Amiboshi's Flute of Death ~ by Ulari

Amiboshi's Flute of Death ~

This is the story of one seishi who found out that he was more powerful than the gods. Unfortunately, he was born with no malice in his heart, so he didn't use his power. Until one day when he met a girl from another world named Miaka…

One fine day Amiboshi was walking in the woods. He was bored.

"I'm so nice, I think I'll pick some flowers and give them to the next person I see." He thought. Then he picked some flowers.

A little ways on he heard a shrieking noise. He ran to investigate.

"AAAIIIIIEIEEEEEIEIEIEIEIEIAAAA!!!!!" screamed a large mouthed young girl in a high-pitched voice.

The girl rushed forward and rammed into Amiboshi and fell down on her tush. "Oww," she said. Then she looked up at Amiboshi. Amiboshi was utterly repulsed by this hideous figure before him, but he was so nice, that he took pity on her. He held out the flowers he had picked. "Here," he said.

"OOOOOO!" the girl shrieked again. "Pretty!" She began to shove them in her mouth.

"What are you doing! Are you stupid? You can't eat flowers." Amiboshi screamed. The girl looked up and seemed very sad.

"They are pretty though, thank you." The girl whined.

"You're welcome," Amiboshi turned and began to walk away. Suddenly, he was tackled from behind and knocked to the ground.

The girl had jumped on him! What was she doing?

"What are you doing?" Amiboshi asked her.

"Huhhuhuhhhhhh," she breathed crazily.

"Ahh!" Amiboshi tried to wriggle out of her grasp, but her madness made her strong.

"You mussa love me! You gave me pretty present!" The girl raved stupidly. Suddenly she regained her composure. "I'm Miaka Yuuki." Then she was rabid looking again. "And you mussa love MEEEE!!!"

"NOOOOOOO!" cried Amiboshi. He pulled out his flute and played a tune. Immediately, Miaka began to dance a scary dance.

"This is nice," she said. She looked like a monkey. Amiboshi tried not to laugh and kept playing. Miaka kept dancing. And dancin' and dancin' and dancin'. Finally, she died.

"Yay! I am a-rid of that a-cursed hideous creature!" Amiboshi cried.

Then he walked along in the forest again.

Amiboshi was no nice guy anymore. He was not going to take any crap. So when Tamahome came "ta da-ing" along and looking like a Chinese acrobat, Amiboshi blasted him with a note from his flute.

"Yeah!" he cried. "That was great!"

"Hi no da," Chichiri said then. "How come you just killed them no da?"

"You asked too many questions," Amiboshi growled. Chichiri died too.

Everyone Amiboshi met annoyed him. He just killed them all.

"Hehehehehahahaha!" he yelled. He sounded like Tomo.

"Whoa," he said. "Maybe I shouldn't laugh anymore."

Soon, Amiboshi came to the Seiryuu camp. His twin came out and confronted him.

"I won't let you kill Yui-sama! I know that you're my brother, but I can't let you!!!" Suboshi screamed.

Yui ran out then. "No! NO! Kill me! Please! Don't let Suboshi touch me!!!!"

Amiboshi listened to Yui. Then he killed his brother too. Tomo came out.

"Hehehehehahahaha!" he laughed horribly.

"Oh yeah!" Amiboshi cried. Then he laughed.

"Hehehehehahahaha!" Tomo blanched. He ran into a tree and died.

Miboshi was next. The weird looking baby-thing frightened most people, but Amiboshi merely killed him with a single deadly note and that was that.

Soi died, Ashitare died, and then out came… Nakago.

"So, Nakie-poo, it's come down to this." Nakie-poo nodded. He prepared for a chi blast, but Amiboshi lifted his flute and prepared to play a death song. "Wait!" Nakago cried. Amiboshi paused, much to his dislike. "Will you spare me if I give you something?"

Amiboshi debated. "Whadda'll give me?" he asked skeptically.

Nakago looked around and then said in a low voice, "I'll tell you about my forbidden past."

"Tempting, but, NO!" Amiboshi blew his flute and then Nakie-poo died.

Amiboshi went on to be the ruler of Shi Jin Ten Chi Sho and he killed whoever annoyed him. He was never kind again and he liked it. In fact, he began to resemble Nakago…

The End

Author's Note:

I know, I know. It's very very stupid. But I think it's funny. If you don't, I'm sorry. I was being a little, um, insane at the time I wrote this. Oh well. I thought that Amiboshi was the least likely to go on a killing rampage other than Chichiri and Chiriko. And maybe Miaka. Maybe. She would probably just accidentally kill everyone without meaning to.