It was only a few hours later that Mark felt in control enough to go home. As he started back to the loft he was regretting facing Roger and having to explain to the guitarist what exactly had happened earlier. He did not know what he was going to tell him and silently rehearsed different excuses and stories on his walk. Mark suddenly realized he was on his friend Collins' street. He decided to put off facing Roger for a little longer and went and knocked on the door. Collins answered the door, the phone against his ear.
"Here he is." He motioned for Mark to come in, and then continued the conversation, "No, why don't I talk to him first. I'll have him call you, ok?" Collins looked over at Mark and nodded to the couch and Mark went over and sat, listening to Collins' end of the conversation. "I promise I won't let him leave until you talk to him. Fine, ok, I'll see you soon." Mark picked up a magazine and pretended to thumb threw it while Collins was hanging up the phone. He came over and sat on the coffee table facing Mark, "I'll give you one guess as to who that was."
"Roger." Mark replied unenthusiastically. "Let me guess, he's pissed."
"More worried than pissed I would say. You really freaked him out. That was the fifth time he called me since you left. Each time was from a different payphone; he's been searching for you all over. Where the hell were you anyway?"
"If I told, then I would be found next time." Mark grinned wickedly at his friend and tried to change the subject. "Your place looks good, I haven't been here for awhile."
"Yeah, thanks, and good try. What exactly happened? We know it has something to do with Maureen."
At the mention of his ex-girlfriends name, Mark tensed and looked away. "No… no it doesn't." He didn't know if it did or not, he just didn't want to give her the satisfaction.
"Please," Collins rolled his eyes, "Roger called her too and she told him that you were with her this afternoon and took off from her in a rage. She didn't know what to do, but knew you were irrational so she didn't go after you." Mark just shook his head.
"Maureen has her own version of the truth." He started pulling at the fringes of Collins homemade blanket that covered the couch, "do we have to talk about this?"
"Yup, afraid so. Besides, Roger will be here any minute." As if he was waiting for his cue, a pounding noise came from the other side of the door. Roger didn't wait for an invitation just barged in and got in Mark's face.
"WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GO?" He pulled Mark by his the collar of his sweater, almost choking him. Collins came from behind and pulled him away from Mark's small frame. Mark's face had quickly turned red from the lack of oxygen and he let out a few coughs.
"Well, that is my cue to leave." He was able to sputter out between coughs and stood up to, Roger quickly pushed him back on the couch. "Or not."
"What the hell is going on Mark?" Roger's voice was a little calmer, but not too much. Mark remained silent and Roger looked over at Collins, "How should I handle this?" Collins wasn't sure if he was asking for help or asking for permission to beat it out of him. He decided that if was the former and squashed down next to Mark.
"Mark, what caused you to get so angry at Maureen and Roger?"
All of the energy that he had in the afternoon, had now left and Mark felt nothing. He looked from Roger's rough, stern face to Collins' strong yet gentle expression and felt nothing for either of them. His entire body felt nothing. He didn't have a reaction or a response to their inquiries. He just shrugged, hoping that would be enough, but knowing it wouldn't.
"Look guys, I'm tired, can we talk about this later? I think I just want to go home and go to sleep." If he pretended that he cared what they thought, then maybe he could escape this conversation.
"Not a chance." Roger's voice was stern. He grabbed Mark again, who was trying to stand and pushed him back into the couch. "Look, I'm worried about you. You have been acting weird for months now, and then what happened today… I have never seen you like that." That was the most compassionate that Roger got, and a small part of Mark knew it, still it didn't reach him.
Collins decided to chime in, "It has been pretty obvious you aren't happy lately, we want to know why."
Mark, who had slid down so far on the couch he was practically laying down, just looked at them blankly. He realized they wanted a real answer, "What is there to be happy about?" His response was blunt and to the point. Collins didn't react, but Roger's face registered a look of shock for a slight moment, before turning cold again. They both remained quiet and waited for Mark to continue. Mark closed his eyes for a moment and looked at them, "Look, I'm fine. Aren't we all allowed to flip out once in a while? Maureen pissed me off and I was mad, that was all."
"You weren't just mad, you were out of control." Roger retaliated.
"Oh and you have never been out of control?" Roger deeply sighed and leaned back, knowing he didn't have a point to argue against that. "I just wanted to be alone, and you wouldn't let me. That is why I took off." There, maybe that will satisfy them and he could lie completely down and drift to sleep like he wanted.
Collins and Roger exchanged looks trying to decipher if the other was satisfied with Mark's answers. Collins decided to make one more point, "Mark, you never leave the loft anymore, you just said so yourself, you haven't been here in ages. We're worried about you.
"I've been working." Mark countered quickly.
"Unless you are making a film about the interior of your room, you haven't shot anything for weeks." Roger rebutted just as quickly.
This caused Mark to sit up and at last an emotion entered him, one of pure resentment. This feeling closely mirrored the one he felt in his room a few hours before. "Like you fucking know what the hell I'm doing in my room. It isn't like you take the time to ask." Mark stood up on the couch and jumped over the backside and headed to the door, before Roger or Collins could stop him. "Don't bother looking for me this time." He stepped out of the apartment and onto the street and set of in a random direction.
Collins watched him from the window, shaking his head. "Well that was interesting. You're right, there is something definitely wrong with him." He sat down on the sofa, to the spot that Mark had been moments before.
"I told you, did you see the look in his eyes? That vacant look has been there for months and then all of the sudden… they are like fire. I don't know what to do."
"I don't know, maybe we should call Maureen and Joanne and have them come over. Perhaps we can all put the pieces together and figure out what is going on in our friend's head."
"Yeah, good idea. I'll call Mimi and tell her to come by after work too."
"What about Benny?"
Roger looked at Collins as if he were nuts, but then slowly nodded, "Yeah, call Benny."
