "I'll bet that was Dobby."

Draco rolled his eyes. He didn't doubt it...Dobby always was a little bit...sweet. Draco reached for another present. He opened it and discovered it was...flowered woman's underwear.

"Ah, that's from me!" cried his uncle, he was even more drunken than Lucius.

"Dear, if that's my underwear, where's Draco's present...oh man."

Draco threw the underwear across the room as though it was on fire. "Nasty nasty nasty."

Draco opened about five other presents and liked best among the other gifts the Firebolt he got from his great-great-great grandmother.

"I can't believe you're still alive," said Draco.

"Neither can I, dear."

When all the presents had been opened and three people had been lost in wrapping paper and there were search parties sent out, Narcissa went and got the keys from Lucius to Draco's new car and told Draco Lucius wished him Happy Birthday, among other things.

The Malfoys finally left in tears, their eyes watering from the horrible sight they'd seen near the end of the party when Lucius ran through the room in a leopard skin thong, singing "The Thong Song". (The great-great-great grandmother enjoyed that.)

When everything was over, Draco came to see his kitten. The kitten was sitting under the table, asleep. The cat had had too much to drink and had seen too much nudity for one kitty brain to handle in one night.

"Kitty...I think I'll name you Bounce."

"Moew." (It's poor little brain wasn't working right.)

"I'll bet you do," said Draco, patting Bounce on its tiny, fuzzy shoulder. "Let's get you to bed."

"Moo."

Draco bent over and picked up the kitten and the bottom of his dress robes ripped all down his back. Draco gasped.

"Oooh, nice underwear."

Draco turned to see the young maid again.

"Thank you. My Mommy picked them out."

"Solid white looks good on you."

"Hey, why are talking to me so nicely?"

"Want me to be mean?"

"Nah. But I still need something to drink."

"Drink some of whatever that is behind you."

"That? That's beer."

The maid shrugged. "I saw Lucius. You'd look cute in something like that."

Draco blushed. "Reeeeallly?"

"No, not really. I gotta go."

Draco shrugged also and went upstairs. As soon as he was in, he took his ripped dress robes off and opened the closet door to stuff them in there. When he opened the door, two house elves tumbled out.

"Master Draco!" cried one of them.

"Get out!" screamed Draco, sick of being seen nearly naked.

The house elves went, muttering about finding a new place.

"Yeah, you just do that!" cried Draco lamely. He groaned and flopped down on his bed, kicking his shoes off. He knew no one went in there while he slept and while contemplating whether to get up and get on some pajamas, he fell asleep.

"Oooh, baby."

Draco's eyes opened suddenly. Someone was in his room. He sat up and saw a small, fat, balding man.

"Who are you?" asked Draco. "Are you…my fairy godmother?"

"Yes…well, unfortunately, no."

"Who are you then?"

"People call me Wormtail and let me tell you this, Draco: you look totally hot in just –"

Lucius, who'd just entered the room, cleared his throat.

"Right, right. Get up, Draco."

"But I don't have any pants on!"

"Lord Voldemort won't even notice," said Wormtail, shoving Draco out the door.

"But I feel uncomfortable! Let me get my pants on!"

"I'm telling you, if you were naked, he wouldn't notice."

"Really?" Draco began to take his underwear off, just to shock his father.

"Stop that, Draco!" said Lucius and Draco saw he too was nearly naked. "I can be the only half naked person here!"

"Yes, sir."

They all went downstairs and saw a creepy guy in black robes standing next to Narcissa, questioning her about something.

"There he is, ask him!"

Voldemort looked above her and saw Draco coming down the stairs in his underwear. He frowned. "Couldn't you have put some pants on, son?"

Draco glared at Wormtail.

"Anyway, let's get down to business, Draco. I want your cat…Blouse, was it?"

"Bounce."

"Bounce, right, Bounce. I want Bounce. Bouncing cats are very rare."

"Yep, yep, yeppers!" exclaimed Lucius.

"Shut it, Malfoy!"

"Yes, sir."

Voldemort turned back to Draco. "Now Draco…you're a big boy. You're what, seven eight?"

"Fifteen."

"Fifteen. Goodness. Now, I want that cat and I want it now or your parents get it."

"Never. I love it too much and it can dance really good!"

"Really?" said Voldemort, sounding interested. "Never mind that…its either Boost or your daddy gets it."

"Gets what?"

"Gets it."

"Oooh, nifty." Lucius clapped his hands together.
Voldemort rolled his eyes. "Now where is Boom?"

"It's Bounce and you aren't getting him/her."

Voldemort frowned. "You don't even know your cat's sex?"

"Oooh, you're nasty!" Lucius cried.

"Gender. The cat's gender."

Draco shook his head. "No, I don't."

Voldemort raised his eyebrows. "Really?"
"I think its male."

"Well, go get it and we'll see."

"No, you'll take it!"

"No I won't!"

"Yes you will!"

"No I won't!"

"Yes you will!"

"No I…heck with it, I'm killing Lucius." He turned his ray gun on Lucius and cried, "This is for marrying my daughter, murdering my wife and then breaking my little girl's heart by cheating on her with some girl named Fafafa!"

"Huh?" said everyone.

"Never mind. But he still gets it!"

"NOOOOOO!"

To be continued…

Will Draco ever give Voldemort Bounce? Will Lucius ever be sober again? Will Fafafa ever discover she really has feelings for Draco after she gets out of the hospital? Find out on the next exciting chapter of Bounce the Kitty!