Osamu-chan

Okay...I'm depressed, shocked and high on chocolate. My muses are craziest as ever. They've made me work on dozens of fic at the same time. -_-;;

So, be warned. This fic is *STRANGE*.

I think no one ever came out with something like this...I think that's the first fic ever were ((SPOILER DELETED)) loves Dai, but I'm not sure ^^;;

Anyway, not edited ((just as always)) I'm sorry for eventual errors...this takes place after the episode 2, when Dai sees the Kaiser for the first time...and gets a hell of a shock, 'cause he remembers something from his past.

I don't know where this is headed, I've few confused ideas about how the next chapters could come out...but I fear you won't have more of this very soon ^^;; ::jerks thumb to point her muses behind her shoulders:: They're too excited to make me focus on a single fic at time!!!!

I hope ya'll like it!!

::winks:: and comments are always gladly welcomed ::winks::

Ja!!!

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Osamu-chan Chapter 1
 

Daisuke ran thought the snow field, the chill wind whipping his flushed cheeks. He was blinded by his own despair, his how rage…

His own…tears.

Because it didn't matter how he tried to forget them, to deny their existence, the way they were burning in his chocolate brown eyes, they were there. Burning, stinging, and blurring his vision so that his surroundings were now reduced to blur shadows, mere shapes and unfocused spots of colors.

He kept running, quivering teardrops cascading out his eyes and down his cheeks in hot rivulets. Left and Right. Up and down. Forward and backward. Direction and spaces had lost their meaning and all that mattered was all the white surrounding him. As the mahogany hair teen continued to rush through the snow without a place to go, nothing seemed to matter anymore. Life, friendship, destiny, duty…

Love.

What's real?

What's fake?

What's reality and what's fantasy?

Where's reality?

Why is it *so* painful?

Why me…?

Why him…?

Why us?

Why now?

Unable to find answers to the dozens questions swirling inside his confused mind, Daisuke closed his eyes, his breath coming in burning gasps; his legs screaming; his lungs burning; his hair plastered to his face in wet tendrils.

Nowhere was his destination.

Nowhere was where he came from.

Nobody was his name at that moment.

Nothing was what he could see.

What he could hear.

Taste.

Smell.

'No more' was his pray.

Nowhere was where he came from.

Nowhere was his destination.

Forward was everywhere his leg could carry him.

Completely overwhelmed, he ran all the faster, confused, and angry. With both himself and him.

Why him of all the people had had to be his enemy?

Him, whose quiet voice had lullabied him to sleep countless times?

Him, whose face filled his every dream and nightmare?

Him, whose violet eyes glowed in the deepest corner of his heart?

Him, whose pale, slender fingers had clasped so many times around his tanned ones?

Him…

The coldness biting his soul together with his flesh, his mind began to wander and he was asking himself if he could stop.

If he should stop.

If he cold *ever* be able to stop.

His freezing legs quite suddenly gave out of him, deciding after their own will it was time for him to come to an halt. And so the tan skinned boy fell to his knees in the snow, hot streams of burning moisture tracing their way down his cheeks.

He suddenly looked up at the dark sky above, usually warm eyes squinted in sorrow.

"That's not fair!!" He yelled to the blue, the hollow of the wind joining his into a cry spiraling toward the sky.

"That's not fair!!" he cried, tight fists waving in the cold air. "Why did you have to leave me only to come back in my life as my enemy?!" he let out all his sorrow, hollowing to the full moon and the countless stars blinking teasingly in the liquid blue of the sky. He shot up, wanting nothing but the pain to stop. "Is this worth all this pain?! All this loneliness?!" he shouted. "Can you ear me?! Where are you?! Digimon Kaiser!! Digimon Kaiseeeeeeeeeer!!!!!!!!!"

The digidestined's supposed leader slumped down in a fresh layer of snow, where he curled into a foetal position, not even trying to stop the tears anymore. "I…hate you…" he breathed.

//…I'm a liar…//

"I hate you…"

//…My mind's empty…I don't know what I feel anymore…all this pain…all this *pain*…to make it stop…//

"Digimon…"

//I just have to…//

"…Kaiser…"

//Say…//

"I…"

//…the opposite…of what's…inside…my heart.//

"hate…you."

//I love you. //

He shook stubbornly his head. "…I don't…"

//That's why I'm telling over and over that I hate you. Because I love you. I can't love you. But I won't stop. You don't love me, though. But you did. Dirt words. Bitter words. False words. That's everything I have to crush this feelings. I've to destroy them. Forget you. So that our hearts won't be united anymore. Just say it. And then it will be true.//

"I do. I hate you."

//…//

"Digimon…Kaiser…"

//…//

"…"

//…//

"…"

//…I…//

"…I…"

//"…love you."//

Daisuke chocked out a little sob, pulling his legs closer to his chest and wrapping his arms around them. He was shivering, out of coldness and of pain. And the tears seemed unable –unwilling-- to stop their rush down his flushed cheeks. He wept softly, chewing his bottom lip to prevent his sobs to get louder.

Slowly, ever so slowly, his sobs quietened, his shivers subdued and his vise-like grip around his half-frozen legs softened.

The cinnamon-haired boy allowed himself to stand up on his knees. Then he sat down, bringing his knees close to his chest and hiding his face on them.

When Daisuke looked up, it was for the soft noise of snow cracking under a boot. He looked around with a frown creasing his lips, and saw nothing but snow. Snow and snow everywhere. A movement in the corner of his eyes caught his attention, then. And when he looked over, his eyes made contact with a pair of deep blue ones, hid behind purple shades.

"You…" Despite all his efforts, his voice was trembling; and so were his legs when he stood up.

"Me." The violet-haired boy in front of him said, his lips curving up into a sneer. "Oh…" he added after a pause, cocking his head to one side. "See what the storm brought here. My, isn't this the digidestined's leader?" his eyes widened briefly in mock-surprise and his usual cruel smirk tugged up the corners of his lips when the twins pools of blue narrowed. "Such an honour. And such an unexpected luck. What does bring you here? Did you whish to die, daring to enter my garden? Or were you simply trying to make a fool of yourself challenging me alone?"

Purplish blue spikes danced around in the cold wind as he tossed his head again. "So? Cat got your tongue, digidestined? What are you doing here, other than enjoying the cold and wasting my time? Where you planning something to trick and defeat me?"

Daisuke shook slightly his head, his eyes flickering down to the snow and then up the face just as pale in front of him.

"…we've got to talk."

"Us?" the purple-haired tyrant shook slowly his head. "I fear you didn't catch the rules of the game, digidestined. I ask questions, you answer them. If you don't or if your answer displease me…" his whip sneaked forward, snapping in the frozen air. "…you suffer."

"We've got to talk." The darker skinned boy repeated, his voice cold and low. The Kaiser shook his head once again and opened his mouth. Whatever he wanted to say remained unspoken, however, because Daisuke's next words left him speechless.

"Why did you left me?" Half chocked, cracked by a soft sob, but strengthened by a unsubtle pain which demanded to be lessened, the words made their way to the very core dark-haired boy's being.

Purple eyes flickered up and regarded the boy in front of them with a stare rippled by confusion and surprise.

"…I…" For once, the cruel tyrant, the boy known for his smart remarks, was a loss of words.

"I thought…" Daisuke whispered, his eyes softening visibly. "that you cared." He ended in a breath, causing the other boy to recoil a step backward.

"…That…I…cared?" the boy said, testing the words, tasting them even. Letting them roll down his tongue experimentally. The thought, the *simple* thought to care for another creature was completely absurd. Ridiculous. In a world where no one truly cares for anyone, where the ones who claim to love someone then just turn their shoulders to them in the moment of need, why would someone like *him* - an elect, a genius - care to…care? To Love?

But in a way…it was…warm. To imagine to hold someone and comfort them. To care for and cherish, to keep and love.

Confused, the Kaiser stepped back, but Daisuke took forward just as many steps as he did backward, so that they were still as far as before. "You *cared* for me once, didn't you?"

Shacking his confusion off his head, the digimon Kaiser balled his fists and snapped:

"Somehow I find this very hard to believe, digidestined."

"YOU *CARED*!!" Daisuke cried, his voice holding such a desperation which make the Kaiser retreat another step. "You *cared*…those couldn't be all lies…" the slight shorter boy paused, closing his pain-filled eyes and enjoying the feel of the cool breeze brushing over the bare skin of his legs, neck and cheeks. "I could see it was all true…I could see it in your eyes…" his eyes cracked open then, and he looked through an half-lidded gaze to his former enemy.

The Kaiser licked his lips, taking yet another step backward. His usual untouchable, cold and tough façade was gone. His shield shattered, he felt helpless, hold down in his spot by Daisuke's piercing gaze. He would have normally screamed at him, mocked him, but his eyes –those wonderful, warm eyes- didn't let him even *think* clearly, less him use his usual cold behavior. Taken aback, he shook his head, randomly linking this feeling of helplessly to what he felt the day Osamu died.

Daisuke doubted his judgment most of the times. But he was sure, painfully sure, that the boy in front of him cared. That all the moments shared, the words whispered, weren't lies. That's why he kept coming closer and closer to the still retreating boy. But the Kaiser's eyes, those wonderful, amethyst eyes, so clearly scared and confused, even behind the heavy shades, told him something was wrong and he reached a sudden halt.

"You…" Daisuke licked his dry lips. "you…don't you remember?"

Ken blinked several times, quickly, his mouth slight open and in search for words.

Remember?

Remember what?

All he could remember right then, was the infinite despair, emptiness and rage he had felt when Osamu died. Ken couldn't believe it had happened three years before, it seemed like yesterday. His, brother, his idol, his role-model. Despite all the times he had whished him to go away, Ken thought he could say he had loved him.

He had surely admired him, in a way words can't even began to describe. But he had hated him too; so deeply, with such power and passion, it could never be explained. He had hated his brother for all the things that he had took away from him. From the love of their parents, to the simple capacity to let people acknowledge his existence, he had stolen him countless, priceless things he'll never be able to replace. In a way, he became his God. There was no one he looked up to more, and Ken would have done anything to obtain his approval and his respect. To prove to himself and to the whole world that 'Osamu's little brother' wasn't just a shadow of his unbelievably wonderful brother. That he was real. The he was strong. He would do anything to prove them all how powerful and capable he was.

Anything.

Wear a purple jumpsuit, and a rather intimidating cape; provide himself with a whip and spike his hair and wear a pair of glasses just to look like his brother was only the first step. Enslave digimon and establish a reign of terror was the second one. The second of a long series of steps. Some littler, some longer. Some more difficult to perform, some easy and relaxing. But nevertheless, that was just the beginning. The beginning of a journey that would lead him to a sanctuary higher that Osamu's, where his light could glow, untarnished and brighter that his bother's one, to blind every fool who would dare to look directly at him.

And that wouldn't be the end either. He would gain all the respect Osamu had. All the love, the attentions, the admiration and consideration. All things that should have been his on the first place and that his brother had stolen.

And once he would reach the end of his journey, the top of this staircase of bloodstained steps, there would be no one to remember Osamu anymore. After taking all that has ever been his, he would be whole. And there wouldn't be any Osamu anymore, or any 'Osamu's little brother', any Ken. There would be only the Digimon Kaiser. Genius. God. Ruler. Which would have his due, everything he needed, everything that he could dream of.

And that included everything that had been Osamu's.

Snapped out of his dreadful thinking by the cracking sound of Daisuke's feet stomping over the fresh snow, the Kaiser's head snapped upward and he took a step backward, only to find his back against a three.

"Don't you remember?" the cinnamon haired boy asked, voice soft and pleading. "The day we first met? When you saved me from those bullies who wanted to hurt me only because I had stopped them form hitting a poor puppy?"

Ken blinked, mouth dropping open. Saved him? Bullies? Puppy?! What the…?!

"They were beating him to death, but I protected him, so they ended up beating me…" he said, placing an hand on his chest as he stepped closer. Cornered, the Kaiser could only watch, numbed, as the other boy came tentatively closer. "but you showed up then, and chased them away. And then you took care of my wounds, and let me cry on your shirt."

Ken shook his head. What was this fool saying? That was all a nonsense! He opened his mouth to say so, but once again he was reduced to silence by the steady flame burning inside Daisuke's eyes. He wasn't lying.

He wasn't.

But Ken *knew* nothing of all that had ever happened.

Then what…?

"And you said you would be with me always. You called me 'your Dai-chan' and always said I would be yours and yours only for all the eternity." His voice held an edge of desperation as he stepped even closer, his eyes never leaving Ken's. "And you where there for me every time my mother yelled at me, every time my father abused me. Every time I needed you, you were there. You comforted me, hugged me and rocked me to sleep."

Ken shook his head again, slower this time, not daring to keep his eyes off Daisuke's. "And you used to take me to the shore, where we would watch the ocean and play with the seagulls, and laugh until our sides hurt. And we used to walk under the rain, 'cause you said it purifies men."

Ken's shoulders jumped and he sucked in a soundly breath. He remembered *this*…

//Watch the rain Ken. Don't ran from it. Don't hide. Come out, and let this little drops wash away the dirt that's inside you. Rain purifies men, Ken. Let it purify you.//

The Kaiser shook his head, not quite remembering *where* and *when* he had heard this words, or *who* told them to him, but he was certain he had heard them somewhere, somehow. Head cast downward, his eyes flickered up and he looked at Daisuke through his lashes. The boy nodded, smiling hopefully, acknowledging Ken's reaction as a sign of recognition.

"Yes." He whispered. And Ken, trapped between the trunk and Daisuke, whose gaze was shining with determination and hope mixed with something else that he couldn't put his finger on, felt his breath catch in his throat. "and we used to play tag in the park till there was enough light to see, and then you would hold me and walk me home. And you'd kiss me on my cheek and whisper to me everything would be alright, 'cause life's just a bubble of soap." He said, and reached up to trace softly the line of the Kaiser's tightly set jaw with one finger.

//Life's but a bubble of soap, Ken. It's carried around by every breeze. Even the softer one can make it spun, fly higher or descend. And those breezes can be joyful ones or mournful ones. But always remember this, Ken: no matter how down your bubble will be flown by the chill wind of sadness, there will always be a soft breeze of happiness ready to make it float higher.//

A soft gasp slid out Ken's mouth as he watched, dumbfounded, as Daisuke stepped even closer and pressed his body against his, his head on his shoulder. He looked down at Daisuke's brown head, his mind racing. It couldn't be…But it had to be. There weren't any other explanations to this.

"Dai…chan…?" he asked tentatively, swallowing the sudden lump searing his throat.

"Yes…" the other whispered softly, nodding slowly his head. His surprisingly soft spikes were tickling Ken's neck, but soon the faint brush was replaced by the much warmer and intimate sensation of moist, warm lips raining gentle kisses on the softness of his neck.

Ken gasped softly, not quiet sure about how to react, but surely liking the sensation chasing their way inside his body beyond belief, and wanting more and more with every touch of his sweet lips. His arm sneaked around Daisuke's waist to crush their bodies one against the other, while his other hand waltzed up the length of Daisuke back, to tangle in his short hair and press his head closer to his neck. His action earned him a gentle bite and he purred softly, his hips beginning to rock ever so

slowly against Daisuke.

"My Dai-chan…" he said slowly, measuring every world. "mine and mine only for all the eternity…"

Daisuke smiled, not stopping his mouth to feast on the Kaiser's soft flesh. His hands danced down his former enemy's sides, and he used all his strength to press him to the three behind them. "Yes" he murmured through kisses. "Yours."

Ken moaned softly, loving the way the sensation of their bodies touching. "Dai-chan…" he whispered, his nails tracing senseless figures on the other boys' back. He soon found the gap between his shirt and his oversized short. He smirked, letting one hand run under his shirt to continue his backrub without the heavy fabric of both his flame blazed jacket and his shirt to get in the way. His other hand disentangled from Daisuke's hair and waltzed down in a fluid, seductive movement, remembering to trace lazy, big circles all the way down the length of Daisuke's back. When it reached the waistband of his shorts it stopped, and sneaked under the soft fabric, to reach down the boy's ass, wedging them closer together.

Daisuke gasped, pulling away from the Kaiser's neck. The sudden loss of contact made him shiver, so he darted forward to nibble just a little on his earlobe, eager to taste him again.

"Dai-chan…" Ken called again, hoping this time the boy would answer the way he expected him to.

"Osamu-chan…" Daisuke purred, and Ken smirked evilly. Perfect. Just perfect.

"Say it again." He ordered softly, stopping his hands in a mute blackmail. Daisuke gasped again and licked his way down the Kaiser's neck.

"Osamu-chan…"

"Again…" he smirked as he lowered his mouth to lick gently the softness of Daisuke's amber-colored neck.

"Osamu-chan…"

Now completely aware that the wonderful sensation gifted to him by this almost worshipping boy weren't for him, Ken only smirked, allowing his body to keep rocking almost erotically against the one gifting him with such sensations. Daisuke's lips and tongue were still paying homage to his neck and his hands were not idle either, stroking the satiny of Ken's pale back from under the fabric of his jumpsuit. A soft mewling noise escaped Daisuke's lips and Ken could only smirk, satisfied with the way he could make the other boy whimper on command by just licking or touching certain spots.

Daisuke had been Osamu's once. If that's so, he was meant to be his now. It didn't matter if the cruel tyrant was just playing with his feelings. It didn't matter if he was fooling him. It didn't matter if he was using him. Cause if Osamu had used him, tasted him, then he had all the rights to do the same. And so, so much more.

He had the rights to take him, to use him and then throw him away. To toy with him and his heart. To hurt him and leave him to mourn. Everything that had been Osamu's, *had* to be his. And it didn't matter if Daisuke was a living creature and not an object, it didn't make any difference. He would be his, and he would have all the rights to do whatever he wanted with him.

So, smirking even more cruelly, the Kaiser did the only thing he could do at that moment. Sneaking his hand out from under Daisuke's shirt, he gently grabbed his chin and guided it up to claim his as his own with the most powerful, passionate kiss Daisuke could ever dream of.

//Served you right, Osamu// Ken thought, pleased in the way Daisuke was gently copying everything he was doing, tentatively kissing him back, desperate to show just as passion as he was given. //The one you loved the most, is now mine.//

The third step on the bloodstained staircase which spiraled and penetrated the sky had been made. He had Osamu's intelligence. He had gained the same respect he had gained. He had Osamu's appearance and now, he held the object of his affection in his hands. And the redhead was willing to please him and be used by him.

Ken smirked through the kiss and, wherever he was now, he could hear Osamu cry.

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