Title:
Dark Angel
Name:
Joy
Email:
SleepingBeauty2@ziplip.com
Rating: PG-13
OK. I have successfully not
thought about what sort of response I'm hoping for from Logan for the last ten
minutes. I guess that's a good thing. Normal looks like he's going to chew my
ass for something.
"Max" he screams.
"What?! I have all my
signatures, you can check!"
"Package."
"Fine…" Wait.
"Normal, this has my name on it."
"Yeah. Got dropped off five
minutes ago," he responds.
"By Logan… guy in the
wheelchair?"
"No… Tall, bald, black
guy," he says. "Now, I need your signature and thank you for using
Jam Pony," he says with a slight smirk.
What the hell is this? And why did
Bling bring it down? Only one way to find out. I walk over to my locker and sit
down on the bench before opening it, so I can put whatever it is away quickly…
There's a note on the front.
Max,
I wrote this the night you came crashing into my world.
Logan
Oh my god. Lips I long for… die at
the touch of… My dark angel… I can't handle this right now. Original Cindy
is heading this way. Crap. I shove the framed poem into my locker and lock it
up. "See ya Cindy," I say to avoid whatever conversation was about to
be had.
"Lunch?" she calls.
"Page me!" I yell as I
pick up a few packages and head out. I may need to talk later. Right now, I
just need to bike. I need to have
several happy non-thoughts, otherwise I'm going to go crazy.
What the hell was he thinking? Why
would he send that to me now? OK, my stomach is freaking out. I told you before-
enough with the butterflies and summersaults. I'm not a normal girl. I don't
need my body acting girlie on me! Get your head in the game, solider… What the
hell am I thinking? That won't help. That will only remind me why Logan has
gotten this far into my heart… Did I just think that?
Oh, god… My pager just went off.
Please, don't let it be Logan. I'm not ready to face him yet… It's Cindy…
Aiight. Maybe I need a girl talk after all. She may swing the other way, but
she does seem to have a handle on the guy thing. I just don't want to hear the
'I told you so' talk right now. Suck it up. I need to vent a little at least.
She was always great about Darren…
"Hey, it's me hitting you
back," I say into the receiver.
"Meet me at the coffee shop on
third?" Cindy says.
"K, just going to turn in my
sign sheet first…" I say really wanting to get the poem to show her.
"Don't worry sug'r. I already
let myself into your locker to see what upset ya. We be talkin' at lunch,
K?"
"K. See ya soon," I say.
Normally, I'd be mad…not this go round.
Cindy is already sipping on some
coffee when I arrive. I must look bummed. "Aiight… tell me what's
up."
"Ya know what's up… Ya read
it…" I respond.
"Nah. There was a tall black
man that we both know, sneaking a peek at your reaction, that says it goes
further then that… so spill," Cindy sips her coffee.
"Bling was watching… Man, he's
gonna tell Logan I hated it," I say biting my lip.
"Nah… The man was heading to
another patient's home. Not planning on telling roller boy anything… That, my
dear, is your job… So once again, what's up?"
I stare absently at the wall,
playing with the mortar. How do I explain the last couple days? Logan and I
can't tell each other how we feel so we've resorted to poetry… I'm a total moron
and I can't deal with reality, so we've settled for paper… I have a habit of
running screaming away from anything like commitment, so I'm pretending that
nothing's going on.
"Hon' staring at that wall
won't help," I hear Original Cindy say over my shoulder.
"I don't know what to
say."
"Start with the poems,"
she prompted.
"How did ya know that there
were poems?"
"Bling."
"Well, what'd he say?"
"Ya not gonna talk willing,
huh? Aiight, brother man said ya been writin' each other poetry… Like ya actually
wrote him some…"
"Yeah…" I say
pathetically. Cindy is giving me her 'hurry up and talk or I'm gonna slap your
ass' look. "I caught Logan writing in this journal the other day… poetry.
He wouldn't let me see but it fascinated me. The next day or so he said he
worried about me and stuff, so I asked if that meant I showed up in his poems
occasionally. He said yeah and I let it drop. Last night he showed me one he
wrote about me… and I took it."
"Ya took it… What'd he think of
that?"
"Well, I went back to check out
the rest of the journal and he had left me another poem. I guess he realized
right away I had snagged it. I figured that turn about was fair play so I wrote
him one back. I tried not to think about the consequences until today when I
saw what he made me… I freaked and delivered packages until I got here."
"Why'd ya freak?" Cindy
asks. "Why's it scary?"
"I wouldn't say scary just… I
don't know where this is going…"
"I do… You and roller boy are
coming to the end of your dance."
"What does that mean?"
"Ya getting' down to how ya
really feel about each other… Ya gonna stop with the 'We ain't like that' crap
and 'Just friends' stuff will go away."
"But I don't want that… I want
Logan as friend," I plead.
"Boo, ya not gonna lose the
man… ya just gonna have him differently." My face must be all worried
'cause Cindy looks like she is gonna coddle me or somethin'. "Up till now
ya were cool with the poems. What happened?"
"I don't know…" I don't
know. What did happen? When'd I freak? This morning I guess. "The first
was simple and vague. Like it was about me but it could have not been… The
second one was about how he sees me. It had some romantic overtures but it was
still… gentle. I guess… I guess the third one got to me 'cause…" I can't
even finish the thought.
"Desire… The third one
expressed desire for you… by Logan," Cindy says simply.
"Yeah… I'm not sure how I feel
about that," I say pouting.
"Would ya let the man kiss ya
if he tried?"
Damn… Why'd she have to ask that? I
can feel my cheeks burning… My stomach is flipping out again. My heart is
racing….
"I got my answer… Ya blushed,
ya started breathing heavier, and ya couldn't look at me… I think ya like it
just fine. So question is, what ya gonna do now that ya know he feels that way
toward ya."
"He wrote that poem months
ago…"
Cindy is looking at me like I have a
third eye, "BUT he gave it to ya now… meaning feelings still hold."
K, now I can't breathe. I'm going
into convulsions at the thought. My mind is wandering. If he touched me… If he
kissed me… Agh… I can't do this… I begin to shake my head. "What's the
point of even thinking about it when I may have to jet tomorrow?"
"Boo, ya will always come back…
The vibe he be throwing ya is strong… strong enough to last over time and distance…
till ya be able to be together… Besides the man would run with ya," she
says with confidence.
"Nah he wouldn't… When I jetted
last time, I asked him to come. He said no," I say despondently.
"The chair will make him feel
that way… but boo, I'm serious bout the time and space thing… I may not always
give Logan props cause he's a man but … he's into ya hardcore. He'd do anything
to keep ya safe."
I pout again. What do I want?
"Balls in your court boo. How
ya gonna play it?" she asks.
"Can't we just pretend that
nothin' happened?"
"Not anymore!"
Sigh… Step forward… Sigh… Breathe… I
can do this. He sent me a gift; I'll
send him one. "If I make him somethin' would ya deliver it for me in true
Jam Pony style?"
"Got it boo. What ya gonna
do?"
"I got a bottle of wine at home
that I was gonna give him… I think I'll wrap it in a poem…"
"Sounds good to Cindy!"
