I Don't Know You Anymore
A songfic by Tyleet
A/N: Thanx to my sister Khavi, who helped me edit this so that Cloud and Shard weren't gay.... Couldn't have done it without you!! (I have nothing against yaoi.... I love it, it just didn't fit my theme and was purely accidental that it happened in the first place.... anyway, it's gone now) Well, um... Basically this is a Tifa + Cloud thing, but (don't ask me how) I managed to work my other fic "Gunning Down Romance" into the equation. If this starts to not make sense, then.... well, I recommend reading it. It will probably make enough sense without it, though. Anyway, slight language, little bit of violence, sadness and angst , and other than that that's all for my warnings. I'll stop rambling now and let you read the fic, K?
Disclaimer: If I owned FFVII, then Sephiroth would NOT die at the end, Aeris would not be at the bottom of a Mako pool, and the two would be a happy peppy little couple. Seeing how THAT's not happening, I don't claim to own any rights to the thing. Happy now? Also, I don't own Savage Garden or their songs.
**I would like to visit you for awhile
get away, and out of this city
maybe I shouldn't have called but someone had to be the first to break**
Tifa stood just outside of Costa del Sol in indecision. Should she go in? This was where Cloud lived and she longed to see him. She loved him so much. But still... the last time she'd visited him, months ago... No, she wouldn't think about it. She couldn't. Apprehensively, she walked into the beachside city.
Looking around, at first it seemed exactly the same. Children played on the sidewalks, vendors sold souvenirs to tourists, beautiful girls in bathing suites headed for the beach with their handsome surfer boyfriends. It looked so normal Tifa almost thought that nothing had changed after all. Turning in the general direction of Cloud's condo she started forward slowly, enjoying the peace while she could.
At his front door, she could hear heavy metal playing from inside. Her fears confirmed, she sighed and opened the door. Immediately, booming music cranked up to earsplitting levels, the bitter smell of alcohol and the sight of a mass of people with hair dyed radical colors and a general punk attitude dancing in the trashed house assaulted all of her senses. In the middle of it all stood a man with spiky black hair dyed blood red at the ends, dressed all in black with silvery metal chain necklaces. This man, who had his back to her, seemed to be the ringleader. Speechless, she felt the eyes of almost all the men in the room examine her with interest and those of the women glare at her with envy. The man in charge, noticing something different, turned to see what everyone was looking at, a slightly drunken smile on his face. It disappeared when he saw her. Her dark brown eyes met his, which were, as she had known they would be, an intense, glowing blue.
"Cloud..." she whispered as he took a few menacing steps toward her.
Comments like "Go get 'em Blade!" and "Yeah Blade! It's your lucky day, man!" came from the partiers, along with hooting and whistling. Cloud didn't acknowledge them. His eyes, slightly unfocussed because of alcohol, narrowed at her in a glare as he crossed his arms across his chest.
"Tifa, what are you doing here? I told you not to come back!" he hissed, barely audible over all the noise.
"Cloud, I-"
"Hey Blade, is that your old girlfriend or something? She's hot, man!" called a guy with a blue mohawk, cutting Tifa off.
"Something like that. Keep partying Shard. I'll be back in a minute," called Cloud, grabbing Tifa's arm.
"Whatever, man. Don't be too long," came Shard's reply with a wink. A fight broke out between two skimpily clad women and Tifa and Cloud were forgotten.
** We can go sit on the back porch
relax
talk about anything,
it don't matter
I'll be courageous if you can pretend that you've forgiven me **
Blade dragged Tifa outside, angry. What was she thinking, anyway? Hadn't he made it quite clear that he didn't want to see her six months ago, the last time she'd come?
Outside in the hot sun, Blade let go of Tifa and turned to face her. He didn't really know what to say, and he was too surprised at her arrival to think of something, but he knew he didn't want this scene in front of his friends. He settled for glaring down at her.
"Cloud..."
"Blade. My name is Blade. Cloud Strife died with Aeris," he growled.
Tifa's eyes filled with hurt tears which she stubbornly held back.
"You know that's not true!! I miss her too! She was my friend, ok? We all loved her, but it's been seven months now! This isn't what she would have wanted for you, Cloud!"
"It's Blade!" he roared. Then, realizing people walking by were staring, he lowered his voice. "Tifa, we've been through this already. I am not the Cloud Strife you used to know. He's gone. I am Blade now. Don't forget it." He avoided mentioning Aeris again... that memory was still fresh in his mind, like a new wound that hurt to be touched.
"Cloud.... Blade," she started, using both of his names. "Look at you. You changed your name, you dyed your hair, and you must have enough metal around your neck to rebuild half of Coral. But you haven't changed your soul. You can't. Blade. A name. It means nothing whether or not I call you that. You're still you, Cloud!"
"Well, if it doesn't make a difference, I'd prefer to be called Blade," was his cold reply. He was loosing his patience with Tifa.
"Fine. Blade. I didn't come here to discuss names. I came to see you. I- I miss you, Blade. Come back to Midgar with me. It's amazing all the reconstruction that's been done in these months since Meteor. There are no slums anymore. Please Blade, please!"
Her eyes pleaded with his. Their rich dark brown color was full of concern. So different from her eyes... The wise green eyes that he longed for... Aeris's eyes. But she was gone, and without her he would never be the same again. But the expression Tifa held, so like Aeris's. Kind and loving. It took all his willpower not to give in to those eyes. Suddenly, they seemed to turn the fresh spring color he missed so much, pleading with him. But for what? To go with Tifa? No. He wouldn't forget Aeris's memory so easily. He turned his back on the mesmerizing stare before he could change his mind.
"Thanks anyway Tifa, but no. I'm happy here," Blade announced formally. It would be best to get rid of her quick then go inside, get a beer, and try to dull the ache. As he started forward, he felt a hand on his right arm, gently placed. He stiffened against the touch, and against the shivers it sent up his spine.
"Please, it would mean so much to me... Please, Cloud."
Without thinking, Blade whipped around angrily and backhanded Tifa across the face- hard. "Dammit Tifa! It's Blade! I'm not coming with you, so if that's all you have to say, leave!"
One hand to her cheek, she glared up at him with tear filled eyes, the warm look they'd had moments ago turned cold. "Bastard...." she whispered in fury. "You damned BASTARD!" she screamed, unable to contain her pain and shock.
He felt the sting on his cheek before he realized that she had slapped him. Blade stared at her, unable to respond. He hadn't meant to hit her, it had just happened, but it was too late now. Tifa shook her head angrily, backing away. Before he could say anything, she turned and ran, unwilling to let him see the tears that streamed down her face.
Blade realized suddenly that everyone in the street was staring at him, already forming the latest gossip about "that boy" and how the "punk riffraff" had hit a girl. He didn't care. He needed a cold beer, loud music, and his friends who were in his house. At his door he stopped and took one last look behind him for a glimpse of Tifa, but she was already gone. Telling himself that he wasn't disappointed, he stepped inside, looking for solace in a place where, deep in his heart, he knew it wouldn't be.
A/N: Nope, it's not over! That was just chapter one! This is very, very long, be forewarned. I wasn't going to chapter it at first, but if I didn't it would just be long and boring. I have the whole thing typed out and will post the next part soon, but I want some feedback on this part first, ok? Please? Comments and criticisms will be applied to future fics (not this one, seeing as it's already done, but I like advice) Thanx for reading! It means a lot to me!
