17
Darkness. All-encompassing darkness.
"Not exactly what I expected," Angel
mused.
He knew he was dead. He remembered breathing. He remembered feeling his heart beat human blood through human
cells. He remembered looking down on
his body as his soul left the realm of the flesh, watching Buffy cry over the
shell he left behind. Then the darkness
had folded around his ethereal self, leaving him drifting in some strange
limbo.
"Not even a light at the end of a tunnel," he
continued his musings. His voice had no
echo in this place. "You would think
after all this, I would at least get to see the tunnel."
As if in response to his words, twin stars
started winking in the distance. Angel
frowned, concentrating on the dim light as it grew steadily brighter. "Hello?" he called nervously.
The two pinpricks of light flashed in answer to
Angel's call, burning brighter before fading again. The air around Angel's face started to move with the force of the
lights passing through it. Angel could
feel the pull of a powerful presence, but he wasn't afraid. He didn't sense malice or evil from the
beings drifting towards him.
'And yes,' he decided. 'They were indeed thinking, feeling
beings. Maybe not flesh, but definitely
intelligent.'
"Hello?" Angel called again, curious why he was
here and not in whichever afterlife he had earned.
"Well done, Warrior," a disembodied voice
drifted down to Angel. He was squinting
against the light, but within the brilliant aura surrounding them, he could
just make out the silhouette of a man and a woman. "You have averted the Apocalypse and defeated your greatest
enemy."
Angel recognized the voice as female and
answered in the direction of the woman-silhouette, "Where am I? Who are you?"
"We are The Powers That Be," the man-silhouette
answered.
"You have fulfilled your destiny," the
woman-silhouette said, her voice musical in Angel's ears.
"If I fulfilled my destiny, why am I here with
you, and not moving on to whatever afterlife I get to have?" Angel asked. The light emanating from the beings were
burning his eyes and making his head spin.
The woman-silhouette's lilting voice resounded
in his mind. "The choice of your life
or death lies with you."
Angel frowned. Talking to them directly was even more frustrating than decrypting the
visions they sent Cordelia. "I don't
understand," he said. "Didn't I
shanshu? I died a human, didn't I?"
The man-silhouette's voice answered, replacing
the melody of his female counterpart's voice in Angel's mind. "You passed your final test. You accepted your own death over the death of
others the demon Angelus would have caused."
"As reward for your ultimate sacrifice, the
choice is yours to live as a man, or move on to your next life. What do you choose?" the woman-silhouette
asked close to Angel's face.
Angel's mind was reeling from the news. He could return, live as a man, a
human. He could be with Buffy.
The thought of the blonde woman chosen to
battle the forces of darkness whom he loved so much made him pause. He looked up at the twin beings, not
shielding his eyes from their light to better study them. Memories of that one perfect non-day that he
and Buffy shared flowed through him as Angel asked, "What of the Slayer? Would my return as a human man change her
flow of life?"
Silence fell over the towers of light. Their radiance faded in and out in rhythm
with Angel's breath. It was the
woman-silhouette that answered Angel, "She is the Chosen One. As such she is destined to only die young."
"You didn't answer my question. Before, when I was returned to humanity by
the blood of the Mohra demon, the Oracles said that the Slayer would die sooner
than she was destined to, because of me. I need to know if that is still true." Angel's frustration with the cryptic Powers was showing.
"Yes," the man-silhouette answered simply.
"Then I choose death," Angel said, pain
coloring his determined words.
The woman-silhouette slowly floated around
Angel, studying him as he studied her not so long ago. "You would give up life as a human, life
shared with the woman you love, to save her from an earlier death?" she
queried.
This time it was Angel that answered
simply. "Yes."
"You would deny yourself the chance to share
the sun with her?
Angel sighed, the weight of the questions
bearing down on his heart. "Buffy and I
were never meant for the sun. Destiny
tried to tell us that on so many different occasions in so many different ways. I am finally prepared to listen and
accept. I would rather that Buffy mourn
my death and move on to the happiness she deserves than have my presence cause
her any more pain."
The Powers fell silent once again, their outer
light waxing and waning under their silent conversation. They turned to their Warrior once again, the
man-silhouette addressing Angel, "We are the Powers That Be. We see all that was, is and might yet
be.
"As a mortal man, you were a lay-about and a
drunkard with no destiny at all. As the
vampire, Angelus, you were the most devastating force of Darkness ever set free
on the world of Light. As a Warrior of
Good, you were savior to many, including the Chosen One.
"Your destiny was clear, and you succeeded in
fulfilling that destiny. You made
amends for the evil you wrought. And as
such, you are no longer indebted to us. You are free."
The woman-silhouette took up her counterpart's
speech, "As a free being, you have choices. And here are the choices we can offer you.
"You can choose life as a mortal human like you
were born to be. You will no longer be
a Warrior, and will be free to live out your days as you see fit. Or you can choose death. Your soul will be released to find its final
reward in the next life."
"Or you can choose the third option," the
man-silhouette continued. "Choose to be
a Warrior of Good of your own free will. You will be returned to life as a mortal man, but with the strengths of
the vampire life you have known. Which
do you choose?"
Angel stood before the Powers That Be, shocked
to silence. Memories of his life
flashed before his eyes. He remembered
Buffy, how brave and strong she always was. It didn't matter to her how great the evil was; she was always ready to
battle it to the last. He remembered
Doyle who gave his own life so that Angel could continue to fight the good
fight. He remembered kissing Buffy in
the sunlight.
Another memory came to the foreground. Wise words spoken by a scared girl: "I've seen too much. I know what goes bump in the night. Not being able to fight it..."
Buffy's words struck a cord in Angel. Never before had they rung so very true. He knew he could never be just a man without wanting to try and fight the demons feasting on innocence, but he couldn't not be with Buffy. Not again.
"I will be human?" Angel asked, wanting to know the fine print, even though he already made his decision. "But with my old vampire strength and speed?"
"Yes," the man-silhouette confirmed. "You will retain all the strengths, abilities and skills you enjoyed as a vampire, but you will be human."
Angel pressed on, "And Buffy? We can be together without any danger?"
"You will be free to love as a mortal man would love," the woman-silhouette answered, the smile in her voice turning the words into a song.
Angel allowed the words to sink in before speaking.
"Very well. I will be your Warrior," he said, the passion of having a purpose burning through him.
The twin vessels of light surrounded Angel, covering his form with their heat. They reached out and touched him, saying in perfect unison, "So be it."
Fire flashed through Angel's body, the Powers' touch electrifying. He felt himself falling, the limbo parting around him with ever-increasing speed. The hard ground rushed up to meet him. Angel glimpsed his body lying immobile on the floor with Buffy still sobbing with his head held in her lap.
Then his perspective suddenly changed as his eyes flew open to stare up at the crying woman's face. Angel jerked upright, gulping in breath after tearing breath. His heart slammed against his breastbone, racing with the overload of oxygen it had to handle.
Buffy screamed, scurrying away from him with fright.
"Angel?" she asked uncertainly, remembering every other time he had returned to her from some Hell or another.
Angel turned to her, still gasping, but slowly getting his breathing and heartbeat under control. This was going to take some getting used to, he thought amused.
"Buffy," he soothed. "It's okay. I'm here. I'm me."
'Yes', Buffy saw, 'this was her Angel. And he was….'
"Alive…" she finished the thought out loud as she crawled to the man sitting in front of her.
Buffy raised her hand to Angel's chest. It shook with uncertainty, fear… and hope. Angel took her outstretched fingers in his now-warm hand and kissed her palm before gently placing it over his heart.
Buffy looked from her hand to his face and back, tears of joy stinging her eyes. "Your heart…" she said, choking back a sob. "It's beating."
Angel pulled the weeping woman close to him, encircling her in his arms. He felt Buffy tremble at the feel of his breath against her ear.
"Yes," he whispered and kissed her, allowing his longing and love to be transported to where they were joined so closely.
After an eternity of tender exploration, their lips parted. "But how?" Buffy breathed, needing to know if this fantasy was real.
"The Powers," Angel explained in a hushed tone. "They made me an offer I couldn't refuse."
Angel thrilled at Buffy's tingling laugh, swallowing it with his mouth as he kissed her again.
With a little groan, he pulled away from his love. He needed to explain what happened, to find out how Buffy would react. "They said if I returned a normal human man, you would die. Or die sooner, at least."
Buffy frowned. "But you are human, aren't you?" She pulled away from Angel, giving him room to explain.
"The Powers said that if I chose of my own free will, I could keep my vampire strengths, but still be a human man with a soul. No curse."
"Chose what?"
"To be their Warrior."
Angel held his breath, waiting for Buffy's reaction. Would she accept him as a less than normal man?
Buffy rose to her feet, Angel's words repeating over and over in her mind. What would this mean? She had always wanted a normal relationship with a normal guy, but she knew that normal guys tend to die around her. And she knew that she would never be normal as long as she lived.
Could this be the answer, she wondered, wanting to hope for a happily ever after with all that she was. Could she and not-quite-normal Angel really have a future together? A future that has been denied them for so long?
"You mean you're like me now?" Buffy asked
Angel, still not looking at him.
Angel also rose to his feet. "If you mean like you in the sense of being
stronger and faster than your average man, yes. I'm not a Slayer. That's
not possible. I'm not what I was
before. I'm not Liam and I'm not
Angelus either, or vamp Angel for that matter. I'm just Angel, I guess."
"But you're mortal now, right?" Buffy
questioned, finally meeting the uncertain man's eyes.
Angel nodded. "I'm mortal now, just like you." He wanted so badly to touch her, but held back. The next move had to be Buffy's.
Buffy made her move. Slowly, carefully, she stepped up to Angel's tall frame. She reached up, touching his jaw, his cheek
tenderly, memorizing his features with her fingertips. The feel of his warm skin under her hand
washed away all the loneliness that had held her prisoner since Angel left her,
and her decision was made.
She conveyed this decision to Angel by gently pulling
his face down to her and kissing him. She whispered into his mouth, "Are you still my guy?"
Angel's mouth curled up into a happy
smile. He swept his Slayer up into his
powerful arms.
"Always."
Angel carried Buffy out into the waiting
daylight. They both turned their faces
to the welcome heat of the sun's rays, bathing in it.
"So, what now?" Buffy asked, brushing her
smiling lips against Angel's cheek.
Angel smiled and caught Buffy's lips in a quick
passionate kiss. "Now we live happily
ever after," he answered as he lowered her into the passenger side of his black
convertible. He hopped into the
driver's side and gunned the engine. "Are you sure?" Angel asked without saying the words, afraid to believe
that his dreams have finally come true.
Buffy leaned in close to her Angel, snuggling
up to his side. She never wanted to
leave his side ever again. "Forever,"
she purred, as the reunited lovers drove off into their future.
THE END
