Okay...first of –
thank you *so* much to all of you who have commented through the story – I appreciate
the time you've taken to tell me what you think, to help me out with what's
wrong and for all your encouragement :-) You have been absolutely, totally
amazing – thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Thanks to those of ye angels who reviewed
last time round:
Persephone (I try
to do the unexpected :-) I hope it worked out! Thank you for all your comments –
you've been wonderful. The story about Blue comes after Remember.)
Dead Flower (I was
rather in a life sucks sort of mood when I wrote it. ::grins:: Ah Lisa, and
Cern...you've seen my cunning plan...thank you for all the comments. You're
always refreshingly honest.)
Disappointed Again
(Well, I'm glad the story made you react...if you want to hate it, fair enough,
that's your prerogative. Thanks!)
Dwayberry (I just
wanted to writesomething that wasn't happy, y'know? I get really sick of
happiness sometimes :-) And it was definitely a challenge!)
Diomede (Chatoya
and Blue are coming up after I'm done with Remember :-) There is soemthing
called SAD – seasonal affective disorder, which means you get down when the weather
is bad :-) Thank you so much!)
Starwisher (Thanks!
Well, yeah…I really couldn't see how Jal could survive in the modern world.)
Me (I kind of like
sadness :-) Some of my favourite songs are sad ones. Thank you for all your
comments :-) )
Dark Angel (Thank
you! I find writing sad endings difficult, so I'm glad that it worked! Thanks!)
Myst (It was a bit
of a tragedy, I know! I didn't mean for it to get this long. The next one is
aiming to be a little angsty...what I write is basically how I feel. Thank you
for all your comments!)
Your Peachiness (I
have got the epilogue – it's here J Thanks!)
And thanks to everyone else who's commented –
Cece, Dee, Eyrien, Katherine, Galli-vi, Ice Princess, Kate, Kirsty Marie, Millennia,
Nixa, Ria, Sapamfa, Starrika, Taito's Child, Water Angel, Wind Dancer and :o) –
you've all been wonderful, I have been totally knocked out!
Comments would be adored like summer days - revelled in, cherished, and fervently wished for! Please tell me what you think - I love hearing, all your comments and criticisms make the story what it is :-)
Nightfire Epilogue
No, no, no, no, this couldn't be happening,
not to him, not to her, not to them...he was burning in a haze of fire, turning
into ashes and powder. But then he realised it wasn't him, it was her, oh dear
gods, it was her, why couldn't it be him? Better that, better he should die
than she.
But it was her, and she was leaving him here.
The wolves clung
to Cern Akafren as he tried to get up, shouting her name, trying...why, please,
why wouldn't they let him go to her? Why?
And the pain snapped out, leaving him in a
floating golden haze. But he could feel the link, still breathing and pulsing.
A husky, unsteady voice. "Open your eyes,
witch boy. Your darlin' wants you."
He felt the wolves back away, whining.
Something was...wrong. It broke through the numbness, and he obeyed that voice.
For a moment, he saw nothing but blurred
outlines. Then...a silvery form, kneeling before him.
Jal.
Jal, with her face smooth and young and
heartbreaking. Saying words that he couldn't understand, and maybe that was
always how it had to be. And then she reached for him, her touch a cool flame
on his skin, and kissed him.
A wash of cold, and for one moment he *was*
Jal, screaming in a temple, running through a wood, sobbing in his arms, dying
for his love.
Breathe out, feel a part of himself drawn
into her. Breathe in, a rush of energy sinking into that part of him that was
not physical but spiritual. Breathe for breath, life for life, heartbeat for
heartbeat.
There was only the ocean-wash of their breath
and touch, the tremulous touch of her mouth, the fevered clutch of her hands
that tried to cling to him and failed because they were inches apart, but
worlds away.
Her love sank into him, melded with his
spirit as surely as she once had, as if he were a dream-catcher and she the
nightmare, destined to dissolve as his memories did.
And as he watched, she began to fade, the
sunlight catching through until she was only shimmers and gold.
He felt her slip
away, and felt anguish as a part of himself was cut away and taken with her,
doomed to trail hopelessly ever after the ghost of a golden girl with sweet and
sad crystal eyes. Part of him, condemned to call for a girl who would give no
answer, to wake up reaching for her and sleep yearning for her.
Only the remnants of her love were bitter in
his soul.
* * * *
Two weeks on:
Shadows.
They were so soft, so mysterious. Regarded as
darkness, yet without light they would never exist. They lay between the night
and the day, ghostly insubstantial things that grew and changed with the
movement of the world.
It amused Blue Malefici that so few people
realised that they were shadows.
He was watching one of them. Sitting among
her friends, with that long black hair as tightly controlled as her emotions as
she plaited it carefully.
"Malefici."
He half-turned at the voice, and nodded to
the boy who sat down. "How goes life?" he inquired lazily. "And more
importantly, death. Enjoying the summer?"
"Not as much as
you," the boy chimed eagerly. His eyes fixed on Blue with a hungry, morbid
interest. "Did it scream? Did you burn it slowly?"
Blue flicked his eyes to the boy for an
instant and it was enough to shut Aspen Martin up. Of the pair, he could pass
as human most easily, with only his eyes giving him away. They changed colour
from moment to moment but...both eyes were different colours. "Yes and no."
"Pity," Aspen said, sounding disappointed.
The vampire was
known for his attitude. While Blue was considered easy going, fun, a people
person, Aspen's crazy, uncontrollable moods had alienated everyone he had hit.
About half the school.
It was ironic, because of the pair of them,
they both knew Blue was the most dangerous.
He shrugged. "Pain stimulates some creatures.
I didn't want to find out if that girl was one of them. How goes Pursang?"
Aspen beamed. "Good as ever. Another three
Daybreakers dead, and the Asian Nightworld split by civil war. God, their
screams sounded so *go-od*..." There was a wildness to his eyes, something that
spoke of a rabid animal. "Don't need to ask what Nightfire's been up to. Reckon
I could have done it better though."
"As I recall," Blue drawled, "when Pursang
did come across Ms. ap Ganra, you stopped to paint a portrait of her. And left
a considerable amount of information."
"Not my fault," Aspen put in, rearranging his
brown hair so the three blond streaks sweeping back from his forehead showed
better. "That information was lost long before I ever got to the top. Anyway,
what about K'Shaia? They practically gave her tea and bloody biscuits!"
"Keep your voice down," Blue advised coolly.
"Therese doesn't want the name of her business spread all over town."
"Whatever," Aspen said carelessly. "What does
it matter if they know? We can just kill them."
"Metaphorically speaking," the lamia added, a
warning in his voice as people looked over. His eyes froze over, and Aspen
gulped, looking away.
"Yeah, well, that
information on ap Ganra or whatever the name was," he continued quietly, "was
lost before I came to power. If I find out who has it—"
"I think you'll find that's a vampire by the
name of Darkstar," Blue cut in, his face serene and innocent.
Aspen's drifting eyes focused for a moment.
"One day I'll find out how you do that," he remarked. His voice was carefully
neutral. "I'll bet even you react to torture."
"Play enough Backstreet Boys and I'll tell
you almost anything," Blue agreed dryly.
Aspen Martin traced a circle in the grass
with his index finger. Where it touched the ground, it left a charred black
trail. "I have some people near Darkstar's offices," he murmured. "I'll send
them in. So," he said in his light voice. "What is your unhealthy interest with
Circle Strange, that little group of outcasts?"
Blue smiled. "One of them defied me."
Aspen stared. It was a rare day when Blue
surprised him. It was time to start wearing body armour when he did it twice.
"What?" Aspen said, his fangs baring. "Very
funny, Malefici, now what do you really want with them?"
Blue turned his brilliant, disturbing smile
on him. "No joke. I warned her what would happen if she did. I gave her my
word."
Aspen's eyes glinted, hands bracing his body
as he leaned forward. The hungry look was back. "Can I watch while you tear her
apart?"
He felt the power swell from Blue. "Over your
dead body."
"Pity." The other vampire looked over at the
group. "Which one is it? The dragon? She's powerful. Or maybe the Ochai
girl...sure you don't want any help?" he pleaded, turning his large liquid eyes
to Blue. He couldn't quite meet the icy breaches.
"Oh no." The velvet dark in his voice was
soft, alluring. "This one is in for some very special treatment."
"Friends share," grumbled Aspen. "There's no
one round here you can torture."
Blue glanced at him. "What about all those
Nightpeople that have been going missing lately? Aren't they enough for you,
Aspen?"
The madness dimmed in his eyes. "That's not
me. Wish it was...whoever's killing them's doing a *fine* job." He drew out the
'fine', his voice a sigh. "I found a body...but they're hiding the rest well.
It stank of human. Can't we hunt them down? Maybe this weekend? I have a
garrotte I want to try out..."
Blue's eyes were shut as he relaxed. "I can
make some time."
He would destroy Chatoya Irkil.
And the best part of it was that she would
see what he was doing, but she would be powerless to stop him.
* * * *
"Oh gods, what happened to *you*?" Ria
exclaimed in horror when Jepar turned up. He had stitches in his head, and a graze all long one side of his face.
"Let me guess," Cougar said. "Either you and
Tali have been having S and M fun, or you told her about that stunt Ruby
pulled."
The shapeshifter sat down, unsmiling. "You'd
think she would have been a bit more forgiving," he remarked. "But she's okay
with it now. After I showed her that there wasn't a lot I could have done to
stop it." He frowned. "Whatever it was."
"How did you manage to get near enough?" Ria
appeared to be trying not to smile. Chatoya was relieved. There hadn't been
much to smile about lately.
Jepar's green eyes glittered briefly. "Well,
after she hit me with the silver candlestick – which I'm melting down
incidentally – she thought she might have killed me, so she kind of leant over
me, and I being the 'immoral, scheming blond' I am, took advantage of the fact
she wasn't holding a weapon."
"She knows you so well," was Cougar's input.
"Don't suppose you saw Akafren on your way over?"
The cheetah boy
shook his head, his face darkening. "Nope."
None of them had seen Cern.
A fortnight since Jal had died and
everything had changed beyond Chatoya's comprehension. They had waited, waited
for him, then waited for a message, then waited for anything. Finally, Donna
Ares had appeared at their door, with her face detached and hard.
"Think there's some things I better explain,"
she said, hovering outside the door, her sense of territory keeping her out of
Circle Strange's space. Even when they beckoned her in, wanting to hear
anything about what had happened since Cern left, chasing Blue and Jal, she
shook her head. "We're looking after your witch boy now."
"You?" Cougar had been openly sceptical. "No
offence, Donna, but we're his friends."
"Friends with soulmates, most of you. If it
was you, would you want to be here?" The emerald eyes had softened with
compassion as she saw their faces. "Oh, I don't reckon it'll be forever. But he
needs to be somewhere to think. There's wolf blood in that boy, and he's closer
to it now."
"Hunting helps," Jepar chimed in. She remembered
how the cheetah shifter had disappeared when his sister died, setting free his
anger in the only way he could. "Maybe it'll be good for him. For a while."
But a while had come and gone, and a week had
stretched into two weeks, and they hadn't even caught a glimpse of him.
Now, Jepar paused,
then said softly, "but I saw Lisa."
"How is she?" Chatoya said. What had happened
to Cern had hit Lisa harder than the rest of them. They had always been close
and this...it was crucifying her. It worried her to see the sadness in Lisa's
face, and the strange look that was in her eyes sometimes.
Jepar considered his answer for a moment.
"Angry. Seriously, completely furious."
"What? *Lisa*?"
The shapeshifter shrugged. "All she said was
'why won't he see?' and then stormed off."
Why won't he see...it sparked an idea that
had been floating around Chatoya's head for some time now, but she dismissed
it. Lisa had never been shy about showing her affections. Like the rest of
them, she was just worried sick.
* * * *
Lisa saw him falling apart and could do
nothing.
"Bring him back to us," she prayed. Bring him
back to me, she whispered in the depths of her soul.
She had met with the Pack so often lately,
trying to understand how she could help. But the Pack themselves were worried,
under that hard exterior and defensiveness. They saw him as Pack now, but they
weren't his Pack. She was, and Circle Strange was, however Cern might deny it.
The Pack had helped in the only way they
knew. Donna would try and haul him into the vibrant arguments she so often had.
Felicity would cook for him, and pretend she didn't see the weight he had lost,
the way he seemed almost translucent now. The only part of him that held any
substance was his eyes.
They were the eyes of someone letting
themselves drown.
He didn't look at
them anymore, but right through them. She had loved his smile once, fresh and
startling. Now she had to cling to the memory of his smile, because he was
wreathed in sorrow. Becoming a ghost, a ghost of a person, chasing after a girl
with the sun in her hair and the night in her heart.
And she had had enough. It hurt to be near
him, but it hurt even more to be far from him and to know he suffered so.
The Pack nodded to
her as she strode into their woodland haunt, which looked something like a
kid's den, only on a large scale. "Try the clearing," Donna said briefly. "But
I don't think he'll listen to you. He ain't listening to us."
Well, he'll damn well listen to *me*, Lisa
thought. She had left him alone, and she knew that a fortnight was scarce time
to mourn, but this wasn't mourning. This was suicide. He was killing himself
slowly, and she wouldn't stand back this time and let it happen.
She found him staring at the scorched ground,
all that remained of Jallakri ap Ganra. She caught her breath at how pale he
had gotten, how lean his face was now.
"What are you doing?" she said aloud, sadly.
He didn't turn. "Go away."
"No." Silence, long silence while she walked
to stand beside him. "Please stop this."
"Stop what?" he said bitterly.
She turned and looked at his eyes, that soft
bruised colour, and hurt. "Don't play games with me. You think Jal would have
wanted this?"
"You didn't like her," he said with startling
perceptiveness. That rock-hard stare turned on her, but she met the pain of his
stare. Lisa found herself off-guard, without a glib answer or an easy
diversion. "Why?"
She floundered. What to say? The old lies
wouldn't spring to her mind under his eyes. Finally, she could only answer with
the truth, because he would know anything else was a lie. "I knew what she
was."
Raw shock made his face gaunt. "What? How?
Why didn't you..."
"The same way Donna knew you were a werewolf
when you met her," she answered. "The same way Tali can know other dragons.
It's just like they say...it takes one to know one."
"You're..." She had startled him from that
numbness, and was glad, even though it tore savagely at her to see that what
replaced it was horror.
"Not exactly," she said calmly. "But we're
both creations of Nightfire. We're only what we're made to be."
"But you're thirty," he whispered, the first
quiver of life rippling through his eyes. If the confession of her very soul
would bring back his smile, she would bare it to the world.
"I lied."
"Why?"
"The same reasons Jal did. I was scared. I
didn't know what she was exactly until the hunter's moon. But I knew she
was...like me. Someone changed her soul a long time ago with magick." She
dropped her eyes. Still the same shame for what she was. "I...escaped. I was
lucky. Others weren't." She looked at him and what she saw made her press a
hand to her mouth so he wouldn't see she was trying not to cry. "Please don't
hate me."
"I couldn't hate her," he murmured and smiled
tiredly. The anguish was there. "How can I hate you?" He fell silent for a
moment, but then said, "I'm just lost without her. Why does it hurt? How can
anything hurt like this? Did I just forget? I remember how it was when Becky
died, but..."
"It's not just her
this time," she said. "it's you too. Please, Cern...don't stay with the Pack.
Even if you don't want to see any of the others, they're worried. If it hurts
to be around them, at least see the rest of us."
He looked at his friend, who was pleading
with him, begging him, and thought of what Jal had said to him. He had tried
not to think about her, because it only brought back those moments that fell
away like a castle of sand beneath the tide.
~ There's peace for you, ~ she had said. ~
You just didn't see it. ~
So here he was. With this choice again. She
had chosen the dark. And he could choose that too, and hope...hope she would be
there, waiting. Standing on the desert sands, like he dreamed her every night,
with her hair loose and wild in the wind, waiting for him. But he knew it was
never real. It was never her, only the wishes his mind made
Or this. He knew what Jal would have wanted.
He walked out of the clearing that day, and
back to his Pack. And he hoped that somewhere, that girl who had once told him
that he was her moon, that she would howl for him in the endless night, that
girl was watching him, and smiling.
That night, he
dreamed he saw her, running across a desert land with a pack of wolves,
beautiful and brilliant in the endless night. It was her, he felt her spirit,
clean and strong in the world she belonged to.
Wolves that ran towards safety, towards the
shelter from the morning sun. He called her name and she stopped, drawing away
from the Pack, her body rippling felinely until the girl with the sunfire hair
and ice-crystal eyes stood on the sands.
She turned and looked towards him and it
seemed that she smiled and in that moment, she was his, only and always his.
And then the sun rose.
She threw her head back and screamed as the
sands leapt up around her and became flames. He understood that he would always
lose her this way, she would always be consumed by the sun's fire. That she
would never be his for longer than that fleeting moment.
She was gone.
He would never forget her.
* * * *
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