It was a perfectly cliched day. A warm sun shone brightly behind cotton puff clouds, nestled happily in a bright blue sky. Birds chirped happily, diving and swooping and doing other things that happy birds do on nice days. It was the sort of day when even particularly nasty people had a smile for anyone who would look their way.

It was the sort of day when one is especially displeased at being a vampire.

Because it shoves all that happy, fluffy crap down your throat. And you just CHOAK on it.

But everyone else was happy. It was just members of the undead legions who had to spoil the party for everyone else.

A miscellaneous and unnamed vampire (and therefore ultimately doomed to die) sat in a typically dank hole somewhere. It was a vampire-hole of sorts. Dank. And full of vampires. He glanced over at miscellaneous vampire number two and heaved a little sigh.

This went unnoticed.

Again, he emitted a pathetic little noise. Sending a sidelong glance at his equally doomed companion, who continued to stare into his dank surroundings, as if unaware of the other vampire's displeasure. The third noise emitted by our starring little blood sucker was not nearly so subtle, and finally his friend turned to him, a look of distaste on his drawn face.

"For God's sake, what?" he demanded, with not a little bit of anger.

"I'm bored." his vampy pal admitted.

"You're bored." doomed-to-die-vampire-number-two asked, arcing a thin brow slightly.

"Yeah. I'm not having fun." he nodded slightly.

"You're not having ... "

"Fun."

"Fun."

"Yeah."

"Fun."

"This conversation isn't helping."

"Well, lah dee dah!"

"Lah dee dah?"

"Yeah. Lah dee friggin' dah!"

"You're bored too, aren't you?"

"Out of my mind."

"We could kill something."

"We did that yesterday."

"We could maim something?"

"That's sort of along the lines of killing something."

"Nah, you leave it alive. And then laugh at it when it begs for mercy. That's pretty funny, you have to admit."

"It gets old."

"Take that back!"

"You're not the vampire I sired anymore."

"Don't turn this into a marriage."

"So."

"So."

"You wanna kill the Slayer?"

"Yeah, okay."

And that's how the ingenious plot was hatched.