Death Wish by Miss Binks
E-mail:
stacey_jill@hotmail.com
Rating: NC- 17
Description: Alternate conclusion to the events in
Crush. Spike gets sick of Buffy's coldness
and vows revenge.
Warning: This fic. contains violence and major
character death. This is not for the
feint of heart.
Thanks
go to my wonderful beta team for their tons of helpful advice: Cestruma,
Richess, Ginny, and Kate
Disclaimer:
Buffy, Spike, et al. belong to Joss and Mutant Enemy.
Spoilers: Season Five. This story
starts at the end of Crush and basically assumes that the following episodes
never happened. Obviously.
Archive: Anywhere,
just let me know where his fic is heading.
Feedback: Please, must I beg? O.K.
Pleeeeese!
Chapter Five
Spike was kneeling next to her,
smirking as Buffy felt the blood from her shattered face run down her neck and
stain her shirt.
"Remember, Buffy, when I told you
about the other Slayers I'd done. That
the minute you felt that death wish, that I would slip it in. Well, this is turning out to be a very good
day."
Buffy struggled again, trying desperately
to break the bonds that held her. Spike
grinned at her movements. "What did you
say? That I was beneath you?" Spike pushed her down so that she was lying
on her back, her handcuffed arms twisted painfully beneath her. Spike moved over her, straddling her, and
pinning her down.
Spike leaned over Buffy's wiggling
body and kissed her, forcing her lips open and thrusting his tongue in between
her teeth. Buffy bit down on his tongue
with all her might, laughing as she felt the demon's blood hit her face. Spike screamed in anger and slapped the
Slayer, the blood from her nose mixing with the blood from Spike's mouth. Spike leaned down and licked Buffy's face,
loving the taste of their blood mingling.
"Should have known that you would
fight until the end. But all the
fighting in the world isn't going to help you now. You are going to die. I
told you that I was going to make your neck my chalice. Now to drink deep."
Spike moved her hair away from
Buffy's neck, exposing the pulsing vein.
Spike leaned down, placing his hands on her shoulders. He placed his head at the crook between her
neck and shoulder, and breathed in deep, smelling her sweat and the smell of
her fear. He tasted her, tracing a line
with his tongue along her collarbone and up the throbbing jugular. She was salty and slightly sweet, and he
reveled the sheer pleasure of her trembling body.
"Please, Spike. Don't do this."
"Now Buffy, don't beg. It is so unbecoming of a Slayer. You should go to your death strong." Spike leaned towards her again, hearing the
pulsing beat of her heart drumming inside her slender chest. Buffy struggled, raising her hips off the
floor, trying desperately to throw Spike off.
Spike rode out her struggles and laughed.
"Yeah, Slayer. That is how to make it really fun." Spike ground his hips into Buffy's and she
could feel his hardness encased in the black jeans. Somehow, feeling how much her pain turned him on broke her. She started crying, her tears running off
her face and down her neck. Until now,
she had truly believed that she would live through this, but she had lost the
last bit of hope that she had.
"I am going to die." Buffy sobbed, her voice ringing off the
tight concrete walls.
"No, Buffy, you are not going to
die. Well, you are not going to stay
dead."
With Spike's words, Buffy's eyes
opened wide. ""No, you can't. I won't let you. I'll stake myself."
"But see love, you won't. I can see it in you, the demon. You love the hunt, the kill. You are just like us. You are going to be the most magnificent
vampire the world has ever seen. You
will rule by my side and there won't be a corner of this shitty planet that
will be safe from us."
"Must you be such a pompous bastard,
Spike. Do it, kill me. Put me out of my misery. Don't make me listen to you any
longer." Buffy shut her panic down deep
inside her. He could kill her, but at
least she would go down fighting.
"Bitch." Spike slapped her again, making Buffy's head ring and throb. The pain in her face was terrible, she was
sure that her jaw was broken, but she still managed to say one more thing.
"If you turn me, Spike, what makes
you think that I would want to spend the rest of my days with a miserable piece
of shit vampire like yourself." Buffy
choked out the words, and then spit on Spike's face, leaving a trail of spit
and blood on his face.
"You fucking bitch. I am really going to enjoy watching you
die. But I am too smart for you. You're trying to piss me off, so that I'll
just kill you and not turn you. It's
not going to work, luv."
Spike returned his face to her neck,
breathing in her scent, tasting her salty skin. He licked her jaw, shuddering as the waves of excitement began to
pour through his body. The Slayer began
to struggle, but he pinned her down, roughly grabbing her. He looked at her neck and saw the twin
scars, Angel and Dracula. He was angry
that they had gotten to her first, but elated that he would be the one to go where
neither of them had been willing or able to go. With one swift move, fastened his mouth over her pulsating
vein. She screamed as he slipped the
sharp fangs into the fragile skin, and he moaned as the first drops of blood
landed on his tongue. He forced himself
to drink slowly and to saver each russet drop.
He lay on top of her, feeling her tiny body struggle against him,
hearing her heart pounding in his head.
He drank as the two sensations began to fade as her heart slowed and her
body lay still. He continued drinking
her, feeling the hot blood race through his dead body, enlivening it and adding
to his power. The blood of the Slayer
was so powerful he nearly swooned, and he fought to keep his head so that he
could finish what he had started.
As her breathing began to slow, he
knew that the moment had come, that time just before death, when she was
ready. Spike sat back and looked at the
Slayer, lying beneath him, struggling to remain conscious and felt a small stab
of guilt. He lovingly traced his
fingertips along her cheek, feeling the warm smooth skin that would soon turn
cold and hard. Buffy opened her eyes
and looked at Spike, her mouth struggling to form words. Spike leaned down to hear the barely audible
words.
"Spike, if you ever loved me, ever at
all, kill me. Don't turn me into
something that I have spent my life hating.
Please, I can't live that way.
Don't make my friends and family have to hunt me. Don't make Dawn's big sister into a monster.
Please, kill me."
Spike met the Slayer's eyes as the
tears welled in their hazel depths and then spilled out along her cheeks. His chest tightened at the sight of her pain
and at the thought of her joining the undead.
For the first time since she had slammed the door in his face, Spike
felt the cloud of fury leave him and a sliver of doubt take its place. He had been so sure that this was what he
had to do to get his revenge on the Slayer.
But he had never thought that at the last moment he would question the
decision.
He looked at the face that he had
spent the last few months adoring from afar.
The Slayer lay in the muck of the sewer, her hair matted and her
clothing ripped and dirty. Her neck was
covered in her own blood and her face was bruised and swollen. She had never looked so beautiful. She pleaded with him, using only her
eyes. She had lost the last of the
energy needed to form words. He looked
at her, those beautiful eyes filled with tears and some part of his heart
shattered. The thought of her waking
without a heartbeat now seemed to be the most horrific concept in the
word. He had loved this woman, and he
found that in the end, he could not ignore her dying wish.
Spike moved off Buffy and sat beside
her, took her hand and placed it in his.
He looked down, smoothed the wisp of hair from her face, and tilted her
head so that she could see his eyes.
"Ahh Buffy. I can't do it. I can't
turn you into something that you hate; I can't make you into me. I am sorry for what I have done, bringing
you here, but you have my word that when you close your eyes as your heart
stops, you will never open them again."
He sat there, holding her hand, and
he talked to her. He told her about the
man that he had been, and the vampire that he had become. He talked to her about Drusilla and Angel,
and he listened to the sound of her heart pounding slower and slower. Her heart was incredibly strong. It beat for much longer than a normal
human's would have, but in the end, the loss of blood was to great for her
Slayer healing powers to overcome. He
heard the last beat and he waited in the silence of the sewers for
another.
When the silent moment stretched into
two, he knew that she had slipped away.
He sat there for a moment or two, still holding her chilling hand and
thought of the Slayer that was now being Chosen. He had spent his unlife searching for Slayers to kill, but this
one, the Slayer that he had loved was his last. He would never again seek the Chosen One. He picked up Buffy's body and cradling it in
his arms, walked out of the tunnel. He
carried the girl up out of the sewers and out into the fresh night air. His mind recalled the moments that they had
shared; the defeat of Angelus, the many fights, the times that they had worked
together to protect Dawn. While his mind
reveled in the past, his feet seemed to know where to go. He found himself walking out of the
cemetery, down Main Street and to the door of the Magic Box. He kicked open the door and walked in,
placing Buffy's body on the table. He
heard the first sobs of the witches, and the incredulous screams of
Xander.
Spike stood there, remembering the
time that Red had cursed them, the feeling of Buffy's lips on his, the joy that
he had felt when she answered his question yes. He was remembering how she felt in his arms as her Watcher shoved
him back against the bookcases, the stake in his hand poised above his
heart. As he felt the sharp point enter
his chest he whispered, "I love you, Buffy."
The last thing that Spike saw before he turned to dust was the open,
unseeing eyes of the Slayer, staring at him from the table. Then he closed his eyes and accepted his
fate.
The End
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