A Day at the Confessional
by Strawberriee

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Chapter Two:
Asking Carter

We now see Jack skipping his way to the church.

Cliff: Why you so happy?

Jack: I'm following the red brick road to the confessional.

Cliff: Confessional? I didn't know you were into that crud.

Jack: Now I am. I have things to talk about. (Continues to skip)

Finally Jack reaches the church. He barges in then opens the door to the confessional.

Mystery Voice: Hello, Jack. Never see you around here.. (Laughs evilly)

Jack: Shut up Carter I know it is you.

Carter: So you have anything to confess?

Jack: Lotsa stuff. In fact it'll take hours to finish.

Carter: Cool. Nobody, besides Mary, ever comes here anymore.

Jack: Well here's a ¢25 tip.

Carter: Thanks.. a lot..

Jack: First let's talk about you.

Carter: Hey, who's the boss?

Jack: Me. Now, do you belong to the famous Carter family?

Carter: Carter is not my last name. It is my first.

Jack: Liar! Liar! I object!

Carter: This is not court you shitface.

Jack: Oh yeah. Well do you? Is Aaron and Nick Carter your brothers, and Leslie Carter
your sister?

Carter: No! Carter is my first name! I'm from the Keller family!

Jack: Carter Keller? Sounds funny. How do you feel about Helen Keller being your
deaf and blind mother?

Carter: She was my great-great-grandma.

Jack: Oh really, and I work for Kelloggs.

Carter: Really?!

Jack: Oh shut the hell up.

Carter: I am the one who is supposed to ask you questions.

Jack: Me first. I am much younger than you, and therefore handsome.

Carter: Alright..

Jack: Have you ever had any diseases?

Carter: Yup. AIDS, rabies, flesh eating disease..

Jack: You're a cannibal?

Carter: Not that kind of flesh! I mean from a cow!

Jack: ... so you're a cannibal.

Carter: No! I mean cooked cow! Steak!

Jack: How did you survive from AIDS?

Carter: I drank wine, snorted tobacco, and kicked my ass.

Jack: That should go out to all the poor and helpless people out there with AIDS.

A/N: Do not try this.

Carter: Yup yup yup.

Jack: But how did you get it?

Carter: Needles. Tatoos. Sex. All the pretty things that vex.

Jack: Shut the hell up before I whip you upside the head with my belt.

Carter: Oh my god! What smells?

Jack: Your rabies. (Pause) Ew, Carter! Did you..

Carter: NO!

Jack: Lol. It is fun to tease you.

Carter: I have to take a dump.

A/N: Just imagine as if it were happening in BTN. And make sure you're also imagining
Jack talks.