ACT THREE

FADE IN:

EST. KENNEDY HIGH - THE NEXT DAY

Another establishing shot.

CUT TO:

INT. GIRLS' BATHROOM

Lily, Sam and Carmen are holding a conference.

CARMEN
Okay, what is so important?

LILY
I need you guys to help me save
Mary Cherry.

SAM
Okay, normally, I try to
sympathize with Mary Cherry—but
right now, we are just moments
away from walking into chemistry
class and dooming ourselves to a
long, hot, boring stretch of
summer school.

LILY
Guys! This is serious! I hacked
into the hospital database, and
they have her scheduled for a
lobotomy at four-thirty this
afternoon!

CARMEN
You know, they ARE doctors—okay,
so they're greedy and corrupt, but
still, they're doctors.
Maybe...maybe a lobotomy is the
best thing for her.

LILY
But she's not crazy! I know
what's wrong with her! Look—I got
into her locker, and I found a
bunch of these.

She holds up an empty glass bottle with a lightning bolt
label.

Carmen takes the bottle.

CARMEN
Yeah, this is that new energy
drink. Mary Cherry was guzzling
these by the case when we were
working out for Bring It tryouts.
She swore it melted off body fat.

LILY
But I read at health-food-watch
dot-com that this drink contains
the extract from an exotic herb
from Thailand. I did some
research, and I found out that
ingesting this extract can cause
psychotic behavior!

SAM
So you think Mary Cherry had an
allergic reaction to this stuff.

LILY
Exactly! But, it said the effects
go away after a week to ten days.
She should be fine now—well, as
fine as she usually is. Except
that she's locked in the psych
ward, about to get her brain cut
up!

SAM
Okay, you've convinced me.
So...we just tell the doctors what
the problem is.

CARMEN
Yeah, but... They wanna put her
in an institution and milk her for
her mother's money. They might
not even WANT to listen to us.

LILY
If we can get her out of there,
then we can prove that she's back
to normal.

SAM
So—we need a plan.

Carmen and Sam look at Lily expectantly.

SAM (CONT'D)
You don't have a plan?

LILY
(defensively)
I'm working on it. I need you
guys to meet me at the hospital
right after school.

Sam and Carmen exchange glances.

CARMEN
We're there.

FLIP CUT TO:

INT. CHEMISTRY CLASS - MOMENTS LATER

Lily, Carmen and Sam walk in together.

GLASS
(looking up)
About time! McPherson, get the
door.

Sam turns back and closes the door before taking her seat.

GLASS (CONT'D)
Now, then! In front of you, you
will find the STAR-7 chemistry
test. You will have until the end
of class to complete this test.
You will then place your completed
tests in this box.

She taps a cardboard box on the table.

GLASS (CONT'D)
They will then be scored according
to this key.

She holds up a booklet labeled "Answer Key", and deliberately
lays it on the table.

GLASS (CONT'D)
Now, to ensure that I am not
bombarded with a host of pointless
questions, I am going to curl up
with the latest issue of "Purrfect
Breeding" and a Barry Manilow
greatest hits CD.
I do NOT expect to be disturbed
unless the building is burning
down! UNDERSTOOD?

The kids trade looks. Miss Glass sits down, sets a pair of
earphones over her ears, unfolds her magazine, and turns away
from the class.

GLASS (CONT'D)
(waving over the back of the chair)
Begin!

Miss Glass relaxes, while behind her there is a mad scramble
for the answer key. In a second, everyone is crowded around
the table, grabbing for the booklet.

SAM
(waving her hands)
Hang on, everybody! Wait! Hold
on!

Finally she gets everyone's attention.

SAM (CONT'D)
Look, we owe it to ourselves, to
do this the right way.
(pause)
One person reads the answers out
loud, and everyone writes them
down.

Everyone nods in general agreement.

CUT INTO:

MONTAGE

of Sam calling out the answers, the other kids filling in
bubbles, and finally tests being tossed into the cardboard
box.

CUT TO:

INT. CHEMISTRY CLASS - LATER

Miss Glass takes off her headphones and stands up. The answer
key is back on the table, and the kids are all sitting
innocently at their seats. She reaches over and flips through
the tests in the box.

GLASS
I assume there won't be any summer
school this year?

SAM
Oh, I think you can count on that,
Miss Glass.

The bell rings.

GLASS
Good!

Everyone breaks for the door.

EFFECT CUT TO:

INT. HOSPITAL CORRIDOR - LATER

Lily and Carmen are huddled in the corridor.

CARMEN
I dunno about this...

LILY
It'll work. Trust me.

SAM (O.S.)
Well, guys? What do you think?

Carmen and Lily turn around.

ANGLE: SAM

having just stepped out of a restroom. She has her hair up,
and is wearing a white lab coat and glasses. Pinned to her
lapel is a fake hospital ID badge.

LILY
Not bad.

SAM
Okay—wish me luck.

Sam strides purposefully towards the nurse's desk. The nurse
looks up as she approaches.

SAM (CONT'D)
(trying to sound authoritative)
Excuse me...I'd like to see Mary
Cherry? She's a patient here.

Before the nurse can answer, a doctor—a real doctor—appears at
Sam's side.

BUCKMAN
Can I help you? I'm Dr. Buckman.
I'm on Miss Cherry's case. And
you are...?

SAM
(thinking fast)
Ah, um, Dr...McPherson.

She abruptly sticks out her hand, and gets it shaken.

SAM (CONT'D)
Yes, uh, Miss Cherry's mother,
Cherry Cherry, she, ah, just flew
me in from, uh, Geneva, where I've
been studying, um, brain surgery.

BUCKMAN
(nodding)
Mrs. Cherry does seem to enjoy
spending money. You're the third
expert we've had in here in the
last week.

SAM
(laughing nervously)
Uh, right!

BUCKMAN
No offense, but you seem a
bit...young.

SAM
(waves dismissively)
Please, no Doogie Howser jokes.
I've already heard them all.

BUCKMAN
Sorry... So, will you be
performing the procedure?

SAM
Oh—no, no...I'll just be, um,
observing.

BUCKMAN
To tell you the truth, I'm a bit
relieved. This will be my first
lobotomy—on a live person, I mean.
Say, do you mind if I go over the
procedure with you? I'd welcome
your input.

SAM
(at a loss)
Well, ah...

Dr. Buckman opens a folder on the counter and begins tracing
over x-rays with his finger.

BUCKMAN
I thought I'd make the first
incision here, moving
laterally...

As Buckman continues talking, Sam looks back at where Carmen
and Lily are discreetly watching, throwing her hands up in a
silent plea for help. Lily makes a "keep going" motion.

CARMEN
She's in trouble. Should I pull
the fire alarm?

LILY
No, no—she can handle it.

CARMEN
(considers)
Should I find out where the fire
alarm IS?

LILY
Okay, that might be a good idea.

CARMEN
Gotcha.

Meanwhile, Sam turns her attention back to Dr. Buckman just as
he is finishing up.

BUCKMAN
...and then I'll close using a
radial stitching pattern.

He closes the folder and looks at her expectedly.

SAM
(nodding)
Ah, it's...exactly what I would
do.

BUCKMAN
(flirting)
You know, I meant what I said
before. Without the glasses and
with your hair different, you
could really pass for a teenager.

SAM
Yes, if I'd been smart, I would've
gone to acting school. I could be
on "Roswell" right now.
(shrugs)
But—medicine called, and here I
am.
(changing the subject)
Um, if you don't mind, I'd like to
check in on the patient personally
for a few minutes.

BUCKMAN
Oh—of course.
(to the nurse)
I need the key to six?

The nurse fishes a key out of a drawer and hands it to Dr.
Buckman, who in turn hands it over to Sam.

BUCKMAN (CONT'D)
She's in iso room six.
(pointing)
Down the hall, turn right, last
door on the left. You don't have
to worry—we've got her strapped up
tight. She was quite violent when
she was admitted.

SAM
Thank you, doctor.

BUCKMAN
(checking his watch)
Well, I've got another patient to
see.

He walks away.

BUCKMAN (CONT'D)
(calling back)
I'll see you in scrubs!

SAM
Um, yes!
(trailing off)
That's, ah...exactly where you'll
see me...

Sam takes off down the corridor as quickly as she can without
being conspicuous.

CUT TO:

INT. GIRLS' BATHROOM

Cherry Cherry is sitting quietly on the tuffet when Miss Glass
comes in, whistling.

GLASS
Oh—I didn't realize...anyone was
in here.

CHERRY CHERRY
Greetings, Bobbi Glass. Yes, I,
Cherry Cherry, am indulgin' in a
moment of reflection. Seein' as
how my only daughter has gone
'round the bend, I'm here,
communin' with her
spirit...whatever that was.

GLASS
Well, she definitely spent more
time here than in my class.
(considers)
Or, any other class.

Cherry Cherry dabs delicately at her eye with a handkerchief.

GLASS (CONT'D)
Um, I'll just—let you get back to
your communioning.

With that, Miss Glass backs out the door.

CUT TO:

INT. MARY CHERRY'S ROOM

The door cracks open, and Sam pokes her head in. She rushes
over to the bed where Mary Cherry is lying, wrapped in a
straightjacket. As she motions Lily inside, Mary Cherry opens
her eyes.

MARY CHERRY
Spam? Oh, Lord, I knew it—I've
died and gone to Hell!

SAM
(rolls her eyes)
You're not in Hell, Mary Cherry,
you're in the hospital. We're
rescuing you.

MARY CHERRY
We?

She turns her head and focuses on Lily

MARY CHERRY (CONT'D)
Lil Lily! I've been in a
nightmare—I dreamed, that I had an
identical hip-hop twin sister, and
she sent me to an orphanage, and
then my Mama, who was really my
Daddy, showed up, and took me
home, and—

LILY
(holding up a hand)
Mary Cherry, relax. You just had
a bad reaction to that energy
drink you were drinking so much
of. You should be completely back
to normal by now.

MARY CHERRY
Is that all? Well, then, get this
thing offa me, and get me the heck
outta here!

SAM
(nods)
Yep—she's back to normal.
(looking around)
Where's Carmen?

LILY
I, uh...kinda lost her.

Sam throws up her hands quizzically.

SAM
Okay, help me...

Together Sam and Lily get Mary Cherry up into a sitting
position, and Sam begins to inspect the buckles of the
straightjacket.

MARY CHERRY
(impatiently)
What're you doin' back there,
Spam?

SAM
Mary Cherry, if you don't be
quiet, I'm gonna let them do that
lobotomy on you.

Just then Carmen appears in the doorway, pssting urgently

CARMEN
Guys! There's doctors coming this
way!

SAM
Uh-oh. Okay, we have to do this
later. Come on—

Sam and Lily stand Mary Cherry up and help her hobble to the
door. Carmen is there with a gurney parked in the corridor.

LILY
What's this?

CARMEN
Trust me—just get her on it!

LILY
(to Mary Cherry)
Okay, up you go...

With some grunting and heaving, they manage to get Mary Cherry
laid out on the gurney. Carmen throws a sheet over her, and
they start to push her down the hallway. Unfortunately, at
the first intersection a pair of doctors walking down the
cross-corridor spot them.

DOCTOR #1
Hey! What are you doing?

Sam looks at Lily.

SAM
Now what?

LILY
RUN!

They take off, pushing the gurney wildly down the corridor,
with the doctors in close pursuit.

DOCTOR #1
Stop! Call Security!

SAM
(to Lily)
I thought you had a plan!

LILY
This IS the plan!

CARMEN
(pointing)
Elevator!

With Sam pushing the gurney, the run pell-mell for the
elevator at the end of the hall.

LILY
Are you sure you know that you're
doing?

CARMEN
Trust me! I saw this in "Star
Trek IV"—it worked like a charm!

Lily runs ahead and pushes the call button. The doors open
and they pile inside, with their pursuers just seconds behind.
Carmen frantically pushes the "Door Close" button, and as the
doors close:

LILY
(looking over at Carmen)
Didn't they have TRANSPORTERS in
"Star Trek IV"?

CARMEN
Oops...

The doors close just in the nick of time.

CUT TO:

INT. THE ELEVATOR CAR - CONTINUOUS

Sam looks at the panel and see that Carmen has pushed the "L"
button.

SAM
No—second floor! Second floor!

As Carmen presses the "2" button, Sam starts ripping open the
straps of Mary Cherry's straightjacket.

SAM (CONT'D)
(to Lily)
Get her legs!

In a few moments, Sam is pulling the straightjacket off of
Mary Cherry. Lily reaches into her bag and pulls out a dress,
handing it to her, while Sam shucks her lab coat.

LILY
Here, put this on!

Mary Cherry examines the garment critically.

MARY CHERRY
Is this OFF THE RACK?

LILY
Mary Cherry!

MARY CHERRY
Oh, all right...

CARMEN
(to Lily)
YOU saw "Star Trek IV"?

LILY
Well, yeah, it's the one where
they—

Carmen realizes where Lily's going:

LILY/CARMEN
(simultaneously)
—save the whales.

CARMEN
(rolls her eyes)
...of course.

CUT TO:

INT. HOSPITAL CORRIDOR - MOMENTS LATER

On the second floor, the elevator doors open. The girls peek
out, then run down the hallway, Sam leading the way.

SAM
Come on!

LILY
Sam, where are we going?

Sam opens a plain, unmarked door leading to a narrow set of
stairs.

SAM
I learned about this when Harrison
was here. Come on!

CUT TO:

EXT. HOSPITAL BUILDING

A service door opens, and the girls come rushing out. They
check around, then take off across the parking lot.

CUT TO:

INT. GIRLS' BATHROOM - LATER

Cherry Cherry turns in astonishment as the girls come in.

MARY CHERRY
Mama! What are you doing here?

CHERRY CHERRY
More important, child, is what are
YOU doing here? Did they cut
your brain up already?

MARY CHERRY
No, Mama, I am cured! I am one
hundred-percent sane!

Sam throws a sardonic glance at Lily.

CHERRY CHERRY
(peering closely)
Are you sure?

MARY CHERRY
(grinning)
Cross my heart!

CHERRY CHERRY
Well, praise Jesus!

As Cherry Cherry heads for her, Mary Cherry throws open her
arms and rushes towards her. Of course, Cherry Cherry walks
right past her daughter, and she tumbles to the floor.

CHERRY CHERRY (CONT'D)
Now I can face the Board of
Directors again!

Cherry Cherry sweeps right past the girls and out the door.

CARMEN
Guys, I think our work here is
done.

She and Sam trade nods, and they turn and walk out; while Mary
Cherry picks herself up, still grinning, and gives Lily two
big thumbs up.

FADE OUT.

END OF ACT THREE