TITLE: Savage Garden Chapter One: I Knew I Loved You
AUTHOR: Gaia Less
RATING: PG13
SPOILERS: Pilot, Emily... a few flashbacks from actual scenes. Everything else through the beginning of season seven, I guess.
SUMMARY: I knew I loved you before I met you.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Mulder, Scully, or anyone else you might recognize from the series. They are owned by Chris Carter, 1013, and Fox. I don't own them. No copyright infringement is intended. I didn;t create em, I'm just playing with them. I'll give them back when I'm done. Promise!! Please don't sue me...
All songs belong to Savage Garden.. yeah.. they rock. Also just borrowing them, blah blah blah....
Archive anywhere, but please get my permission first :) tis as easy as emailing me and saying, Yo, Gaia, I wanna put your fanfic, [title here], on my site, okay? You can even simply cut and paste that sentence into an email document! I will reply with something along the lines of Hey, that's cool. Promote me! Yeah! Sweeeeet. See? Tis VERY easy :) Wowwww. Hehe
notes and such at the end
Chapter One
I Knew I Loved You
by GL
==========
a voice asks.
I say, turning around from my seat on the couch.
I didn't know anyone else was up, she says, coming around to the other side of the couch. She sits down.
I couldn't sleep, I admit.
Why not? You worried about Quantico, or who gets the most presents this year? she says, smiling.
I sigh. I guess I'm afraid of making a big mistake. I could tell Dad sure thinks I am.
Yeah, well. It's not his life, Dana, Melissa tells me.
I know that. You know, when I first started med school, it felt so right. It seemed like that was where I was supposed to be. And then by the time I graduated, I just knew it was wrong. But now the FBI feels right. And... what if that's wrong too? I wonder out loud.
There is no right or wrong. Life is just a path. You follow your heart and it will take you where you're supposed to go, Melissa says seriously.
God! You sound like a greeting card! I say with a small smile. I don't believe in fate. I think we have to choose our own path.
Well, just don't mistake the path for what is really important in life, she says, still serious.
Which is what?
The people you're going to meet along the way. You don't know who you're going to meet when you join the FBI. You don't know how your life is going to change or how you're going to change the life of others.
I sigh again. If you say so. I just hope I'm not making a mistake in joining the FBI.
You aren't. You're doing what your heart tells you to do. If it seems right, then go for it. If it turns out later that something else seems right, well, listen to your heart. You'll know where to go from there. Melissa smiles and stands back up. I'm going back to bed. Try to get some sleep, okay, Dana?
Okay. Good night, Missy.
Good night. Merry Christmas.
I lean back on the couch. I wonder what she means about how who I meet can change my life. I close my eyes, and fall asleep.
And I dream.
It's the same dream I have been having for weeks. A man--I don't know his name--is there with me. We're always together. I don't know who this man is, but in the dream, I'm in love with him. He's my best friend, and--
I can't hold onto it. Voices cut into my dream and wake me. Merry Christmas!
It's Christmas morning. Everyone's awake and ready to open their presents. I quickly forget the dream and bring myself back to today.
~*~
I dreamed of the man many more times in the next few months. I tried to figure out who the man was, and what he meant to me. But I couldn't come up with anything.
I went to Quantico a few months later. I did really well, and soon I was Special Agent Dana Scully, not just Dr. Scully. I worked at the Academy for a while.
I dreamed of the man a few more times. I thought maybe he was a student at the Academy, but I couldn't think of anyone like that. So I kept it in the back of my brain, only thinking about it occasionally.
The last time I dreamed of the man was the day before I met with Section Chief Blevins, when he told me that I was going to be assigned to the X-Files.
Agent Scully, thank you for coming on such short notice. Please... Blevins motions for me to sit. We see you've been with us just over two years.
Yes, sir, I answer.
You went to medical school but you chose not to practice. How'd you come to work for the FBI? he asks.
Well, sir, I was recruited out of medical school. Um, my parents still think it was an act of rebellion, but, uh... I saw the FBI as a place where I could distinguish myself.
Are you familiar with an agent named Fox Mulder? another man asks.
Yes, I am, I answer.
Blevins and the other man glance at each other. How so? the other man asks.
By reputation. He's an Oxford educated Psychologist, who wrote a monograph on serial killers and the occult, that helped to catch Monty Props in 1988. Generally thought of as the best analyst in the violent crimes section. He had a nickname at the academy... Spooky Mulder. I smile at the man who is sitting in the corner, smoking a cigarette. He doesn't smile back. I suddenly feel uncomfortable.
What I'll also tell you is that Agent Mulder has developed a consuming devotion to an unassigned project outside the bureau mainstream. Are you familiar with the so-called Blevins asks.
I think for a moment. I believe they have to do with unexplained phenomena.
More or less. The reason you're here, Agent Scully, is we want you to assist Mulder on these X-Files. You will write field reports on your activites, along with your observations on the validity of the work, Blevins says.
Am I to understand that you want me to debunk the X-Files project, sir? I ask.
Agent Scully, we trust you'll make the proper scientific analysis. You'll want to contact Agent Mulder shortly. We look forward to seeing your reports, Blevins tells me.
I stand up and exit the office. It sounds like an easy enough assignment. If this man, Fox Mulder's work was really invalid, then I shouldn't have much trouble debunking it.
I make my way down to his office. Why was it in the basement? Was the FBI really too embarassed of him to give him a real office?
I knock on the door. Sorry, nobody down here but the FBI's most unwanted! he calls out from inside. His voice... it sounds vaguely familiar, but I don't know why.
I go into the office and introduce myself. Agent Mulder even *looks* vaguely familiar. I wonder if I've actually ever met him. *No, you'd remember it if you met him,* I think. Yes, he is definitely someone I wouldn't forget...
*Well then why does he look so damn familiar?*
~*~
Six Years Later
Mulder and I have been working together for seven years. I never did prove the validity, or invalidity, of the X-Files. I have remained working with him. He is my best friend... and I'm falling in love with him.
I don't know how or when it happened... but one day I just realized that I loved him. I didn't know if it was as my best friend or as something more... I just knew it was there.
So much has happened in the past seven years. I'd been abducted, Missy had died, I developed cancer, my cancer had gone into remission, and I'd found a daughter that I never knew I had... and she had died. Mulder has never left my side through any of it. That's why I love him. Because he's always there for me.
I lie awake on the couch in my living room. It's late, after midnight, I'm sure. But I just can't sleep.
Suddenly, Missy's words flood into my mind. The people you're going to meet along the way. You don't know who you're going to meet when you join the FBI. You don't know how your life is going to change or how you're going to change the life of others.
And suddenly, I understand. Everything that had happened... wouldn't have happened without Mulder. Or any of the other people I met along the way. I hadn't known that my life would change so much just by meeting him. I can't blame him for anything that happened, but I know now that if I had just debunked his work like I was supposed to, nothing like this would have ever happened.
I fall asleep eventually, and a dream I hadn't had in seven years came back to me.
The man from those dreams was there. I could see his smiling face. I haven't seen you in so long! I say.
Yes, you have, the man answers. I look up into his face, confused, and suddenly realize who he is.
It's Fox Mulder.
I can't even believe it. The man in the dreams was now the man that I love... and I never even knew it. I love him... I've always loved him. Even before I knew him. And he has no idea.
I have to tell him. About the dreams, about how I feel, about everything. And I have to tell him now.
I get into my car and start driving. I turn on the radio. The song I Knew I Loved You' by Savage Garden is playing.
I knew I loved you before I met you
I think I dreamed you into life
I knew I loved you before I met you
I have been waiting all my life...
This song seems so perfect, and so right to be on the radio right now. In fact, it's the perfect way to tell him how I feel.
I stop at a music store and look for Savage Garden. I buy the cd with I Knew I Loved You on it. Then I pay for them and go over to Mulder's apartment.
Hi, Scully, Mulder says when he answers the door. What's up?
Mulder, I need to talk to you.
he says. He steps aside so I can come inside.
Do you have a cd player? I ask him.
Yeah, of course. He clears off some stuff off of a table and I put the cd in. Just listen to this for a moment, okay? I tell him.
he says. I can tell he's confused at what I'm getting at.
Maybe it's intuition
But some things you just don't question
Like in your eyes
I see my future in an instant
And there it goes
I think I've found my best friend
I know that it might sound more than a little crazy
But I believe
I knew I loved you before I met you
I think I dreamed you into life
I knew I loved you before I met you
I have been waiting all my life
There's just just no rhyme or reason
Only this sense of completion
And in your eyes
I see the missing pieces
I'm searching for
I think I've found my best friend
I know that it might sound more than a little crazy
But I believe
I knew I loved you before I met you
I think I dreamed you into life
I knew I loved you before I met you
I have been waiting all my life
He gets a strange look on his face. Scully, why are you playing this, he says softly. It's not quite a question. He looks kind of nervous as he realizes what I'm getting at.
A thousand angels dance around you
I am complete now that I've found you
I knew I loved you before I met you
I think I dreamed you into life
I knew I loved you before I met you
I have been waiting all my life...
I don't know how or when it happened, but Mulder's arms were wrapped around my by the end of the song. He still holds me, even when the song is over. I whisper. I have to tell you something.
He takes my hand and leads me over to the couch. Mulder, I used to have these... dreams. There was a man, and I was in love with him, but I didn't know who he was. I had those dreams before I joined you on the X-Files. Then I met you. You became my best friend, Mulder. I loved you, but... as a friend. And I haven't had that dream since then. Until last night. I dreamed it again last night, and I finally saw the man's face. It was you, Mulder. I knew I loved you... *before* I met you, I said, quoting the song.
Scully... I... I love you too. I love you so much... I never knew...
I smile at him and put my hand on his mouth. I love you, Mulder. So much. Then I lean over and kiss him. Gently at first, but then with more passion. I've loved him for so long, I've been waiting for so long to make this real.
I take a deep breath and smile. I put my head on his shoulder. He holds me tightly. I love you, Scully, he whispers into my hair.
I love you too, I say. I always have.
~*~
