Chap.7
~***~
The Grand Ball is tomorrow! I'm so excited...I'm gonna get to see all those kings and queens dancing and..perhaps Millerna will even let me meet them! Millerna has been sort of stony around me lately....well, it could be because she's preoccupied with all the guests and all...but I swear she gave me a dirty look when I passed her this morning on my way to the gardens...
Yes..the gardens, I spend most of my time there now. Every since that very embarrassing incident with the bush and my overly big mouth, Allen has been sort of avoiding me, I think anyway. We never go riding anymore, and I barely ever see him sigh Lessons in knowing when and when not to keep your mouth shut eh?
I spend most of my days just thinking....a lot of quiet time is spent just playing with the swans and stuff. I'm pretty sure I've never spent as much thinking and wondering about totally useless topics... I've also been teaching Chid how to swim! Yes, I know, what if he drowns...then I'm sure I'd be beheaded laughs nervously oh well...I'm a good swimmer and all..and anyways, we swim in water that like comes up to my waist, which is just deep enough for Chid. He's a really sweet kid...and I've sort of seen past his whole "kingly presence" thing, he's just any normal little boy that just wants to have fun really....
~***~
Yukari laughed, as Chid splashed around in the clear pond water. He was trying to catch the little water skimmers that appeared in the waters around the late-afternoons. He succeeded only in being drenched again and again as he pounced on another wary skimmer. Yukari was seated on the soft bank, watching him, ready to jump in if need be. The air was getting cool, and Yukari couldn't help but shiver involuntarily. Chid was grinning widely, and he blinked up at Yukari.
"C'mon! These little critters are fast!" He jumped yet again, and yet another skimmer dodged his reach. Yukari smiled. The little boy-king was absolutely glowing with excitement and joy. It made her feel good, to see him so happy. She felt that she just had to get him to be happy, it was almost something she had to do.
As the sky darkened, a cool wind started up.
"Chid, I think its best we go in now, its getting cool."
Chid looked up at her,
"I'm not cold."
"But I am." Yukari smiled, and Chid nodded right away. The little boy had the honor of any full-grown knight.
"Let's go in then." Chid grinned, and skipped over to Yukari, splashing a great deal of water in the process. Dressed only in pants that acted as makeshift swimming trunks, Yukari pulled off her own cloak and wrapped it around the little boy. Chid was starting to shiver, and his lower lip was slightly blue. He looked grateful. His small hand reached out, and grasped Yukari's own. Yukari smiled, and they walked hand in hand towards the palace again.
****************************
Allen watched from a parapet window, as the two made their way back towards the castle. He had been watching them for a while. Watched as Chid had splashed around, happier than Allen had ever seen him in his young life. Was it just the day? Or...perhaps was it the girl? Allen turned and stopped short. Van was standing there, his arms crossed, a highly-amused expression on his face. Allen looked at him, then narrowed his eyes, and opened his mouth to say something, but Van beat him to it.
"You disappear, most everyday, just when the sun starts to set. So this is where you go." Van said. Was it only his imagination, or did Van's voice contain suppressed laughter? Allen looked annoyed, unsure of how else to react, so caught off guard he was.
"The sun is magnificent from this view." He finally replied, racking his brain for some sort of better answer. Van laughed, and looked out the window.
"Or perhaps Yukari is magnificent from this view." One eye quirked at Allen. Allen looked away, trying not to turn three shades of red. His last embarrassing moment had not been pleasant, and he had decided that he didn't like it.
"I hadn't noticed." Allen said through pressed lips. Van's expression was jovial. Happy for the first time in what seems like months and its at my expense, Allen thought wryly.
"Hmmm...what is it about her? Even I feel something, its odd. She's so...familiar, it scares me." Van said. Allen looked at his friend in surprise. It was rare that Van Fanel would be so open about how he felt. Usually, Allen had to pry the feelings out of his friend. Van's expression was somber now, and tinted with sadness, but he didn't' look pained, and for that, Allen was grateful.
"Yes, she is familiar somehow." Allen agreed. Van looked at Allen, and he looked as if something was on his mind and had been bothering him for sometime.
"Allen, I mean no disrespect, but.....who exactly is she? I've..never seen her at the court of Asturia before, much less as one of Millerna's ladies. Where is she from?"
Allen froze. His honour told him not to lie, to tell his friend the truth. But, Van didn't deserve any more pain. He had to put up with so much already. Allen didn't want to be the one that reopened a newly closed wound.
"She's...uh..from Fried. She, umm, its somewhat complicated but, Millerna had pity on her." Allen closed his eyes. How stupid was that. It was the first kingdom that had popped into his mind. Van narrowed his eyes, he could sense that something about the whole story didnt' ring true, but he couldn't quite pinpoint it.
"Right." Van looked at Allen, trying to read the expression on the knight's face. Allen seemed to be hiding something, something or other. "From Fried." He said, and Allen nodded. Was it only his imagination? Or had Allen gone a few shades pale? Van shrugged, and turned away. How could he doubt a knight, much less Allen Schezar? Allen was the epitome of the perfect knight, and everyone knew, knights didn't lie. "Well, she's indoor now, you'd have a better view away from that window." The cheeky glint returned to Van's eye. Allen smiled.
"Yes, I would, wouldn't I?"
Van nodded, "Shall we go down and join the rest of the world?"
"We shall." Allen smiled and followed Van out room.
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~***~
Oh my gosh!!! These dresses are tiny!! Absolutely tiny! These corset things are soo tight, I can't breath! gasps Eries is the one that is in charge of making me look nice....she says its a tough job, I just laughed at her, although inside, I am troubled. Am I really so ugly?...Millerna has been locked away the entire day, from the beginning of dawn to late afternoon, no doubt slaving away at making herself beautiful....but it would pay off later I bet I've seen Millerna's gown, its sooo beautiful. Its pale silver, encrusted with diamonds, of course, she's probably going to be the center of all attention sigh
enviously...Hmm...I've been given this lilac gown, its sort of plain. Its one of Millerna's, and, even though it may not be the most stylish thing in the the palace....or in this world...or in this universe...hell, the dress is a piece of crap! Its so not fair! ...well, I understand that I'm not a princess, or something interesting or important like that..but, I shouldn't be made to wear a piece of crap!!!!! God I'm so mad! But the worst thing is..that I can't even say anything, or else it'd seem...well, ungrateful!..I mean, Millerna has already done so much for me.....god, I don't know what to feel..I'm not gonna even think about Allen, cuz that would just screw me over...
~***~
Yukari stood, in front of the large mirror, staring unhappily at her reflection. The dress was so ugly. It had frills around the shoulders, and it was plain and an ugly, dull, gay purple. It was too big in the front, and sagged, and too short around the legs, making her look both fat and gawky at the same time. But worst of all, she had nothing else to wear. This was her last resort, and god, was it an awful one. Her hair, at least, chose to co-operate today. It was shining, and silken. It hung perfectly down her shoulders, it had grown to be quite long. Flopping discontentedly onto the bed, Yukari shut her eyes, imagining another dress, perhaps something that had more...style perhaps? Yukari had half a mind to not even attend the damn ball.
She wasn't how long she lay there, just staring at the ornately designed ceiling of her private chambers. She was surprised to hear a slight knock at the door, and someone spoke.
"Yukari?"
Yukari sat up, pushing her dress so that it covered her knees. Looking outside, she noticed that it was already dark, the sun only a faint shadow on the horizon. Had she fallen asleep? Glancing at herslef in the mirror, she was horrified to find that she looked tired, and messy.
"Uhmm....uhh, one second." She called, using her fingers to brush out her hair, and trying to clear her bleary eyes. Finally, she opened the door hesitatingly. "Sorry...I.." She trailed off, seeing that it wasn't Millerna. It was the Fanelian king, Van. He looked at her, a bemused expression on his face. "Uh...hello...your majesty." She said, caught off guard.
"Hello Yukari. Well, you certainly look nice this evening." He commented. Yukari rolled her eyes, then blushed at how rude that action must've looked.
"Umm, no, not really. This ugly old thing," She laughed nervously. Van quirked a smile, and Yukari looked at him oddly. A smile suited him.
"May I enter?" He asked. Yukari blushed fiercely and stepped backwards.
"Oh yes, of course! Yes, come in." She reprimanded herself for not thinking of that sooner. He stepped in. She noticed that he was dressed in a long cape, with a tunic of bright buckles, and high-topped boots. He looked every inch the royal King he was. Yukari flushed with shame at the tattered shape her own gown was in, and a surge of anger at Millerna flowed through her. Van was studying her intently, and Yukari looked around, uncomfortable. There was something about Van, something strange, a strange vibe that came from her.
"You are from Freid?" He asked suddenly, unexpectedly. Yukari looked at him, confused, then understood. Of course, that was what Allen would've told him. She nodded quickly.
"Yes."
Van fell silent, and studied her some more.
"You are not, are you?" He finally said, his amber eyes piercing her, making her feel so transparent to him, that he could read everything she felt and thought.
"Urm...uhh, yeah..I am." She lifted her chin stubbornly, returning his gaze.
"Hmmm..." Was all he said. He suddenly turned and exited the room. Yukari stared after him, shocked. Was he angry now? Upset? But the door opened again, and he entered again, this time carrying a large parcel. He set it down gingerly on the bed.
"Here, this is for you." He said shortly, and stepped back, regarding her. Yukari looked at him uncertainly. He nodded, "Go on, open it." He smiled lopsidedly, "Something like....Christmas?"
Yukari looked at him, confused. This king had many cards up his sleeve.
"Yes...like Christmas." Her face broke into a smile, how ludicrous. How did Van, King of Fanelia in a world called Gaea, where the earth hung in the sky like the moon, how did he know about a holiday like Christmas, when many countries on Earth didn't know about it! Yukari shrugged, and opened the package gingerly.
A quick intake of breath, and Yukari gasped. She stepped back, after peeling away all the folds of paper and ribbon. Her hand rose to her mouth in surprise and amazement, but mostly in wonderment.
"Oh my god...I.." She stopped short.
On the bed, lying amidst a pile of what looked like folds of cloth and ribbon, was a shimmering gown. It was no ordinary gown, no it seemed in shine, even in the dimly lit room. It was every colour, as it was composed of beads that seemed to glisten, even as the dress lay there on the bed, unmoving. It was long, and, unlike the other gowns of the time, it had a modern style that came from Yukari's own world. It was sleek, and narrow through the hips and legs. It looked like something off a Milan runway, something that only models would ever touch and wear. Something one was afraid to breath on.
"Oh, your majesty, I couldn't." She backed away from the gown, almost as if its glow would be too much to bear. Van laughed then.
"Please, call me Van. And, yes you can. Wasn't it you yourself that said that what you wore was, an...'ugly old thing?'," Van laughed, and smiled. "Well, now you don't have to hide up here."
Yukari was turning three shades of purple, so embarrassed, yet overjoyed.
"How....who's..." A million questions coursed through her mind. Van didn't have a queen did he? Whose dress was it? Had Van gotten a tailor to make it? But Van only smiled,
"It was...for someone else. She...she was to wear it on our wedding day...but," His smile was tainted with sadness and pain, "but..she left." He turned away, and looked out the window. Yukari's heart wrenched. There was so much pain, just in his expression and in his voice.
"I couldn't.." Yukari whispered, "I couldn't wear something so special."
"No." Van turned, and whispered fiercely, and his eyes sparked, "you must, she would want this."
Yukari's eyes gazed at the dress, then at the pain-filled king. Who was this mysterious princess that first Allen mentions, and now Van speaks of with so much pain? Van's eyes pleaded,
"Please, Yukari, wear it. If, not for me, then, for Allen."
Yukari blushed. Van smiled sadly,
"He is waiting down there."
Her head shot up. "He went?"
Van shrugged, "I guess he had motivation." He looked at her pointedly. Yukari blushed deeper.
"Oh." Was all she said. Van turned and headed out the door.
"I'll be waiting out here."
*****************************
Van faced out the window, his gaze once more going to that goddamn moon. He tore his eyes away. Was this the right thing? Hitomi herself had drawn the sketches for that dress. It had been for their special day. Van remembered...
Flash "Van! Look, look, look what I drew!" Hitomi ran up to him, her green eyes positively glowing. Van's heart wrenched. How much he loved her, he couldn't' describe, but always that feeling of dread that one day, she would have to leave, always loomed over him. He looked at the few pieces of parchment that she grasped. On them, were simple sketches of figures, on them, were painted on different styles of gowns, styles of which he had never seen before.
"Hmm, what are these Hitomi?"
"They're sketches, of dresses. These dresses, Van, they are the dresses from my world. This is what people wear when they go to fancy parties, or dances..." She stopped, gazing lovingly into Van's eyes. How precious their time was now, how little of it was left. Van felt a love that he thought he would never feel again.
"Hitomi,"
"Yes Van?" She gazed expectantly into his eyes. He always felt as if she could read him like an open book, could sense his every thought.
"Do people in your world, wear these dresses when.." He trailed off. Hitomi blinked, her green eyes like pools of depth less water.
"When what Van?"
Van hesitated, but his heart and soul wouldn't be denied. "When a person gets married?"
Hitomi's eyes grew huge, then she smiled, a big smile. A smile that contained all her love for him.
"Yes, Van. They do wear these dresses."
End of Flash
Van remembered that later, he had ordered the best tailors in the nation to recreate those dresses on the paper. How long it had taken, to laboriously sew on each and every bead. How many pearls had had to be collected? But through the entire thing, Hitomi had been there. Van turned, and his soul wrenched. Yukari stood there, gazing down at the ground, dressed in the gown that had been intended for marriage. Yukari fit perfectly in the gown, her slender form accented by the gown, only more so because of the glistening pearls. Her dark hair was a sharp contrast from the pale dress, and Yukari's even paler skin. Her dark eyes were luminous and dark. She could outshine any princess. Van smiled at her.
"Much better, don't you think?"
Yukari smiled, but then gazed up at him, unsure. "Van, are you sure?" Her fingers traced a bead.
Van smiled, was he sure? Would this dress cause too much pain? Would this dress reopen a freshly closed wound? There was something about this girl, something different, something he couldn't pinpoint. But he was sure.
"I'm sure Yukari."
Yukari smiled, and that aura around her only heightened. Van offered his arm.
"Shall we?" He smiled.
Yukari slipped her arm through his, and, though her heart was shaking a mile a minute, exited the warm comforts of her private, safe quarters.
******************************************
Allen glanced once more out the window. The time was dragging on forever, and the ball had only just barely begun. He stood near the wall, trying to blend in without making it seem too obvious. The royalties whirled around, their gowns glistening and shimmering in the brightly lit hall. The orchestra honked out tune after tune. But Allen was not in the mood to be taken up in the festivities. He thought back wistfully, back to when he had used to own these kinds of social events. How all the ladies had gathered up, to dance with him. How he had been the king of the ball. Now look at him, sniveling in the corner, almost afraid to come out. Part of it could be because, if he entered the main circle of events, Millerna would surely notice him, and require it of him to dance with her, which it was only his duty to do so. Allen couldn't quite figure out why this was a bad thing. His eyes traveled to the center of all the dancing, to find Millerna, her face breaking into a perfect smile, dancing perfectly with some other royalty. He knew, it was no secret, what she wanted, what she felt for him. And he should be happy, for, Millerna was both beautiful as well as pleasant, and even more, she was princess, which would make him king if he married her. But why did he cower in the corner, afraid for lest she should request to dance with him.
He kept pushing that one question that kept nagging at him. Pushing it to the back corners of his mind, but it kept resurfacing. His eyes scanned the crowds of people and dancers, searching out one individual, but found nothing. He tried not to think about it. He was being silly, how idiotic for a knight to act like this, like a coward, sneaking peeks into the crowd, looking for a silly girl. She was only a girl, that's all. That's all she ever was...but, his heart throbbed painfully at the thought of her smiling up at him. What did she do to him?! Wasn't she the reason he was attending this damn thing in the first place? No, his rational mind told him slowly, no, you came because you are obliged to. But....you didn't' have to, his heart burst forth again, returning the comment.
"Stop it." He muttered, silencing his inner voices. How meddlesome they could be! He barely even noticed that a hush had fallen over the crowds of royalty, until someone elbowed him in the ribs, and whispered,
"Look! Look!"
Allen turned, and tried to peer around the pillar he was hiding behind, but whoever it was, that one person had managed to drop a silence over the entire room. He turned to the person to his right, who happened to be a commander in the Asturian army.
"Who is she? Why is everyone so quiet?" He asked. The commander seemed absorbed in whatever he was looking at.
"She walks in beauty." The commander breathed. Allen rolled his eyes, and moved to another area where he could get a better view. He crossed a crowd of dancers, and then a group of ladies. Someone grabbed a hold of his cloak. He turned, and saw Van.
"Van! Who...what's going on?"
Allen wondered at the excited expression on Van's face, his slightly flushed cheeks. He just pulled Allen along gently, weaving through the people. Allen followed, mostly because he was too confused not to.
Suddenly the people cleared, and Allen saw what was the center of attention. Allen stopped short, his legs not quite working anymore. It was a girl, yes, that part was true, but woman would've fitted the term much better. She was dressed in a glittering, jeweled dress, that was unlike anything he had ever seen. It was....so elegant, and yet, accenting every curve and line in the girl's slender form. The dress itself could've outdone any queen or princess, but even more surprising was the girl wearing it. Allen stared in open-mouthed wonderment, as Yukari, her cheeks blushing, stared at her feet. She looked.....so different, yet, some part of him had always pictured her like this. Allen had to take several moments before he could find his tongue.
"Yukari! What..." He trailed off.
Yukari blushed, her eyes going to all the pairs of eyes regarding her. Van tugged at his sleeve,
"Do something!" He hissed. Allen immediately took action, mostly because he didn't know what else to do.
"Start the music." He turned to the orchestra. The conductor nodded, and turned back to the players. A quick waltz quickly picked up. Most of the people had their fun of gawking, and left, returning back to their dancing and socializing. Allen approached Yukari, he felt his knees going weak. What was happening to him? Had he ever felt like this before?
"You came." He said finally. Yukari nodded, her dark eyes not meeting his.
"So did you." She whispered. The slender bones of her fingers reached up to brush a stray hair from her face. Her hair was so dark, so glossy.
Around them, couples whirled and danced. And in the midst of all that dancing, they stood there, staring at each other, each unsure of what the other was thinking, each unsure of what each was supposed to do.
Finally, Allen remembered to be a man, and he extended his hand, trying to stop it from shaking too noticeably. What did she do to him? He was a knight, he shouldn't behave like this. But that didn't stop his emotions from flooding him.
"May I, have this dance?" He asked finally.
Yukari looked away, trying to hide a smile that made her entire face light up so that his heart seemed to be gripped in an iron fist.
"I can't dance." She muttered, backing away slightly. Allen smiled, she was so cute. Taking one of her hands, he spoke,
"I'll teach you."
~***~
I clearly remember this scene from a dream, I swear I do. I was embarrassed, first, I thought Van had deserted me, and then all those awful people just stared at me, like I was a freak! But...its all worth it, I'm sure I've dreamed this before. I know it. Because, its like one of those moments, moments that only really happen in movies, where the girl thinks she's hit the bottom, only to find that her guy is waiting for her at the end of the road! But..I've proven that, its not only in movies! This moment, it was like every second was a millenia, do you get what I mean? I could feel my heart beating every second, and...it dragged on forever. But, I really would've have had it any other way. Its one of those moments, these moments that I know I will remember forever, and someday perhaps it will be these moments that I tell my children about...
God, I cannot believe this. I am dancing with Allen Schezar. Could I be hoping too hard that he feels the same for me that I feel for him? No, I will not dwell in the present, I will hope that later. For now, I've got to know, is this a dream?....am I dreaming within a dream?
