Things Harry Potter characters wouldn't be caught saying

Things Harry Potter characters wouldn't be caught saying

The continuation…mwahahaha!

To each other:

Harry to Voldemort: You killed my father!

Voldemort: No Harry…I am your father…

Harry: Noooooo! (Falls down a space pit, just like Luke Skywalker!)

Dobby to Harry: Where are Dobby's monthly Galleons? How is Dobby going to be betting in blackjack today if Dobby doesn't have his Galleons?

Harry: I told you, I don't have them today!

Dobby: Well, then!! Dobby is going to stop pretending to be Harry Potter's fan! And Harry Potter can have his socks back, too!

Harry to Dumbledore: Sir, do you really think Volde – I mean, You-Know-Who, is coming back?

Dumbledore: Oh, sure! Me and Voldie used to be partners in crime back in boot camp!

Ron to Hermione: What do you have for your last inch of parchment?

Hermione: (Looks up from reading "Teen People".) Hmm? Oh, I haven't done it. Go ask Neville.

Ron: Why?

Hermione: (Sighs impatiently.) Well, if you must know, Neville does all my homework for me. He's a genius!

Professor McGonagall to Professor Trelawney: So what do you want to do tonight?

Trelawney: Let's paint our nails! Oh, and I want to try this new hairstyle on you!

McGonagall: Did you foresee that?

Trelawney: Absolutely, girl!! Oh, by the way…(whispers) How are you holding up?

McGonagall: Great! The students don't have any idea that we're friends!

Trelawney: We're holding up both our reputations! (Both jump up and down and scream.)

If they lived in the U.S. (continued):

Harry: Wassssuuuupppp??!!

Dumbledore: (Tune to "I Don't Want To Miss A Thing" by Aerosmith) And I don't wanna miss a tha-ang…How's that, Stevie?

Steve Tyler: We'll call you. And don't call me Stevie.

Lucius Malfoy: Sit down, Draco…I am going to teach about something very important. Something you'll want to remember forever………Draco, my son, it's time you found out about…The Chad.

Dobby: Antie up, boys. (Is that how you spell it?)

Hermione: (Singing.) There's no business like show business!

Draco Malfoy: What would you get a role as? A stunt chipmunk?

Hermione: Jump off a cliff, Malfoy.

Lottery guy: And today's lucky number, for the $1 million dollars, is…number 54!

Ron: 51? Hmm…hey, that's my number! Oh my gosh! I won the Muggle Lottery! I won the Muggle Lottery!!

Mr. Weasley: Not fair, Ron! I wanted to win the Muggle Lottery!

Draco Malfoy: Father, I think it's time I got a facelift. My nose is too long.

Voldemort: I'm going to be a punk rocker! Marilyn Manson, you're my hero!

Dumbledore: (Under his breath.) You'd certainly look like him.