This is my first fic, I hope you like it. It may be too realistic, so, I want you to tell me what you think, just not in e-mail. No Flames please! Thanks.
Disclaimer: I do not own "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?" (or Regis) or Star Trek, or "Wheel Of Fortune" or the Secret Service or ABC, or NBC, or UPN, or Paromount, or Home Shopping. At times, I find this to be a very good thing.
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Janeway and her officers are guests on "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?" Things are going well, until, well, you can figure that out.
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Regis: Welcome to this special, er...special edition of "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?" We have with us, the Voyager Officers, and they are: Captain Janeway, Chakotay, Tuvok, Harry Kim, B'Elanna Torres-Paris, and Tom Paris. Seven of Nine could not make this due to, an, identity crisis. Okay...
When each name is called, person gives sheepish grin and small wave. Rehearsed.
Tom: I'm goin' for the big one! Big money! Big money!
B'Elanna: whisper Tom, wrong game.
Regis: Clears throat. And now, our first Fastest Finger question! It is: Who just mistook this show for "The Big Wheel?"
Music: Dun Du Da!
Regis: A. Me B. Tom C. The Borg D. - Well, there is no D, so, A, B, C, or, okay. The correct answer was D. Wait, this just came in. Places hand on ear like Secret Service Guy. The correct answer was B! So, who got it wrong? B'Elanna, Tuvok, and the Captain, in the fastest time: Tuvok! Come Tuvok! To audience: We'll be back after this!
About 23 loooooong commercials later...
Tuvok: B, no, A. Well...
Regis: Sorry, we started without you. Tuvok is thinking hard about this question: What is Captains Janeway's last name? A. Kathryn B. Tuvok C. None D. Janeway.
Tuvok: Tuvok is my name, so you are trying to confuse me. Kathryn is her first name. It might be None. And Janeway is her last name. So, I think it's...C, None.
Regis: I'm sorry. The correct answer is B, Tuvok. Bye Commander. whispers Get off my stage you pointy eared maniac!
Tuvok runs off the stage.
Chakotay: Has phaser pointed at Regis. Whining: I wanna be next!!
Regis: Okay!
Phaser fires.
Regis: That wasn't so bad. Looks at hole in his hand. Can we get a medic down here?
Medic sews hand shut.
Regis: Okay...
'Time is up' alarm sounds.
Regis: Well, that was the 'time is up' alarm. Time is up, see you tomorrow when we continue the game with this...most interesting crew! Be sure to stay tuned to ABC for "Wheel of Fortune" next!
Tom: Big money! Big money!
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PatFrom Wheel of Fortune: Welcome. We have a new contestant, Mr...what was that again? Oh yes. Mr. Tom Paris!
Crowd Applauds
Tom: Big money! Big money!
Pat: Give that wheel a spin, Tom!
Tom: Big money! Big money!
Harry: Ok. We get it.
Tom: Big money! Big money!
Seven: Enough! I will end this...this...this weird thing.
Janeway: You go Borg-Girl!
Seven begins the disco
Harry: Yeah!
He starts the disco
EMH: Ah. 20th century Earth dance, the disco.
He, attempts the disco
Tom: Big Money! Big money!
B;Elanna: I am about 5 nanoseconds from taking my fist and inpailing it into your stomech!
Tom: Big money! Big money!
B'Elanna takes her fist and jabs it at Tom's stomech.
Tom: Ouch! Hey! What was that for?
B'Elanna does not hear for she has already started the disco.
Pat: Vanna? Activate the 'Ultimate Discotopia!'
Vanna touches the square on the 'Puzzle' board in the upper left-hand corner. You know, the one that they never use. A giant disco ball swings down from the ceiling.
Harry: Discotopia! I saw this on Home Shopping! Truly amazing!
Disco music starts playing.
"Unknown Voice": I am SFAdmiral00 high singing voices: Zero Zeroooo! Thank you. I have come to...
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I do understand that my frequent use of the word/related words to "disco" is becoming quite redundant. Yet, I feel that this is necessary for me to achieve the much needed feeling of overwhelmingness, annoyance, and total bewilderment for my reader. Thank you.
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Back To...
Tom: Just disco!!
SFAdmiral00: No, I have come to...
B'Elanna: Play "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?"
SFAdmiral00: No, I have come to...
Tom: Win Big money! Big money!
SFAdmiral00: No, I have come to...
Harry: Watch Home Shopping?
SFAdmiral00: No, I have come to...
Time is up alarm sounds. Music and lights stop.
Pat: Well, were out of time. Join us next time. And stay tuned for...
SFAdmiral00: As sound fades. DOES ANYONE CARE WHAT I HAVE COME TO DO????
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Thank you, I hope you enjoyed my first fic. Thanks for reading it. Oh, and a famous quote: "The best time to write a fanfic is between 11pm, and 5am, Good Night,"
