Chapter 9: The Grim Reaper's Gift

Conker was dead, there was nothing Acorn could do. He would have to be the bearer of bad news to the sergeant. The military's greatest soldier ever, had just been killed, by an ambush, Acorn had quickly assured himself that he would kill the Tediz that destroyed Conker.
Meanwhile (Oh yes, there's more of them) Conker was impatiently waiting for Greg, as without him he couldn't return to fight the Tediz, he always had a fine selection of Tails, just in case this moment would arise. "Well... Well, look who's back!" sneered Greg, clutching his scythe. Greg checked on Conker's profile; "C...CO... Aha! Conker! Conker the Chipmunk, no, Conker the squirrel! Ha! Found you, you little prick! What"? forty five bloody lives!? That Can't be right!?" Conker smiled to himself. He gathered a stack just in case this day would come. "OK Now can I get out?" Greg snapped, "What!? Do you think I like having squirrels around!? Right! That's it sod off! You little prick!" Just as he said that, a familiar looking skeleton hand grabbed Conker and dropped him off next to Acorn.
"Conker! Your OK!" Cheered Rodent, "I knew you hadn't died!" Conker got off the ground and brushed the dust off his arms, "well that's nit exactly true." Acorn Looked puzzled, "what do ya mean Conker?" Conker carried on, "well... you wouldn't understand!" Acorn was about to ask what he was on about, but he decided to catch up to Conker.
They arrived in a huge room, There were Tediz guarding all the possible exits. Conker swiftly Annihilated the guard in front of him. Two more guards came over. "More Tediz, and I was hoping it would have been easier!" Groaned Conker. The Tediz heads suddenly exploded, Acorn had assumed the sniper position. Conker ran out and shot two of the Tediz, "INTRUDER!" Yelled one of the Tediz, Conker hit a near by Tediz with the end of his gun, knocking it out. He dived out of the way of incoming fire from two Tediz, and responded by holding the trigger of his uzis down. Their heads exploded, and a fountain of green blood and stuffing poured out of them, one fell down two their knees, the other fell off the platform they were standing on and fell on another Tediz, who was knocked out. After hours of battling, Conker finally laid a bullet through the head of a knocked out Tediz.
Conker took a moment to check his bearings, there was a computer In the centre of the room, and many doors outlining. Acorn checked the computer, "preparing eye scan..."
"Ah Shit!" Groaned Acorn, "5...4...3...2...1... Analysing user..." Conker grabbed an eye from one of the corpses and hurled it into the computer, it bounced off the computer just as Acorn was being analysed. "Welcome Tediz number 43255677532457876532334643..." As the number was being read out Conker and Acorn couldn't help but think, there must have been a lot these monsters, as the computer seemed to be reading an endless number. After the numbers stopped, Acorn checked the computer screen, "hmm... nothing interesting... I think I'll contact the sergeant!"
The sergeant was checking on Conker's position, "they should be almost through the first island now, I hope they're OK..." Suddenly a call came through, "We need some sort of pickup general!" Declared Rodent, "we've cleared out the first island!" the Sergeant wiped the sweat of his head, relieved, "we'll be there in 1800 hours!" Acorn checked his watch, "that gives us... 3 minutes!" Acorn turned to Conker, lets get going! We've got 3 minutes before the pickup arrives!" Announced Acorn. Conker and Acorn turned to the doorway, but as they were about to enter, they heard a snarl.
It was a Tediz, "I thought we got them all!" Yelled Conker, "Wait, this is no ordinary Tediz! It's a robot!" Acorn warned, the Tediz had to red eyes, it's body was covered with fur, with some metallic elements piercing through it's ragged exterior. It had a small rocket launcher in one hand which was aimed at Conker. The Tediz looked at him with an evil glare, and fired a rocket. Conker's eyes widened and jumped out of their sockets, he ducked just in time to see the rocket sail past him, and blast a nearby wall. The wall collapsed, and the Tediz other arm, changed into a chain-saw. The Tediz moved in for the kill, With Conker and Acorn firing rapidly with their weapons. The Tediz walked closer, the bullets bouncing off him. He finally got in range to use his chain-saw, Conker fell backwards, he looked at the blade collapsing on him, he closed his eyes, waiting for the hit...
Suddenly the blade stopped, Conker opened his eyes, what was originally a ruthless beast, now seemed like a harmless toy. "Low battery..." The Tediz glowing eyes began to dim, eventually nothing was left in the once evil eyes. Everything was silent, The Tediz robot was unable to stand in his position and fell to the floor, his chain-saw arm being positioned next to his leg. "Back up power activating..." The creature burst back into life, as did his chain-saw, ripping one of his legs off. Conker and Acorn sighed, but saw the beast back off towards the computer. "Warning...warning... self destruct in 02:00 minutes (note: this is said as zero, two, zero, zero minutes) Conker looked at the computer, "Not again!" He cried. Conker and Acorn turn and ran for the beach.
The path was very confusing, and Conker found himself to be leaping over different sets of lasers, presented to him in an absurd pattern, "just like old times." Conker sighed, as he wasted a Tediz that tried to ambush him. It wasn't long before Conker exited the Hell hole.
Conker looked outside, he had roughly thirty seconds left, and the Tediz had set up a special leaving gift for him. No, not Bazookas, but 5 turrets positioned along a path of barbed wire. Conker made a mad dash for the exit, as did Acorn, but they were stopped by a turret, and forced to take cover in a nearby trench. "Conker!" Yelled Rodent, "We've gotta run this one!" Conker looked at rodent, "are you crazy!?" Shouted Conker, trying to make his voice heard above the rest of the gunfire, "we'd be ripped to shreds!"
"But it's our only chance at making it out in time!" Conker realised this, and waited for the turret to reload. After the Turret halted fire, Conker jumped out of the trench and ran through the turrets, the sergeant had already arrived, and the base was going to blow up in no more then 15 seconds. Conker leaped onto the boat, followed by Acorn, "Let's get out of here!" He yelled, the sergeant did so, and the base exploded, several Tediz corpses flew into the air, Conker sighed, "We forgot the prisoners..." Acorn looked back at the base, and saw the remainder of the prisoners go with the base.