When Lux Lisbon walked through the door with a bong toting Trip Fontaine wrapping himself around her shoulders like the protective older boyfriend that he was, Jackie Burkhardt decided that she had seen it all. Nothing could surprise Jackie anymore, nothing. Whether it be that Kelso really wasn't the one she was supposed to marry, or finding out that her second best friend, Brandy, was really a popular porn star named Rollergirl, or even something as absurd as Trip Fontaine, the most popular guy in school, dating someone as wretched as Lux Lisbon……nothing could or would ever surprise her again.
Brandy wasn't surprised, or at least didn't show it in the way she was acting. Brandy said the reason she was always so calm and relaxed is because she has so much sex at her job, but Jackie really thought it was because she smoked a little to much of the same stuff that Jackie, Donna, Eric, Kelso, Hyde, and Fez used to smoke. Jackie knew Brandy had problems, and as a a friend she knew she should help her with them, but whenever Jackie even mentioned about the drugs or the porn, Brandy would flip out.
Trip made a point to strut past Jackie with Lux on his arm. Jackie tried to act unfazed but tact never was one of the vocabulary words Jackie had known on the test. Jackie gasped and ran over to speak with Brandy. They both agreed that Trip was becoming more of an ass whole than Kelso. At least Kelso remembered what a great lay, er, girlfriend, Jackie had been. Trip on the other hand, remembered none of the good times and just wanted to shove Lux in Jackie's face.
Jackie would not be treated this way! He could not shove a rag doll bitch like Lux Lisbon in her face! He was going to pay and he was going to pay tonight. Jackie, backed up by Brandy in one of her sexy, porn outfits, confronted Trip and Lux in front of everyone. Jackie simply asked Trip why he was trying to hurt her, and of course he pretended like he had no idea what she was talking about. Brandy commented on Lux's family, and how the youngest of the Lisbon sisters had killed herself, and Lux simply smiled at Brandy. Trip and Lux quickly left, and so did Jackie's "good" night.
Brandy tried to cheer up Jackie, but Jackie was too distressed. Brandy invited Jackie to come to one of her porn shoots and Jackie decided to go. Jackie decided she would no longer sit and cry over Trip or Kelso any longer. Jackie got to the set of the porno and immediately charmed everyone. The lead of the movie, Dirk something, especially liked her. Soon Jackie was "involved" with Dirk whatever his last name was. Jackie loved Dirk. Dirk loved Jackie. Dirk bought 5 mil plus ring. Jackie loved 5 mil plus ring. Soon Dirk and Jackie where engaged! Jackie now would strut Dirk around in front of Trip who was still running track in high school and living with his dad and his dad's boyfriend, and in front of Kelso who was still lusting after Eric Foreman's older sister, what was her name again? Slut.The bottom line is this: Jackie didn't regret a thing. There are three consecutive chapters too her very crazy sagas: The Terrible Tweens (Trip), The Lusty Lovers Lulliby (Kelso), and The Jaded Marriage (Dirk). While Jackie might be a little crazy sometimes, I promise, it all has a patented happily ever after at the end.
I know this is crazy and badly written, but it was inspired. HAHAHAHAH
Brandy wasn't surprised, or at least didn't show it in the way she was acting. Brandy said the reason she was always so calm and relaxed is because she has so much sex at her job, but Jackie really thought it was because she smoked a little to much of the same stuff that Jackie, Donna, Eric, Kelso, Hyde, and Fez used to smoke. Jackie knew Brandy had problems, and as a a friend she knew she should help her with them, but whenever Jackie even mentioned about the drugs or the porn, Brandy would flip out.
Trip made a point to strut past Jackie with Lux on his arm. Jackie tried to act unfazed but tact never was one of the vocabulary words Jackie had known on the test. Jackie gasped and ran over to speak with Brandy. They both agreed that Trip was becoming more of an ass whole than Kelso. At least Kelso remembered what a great lay, er, girlfriend, Jackie had been. Trip on the other hand, remembered none of the good times and just wanted to shove Lux in Jackie's face.
Jackie would not be treated this way! He could not shove a rag doll bitch like Lux Lisbon in her face! He was going to pay and he was going to pay tonight. Jackie, backed up by Brandy in one of her sexy, porn outfits, confronted Trip and Lux in front of everyone. Jackie simply asked Trip why he was trying to hurt her, and of course he pretended like he had no idea what she was talking about. Brandy commented on Lux's family, and how the youngest of the Lisbon sisters had killed herself, and Lux simply smiled at Brandy. Trip and Lux quickly left, and so did Jackie's "good" night.
Brandy tried to cheer up Jackie, but Jackie was too distressed. Brandy invited Jackie to come to one of her porn shoots and Jackie decided to go. Jackie decided she would no longer sit and cry over Trip or Kelso any longer. Jackie got to the set of the porno and immediately charmed everyone. The lead of the movie, Dirk something, especially liked her. Soon Jackie was "involved" with Dirk whatever his last name was. Jackie loved Dirk. Dirk loved Jackie. Dirk bought 5 mil plus ring. Jackie loved 5 mil plus ring. Soon Dirk and Jackie where engaged! Jackie now would strut Dirk around in front of Trip who was still running track in high school and living with his dad and his dad's boyfriend, and in front of Kelso who was still lusting after Eric Foreman's older sister, what was her name again? Slut.The bottom line is this: Jackie didn't regret a thing. There are three consecutive chapters too her very crazy sagas: The Terrible Tweens (Trip), The Lusty Lovers Lulliby (Kelso), and The Jaded Marriage (Dirk). While Jackie might be a little crazy sometimes, I promise, it all has a patented happily ever after at the end.
I know this is crazy and badly written, but it was inspired. HAHAHAHAH
